BIRTHDAY WEEK #2 + "BIG BIRTHDAY BASH" - Not just a mechanic in Say-kee-row

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How much will Phil set his tip goal at?

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Haunter

Haunter

Retired Staff
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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22 de Feb, 2018
(The first Birthday Week's thread is here.)

SPECIAL PAY PER VIEW EVENT:
DSP'S 36th 37th BIRTHDAY SPECIAL STREAMING WEEK
1st APRIL - 6th APRIL 2018 TO BE ANNOUNCED 2019

upload_2018-4-1_13-58-54.png
​

@Raven'sChild noted the first details to emerge

Raven'sChild dijo:
Another "Birthday WEEK" confirmed.
During today's prestream, D$P confirmed the return of last year's Birthday Week while discussing when would be the best time to go see his parents. He won't be visiting them during his 'Birthday Week' due to it being to lucrative a time not to stream. They advised he chose a time not near Easter due to an increase of people traveling/traffic. Amazingly as it may seem, this had not occurred to D$P, but on retrospect he did agree that he guessed traffic could be bad due to people traveling to visit their families or something. After Easter, however is a big game release that would be bad for the business for him to miss out on.
Presiona para expandir...

(The thread for his upcoming visit to his allegedly ailing parents is here.)

Like last year, Phil is again behind on his tax payments, and looking for ways to "raise funds" (there was of course the March marathon. A second marathon has been scheduled for the day before Birthday Weekday.)
711129

And like last year, the blame for the full week of celebrations has been placed on Kat. @Comma has clipped Phil's deflection in this post.

The next marathon will be a "BIG BIRTHDAY BASH", so the second marathon's thread has been merged into this one

The discussion of the April 5 Birthday stream begins on Page 8.

@flatsoda's provided a transcript of the Pre-Stream
flatsoda dijo:
04/05/19 Big Birthday Begging Bash Marathon Prestream: The Only Solution Is E-Begging

