random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CallmeCicada]

being touched by someone of the same gender feels a little homosexual. But after months of pinning suddenly I have fantasies about them running their hands all over me and shit like that. But I know it's not me. It's the gear.

 

[CaddestSlown]

Damn, I was called an gentrophile, nigger, retard, now I'm being called a communist because I like old movies.

Some guy with a nazi garfield pfp just marked my hitler fucks his neice post as dumb, myabe I AM a bad poster

 

[IamnottheNSA]

Ver archivo adjunto 7478598

Kiwi Farms breeds school shooters. They are very scary people.

 

[JustSomeDong]

Downloading half-naked women is a normal reaction to receiving pictures of Hitler. How do you fight hate? With love!

 

[PhoBingas]

I have been accused of being Kraut, Zidan, Sargon etc.

Never have I ever been accused of being a redditor. This is a new low.

 

[Gentlebastard]

You're such a talmudic tarbaby.

He doesn't do it because he knows a granny in a walker could beat him like a piñata.

Just trying to think of the funniest possible outcomes since I assume both sides can’t lose.

This dork is livestreaming with all his socials in the corner but decides to cover his face with a Balenciaga rag and Hermes Glasses, a real hero of the revolution

This post is meant for known kiwifarms lurker Donald J Trump. If you are not him, please stop reading now.

Crabs in a toilet.

Asking an Italian cook for spaghetti and meatballs is a great way to see a spergout.

You have an awkward, embarrassed excitement erection in a situation where you're trying to be suave and cool? Why share this?

I think with each minute of this stream, I become more racist and sexist. It's like Goku raising his power level while screaming, but instead of nonstop yelling, it's watching fat Mexicans and women.

I heard Spanish at walmart today how do I call in an FPV drone strike on these enemy combatants

Grave robbers are gainfully self-employed. This person is not employed.

 

[I'm a Silly]

I could go on a tyraid

 

[Dr. Butt]

oh im retarded as fuck!

 

[Tingle]

Freddy Fazbear has been deployed to Los Angeles.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Greetings, Homosexual. Have you considered suicide within the past 24 hrs and did your reasons for refusing it include the anticipation of niggers tonguing your anus next weekend?
Why do you choose to associate with convicted sex offender Cody Wilson? Ik he did like one thing ten years ago but is there an actual reason?
What is your relationship to Mrs. Zoopy and does it have anything to do with the aforementioned anus-tonguing niggers?
Did your introduction into 3d printed firearms have anything to do with your noted approval of the writings of Juan Posadas?
Addendum: what is your motivation to come into all corners of the internet and run damage control for this?

Gentrification of gangbangs lol
What a time to be alive.

you don't exactly get the name "French Bukkake Affair" out of spurious, baseless allegations, one would think

I assure you that everyone you're trying to insulate yourself from has this website, and probably this thread specifically, bookmarked.

He's literally mocking you, and you're too autistic to notice.

He's like a machine gun of negativity.

Null told me no in-fighting

And yet you still use the site. Curious.

She wasn't black, but she unironically looked a LOT like that....besides the power armor and gun

I think you should repent and stop sticking shit up your asshole.

Untermensch (trans)

There may be times when it’s arguably OK to chop off your dick but playing an iconic character like Princess Zelda isn't one of them.

These people are IRL family guy jokes

Aka bad jokes with predictable punchlines

The smartphone maker’s ideal customer is a 30 y/o latina dental assistant with an LV purse.

This post is so bang-on that reading it actually pissed me off, thanks.

Clone Troopers burning those disgusting bugmen to death was based. Any race that gives birth to giant worms that mind-control people and create zombies needs to go extinct.

I forget sometimes that this site is Autism.com and no one understand nuances and just pukes whatever they think onto the screen.

I'm tired of these IGNORANT conspiracy theories!!!! My great-great-great grandfather was a Jedi!!!! Darth Vader turned him into a bar of soap you fucking fuck!!!!

Keep your cyanide tablets within arm's reach.

Trannies tried to run a farm. Trannies murdered alpacas.

The End.

 

[Hitman One]

see this is why women are out-earning men. they charge each other 50k per year to goon together whereas guys just meet up on Reddit and do it for free.

 

[Law]

I am 100% right.

 

[Meat Target]

This guy is making my labia retract into my vagina for safety.

 

[Speedrunner]

can I enjoy one thing on this godforsaken planet without trannies forcing their girldicks into it?

 

[306h4Ge5eJUJ]

I heard if you insert it into Nulls butthole the babies come out with AR-15s in hand.

 

[Dr. Butt]

YouTube has killed more people than KiwiFarms.

 

[Ratboy Genius]

"English is not my first language and I don't want it to be. Any mistakes are made out of pure hatred and disrespect for this language. The English have taken enough from this world, I will not let them have my tongue as well.
Thank you."

Spoiler: source

It's an author's note from somebody's fanfiction on Ao3. I researched but it seems like the true source is unknown. All we have is a screenshot. Still hilarious. You could mistake it for an actual lolcow quote.

 

[I'm a Silly]

suspiciouns

 

[Aunt Carol]

Why does every retard think that the spic who shot the niggers is black?

 

[Pedophobe]

The Good News: You can get off the Internet.

While passionate, the narrative lacks evidence and coherence, reflecting the author's personal frustrations and fears about online culture.

How can one man suffer so many terrible plights?

What does My Little Pony have to do with this?

It's only as time goes on you start to see that it's not a bit but they actually just deranged.

You know life is going well and you certainly aren't seething and in a permanent state of pain when you find yourself wishing death to people online.

I forget sometimes that this site is Autism.com and no one understand nuances and just pukes whatever they think onto the screen.

Sorry for being off-topic but can someone give me a rundown of what has happened?