random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Crex Crex]

Don't use words you don't understand, unless you have seen the legendary post about cock shapes vs. rape success

 

[Among Us Gaming]

If I see someone with Deltarune or Undertale merchandise IRL over the age of 17, I'm calling ICE to deport you. Fucking hell.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Sandra Brand Sandra's canned, robust, and flavorful remains.

@HackerX

 

[Gentlebastard]

If you are looking to porn to increase birthrates, you are 31 flavours of fucked in the head.

I'm not really interested in hearing the Something Awful diaspora repent for their sins.

I'm here because I want to be notified when/if (let's face it, when) Velicity Von is found dead in a ditch in Clearwater, Florida.

Is this not a gossip forum?

Why the fuck do I even bother behaving like a civilised member of society and pay for my train ticket like some fucking chump.

YES THIS POST REQUIRES ALL CAPS!!!

Pollsters are ugly, dumb, and probably finger their dogs.

And yet people still oppose declaring war on the United Kingdom. The Trump administration wont event consider it, despite my letters.

Fatrick is probably a great catch for a closeted dyke. It's not everyday you see true and honest women with a killer rack like that, let alone a man. The faucet is so small that she probably just blurs her eyes and sees porkytits as a fat whiny butch.

I'm sorry, what in the fuck did you just say? It's "gay" to wash your fucking asshole?

I thought this thread was about niggers eating cornstarch, not niggers eating ass, so everyone either sprinkle some cornstarch on that anus, or get back on-topic.

I miss when shitty concepts were as poorly drawn as they were conceived.

Narcan is a mistake, we either need to ban it or have ghost pepper juice mixed in to make them wish they died when it gets sprayed up their nose.

He's like a Formula 1 mechanic that shot a wheelchair bound Schumacher in the leg and can't understand why no-one is returning his calls.

He'll cite the legal precedence of Shrek being able to run into a church while yelling "I object!"

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

A woman told me I stunk once so I found a dead skunk on the side of the road and threw it in her jeep compass. Women need to learn the price and folly of the stench fallacy.

I am going to be playing this game once it is fully released in 10 years so that I could enjoy the plot on a good pace and hate the game on a professional level

You talk like you've never had a midnight Wal*Mart blow job.

I can't even name five things I like.

Sometimes I do the roundabout thing just for the fun of it

My personal record is 17 rotations before getting bored

SIDS is a scam, just like post-partum. If they really wanted their babies back inside of them they'd just make another one.

I like onions but that looks like bugs

Been having to scroll Facebook lately because that's where major things are happening regarding family right now. But it's exposing me to Uncle Bob's fuckin' TDS

I don't have a stroke every time I have to use an Israeli-made instrument

Also Mullvad is from a faggot country for NIGGERS

also have developed a particular mad-on for people who drive pickup trucks

something like chocking on some faggot dick in a terrible queer lesbian platonic sex accident. In Japan

SPRINKLERBITCHING

I really do love Sing and Sing 2, even if it's Illumination. It's like Pitch Perfect except I don't hate every character and want to kill them all.

I thought this thread was about niggers eating cornstarch, not niggers eating ass, so everyone either sprinkle some cornstarch on that anus, or get back on-topic.

Are you the dude in the chicken suit who keeps beefing with Peter Griffin?

 

[The Nothingness]

I am dooming because it's been over a year and the Trump administration has made no serious progress in bringing the dinosaurs back to life.

 

[CallmeCicada]

He accused me that I killed and raped his daughter in 2040.

 

[Cun75p4rkl35]

I just need to get it off my chest how fucking tired I am of seeing Rasriel or whatever the fuck his name is's stupid :3 face I am just so goddam fucking tired

If I see someone with Deltarune or Undertale merchandise IRL over the age of 17, I'm calling ICE to deport you.

 

[Harm]

I'm obsessed with the La Guaira McDonald's story.

 

[Autistic Asparagus]

They/them beeze

 

[Harm]

He got my Gamejolt account banned. He leaked my Jolly 4 script. He accused me that I killed and raped his daughter in 2040.

 

[Aunt Carol]

OP has no penis with which to suck and fuck, which is now a very important part of her paramour's personal life.

Wait why are ankles bad, but the fuckin toes fine? wtf

Does taking cross sex hormones make you a vindictive idiot?

The only time I've been to a Chili's was in an airport. I am glad to report I did not get diarrhea.

Elmer Fudd skinned a Totoro to make that abomination.

I'm just saying but guys aren't trooning out in droves in order to LARP as women with actual status and influence... though if I ever see a dude skinwalking Hillary Clinton I will be running, not walking, to post him here.

Can anyone tell me if this book is going to make me consider chopping off my dong?

NO NIGGERS IN MY YAOI
NO
NIGGERS
IN
MY YAOI

 

[King Metalia]

Weird things a going. Weird things a coming. Weird things a doing...
...'round here

Death Stranding and its sequel are pretentious garbage that his sycophants try desperately to gaslight people into believing they're works of art.

 

[Harm]

Then he retrieves a nerf gun and fires it into the bear's head. Doing no damage as it's not even loaded.

 

[Autistic Joe]

The forbidden MTMTFTM transgender. Poonermaxxing is the new meta.

 

[Irregardless]

americans are the only actual humans, everyone else is bugs

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

You make some controversial but compelling points about the holocaust.

Faggot Josh actually took away my ability to change my pfp cuz i made a decapitated anime head scene (only cuz it was fitting for my name). Like nigga u can make that shit your profile pic on youtube if you wanted to. But not here ?

I mean, Hellaverse is a universe where it was decided the lady who tried to kill her husband and his mistress in front of a bunch of children when she found out he was cheating on her and then hired demonic hitmen in Hell to kill them when they survived was actually totally a lesbian the whole time, so........

Some generations got introduced to Lovecraft thru Barbra crampton and Jeffrey combs in from beyond. This generation gets minions.

The fat men want to commit miscegenation with bird women. God save us.

There are some fun porncow posts, but I learn way too much about my fellow Kiwis' sexual hang-ups in this thread. Talk about power-leveling, guys, jfc.

Second update on the "Judge Holden is forced to watch MLP with his niece" saga.

If you are looking to porn to increase birthrates, you are 31 flavours of fucked in the head.

I'm not really interested in hearing the Something Awful diaspora repent for their sins.

eta: git gud, piss fetish scrub I guess

That's it. I'm going all in on Yani Neko this season. Any anime that starts with an anthropomorphic cat girl violently shitting in the disgusting, tar stained hovel she lives in has no where else to go but up. I'm rooting for Neko-chan to turn her life around by Episode 7.

"You watch Friendship is MAGIC... Isn't magic satanic?".

most people are more stupid and ignorant to reality than you think

Any time I find out a man has had sex or a relationship I instantly become less sympathetic to his plight because that alone means he has achieved a greater level of success in his life than I could ever hope to. It's like expecting a homeless man to empathize with the suffering of a billionaire.