Female Infertility - General discussion and venting (minus powerleveling if you can help it); AKA the thing troons whine about, but have no concept of outside of being an accessory to their fetish;

[cottage crow]

We will adopt if this doesn't work, but we understand that there will likely be serious trauma and behavioural problems to work through. We have people in our lives who are very well qualified to advise us about how best to approach them, and help close by. Without that support I don't think I'd consider it, certainly not a sibling group which is what we would like to adopt.

That’s another thing that I worried about with adopting. Who knows if the mother drank while pregnant, which will almost guarantee the child has fetal alcohol syndrome? I don’t know if that’s something you can diagnose at birth. I raised those questions and the fertility clinic essentially told me that, in order to avoid situations like that, you would need to go through an adoption agency (which like I mentioned is almost as expensive as IVF). Adoption agencies are meant to weed out “ineligible” candidates.

However. I will say this.
I know there are behavioral problems that come from a child’s biological makeup that you cannot change—but I do believe a lot of that can be fixed through good parenting.

Congratulations! I'm very happy for you.

My AMH was so low that most local authorities won't fund IVF at all, so it was always a long shot. It has been extremely hard, even when I'm not on hormones making my mood unstable.

Troons can fuck off. They will never know this pain.

Thank you for the kind words. I am so very sorry you’ve been on this journey for so long. Sometimes when I feel angry or sorry for myself that we had to do this at all, I have to remind myself how lucky we are that it worked for us in the first place.

If you ever want to vent about it, but don’t want to post in the thread, you can dm me. You don’t have to of course. Just putting it out there as an option for you.

I’ll be thinking about you and saying a prayer. I truly hope it works for you this time.

 

[rachael slur]

I think stress was the major factor in my infertility, along with endometriosis. Took many years to conceive despite being very fit and eating healthy.

My first retrieval and transfer were successful. If anyone would like information about my protocol or experience feel free to ask here or in DMs. Ended up pregnant again the first time we had sex postpartum and have been able to continue growing our family the old-fashioned way.

We actually have a few frozen embryos left and are trying to navigate the world of private embryo donation to see if that would be the right fit. It's a mindfuck for sure.

 

[Stupid Lisa Garbageface]

We've been trying for a good long while now. Husband's sperm are healthy and plentiful so it's on me. I'll be going in for the first round of testing if this cycle doesn't take.

Someone in my family who is much younger than I am is also trying to get pregnant right now and I just know she's going to be instantly successful. I am really, really not looking forward to white-knuckling my way through that Facetime call.

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

However, insisting on "having one of his own" is always the insecure, moidy excuse from a male perspective.

That's idiotic. I am a woman and want kids and I want them to be mine- to have them grow in me, feel their kicks, and seeing the features of my ancestors once they're born.
Also, adoption should be done for the wellbeing of the child, not as a "treatment" for infertility. Kids in foster care usually come with a huge baggage of trauma, health issues, potentially mental health problems and behavioral problems. I take care of myself precisely to avoid those problems in my offspring as much as possible, because I don't want to deal with them when the kid isn't even mine.

We've been trying for a good long while now. Husband's sperm are healthy and plentiful so it's on me. I'll be going in for the first round of testing if this one doesn't take.

I wish you all the best! Please consider doing HyCoSy, if you haven't already. It's not the most glamorous procedure but provides an interesting insight into your health.

@cottage crow OP, how are you doing? How are you feeling?
I deeply sympathize with you and your struggles. I am also battling infertility, unfortunately IVF is my only option left. Such a shame, I have always wanted to have kids the old-fashioned way, instead of this highly surgical and sterile process- but it is what it is. Hopefully we'll both get lucky in no time!

 

[cottage crow]

I wish you all the best! Please consider doing HyCoSy, if you haven't already. It's not the most glamorous procedure but provides an interesting insight into your health.

@cottage crow OP, how are you doing? How are you feeling?
I deeply sympathize with you and your struggles. I am also battling infertility, unfortunately IVF is my only option left. Such a shame, I have always wanted to have kids the old-fashioned way, instead of this highly surgical and sterile process- but it is what it is. Hopefully we'll both get lucky in no time!

What is HyCoSy? I've never heard of it. I could google it of course but what is your experience with that and why do you recommend it?

Thanks for asking! I don't want to divulge too much personal information, like what week or trimester I'm in etc., but we are doing alright. Baby seems to be healthy and progressing as expected, according to my OB doctor. I think these days my #1 fear is preterm labor. I have also been struggling with eating. For some reason, food does not appeal to me whatsoever. I'm taking medications the doctor recommended to solve this, but still to no avail. I am past the morning sickness phase, I just do not feel hungry. Ever. I have to constantly remind myself to eat, and when I am eating I pretty much have to force it down.

