The Super Best Friends Super Best Griefing Thread - Matt's a cuck, Liam is a bitch, Pat's a loony and Woolie's Way is now trademarked

[DEBIRU MAN]

Pat and Paige obviously don't regulate their own behaviors around the child, so why would the child do the same for them? Sounds like the kid talks exactly how they do on their streams.

Even worse, Paige explicitly shows Pat's streams to the kid as a distraction. So every cashout Pat has is burned into his retinas, and will be how that kid sees a normal person act in the real world.

 

[Gas Snake]

Even worse, Paige explicitly shows Pat's streams to the kid as a distraction.

Oh good, so Pat's self-loathing will be passed on. The family line of bitter, nihilistic, wife-fearing ginger men remains unbroken.

 

[Tanner Glass]

Pat is explicitly trying to get into FFXIV media tour so he can be a licensed FFXIV content creator.
Pat plans on doing more content with the Grinding Gears guys. Pat's audience is apparently very happy that Pat is branching out with more content creators.

Pat (and I can't believe I'm saying this) is actually being a true bro for Woolie and is drip feeding him one of the easiest "break in case of emergency" streams in an effort to actually help Woolie out of his slump. The "new player goes through the story" is generally the only FFXIV content that the FFXIV audience likes so Pat is right that this is a good time to strike as it's the slow part of the game for all current players (I know he didn't say that, but, maybe he's not a complete retard).

Called that one. Really pretty sad the one time Pat starts acting like a friend to Woolie and does things his audience wants, it's entirely self-serving.

One major thing that's worth thinking about is why was Pat not already on the media tour? Despite the fact he's garbage, he's a much larger streamer then pretty much everyone else currently on the media tour - by a significant margin. FFXIV is happy to include much smaller streamers and much larger ones (even Asmongold got onto the media tour at one point). A lot of the bigger streamers aren't FFXIV streamers exclusively so it is a really weird exclusion if he's ever reached out to them.

I do wonder if he was put on a short list of people who did a bad job for the SBFP FFXIV sponsored video they did a long while back. With everyone but Pat sandbagging in the video.

 

[KingofSomething]

• Pat has been referencing Diet Cokes as "Fridge Cigarettes" and how Pat's kid won't stop asking for cigarettes from his parents. It is now on the naughty words list, along with screaming "Fuck" at the top of his lungs. He also asks "What the Fuck?" when he does something wrong.
• Pat's son screams that he wants to "Get hit by a car" whenever he's a parking lot. Pat's kid thinks this is funny.
• Pat thinks his son is so much smarter than other kids but is using this talent to torture him. Pat's kid thinks Pat looks gross and asks him to wear a shirt.
• Pat's kid thinks Paige looks too bad to wear a swimsuit.
• Pat's son doesn't want to be fat like his parents.

The open disrespect this kid has for his parents is kinda funny, but the lack of discipline is concerning.

 

[Aaron Costello]

"We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas"

But seriously, what the fuck does Paige do? There's 24 hours in a day no matter how you slice it, she's gotta spend them somehow. It can't be with the kid, because then they wouldn't need a full-time nanny. She sure as fuck isn't doing any other housewife shit like cleaning, doing the shopping, cooking meals, etc. She doesn't exactly stream herself with any regularity, so what is she spending all that time doing? Is she literally just on her phone, trawling bluesky for shit to stir? What does the Paige do? Clearly it must be keeping her busy as hell.

I just remembered that Pat and Paige went to the local nerd shop and played dnd and almost ruined that friendship group.
I wonder if they have tried to play DnD or Magic ever since. Do you think word spread and they all got blacklisted from all the nerd groups in BC?

 

[Tetsuya Nomura]

Do you think word spread and they all got blacklisted from all the nerd groups in BC?

Between this and Pat getting attacked that one time (punched at a con, I think?), along with how Pat and Paige behaved around Clemps that one time in 2018 on stream (Pat touching Clemps' abs unsolicited), and knowing Paige was fuckin around with Dick Masterson, these two give off weirdo swinger vibes who don't understand others' boundaries at all.

Them having a kid is genuinely awful to think about. But for such seemingly boring shits, every time I frequent this thread I'm inundated with even more weird shit I didn't know about them, because they themselves have blurted it out to the internet.

If I grew up to find out my father was frequently telling embarrassing stories about my childhood on a podcast when I was a child, I'd disown him. Then again, If my father was a fucking ginger dwarf and my mother was an equally ginger lupus lady then I'd probably be too busy on the incel forums talkin about eugenics.