So!
We're starting off with Sekiro.
This is the game, everyone's loved watching me play over the last two weeks!
The Rage! The Salt!
BUT!
The fact that I'm PERSEVERING and enduring, and beating the incredibly challenging bosses and the like!
People have really enjoyed this playthrough!
Okay?
NOW!
A few things going on during today's Big Birthday Bash Marathon, I want to explain UP FRONT!
I'm explaining to all of you who are here now early.
PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS TO EVERYONE COMING LATER, because I'm sure they're going to be asking questions.
Okay?
First all all: YES! One of the primary reasons I'm doing this, is to fundraising via TIPS! To, to, to help-
To basically take care of my Tax Situation!
Alright?
The situation is THUS: I need to raise, a certain amount of money, in a very short amount of time! In order to, basically, qualify for a PAYMENT PLAN, so I don't get screwed over by back taxes!
Alright?
And, in reality, I waited until THIS MORNING, to set up the goals and everything!
Reason being? I spoke with my Tax Guy this morning.
I wanted a CONCRETE answer on stuff.
And what you see right now, on the bottom of your screen, is a TIPS BAR. That is based on what my Tax Guy told me!
*BOTTOM OF THE SCREEN HAS A PROGRESS BAR WITH A $5,000 GOAL TITLED: 'SMASH THE TAXES Tips Goal!'
He basically said, 'If you can raise this much money, alright? You will be good to go! You will qualify for the tax plan! Uhm. And. You know? You'll be set for the year!'
Okay?
Now, here's the thing!
If I don't raise this much today, is it the end of the world?
NO.
No matter what I raise today, it's good!
Because, no matter what I raise, it goes towards the taxes and it's gonna help!
BUT!
If I can raise this much, okay?
This is going to, basically, qualify me for the Tax Plan that will pay off these back taxes slowly!
And, it's the best situation possible!
Alright?
If i raise MORE THAN THIS, that's even better!!
That means I have some SURPLUS now! To help pay, the, the, you know, the tax payments that I'm gonna have to pay over the course of A FEW MONTHS.
Uhm.
In reality, do I expect to raise FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS in TIPS today?
No.
IT WOULD BE AMAZING! It would be, kind of like, 'WOW! Take a big weight off of my shoulders, if I did!'
I would be able to go to Connecticut, to spend time with my parents this week and not have it constantly nagging me in the back of my head, that when I come home, I'm going to have to deal with this giant fucking problem!
That's probably going to RUIN ME FINANCIALLY!
Uhm.
BUT!
I'm not seriously expecting-
SNIFF
Uh.
You know?
To raise that.
I'm just not!
Uhm.
It would, basically, BLOW ME AWAY, if I were to raise that much money in one day!
But, as you can see, we have the TIPS Bar at the bottom of the screen. This is going to continue to be there, over the course of today's stream.
Uhm.
WE are working towards the goal! And every little bit helps! Via TIPS!
Okay, guys?
Not to say, that I don't appreciate other contributions. I do!
But, today, the MAIN and PRIMARY GOAL, and the reason I'm doing this TWELVE HOURS STREAMING MARATHON, is to raise TIPS towards this goal!
Okay, guys?
So.
YES! The TIPS Bar is automatic!
Yes! It is filling up automatically!
I have this set up via Streamlabs.
I KNOW! I NEVER DO STUFF LIKE THIS!
And now, it's like, 'Oh my God! Is this actually working?!'
I got it working! Streamlabs is pretty damn good!
I have to say, 'Streamlabs: DOUBLE THUMBS UP!!'
Compared to Muxy, which, shhhwww, Muxy had stuff like this, and it never really worked properly. So I never bothered with it.
This is just working PERFECTLY.
Okay?
SNORT
LIP SMACK
So.
SIGH
Very good!
Okay?
This is what, so this is what WE'RE working towards today: TIPPING ME goes towards this TIPS GOAL!
If I can hit this TIPS Goal: I AM GOOD!
I'll qualify for the Tax Plan! I'll be okay!
You know?
At least, SHORT-TERM!
SMUG CHUCKLE
Everything will be good!
And, I'll be able to head to Connecticut, not feeling nervous, and not, you know, being all FUCKED IN THE HEAD!
Uh.
About this whole situation.
And that's why the goal is what it is!
I needed to know! And I didn't know what it was going to be, until I talked to my Tax Guy this morning! And told him what I've raised already and everything!
And he said, 'Alright! This is what's left! This is what you need to do!'
SO!
There you go, guys!
Okay?
Now!
This is The Big Birthday Bash! And what I'd like to show you guys- hold on a second, here.
Is what we've actually gotten set up here, in the office!