It honestly feels as though I am on Ozempic which is weird to me, because I always assumed I'd be eating like a fat fucking pig after morning sickness phase.

I'll be thinking about you and saying a prayer for your success. And also that your butt bounces back fast after all of the backshots (lol) you'll be taking. My ass is still sore and gets tingly sometimes even though it has been months since I last had to have an injection.

ETA: It also is very interesting to me that true infertility (i.e. not by choice) is on the rise in younger and younger people. I blame the quality of our food supply and all of the chemicals they put in our shit.

 

[rosecig]

ETA: It also is very interesting to me that true infertility (i.e. not by choice) is on the rise in younger and younger people. I blame the quality of our food supply and all of the chemicals they put in our shit.

I wonder how much of it is just due to better diagnosing, since infertility is defined as any issue causing you not to conceive within a year. Very few people are actually completely incapable of reproduction. I bet before modern medicine, a lot of people took several years to conceive and it was treated as normal, but now that people start trying later with a more specific timeline it's more problematic.

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

What is HyCoSy? I've never heard of it. I could google it of course but what is your experience with that and why do you recommend it?

I am sorry for not responding yet, I've been dealing with some cat issues lately and simply forgot. I will do my best to respond tomorrow. In the meantime I wish everyone here a pleasant day

 

[Stupid Lisa Garbageface]

We've been trying for a good long while now. Husband's sperm are healthy and plentiful so it's on me. I'll be going in for the first round of testing if this cycle doesn't take.

Someone in my family who is much younger than I am is also trying to get pregnant right now and I just know she's going to be instantly successful. I am really, really not looking forward to white-knuckling my way through that Facetime call.

I'm about through my first trimester now so I can confidently say that posting on KiwiFarms has a 100% success rate for solving fertility problems.

 

[cottage crow]

I'm about through my first trimester now so I can confidently say that posting on KiwiFarms has a 100% success rate for solving fertility problems.

YO that is awesome. Congratulations!! I will be praying for a happy, healthy pregnancy for you.

Kiwisisters who are struggling out there:

There is hope. Keep trying, keep researching, and keep going to those stupid, depressing appointments with doctors who feel like they’re not even listening to what you’re telling them—and make them listen.

 

[Rainbow Child]

There is hope. Keep trying, keep researching, and keep going to those stupid, depressing appointments with doctors who feel like they’re not even listening to what you’re telling them—and make them listen.

And, also, perhaps even more importantly: it's your duty as an older lady to teach the younger ladies and the girls that what you were taught, that what made you infertile (i.e. old), was a lie, and that anyone who would encourage them likewise to waste their fertile years chasing vanities, is going to be a devil?

 

[cottage crow]

And, also, perhaps even more importantly: it's your duty as an older lady to teach the younger ladies and the girls that what you were taught, that what made you infertile (i.e. old), was a lie, and that anyone who would encourage them likewise to waste their fertile years chasing vanities, is going to be a devil?

What are you trying to say? This isn't an anti-feminist sperging thread if that's where you're going with this. Insane behavior. Get lost, faggot.

Fertility declines with age. That is a biological fact. The decrease from one year to the next in the early 20s is small, but it is cumulative and becomes increasingly significant over time—particularly when comparing someone in their early 20s to someone in their early 30s. I don't think any of the ladies in this thread are disputing these biological facts here.

Age is not the only factor, but it is a major one. Genetics, overall health, what age you were when you first started your cycle, and reproductive history can all influence fertility.

Personally, I am not old. We began trying to have children at an age when many people do. No, I will not say what age that was.
However, I also started my period at a very young age (again, I blame all the hormones and bullshit chemicals that are in literally all of our food supply).

 

[Rainbow Child]

What are you trying to say?

I'm just saying that we have a responsibility for the following generations, and that we know from experience what was wrong about what we were told.

This isn't an anti-feminist sperging thread if that's where you're going with this.

ooooh, I see what you're trying to say. It was a rhetorical question, got it. Yeah, hon. You can read anti-whatever motives into basic adult wisdom for the next generation if that soothes the burn. That's fine, dear.

Personally, I am not old.

Then I wasn't talking to you, sweetheart. It's very heart-warming to see you trying to fulfil your duty to both the ancestors and the descendants. I'm sorry you're having trouble trying to conceive. And if you and your husband are not called to parenthood; that's okay, too. If I was in your position, I would be even more disappointed in the older ladies who wasted what I (i.e. you) would have put to good use if it had been entrusted to me (you).

