Im very lonely

[Godhead Heavy Industries]

With peace and love are you going to do something about it or just whine like a little bitch?

 

[Idiotron]

Have you tried doing anything social outside of your job?
I'm an autistic introvert but I've made some good choices as a kid and picked up music and dancing.
Especially dancing has enabled me to make friends after I was done with uni.
I encourage anybody struggling with loneliness to learn how to dance, it's a real game changer.

 

[Ughubughughughughughghlug]

All i can think of after reading what OP said is my university professor, farms giving the usual shit advice as always i think you shouldn't chase friendships after collage tbh just find someone to come home to (easier said than done)

For a long time I've thought that it was more important for men to prioritize friendships both for its own sake and because the basic social need of friendship has to be met before the person can be well-adjusted enough to date (and it helps massively).

But lately I've wondered if I wasn't wrong, or if it only applies to young men. Which, if a young man doesn't develop their confidence/approach skills as a young man, I guess they're just completely fucked. It's depressing how shitty everything gets.

I have schizoid personality disorder, so I don't really get lonely. But I am aware of how different I am.

That's how I was until college and then I basically turned much more normal.

Have you tried doing anything social outside of your job?
I'm an autistic introvert but I've made some good choices as a kid and picked up music and dancing.
Especially dancing has enabled me to make friends after I was done with uni.
I encourage anybody struggling with loneliness to learn how to dance, it's a real game changer.

I got stressed out by regular dancing, but was surprised with myself once when I was one of the first people on a dance floor dancing to modern music (kind that has no formula like swing/waltz/etc does). The only difference between looking retarded and looking baller is how confidently you assert yourself, which when you realize that the confidence is self-sustaining. I only did that once, though, just didn't happen to go back to an event like that with the same tone.

I keep meaning to make myself go to square dancing. That's formulaic but also communal, there's not even the minimum pressure of dancing with specific women. There's a reason pioneer communities going all the way back to Medieval peasants did dances like that as their main form of entertainment, it's wholesome.

For me one thing that has cheered me up lately is that I did two conferences in my profession that both were fun. I'd done conferences before, but they all sucked. I realized what the deal is with this stuff, if it's any good you go make friends and these friends are very casual, you won't even talk to them most of the time, but you see them at other conferences in the same way you'd go see a relative as a kid. You also make short-term friends, go enjoy this person's company even if you don't expect to ever talk to them again. It also helped me get past how jaded I was from my own workplace, where most people are hateful and cliquey office snakes. Things had been improving for me a lot on other fronts, and the conferences helped me to accept that it's not my profession that's broken, it's just the specific dickwads I work around and the environment they create.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

I feel like every single story of "I met my people/partner online" is 4-5 years old. Discord and group chat culture in general is inhuman, exclusive and unhealthy. And it's all we got. Set as invisible, post memes; 8 hours a day spent doing nothing of value.

To meet someone not actively engaging in 3 servers is a unicorn.

 

[Max Caulfield]

Same. But I don't believe there's a real solution to this problem as the effort required to improve yourself is also alienating.

If you're ronry and depressed and suffering some sad flavor of the /r9k/-mileu, taking the proverbial "first step of the thousand mile road" only further seperates you from everyone else. Because they'll never even try it.

Now imagine how alone you'll be if you win?

There's a lie sold my "successful" influencer types that money & body & charm get you sexy women and fairweather friends galore, but you need to remember they have these things because they come from money, not because they made it. They were given a body by world-class paid trainers, they didn't earn it for themselves. They're not actually charismatic, merely hyper-socialized. They are artificially elevated average people. Thus, they're palatable.

So it's important to remember that you were born alone, live alone and will die alone. You were lied to - sold during childhood an illusion of community, brotherood, comraderie. These things only exist in idealistic hollywood productions and the desperate hallucinations of the psychologically intoxicated. Life is not a Team Sport, it's a Free-For-All.

The way I look at it, you can give up and be dead inside, or go for the gold and be alone forever.
But you will never be happy.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

The logical thought is "Okay, quit all social media and live the way you wanna", but that's no better than those nutjobs who wanna life off-grid because they don't wanna pay taxes. You have to engage in SOME detrimental mainstream things to stay somewhat connected, and while dating apps are complete dogshit, I do live in an area where it's actually not all bad.

However, I've been suggested some girl talk youtube videos and one of them was like "girls, if you find you mans on a dating app in the last 5 years, you caught the last chopper out of 'Nam". There's 10 times as many dudes as women and no matter how well you vibe, the thing you meet about is.. love. You wanna date to date, not accidentally stumble onto someone who shares your passions. Think back to what 'gems' you've found on dating apps; they're there for a reason.

I'd love to bump into a nobody 6/10 brunette with ugly teeth in the park while on a walk, but what're the chances of that happening? Let alone finding an age peer who also tapped out of social media and shit? I watch romance movies to experience the sheer fantasy of 'I met someone and they became 70% of my daily doings'. Nah you text, mindgame and grift strangers until they get tired or you don't enjoy the chase anymore. To meet someone and itch to talk to them 24/7 is a luxury long gone now that we're socially overdosed with low-quality crap like Discord and IG.

I wouldn't say I'm lonely but I lack interest in the things that lead to community. If I truly burned for something I'd seek out any space exercising said thing. I don't wanna grift myself into enjoying something cause I know there's a somewhat active space for it somewhere.

 

[Vibralldo]

Hi Very Lonely, I'm Vibralldo

 

[Xavier Renegade Angel]

Gordon gecko said it best: you want a friend get a dog.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

I'd love to bump into a nobody 6/10 brunette with ugly teeth in the park while on a walk, but what're the chances of that happening? Let alone finding an age peer who also tapped out of social media and shit? I watch romance movies to experience the sheer fantasy of 'I met someone and they became 70% of my daily doings'. Nah you text, mindgame and grift strangers until they get tired or you don't enjoy the chase anymore. To meet someone and itch to talk to them 24/7 is a luxury long gone now that we're socially overdosed with low-quality crap like Discord and IG.