TURNS ON FACE CAM. LOOKS TERRIBLE
If you look behind me.
LEANS FORWARD TO THE RIGHT TO GET OUT OF THE WAY OF THE WEBCAM
POINTS TO THE WALL BEHIND HIM
THERE ARE TWO SAD ROWS OF PENNANT BANNERS HANGING FROM THE SQUARES OF ACOUSTIC FOAM THAT HE THINKS IS SOUNDPROOFING FOAM
I decorated my office for my birthday again, just like I did last year.
We got nice decorations behind me!
We got birthday ballons!
TWISTS HIS MISSHAPEN BODY AROUND TO GRAB A BALLOON SITTING ON THE BACK OF THE COUCH
All around the place!
GRABS ANOTHER BALLOON THAT WAS SITTING ON THE COUCH TO HIS RIGHT
HOLDS UP THE BALLOON TO THE CAMERA
Right?
HITS THE BALLOON FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON
Pretty cool!
AND!
Every time that a BIG CONTRIBUTION comes in.
Alright?
I have party horns and stuff that I can play!
HOLDS UP PARTY HORN
BLOWS INTO PARTY HORN
NOT A CLOWN, BTW
To celebrate!
Alright?
Now, people have said,
MOCKING VOICE
'Well! If a Big Contribution comes in, will you dab or whatever?'
Uh.
FLAPS NOODLE ARMS AROUND
Sure!
HAND CLAP
Whatever you guys want!
I'm in a situation here, where I just want to have a really great POSITIVE stream here today!
I'm incredibly grateful for what you guys contribute!
So, whatever it is that you would want!
FAKE CHUCKLE
You know what I mean?
For contributions, I am happy about that!
Okay?
LIP SMACK!
Uhm.
So.
T-POSE
Yeah!
We're going to have this, kind of, festive atmosphere all day long!
Keep in mind: Sekiro, I'm probably going to be super-intense on the game!
But, yeah!
I'll be taking, uh, time away from the game to thank all of you for all of your contributions!
Uhm.
The good news is: I don't have to update Total TIPS! Because I have a TIPS Bar that's going to be tracking it for me!
So, I actually,
RAISES HIS HANDS UP TO JESUS
Don't Have To Do That, Today!!
HAND CLAP
Which is great!
Uh.
I can just, kind of, focus on the games and interactions with you guys, than constantly updating the leader board! Or anything like that.
TAKES A SIP OF SELTZER WATER
CHEWS HIS SELTZER WATER
LIP SMACK!
So.
TURNS HIS MISSHAPEN BODY TO THE RIGHT
GLARES AT THIS LAPTOP
Yeah!
TURNS OFF FACECAM
The whole thing is, a cool festive vibe!
Decorations!
Party horns!
Big, uh, you know, BAR, to, to, to, to track what WE'RE raising!
And, you know?
I'm feeling good! I am!
I have a really good feeling about this!
I do!
I have had people say, that, you know, they've been waiting for this!
Uhm.
It is, you know, MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW. F.Y.I.
Because, some people have actually asked me, 'Will you be eating a piece of birthday cake on stream?'
Well! Maybe tomorrow!
Because, actually, Kat and I bought a VERY, VERY SMALL
FAKE CHUCKLE
Uh.
Birthday cake!
At the grocery store.
Because, I said, 'You know? I loved-'
Last year, she made me this AMAZING chocolate and peanut butter cake!
But, it took me like two weeks to finish it!
And I was like, 'I don't want that this year! Because we're not going to be here!'
HITS MICROPHONE BECAUSE HE'S A DERANGED ANIMAL IN BEGGING MODE
Keep in mind, guys: Sunday, I'm not here anymore!
I'm going to explain that in a moment. I'll explain the schedule!
Uhm.
But, yeah, we're not going to be here!
We're going to be in Connecticut for a week!
So, what's the point of making a cake, if you have a day to eat it?!
Right?
So I said, 'We'll just go, you know, if we're going to do something, we'll just grab something quickly!'
So this really SMALL cake, we just grabbed!
Like, TINY LITTLE MIDGET CAKE!
ITTY BITTY!
And, uh, it's enough for like one piece each!
So, we're gonna
SMUG CHUCKLE
We're gonna- may do that on stream tomorrow.
We'll see.
Okay?
LIP SMACK!
Uhm.
So.
Yeah!
SIGH
Really, really, you know, really GOOD VIBES about today!
I'm feeling very positive! Very good about it!
I hope you guys are, as well.
Uhm.
Again, I want to say, thanks to anyone who's here, just early enough, and anyone who joins me over the course of today.
It's much, much appreciated!
If you're watching this On Demand on YouTube, because a lot of people watch this as a prestream on YouTube.
YOU CAN STILL CONTRIBUTE.
There's a link in the description of the video, to leave a tip.
THAT'S HOW YOU CAN HELP!
Obviously, it won't track on the bar here. Because, by the time you see this video on YouTube, the marathon is over!
BUT IT WILL STILL HELP ME!
Okay!
Anything, any TIPS I receive are going to help me with this Tax Situation!
Okay?
Then, on Sunday, I am out of here!
I'm on my way to Connecticut!
Kat and I will be flying across the country!