 

[08903248752]

• Pat has been referencing Diet Cokes as "Fridge Cigarettes" and how Pat's kid won't stop asking for cigarettes from his parents. It is now on the naughty words list, along with screaming "Fuck" at the top of his lungs. He also asks "What the Fuck?" when he does something wrong.
• Pat's son screams that he wants to "Get hit by a car" whenever he's a parking lot. Pat's kid thinks this is funny.
• Pat thinks his son is so much smarter than other kids but is using this talent to torture him. Pat's kid thinks Pat looks gross and asks him to wear a shirt.
• Pat's kid thinks Paige looks too bad to wear a swimsuit.
• Pat's son doesn't want to be fat like his parents.

This is so sad. A parent's job is to model healthy behavior and gently guide and teach their child all the emotional and physical skills required to be a healthy adult.


Instead, it's abundantly clear that due to having two extremely emotionally immature parents, he's already having to take on the role of "providing" (in this case, entertainment) to his parents, inverting the parent-child dynamic.

All the "my kid is so weird and funny and quirky" stuff is bullshit. Kids do what they're taught and what gets rewarded. If the child says outlandish stuff, it's because it's what the parents are saying, and by them saying it they get whatever they're being deprived of from their caregivers, like attention or affection.

The kid isn't getting tortured because he's "smarter than the other kids", it's because his parents have completely and utterly failed him as parents. Shit like looking in their eyes, helping them co-regulate emotions, mirroring healthy behaviors for them, not fucking encouraging being an abrasive prick like their parents.


These niggers have no external life stressors, there is literally zero reason other than their own emotional immaturity to be failing their child so badly. Tophat me, but kids are innocent and this sort of shit pisses me off.

The open disrespect this kid has for his parents is kinda funny, but the lack of discipline is concerning.

I doubt his shithead parents are doing much to model a healthy relationship dynamic in front of him, and "discipline" is pointless because the only reason a kid does stuff like this is because it's what's modeled to them, and what is rewarded. When your parents have their faces buried in their phones and deprive a child of the attention they need, if saying abrasive shit is rewarded with laughter, or even just causes them to engage with them, even negatively, it's what is being taught and re-enforced to the child as what is necessary to get their needs met.

 

[Flopper]

This is so sad. A parent's job is to model healthy behavior and gently guide and teach their child all the emotional and physical skills required to be a healthy adult.

This wasn't going to happen because both parents are mentally immature and compromised in many aspects, the kid never stood a chance.

 

[08903248752]

This wasn't going to happen because both parents are mentally immature and compromised in many aspects, the kid never stood a chance.

I know... I just wish people like them didn't have children.

They literally tick every box. I feel sorry for their child.

 

[Shartavius]

The Boivins believe that ticking every box on that "emotionally stunted" list is their brand.

Does anyone else remember when Paige was asked about the prospect of the two of them having a child during a Pat stream years prior to their move to BC?

Her answer was a series of disclaimers: How, what with her chronic health issues, it would be dangerous for her and the child to carry a pregnancy to term. Additionally, she was such a "private" person and, specifically, so opposed to the distasteful practice of Internet personalities exploiting the existence of their children for content, that she would prefer the audience not know they even had a child until it accidentally walked into the room during a stream in ten years?

What happened? If we're to ignore the conspicuous factors (e.g., that the temptation to buy dependents as begging props kept in the room during streams was too great, that Paige is even lazier than Pat when it comes to generating an income, or that Pat would insist on making Castle Super Beast the babycast for the sake of complaining how expensive retaining a full-time nanny for their Barbie Dream Mansion in their expensive Province is), what other factors would cause the Boivins to renege on those ideals?

 

[Living Failure]

what other factors would cause the Boivins to renege on those ideals?

My money is on them just never having had those ideals in the first place. They're performative in everything they do and say, so why not this?

 

[Shartavius]

They're performative in everything they do and say, so why not this?

She had no reason to lie when she said a pregnancy would be too risky, or implied she wouldn't want Pat's parasocial audience to even know they have a child. She had/has good reason to claim these things - Bear in mind, attention-starved Paige claimed on Twitter that one of Pat's deranged "fans" spent a good chunk of time emailing them criminal threats about cutting off their infant son's dick.

Given she got pregnant anyway, then they talked about their son every stream since he was born, it seems less like Paige specifically lied about the matter; and more that she's too mentally retarded to keep things on track.

 

[Living Failure]

She had no reason to lie when she said a pregnancy would be too risky, or implied she wouldn't want Pat's parasocial audience to even know they have a child.

