random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Spectate]

so i just end up jerking off to Japanese gravure models to cope. I really like Ai Yamada and Shinonome Umi and i wish they were real because theyre super pretty and seem nice but when i realize there not real i get sad and jerk off again.

My wife knows it as "The HATE website" aka "What are you reading... is it the HATE website?".

 

[Sooty Soot]

you niggers picked on me in school so die.

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

Our trannies have the thickest, hardest girlcocks and our pooners are the most disappointing pooners around.

 

[JustSomeDong]

did you really bump this thread to reply to a week old post about cock you fucking faggot

You have posted twice at me to talk about cocks.

I liked the cheese discourse much more than the multi-page cock discourse

The masculine urge to talk about penises and their shapes.

 

[DickMain]

The melanin has already floated off his skin after watching so many ancient movies with vintage baddies

 

[JustSomeDong]

How do women at large feel about a stoic, intellectual penis?

"What are you listening to, honey?"
"An ooperator planning to defraud Medicare to fund a 1000 acre compound stuck in the 1990s, with Japanese music and violence-enforced punctuality."

"I have to be careful what I say on the Internet"
-Dear Feeder 2 minutes after calling in 10 ton bombs to be dropped on the Commonwealth.

"The man in the pickle suit was out with Kiwi Farms users celebrating the 250th birthday of America and trying to score some black girls, and found the nontent skelly got invited to a gala by Marco Rubio... This was after the Steel Toe took a win when he crashed his van into a front loader. Then the cocaine-dosed 9 year old got her cast signed by Jack Posobiec."

I hate that nothing Josh said seemed inexplicably insane.

 

[Autistic Joe]

Ver archivo adjunto 9246070
What is the charge? Eating niglet? A succulent Milwaukee niglet?

 

[Gentlebastard]

That poor woman needs therapy to work on her self confidence. But unfortunately all she’ll probably get is a liberal therapist who will try to gaslight her into thinking she’s the problem for that little bit of self respect she still has.

Jenkem use is unfairly stigmatized. It's free. It's natural. I've never seen a report of a driver on jenkem killing anybody. Weed and alcohol? Definitely can't say that.

Damn, here I thought I was being an arch racist but FACTS & LOGIC have shown that not to be the case.

there was a part of me screaming not to ask the question. I owe that part of me a drink as an apology.

 

[Among Us Gaming]

I observe the Sharty and the Sharty thread like a scientist observing an alien life form viciously maiming and killing its prey. I don’t understand it, I find it very interesting, and it scares me

 

[RomanianSchizo]

In this house we believe
Science is Neil
Black Seals Matter
No Neil is Illegal
Neil's Rights are Human Rights
Neil is Love
Kindness Towards Neil First

UTTP must die! I'm afraid this is gonna be it, We're kill them all and that's only way to do, It's time let Kiwis decide to destroy UTTP Forums and take them down! NOW! It is over for them. This is gonna be done!

If you want real advice go ask chatGPT, it sounds stupid, but treat it as a the rapist

I am detaining Paul Pelosi on suspicions of being an asian woman

I AM BLACK! When I commit crimes I don't wait for the police either! He is Black!

Calling it "a photo of Shrek's penis" carries some wild implications:

1) It's a real photo
2) Thus, Shrek is real
3) Shrek definitely 100% has a penis
4) This was a real, honest to God photograph of Shrek jorkin' his hog
5) Shrek loves it. I mean that one's not directly implied but you can assume he's having a great time crankin' that hog
6) This blogger might face prison time because of Shrek's erect penis

One does not simply deny Shrek's penis and its' implications.