And spending, you know, about FIVE STRAIGHT DAYS, uh, with my, with my parents!
Doing stuff!
And also, I'll be spending time with Kat around Connecticut. Showing her around the places I used to hang out! And places I used to work!
Basically, having some fun with her and getting some decompression time!
Because we don't get any!!
We seriously don't!
The one day a week, that we get off, is running around, doing errands and stuff!
And, even though, it's fun having a day away from streaming!
Don't get me wrong!
We never really get time to ourselves! To just be with each other and have fun!
Instead, it's more like, 'Well! We have time away, and now we have to do other stuff that needs to get done!'
And, it, it does get VERY FRUSTRATING!
So, we are going to FINALLY have some time to just, kind of, relax!
And spend it with the parents!
And, and, and go around Connecticut, and doing, you know, hopefully fun stuff!
Uh.
By the way.
I should bring this up.
For those who will criticize, 'How is Phil going on a trip, if he needs money for taxes?'
I'm not paying for the trip! My parents are!
This is a situation where my parents are getting older. They're having health problems.
They can't even fly out to visit me anymore!
And they want to see me. They want to meet Kat! Obviously!
CONDESCENDING CHUCKLE
Who I've lived with for over a year!
Uhm.
LIP SMACK!
And the way my mom put it, which is probably the best way to put it!
Better that Kat and I go visit them now.
Alright?
While my parents are not in HORRENDOUS health!
So that we can have some fun together! We can talk with each other! We can have meals together and everything!
Before, you know, maybe in a couple of more years time, something bad goes wrong with my parents. And I have to go out there for BAD REASONS!
You know what I mean?
Like, someone's on their DEATHBED or something!
Obviously. Knock on wood.
KNOCKS ON HIS TABLE
Please don't let that happen anytime soon.
Uhm.
But, I totally agree with my mom's reasoning.
Why not have this happen now? Rather than later?
And that way, you know, we have these nice happy memories.
You know?
To remember.
Versus, 'Oh! The first time Kat met my parents, something horrible was going on!'
You see what I mean?
So.
SNIFF
Yeah!
I'm going out there.
And.
You know?
I realize this is kind of bad timing. Because of everything going on with my taxes, and everything.
You know what, though?
IT'S MORE IMPORTANT.
Being very frank and honest with all of you.
My parents are more important.
Kat meeting my parents is more important.
Than me being here for the next week and raising funds for taxes!
Even though, I need to!
And I may lose my house this year, if I can't raise funds for taxes!
Uh.
I have to.
I have to see my parents!
This, this TIMING was in line with THEIR schedule and everything too!
HAND CLAP
You know, my dad's work schedule and everything!
I had to make sure that it was all in line.
That's why I'm going this week!
Okay?
Uhm.
So It Is What It Is.
I will not be here starting Sunday. And I will be back, uh, at the end of the week.
Okay?
So, the way it's going to work is: NO NEW STREAMS ALL WEEK!
I'm not going to be here!
I can't stream!
And, NO!
I've said MANY, MANY TIMES already!
THIS TRIP IS NOT ABOUT ME DOING WORK!
It's the opposite!
It's supposed to be about me UNPLUGGING FROM WORK!
Spending time with THE PARENTS.
Having Kat meet my parents!
And just us, having - RELAXATION TIME!
Peace of mind, AWAY FROM HERE!
That's why, honestly, I said, 'If I could raise A LOT TODAY, via TIPS! It would take my mind off of all this shit!'
And not have to be worrying constantly in the back of my mind, that things are going to fall apart!
Right?
Uhm.
And that's why it would be awesome!
So.
So, let's see how it goes today.
And hopefully, this will allow me to ENJOY THE WEEK, and not be crazily, in the back of my mind, always having this thing nagging at me!
Right?
So, anyway.
Yeah.
It's going to be a great session today.
I'm, I'm very appreciative for ANY CONTRIBUTIONS, that any of you give me!
Alright?
ANYTHING!
You know?
I don't look a gift horse in the mouth!
HOWEVER!
If you absolutely want to help me the most!
PLEASE TIP ME TODAY!!
These TIPS are going towards the taxes!
They're going to allow me to, HOPEFULLY, get this payment plan! And qualify for it!
And, therefore, be actually able to handle these back taxes.
If I can't qualify for the payment plan, I'm basically screwed and have to sell my house this year!
THERE'S NO OTHER WAY AROUND IT!
Okay?
So.
PLEASE!
TIP ME IF YOU CAN!