I get this sentiment 100%. It's demoralising to have potential relationships fall through because you aren't willing to return Instagram DMs sixteen hours a day, but it's not a productive way of socialising, and it turns you into a terribly dull person.

The way I see it, nothing worth doing is easy. Meeting people sucks now, but if our "old" methods of communication are actually better and more worthwhile -- which we know they are -- then all it'd take to bring that back is a critical mass of people ditching their smartphones. I fully believe that there'll someday be a wider-scale cultural backlash against social media and the like, and when that happens, it'll be the people who spent time honing their interpersonal skills in the real world who reap the biggest reward. What we need to do is sit tight and insist on meeting people face-to-face, even if it doesn't win us as many friends in the short term.

I wouldn't say I'm lonely but I lack interest in the things that lead to community. If I truly burned for something I'd seek out any space exercising said thing. I don't wanna grift myself into enjoying something cause I know there's a somewhat active space for it somewhere.

What are you interested in? What do you do with the extra time you gain from not dicking around on apps for half of your conscious life? There has to be something you can use to find people.

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

What are you interested in? What do you do with the extra time you gain from not dicking around on apps for half of your conscious life? There has to be something you can use to find people.

You'd think so. I made my friends in games so my go-to thoughts relate to this, but even just finding Europeans online is 1 in 20.

I don't feel strongly enough about anything to join a club and club culture in general here is reserved for kids and pensioners, not exactly where 30 year olds go for socializing. I also prefer being places for a reason, so volunteering would be ideal, but it's not a hobby.

I recently matched with someone mature and fitting, gunning for me HARD, but remove the innuendos and I realized we've nothing to talk about. I need actual passion behind things I do and joining a club to socialize feels dishonest.

I'll mop floors for free if it served a hobby I enjoyed. I need to take a chance but on fucking what.

 

[Gender: Xenomorph]

You'd think so. I made my friends in games so my go-to thoughts relate to this, but even just finding Europeans online is 1 in 20.

Games are no longer communities. You get thrown in with 20 random strangers that don't talk and you never get to see again. Very disheartening.

 

[seri0us]

many areas have groups about spirituality, culture or heritage that are always looking for volunteers.

All of those groups in my area that I can join are on watchlists from the SPLC

 

[Sharpeteer]

I stumbled upon this thread by looking at someone's profile out of curiosity, and saw they were looking at this thread. Lol

It's easy to fall into this trap of spending all your free time at home by yourself doing the same things, and getting comfortable this way, despite making the problem even worse. I think by even simply taking the time to go do something outside every day, I mean something that doesn't involve getting more food, you'll start to feel a lot less "claustrophobic" or trapped in your ways inside. Start going on runs, go on walks outside, hike up a mountain, or as others have said go lifting at the gym. Even if you're ugly (as you seem to have indicated), doing these things will make you feel a lot better about yourself. You can still do the stuff you like at home, but make time to do some sort of activity outside every day, and stick to it. Even if none of this gets you more friends, you will feel a lot better, and less like a doomer.

Although seeing as your account has been inactive since July 5th 2024, maybe you did these things already.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

Everyone is lonely now.

Everyone is isolated and lost watching the last vestiges of society crumble.

We are the last of a breed that is dying out and we can't find our kind.

There is no escaping this, the purgatorium we were put in does not allow communication with other beings, only the simulacrum of conversation.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

Everyone is lonely now.

Everyone is isolated and lost watching the last vestiges of society crumble.

We are the last of a breed that is dying out and we can't find our kind.

There is no escaping this, the purgatorium we were put in does not allow communication with other beings, only the simulacrum of conversation.

Most people have a healthy social life & society has been "crumbling" for as long as it has existed. It's not that bad.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

Most people have a healthy social life & society has been "crumbling" for as long as it has existed. It's not that bad.

It's never been falling like this. All bonds between white men and women are being severed. Major atomization and individualization has occurred, without anything to hold onto people are floating through the void of liminal nostalgia, unable to recognize why they can't stand the contemporary and why they are alone.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

It's never been falling like this. All bonds between white men and women are being severed.

& I bet you're going out and socialising with people to save the huwite race from extinction? Or are you scared of catching an evil Jewish brain fungus from talking to normies?

Given that this is, like, your entire gimmick, I'd think that you'd be able to doompost more creatively.

 

[Forsaken Wanderer]

& I bet you're going out and socialising with people to save the huwite race from extinction? Or are you scared of catching an evil Jewish brain fungus from talking to normies?

Given that this is, like, your entire gimmick, I'd think that you'd be able to doompost more creatively.

It's the entire gimmick of the NWO, install a Jewish leader such as Starmer or Zelenskyy and have them terrorize the white natives.

My own people have long since been turned into walking husks, there is nothing left to socialize with. I am one of the last of my kind, it's a lonely existence.

 

[Doktor Grimm]

My own people have long since been turned into walking husks, there is nothing left to socialize with. I am one of the last of my kind, it's a lonely existence.

What do you mean by "your kind"?

 

[GoysGoneWild]

Assuming you're a dude, joining a sport is most likely the first step to getting out of a rut like that. Ideally a team sport.

You don't have to be the best, and while it does help if you're not the worst, if you maintain good humor about it, people will still like you.

You can move into other things from there, but being out in the sun, doing athletic things, and bonding over shared goals and achievements is a pretty fundamental male psyche building block. Ignore it at your peril.