Oh no, I'm not saying they lied per se, because a lie would be a conscious falsehood told against better knowledge or judgment, whereas I think their performative manner is purely subconscious and reflexive. I'm saying that their beliefs are whatever they think looks good at the time, or provides some entertainment value. I believe Pat and Paige are so deep in that millenial generational disease of detached irony that they're essentially unable to hold a genuine opinion. It's either discarded at the first sign of pushback and played off as a joke, deeply disingenuous from the start, or simply whatever they think their audience wants to hear. So I think that when Paige said these things, she meant them about as much as she can mean anything, but it was still performative, because it's also clearly what sounds good to say in that moment.

Later, it became more opportune to play the family man angle, so they switched tracks to milking that baby for all it's worth. If pressed, they'll probably handwave it like every other opinion they once "held" with some vague explanation about how they checked with a doctor and decided it's fine or whatever.

 

[Shartavius]

I believe Pat and Paige or so deep in that millenial generational disease of detached irony that they're essentially unable to hold a genuine opinion.

Ah - the next stage of the Mike Stoklasa disease. I agree that both of the Boivins seem to just say any old shit for the sake of filling time, and then forget they said it. But I'm still hoping there ends up being more to the story, even if it's just Pat's failure to emulate some other Youtuber who had a child.

 

[Sexy Potoo]

Pat's kid thinks Pat looks gross and asks him to wear a shirt.
Pat's kid thinks Paige looks too bad to wear a swimsuit.
Pat's son doesn't want to be fat like his parents.

Against all odds, is Pat's son going to grow up based?

 

[Tanner Glass]

What happened? If we're to ignore the conspicuous factors (e.g., that the temptation to buy dependents as begging props kept in the room during streams was too great, that Paige is even lazier than Pat when it comes to generating an income, or that Pat would insist on making Castle Super Beast the babycast for the sake of complaining how expensive retaining a full-time nanny for their Barbie Dream Mansion in their expensive Province is), what other factors would cause the Boivins to renege on those ideals?

It's (my guess) that Paige thought she was just going to die young because of all the health issues and now that she's coming up on 40 thought "well I guess not". It was often bandied about as a reason for Paige to not get too serious in her relationship and why (outwardly) she initially didn't want to get married to Pat.

 

[Crab Zone]

The Boivins believe that ticking every box on that "emotionally stunted" list is their brand.

Does anyone else remember when Paige was asked about the prospect of the two of them having a child during a Pat stream years prior to their move to BC?

Her answer was a series of disclaimers: How, what with her chronic health issues, it would be dangerous for her and the child to carry a pregnancy to term. Additionally, she was such a "private" person and, specifically, so opposed to the distasteful practice of Internet personalities exploiting the existence of their children for content, that she would prefer the audience not know they even had a child until it accidentally walked into the room during a stream in ten years?

What happened? If we're to ignore the conspicuous factors (e.g., that the temptation to buy dependents as begging props kept in the room during streams was too great, that Paige is even lazier than Pat when it comes to generating an income, or that Pat would insist on making Castle Super Beast the babycast for the sake of complaining how expensive retaining a full-time nanny for their Barbie Dream Mansion in their expensive Province is), what other factors would cause the Boivins to renege on those ideals?

I am willing to give Paige the benefit of the doubt that with her health issues there were genuine concerns about what pregnancy could do to her and potential dangers to the baby. She may have been re-evaluated or been given some good medical advice saying she can have a baby but theres specific things she needs to avoid doing while pregnant and maybe a specialist doctor to see.

 

[Jay Jay]

You know, I think I've finally pinned down why Woolie pisses me off more than Pat. It's because he just drifts through life following the Woolie Way™ without even caring, and reacts with utter contempt to anyone trying to show him something else.

Say what you want about Pat - and I have, and I will - but at least he does things with intent! Sure, he's selling out to try to get on the FFXIV circuit, but that's a choice he's making. Pat has lazy subathon goals that really don't take much effort to do at all, but at least he's deciding on stuff like that. He's making poor decisions about how he's raising his kid, but he's actually making choices about how he's raising his kid. And because he's making choices, he makes a good one once in a blue moon. Those Bioshock Infinite streams Pat did last year were actually pretty good, whereas I think the last thing I watched from Woolie was Hi-Fi Rush - and even then I could only stomach the highlight reel. Don't know if he's backtracked on it (haven't tuned in to Pat in a while, lmao), but last I heard he was going to try to raise his son bilingual in English and French, which is good! There are about a squintillion studies about how that helps kids. When he and Paige moved, they specifically moved into a place with a big yard for the future kid and Zangief, as well as a side building for the stream setup so the baby wouldn't interrupt.