 

[Arbiter]

I pray that all the kiwisisters and their families in this thread have health, wealth, and many blessings going into the new year. I appreciate all of you taking the time to share your experiences here. I know it's not easy to post about such a sensitive topic on a site like this.

 

[cottage crow]

Then I wasn't talking to you, sweetheart. It's very heart-warming to see you trying to fulfil your duty to both the ancestors and the descendants. I'm sorry you're having trouble trying to conceive. And if you and your husband are not called to parenthood; that's okay, too. If I was in your position, I would be even more disappointed in the older ladies who wasted what I (i.e. you) would have put to good use if it had been entrusted to me (you).

God you really are a faggot who has never had sex, aren't you? You sound like a tranny autogynephile.

I won't derail this thread any further by responding to you after this, but I wanted to say something further about this real quick.

While it is true that fertility declines with age cumulatively year after year (women are born with a finite number of eggs, and each and every cycle gets rid of one or multiple), it is perfectly fine for women to wait to have children until they are ready for it. What is infinitely more retarded than waiting to have children is having children when you're mentally immature and not in a great place to support them whether that be financially, spiritually, or emotionally. I mean just look at most of the lolcows on this site.

So no, women should not be taught to shit out kids asap because "you never know, you could struggle the longer you wait." That's fucking retarded. You are retarded.
What would actually help is teaching young women essential life skills early on—financial literacy, debt avoidance, and how to choose a mature partner who treats them as an equal instead of a maid or emotional caretaker.

Thank you to everyone who has shared a little piece of grief/vulnerability in this thread. I have been grateful to share what little I could of my experience with people who know how it feels.

 

[Lian Xing]

it is perfectly fine for women to wait to have children until they are ready for it.

I don't know about anyone else, but I wasn’t ready for our first, and I don’t think there is anything I could have done to be ready. Sure, you can have all the things ready, but I was completely ill equipped for the emotional and physical drain. Experience helped greatly for number two. It did make me I wish I wouldn’t have waited as long as I did. Maybe I would have been able to handle the lack of sleep better? Clearly, I am not suggesting 14 year olds should be having children, but I think I might have handled the physical toll better in my mid to late 20s than my early 30s.

 

[cottage crow]

I don't know about anyone else, but I wasn’t ready for our first, and I don’t think there is anything I could have done to be ready. Sure, you can have all the things ready, but I was completely ill equipped for the emotional and physical drain.

Maybe I was overzealous with my language when I was making that point, as I’m sure there is never a perfect time or moment to have your first child. I feel like my husband and I prepared and prepared and prepared our asses off, and I still don’t fully know what to expect or how much this will impact our current lifestyle—because I’ve never done it before. You only hear from others what it’s like, which is different from experiencing it firsthand.

However, my point that women shouldn’t be ridiculed or taught not to wait until they feel they are ready for the responsibility still stands. I also think you have to be prepared to deal with the consequences of waiting, including the risk of struggling with fertility—or in your case, feeling like you don't have as much energy as you might have had when you were younger. We weren’t prepared to struggle, because we started trying at an age when many people are still plenty fertile. That’s just life, I guess.

 

[Velanna]

After being told I would never get pregnant due to PCOS, I unexpectedly became pregnant then had a miscarriage last weekend. I feel like im not over it and I feel so stupid because i get flustered so easily at my job

 

[fist_of_khonshu]

After being told I would never get pregnant due to PCOS, I unexpectedly became pregnant then had a miscarriage last weekend. I feel like im not over it and I feel so stupid because i get flustered so easily at my job

I also have PCOS and had this preconception, became unexpectedly pregnant, and miscarried 2 years ago. It's such a slam in the face because it definitely made me feel like something was wrong with me. I'm still not over it. Some people grieve or work through those emotions slower/faster than others. It's a big (and scary) thing to happen to you. Don't ever feel stupid for not being "over it".

 

[Motherf*cker]

I also have PCOS and had this preconception, became unexpectedly pregnant, and miscarried 2 years ago. It's such a slam in the face because it definitely made me feel like something was wrong with me. I'm still not over it. Some people grieve or work through those emotions slower/faster than others. It's a big (and scary) thing to happen to you. Don't ever feel stupid for not being "over it".

I have endomeOne of the hardest pills to swallow is my inability to naturally conceive and it's not for someone else to decide when they feel that you should be over it because it's such a personal journey.

I would never adopt, all I've seen are horror stories and even if it all goes fine your child is always going to be longing for another woman who isn't you.

 

[Milkweed]

My heart goes out to all you kiwis who have or are currently going through this. I was going to type something out about my experience but don’t want to make it about me. I just wanted to give my support, it really isn’t possible to understand the pain of fertility issues unless you have been there. I see you gorls and I wish you all happiness and peace <3