Explains how to send his greasy ass a tip.

Please consider it guys!
It's the best way to contribute!
I still appreciate cheering and subbing!
Uh.
Today!
And I'm sure we're going to have cheering and subbing today!
Uhm.
But!
That's going to help me more long-term! While short-term, I really need these help with the taxes!
Alright?



Maybe it would have been nice to take some of Kat's DELICIOUS and MOIST birthday cake to Connecticut, and share it with DarkSydeDad and DarkSydeMom.
Maybe it would've been nice to celebrate DSP's birthday with his parents, who are funding his pre-tax day vacation, in a small way like that.
Maybe it would have been a good way for Kat to make a good impression on DarkSydeDad and DarkSydeMom, if she brought them some of THE BEST BIRTHDAY CAKE DSP has ever eaten. Especially since they're paying to fly her in.
But SmallHandsPhil is too selfish and shortsighted to think of something like that.
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@Comma's put together a very nice montage of Phil's "rather salty MW Remastered gameplay" ("Uploaded it to Youtube due to the file size/upload limitations."

The marathon served as an unexpected send off to Modern Warfare with its angry eradication from Phil's console (Thanks to "pigxdestroyer" on Twitter for getting the clip, and @LyteSydeByll for pointing it out.)

Again, Comma's shored up another of my OPs by putting together this timeline of the stream

GREEN = actual gameplay
PURPLE = breaks
RED = downtime (not playing a game, including breaks)

Times are in PDT
_
10:00 AM - (...)
10:05 AM - starting broadcast (music)
10:31 AM - starting pre-stream
11:33 AM - starting Sekiro
01:40 AM - pausing Sekiro
01:40 PM - break ("20 mins")
02:05 PM - return from break (actual break time: 25 mins)
02:05 PM - talking + shout outs + explaining how to tip
02:10 PM - resuming Sekiro
03:56 PM - ending Sekiro
03:56 PM - talking + shout outs etc.
03:59 PM - beak ("30 mins")
04:37 PM - return from break (actual break time: 38 mins)
04:37 PM - talking + shout outs etc.
04:43 PM - starting MLB The Show
06:01 PM - ending MLB The Show
06:01 PM - talking
06:02 PM - break ("20 mins")
06:29 PM - return from break (actual break time: 27 mins)
06:29 PM - talking
06:32 PM - starting CoD: MW Remastered
07:36 PM - rage quit CoD: MW Remastered
07:36 PM - talking
07:38 PM - break ("15 mins")
08:03 PM - return from break (actual break time: 25 mins)
08:03 PM - talking
08:06 PM - starting Black Ops 4 Blackout
09:51 PM - ending Black Ops 4 Blackout
09:51 PM - talking
09:52 PM - break ("5 to 10 mins")
10:06 PM - return from break (actual break time: 14 mins)
10:06 PM - dead air (messing around with the overlay)
10:09 PM - starting Q&A segment
10:33 PM - end of stream
_

Total stream duration [10 AM to 10:33 PM]: 753 minutes [12 hours and 33 minutes]

Total actual gameplay: 63.75% of total time (480 minutes) [8 hours and 0 minutes]
Total downtime: 36.25% of total time (273 minutes) [4 hours and 33 minutes]
Total break time: 17.13% of total time (129 minutes) [2 hours and 9 minutes]

And KangarooPissSpray has a breakdown of what Phil approximately pulled in post-fees
KangarooPissSpray dijo:
Some very early morning off the back of the envelope calculations but let’s try to give a guesstimate of how much was made after fees for dark.
$930 from the top 10 cucks we’ll call it in 14 donations (too overestimate fees) to get that $930 from the top 10. Total tips were a few cents shy of $1,320 so we’ll round that nice and even. That gives us a remainder of $390 from the non whale level cucks now let’s say that was over 186 (way overshooting) donations for an average of aprox. $2 per for the non whales. Now we have 200 estimated transactions, at $.30 per transaction for PayPal fees that’d be $60 (once again being very generous). Now that leaves us with the 3% gross fee of $1,320 for $39.60 subtracting that we get $1,280.40, now taking away the $60 in trans. Fees and we’re down to $1,220.40 so we’ll just call it dark made a guesstimate of $1,220 for the “marathon tax smashing session”.