In contrast, look at Woolie, who moved either immediately before or soon after his daughter was born, and didn't even think about any of that, resulting in her audibly crying on podcasts and streams. Woolie compares his daughter's needs to fighting game meters because it's literally the only point of reference he has to anything, causing even Pat to justly tell him that he sounds fucking insane. Dozens of people line up to welcome him to Eorzea, and this dipshit can only react with bitterness and ask how to turn all their happiness off. He's just going along the Woolie Way™ utterly resistant to anything else, hoping that one day fighting games will take off again and he'll be the king of the FGC for showing off a hundred half-similar obscure games. Motherfucker, fighting games are DEAD! Tekken and Street Fighter aren't gonna save them, anyone trying to learn now is gonna have to go up against people who have been playing Kazuma and Ryu for decades! 2XKO could have given it a few more years, but the Cannon brothers gave it a shitty name, made it a tag fighter, and then balanced it like ass - and if the fucking League fighting game failed for being a 2v2 tag fighter, Marvel Tokon isn't gonna bring in new blood with a goddamn 4v4! And I'm sorry Pat, but you are literally the last person on Earth who gives a shit about Virtua Fighter.

Woolie just utterly refuses to acknowledge reality, and he's just chugging along the Woolie Way™ upset that his one autistic interest isn't shared by the entire world. Pat might be a piece of shit, but I respect him so much more than Woolie for actually making choices, even if they're usually the wrong ones.

 

[Gas Snake]

I tried catching up on the FF14 LP but it's really rough. I stopped before the Ifrit fight, but I don't need to see it to understand the reports. I was gonna do a whole write-up, but that would be putting in more effort than Woolie has done the entire LP. So I'll just list some scattered thoughts and funny moments:

• The LP gets 'better' because there's substantially less bitching about Parasocials after the first stream. Of course this is because most of the audience has left, and nevertheless Woolie doesn't miss a chance to deliver a snide remark when he can. Pat also literally yells at people who stand too close to Woolie LMFAO
  
  
• Related to above, but the last remaining Parasocials have begun to roleplay in story locations ahead of Woolie's arrival in hopes of not angering their prickly master. He and Pat still find a way to insult them for it.
  
  
• Woolie has awful reaction time (this is known) in dungeons, like dial-up level response to dynamism. Despite using a controller, he still manages to play as if he were chicken-pecking a keyboard.
  
  
• "Hey do you remember FF16? This kind of looks like FF16. Whoa is that like the nigger cattle from FF16? I bet this guy's racist just like FF16! Ugh, this looked cooler in FF16."
  
  
• Literally the only joy Woolie ever expresses during the FF14 streams was from the fanart people made for him. A slight crack in his blackened, chemical-soaked heart appears.
  
  
• Reggie slips and gives away the game here-
  W: "Yo the Jo Guns art is a pretty big incentive."
  R: "You have to keep it going."
  W: "It's pretty cool."
  R: "You have to milk it."
  W: "Yeah. Yeah..."
  
  
• Just a screenshot of Pat literally fanning Woolie like a slave boi while Woolie was pea-princessing the party for the perfect screenshot that I found funny.

EDIT: Almost forgot a VERY DEMENTED exchange that I wish I could remember where it was to link to, but the gist is it starts with Pat responding to a chatter:

Chatter: "I think it still might be good for Woolie if he tried to party with randoms just to see what its like."
Pat: "*reads chatter message* THAT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA."
Woolie: "Oh are you trying to set me up? Because if you want me to stop playing, thats the fastest way to do it. I would rather party up with the NPCs than ever debase myself into random queue (like a peasant!)."
Pat: "Woolie you are totally right. I once had a bad experience in a random queue, therefore, you should absolutely never random queue. Now please hold onto my hand, we're going into Halatali."

 

[Living Failure]

he's just chugging along the Woolie Way™ upset that his one autistic interest isn't shared by the entire world

Which is only made infinitely funnier by Woolie being a literal who in the FGC, with no clout, no achievements, no reputation, no nothing. Seriously, does anyone who's anyone in the community even know his name as a fighting game guy, i.e. does he have any presence that isn't basically cronyism carried by long-faded TBFP fame? Seriously, why pick a horse for this race, when the horse doesn't even acknowledge your existence.

You know what Woolie's weird fucking existence and extreme contrarianism could have been good for? Playing gaming classics from a modern perspective for the first time. The dude has ducked games like Half Life, Soul Reaver, and who knows how many other milestones out of sheer Woolie-Wayism, he could've milked the hell out of playing games too clunky for Gen Z, playing them fresh, see what holds up, show why they're these titans. But he managed to fuck even that up royally.