Damn, I always miss the fun threads when they’re actually happening…
After reading through the last 10 pages, I’ve come to the same conclusion as most of the other people commenting here: OP doesn’t actually want a relationship, he wants instant gratification without putting in the effort towards improving himself. That’s why I believe I have the perfect solution for not just OP, but any incel who finds themselves in the same predicament as him:
Heroin.
You see
@The_Cowcel, the good thing about maintaining a heroin habit is that unlike dating, the crippling learned helplessness you’ve fostered over the years isn’t a barrier of entry. All you need to do is purchase crypto, open a Tor browser, and start checking out online marketplaces that have reputable dealers. You’ve already admitted to spending most of your time on the computer, so you’re already 90% of the way there! Good job, go you!
The reason that heroin is perfect for someone like you is that it fills the same exact void that having a girlfriend does, but better than any dang, dirty
femoid ever could! It doesn’t care that you have no hobbies, no interests, and nothing to talk about; heroin loves you just the way you are! All that self-doubt you said you deal with every day? Heroin makes that aaaall melt away as you drift into the loving arms of bliss and relaxation! Now doesn’t that sound nice? Let’s see those hecking
females and the
terrorists who deny you their pleasure give you that!!
Now, I know what you’re thinking: “isn’t heroin dangerous?” Well
what are you, a fucking narc? guess what?
So’s dating. Ever heard of herpes? AIDS?
The blue waffle? The only way you have to worry about that sort of thing while doing heroin is if you share needles, and you already said you don’t have friends, so you’re already in the clear! Also disregard any other health risks you read about, they just tell you that stuff to scare you away from being happy because they’re jealous.
Now here’s the most important part: whatever you read about what is or isn’t a safe dose for beginners, take that number and double it… no,
triple it. You’re going to want to make up for all the satisfaction you’ve been missing out on over the years, and this is the best way to do it! Do as much as you can, as quickly as possible. The key takeaway here is that more=better: the more you do, the better you feel. Don’t hold back, because before long you’ll forget why you ever wanted a girlfriend in the first place!
I hope that you, and any other incel on this site, find this advice helpful and encouraging. You’ve already got nothing left to lose, so instead of swimming against the current like you are now, why not take easy street to achieving the same goal? I believe things can get better for you
@The_Cowcel, all you have to do is take the first step!