Edit to add feel free to correct me but I’m pretty sure I’m in the ballpark but I’ll defer to @actually acktual tally.
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The "marathon" was followed by a half-day (his birthday proper)
717340

(Screengrab courtesy of @kebab4you.)

And the day after that marks the start of his week-long sojourn to Connecticut.
 
Última edición:
SoapQueen1 dijo:
I can't wait for him to eat two bites of cake and set the plate in the hallway on the floor like a fucking Sim again.
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no fkin way, did he?

and oh for sure. either its gonna be kat made it or bought it, and if kat made it its going to be some premade shit from a box. add water and eggs and fkin tada

all i remember from birthday week is that annoying ass thing, phil. and that other little thing he blow into
 
SoapQueen1 dijo:
Yeah he didn't want the smell of the cake to distract him. I'm not kidding. He took a couple bites (immediately taking a drink of water after each bite because it was obviously disgusting) then set the plate in the hall for Kat to pick up.
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Honestly anyway you cut that isn’t a good look let’s break down some scenarios.
1) Phil’s self control is so terrible that having the smell of the cake in the room would be too tempting for him to drag his ass downstairs to get his 2nd helping.

2) The cake was as repulsive as it looked from his reactions eating it and he was disgusted by the smell

3) He’s too lazy to take his ass downstairs and throw the shit away and take his piss break while he’s at it so his boomer bladder wouldn’t interrupt the stream later on.

Or a combination of the above.

Another autistic thought, does he not have a trash can in his office?
 
samovski dijo:
Well, surely it can't be worse than last year. Failed to reach his much needed goal (surprisingly nothing came of this massive miss), a sad bitter rant about Reeanna, John and Howard. Fleeing from a 2k+ host and apparently orgasming from a cake his girl most definitely made.

I look forward to this arc of the show.
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She 'made' the cake. It was a Pintrest peanutbutter cup pokecake which is a baked Betty Crocker boxed cake mix in a baking pan that one 'pokes' holes in and then pours chocolate syrup over, topping it with a (" custom"~D$P) peanutbutter & coolwhip icing, "a classy candy" aka chopped up mini peanutbutter cups with more chocolate syrup drizzled on top.*
*https://www.instagram.com/p/BhP43QCAP_y/ In said photo, looks like she omitted the coolwhip and spread straight peanut butter on the cake. No electric hand mixer?
**https://www.pinterest.com/pin/AX_CwWdOXJfr9DO3Bt68Fu9UZgtoRl3xRmJ1eGkVjrfe6luPsw9LLB8/
*** https://www.bettycrocker.com/recipe...oke-cake/6c878f1b-d30c-4cc2-aed1-f56130ada084
 
Última edición:
Pointandlaugh dijo:
I'm surprised she didn't poison him... maybe this year. He'll definitely decorate his office for his birthday week. He probably want his parents to give him money as always. The begging pity party will be non stop.
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Khet decorated the office last year. I also don't see any b'day doubloons from daddy as the man is footing the bill to fly philbert and Miss Ed out for a visit to his 'deathbed', plus hotel and rental car. Zoo admission may be included, but this is an unknown. It was said to be an 'all expense paid visit', so entertainment and dinning may also be itemized into the visit proposal per diem prior to agreeing upon leaving the WahKhando.
 
Oh man, already?! Feels like his last week-long Sweet Sixteen Tantrum Party was just a few days ago! Hooray I can't wait to never watch a minute of this unless he gives us the birthday gift of one of his banner, trademark, limpwristed chimpouts!
 
Sparkletor dijo:
What is your guys' problem!?

That was the best cake Phil has ever had in his life. And he has even had real authentic Italian birthday cake from the authentic Italian bakery in Connecticut.
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Yeah and the way he was guzzling down that water after every bite I’m guess it was the best water he’s ever had in his life
 
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