BIRTHDAY WEEK #2 + "BIG BIRTHDAY BASH" - Not just a mechanic in Say-kee-row

How much will Phil set his tip goal at?


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TL;DR Unless he had some kind of intestinal disease or surgery, it's alcoholism causing his Secondary Lactose Intolerance by causing his body to underproduce lactase. In many dairy derived foods the amount of pure milk sugar (lactose) is lower than the amount in milk causing people who have low production levels of the lactose digesting enzyme lactase (in Phil's case due to alcoholism) to be able to eat cheese without symptoms, but not able to drink milk.

That awkward moment when his shitty on-stream cake led to the confirmation he's the alcoholic we all knew him to be.
:stress:
 

TL;DR Unless he had some kind of intestinal disease or surgery, it's alcoholism causing his Secondary Lactose Intolerance by causing his body to underproduce lactase. In many dairy derived foods the amount of pure milk sugar (lactose) is lower than the amount in milk causing people who have low production levels of the lactose digesting enzyme lactase (in Phil's case due to alcoholism) to be able to eat cheese without symptoms, but not able to drink milk.

Basically if your body isn't able to handle the amount of lactose you put in it it won't get digested in the small intestine like normal and goes to your colon where it causes all the symptoms of Lactose Intolerance. In people with Primary Lactose Intolerance they don't produce any of the enzyme lactase and can't digest any lactose naturally, in people with Secondary Lactose Intolerance they can handle some and it's thought that if you can treat the underlying disorder (in Phil's case alcoholism) this will go away too.
So THAT'S what's wrong with me!

Good thing I prefer beer to mIlk.

Onward and upward to that ever-more elusive drunkenness!

EDIT: I was unaware, and am unappreciative of the auto-find and replace related to the lactation from cows.
 
715858

Birthday hypuu

Gotta be honest, I don't know anyone who just puts up decorations without having a party. Is this a thing? Or is this a Dave thing?
 
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The Goutstation has been decorated in preperation of the begathon. And no, that isn't ass sweat. That's the shadow of his micstand.
3 balloons and 2 strings of streamers. These are the decorations of a man who truly works his ass off.
"Now give me money and i'll blow into one of those horns. What's that? 37 why do you ask?"
 
3 balloons and 2 strings of streamers. These are the decorations of a man who truly works his ass off.
"Now give me money and i'll blow into one of those horns. What's that? 37 why do you ask?"
He's in fact not a children's entertainer and clowns around to attract little kids!... He just does it for his mentally handicapped own person.

With some :optimistic: it will went like one if his events of December, when he drank himself into depression because it always does it, rolled in his own pity and called the event a failure. The last honest self-realization I can remember.
It was just sad.
Then I laughed.
 
I think this is the first time I've seen a picture of the stained couch. And now I have even more questions.

  1. Is the chair literally right next to the door? And taking up the entire width of the room? How small is that room?
  2. Also, this room is the reason he can't move back to CT? He needs a tiny closet for his "office"?
  3. Wouldn't a gaming chair be BETTER for his "injured back"? Or at least an office chair with a back on it?
  4. How is that chair that stained in 5 years? Did he bring that chair with him from CT?
  5. I kind of knew it before, but does DSP really think that the sound foam is doing anything?

Edited for terrible formatting.
 
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Birthday hypuu

Gotta be honest, I don't know anyone who just puts up decorations without having a party. Is this a thing? Or is this a Dave thing?
I know this is suppose to be festive but I am getting a very sad vibe from this picture. And it will be even more sad wenn a nearly 40 year old friendless penniless streamer sits on that spot and starts begging.
 
I think this is the first time I've seen a picture of the stained couch. And now I have even more questions.

1) Is the chair literally right next to the door? And taking up the entirely width of the room? How small is that room?
1a) Also, this room is the reason he can't move back to CT? He needs a tiny closet for his "office"?
  1. Wouldn't a gaming chair be BETTER for his "injured back"? Or at least an office chair with a back on it?
  2. How is that chair that stained in 5 years? Did he bring that chair with him from CT?
  3. I kind of knew it before, but does DSP really think that the sound foam is doing anything?
Him not using an actual chair or over a couch for gaming is one of the biggest mysteries to dark for me. As someone who switched last year to playing games exclusively on my desktop I’m much more comfortable. He’s clearly blind as a bat and is constantly straining his eyes and hunching over to see the games.

My only conclusion is he’s the most pure form of a lazy man child, just looking at that couch he clearly doesn’t want to do anything but sit on a couch like a fat slob. Maybe sitting in a regular chair in front of a desktop gives him hot flashes of working a real job, I can only speculate.
 
That awkward moment when his shitty on-stream cake led to the confirmation he's the alcoholic we all knew him to be.
:stress:
Man, he is hungover every day. Dehydrated, stretching, looking like he's been up all night even though he gets up at like 10 or something (too lazy to convert timezones), his eyes hurt, goes to take a shit in the middle of pre-stream, late-night tweets begging for money or insulting someone.

There was a more sophisticated post about that in some thread but it's obvious he's sipping gin every night.
715944
 
I don’t know where this person is getting their info from but this wouldn’t surprise me. https://twitter.com/1080p200fps/status/1114109500926173184?s=21

"planning to ban the tax debt"

A shadowy group, a dark room, 6 figures dressed head to toe in deep red robes. 1 figure rises from a chair, the other 5 look at him silently.

"It is time" he begins in a high-pitched, almost child-like tone. "Time to ban the debt as well as the detractors" he finished.

Another arose, almost feminine in appearance other than height. "Get swagged on", came the nasally cry. The other 4 arose, whooping and hollering at his declaration.


Almost like some retarded masonic meeting. I love the idea of a group of people meeting in secret somewhere and discussing who'll give what. Hope to fuck this is just a bit of bait.
 
Yeah DSP's latest tweet about "having a very good feeling about tomorrow" probably means that these whales already have contacted him and informed him about their upcoming donations. Look at the bright side, another year of ridiculing Phil awaits us.
 
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