perhaps the most retarded idea I've ever had (Registered Agent Edition)

  • Iniciador del tema Iniciador del tema Null
  • Fecha de inicio Fecha de inicio
As a landlord, I do not recommend that you barter mail processing time in exchange for rent.

This will put you in a situation where, if they aren’t doing the work, it will take months to evict, with the law on the side of tenants, and will create confrontation between any new mail processors and deadbeats.

If you are an absentee landlord, pay a realtor or property manager to collect rent and handle repair, and pay someone living there to handle the mail, letthing them decide to use part of that to cover rent.
 
I think everyone's missing the forest for the trees. This isn't just a way to deal with bullshit lawsuits in Wyoming, it's a golden opportunity to finally get the Kiwi Farms Hype House up and running. Buy a mansion, put 20 lolcows in it, and the money Null will be raking in once he's Tik Tok famous will pay for all of the site's expenses.
 
Realistically the only way I can see this working is if you get a older retired dude living off social security where you give mail duties for (reduced) rent. Bonus point if its a old curmudgeon with guns (and a dog) that doesn't use the internet and just want to be left alone.
 
Not in the states listed but I just checked my State's website and the CGT only applies to commercial activity with a very high ceiling that I doubt lolcow LCC could make in it's lifetime, let alone one year. The requirements for Registered Agent are basically non-existent. I would be willing to do this, shoot me a DM if you are still looking and we can discuss the details.
 
So im pretty sure Commie Dick girl lives in Arizona. I am unsure if CDG owns a house, rents, and/or is willing to relocate to a neighbor state for a different house all together. Like someone said earlier, whether sarcastically or not, I do think it's worth reaching out. CDG is at wits end with harassment from trannys on twitter, and I think they'd be willing to do this as a middle finger to all the bullshit they have been flinging they/them way. This would also be a good way to show the world the farms is an ally💓, and to kickstart our new "roofs-over-trannys" initiative.

Obviously, this would make CDG persona en grata of the farms, and should be treated as such for saving said farms. That may be a tough pill to swallow for some. CDG wants a community, we need a person with enough spite to hold the fort. Seems like a quick fix to me. Personally, I've appreciated the amount of growth CDG has shown, and is proof that there are those who question the narrative from within. Just my two cents, I do acknowledge the retardedness of said plan in advance.
Unironically agree. Not too far away geographically, already loathed and associated with the farms by the cancellers, already a public persona, checks enough identitarian boxes to break wokescold brains and not easily cancelled by typical tactics, is already a vocal defender of this website, possibly needs some material help in life regarding living arrangements. CDG is perfect.
 
Unironically agree. Not too far away geographically, already loathed and associated with the farms by the cancellers, already a public persona, checks enough identitarian boxes to break wokescold brains and not easily cancelled by typical tactics, is already a vocal defender of this website, possibly needs some material help in life regarding living arrangements. CDG is perfect.
Josh has been pretty clear about not trusting People of Gender in the past. Maybe he'll look past it, though. CDG could be up for the task.
 
It needs to be somebody ideologically vetted. Somebody who has an axe to grind, who personally benefits from the feeling of being partly responsible for keeping KF up and running.
Not only do I believe that there are people out here who would do it, but I bet there's a person or two out there who would do it for free just out of spite of troons and enemies of free speech.
A plus would be somebody with good opsec including a limited online footprint, and hardly any relatives.
I'm unsure of the labor laws involved, but maybe that person could be paid in salary instead of hourly? I'm not sure what the minimum salary would be if there is any.
Perhaps the agreement on the housing is included in some form of employment contract?
 
This is like the horror movie trope "Your weird uncle's will leaves this mansion to you, but to claim it you must live there for an entire weekend". Except it's not a mansion nor a single weekend, and instead of ghosts or monsters you're dodging anthrax, troons and swattings.
Kiwifarms first reality TV show.
 
As of looking into it we could totally grow kiwis for some kind of profit so a literal kiwi farms is on the table
I will not say it is impossible, but highly unlikely. This is not professional advice, this is my personal job experience with crazy rich idiots who were high on crack dreaming of the next big thing.
Initial issues:
  • You can only grow "Kiwiberries" (Actinidia kolomikta, A. arguta and A. polygama) and those are finicky in that area. (Kiwifruit, or A. deliciosa, A. chinensis, A. arguta and A. melanandra grow Texas to VA)
  • You cannot use cottage laws to ship interstate. FDA regulations apply. Prepare to get ass raped by processing company monopolies.
  • High upstart cost
Regarding High upstart cost:
  • Trellis* construction for Kiwi is around 10,000 USD per acre pre-covid not including the plant price
  • Kiwifruits do not like wind at all, and require no/little wind and a windbreaker is required
  • A. kolomikta is preferred but will not grow in full sun
  • Genus requires well-drained (hint: sand/loam), pH 5.5-7.0 soil with high organic matter.
  • Fruit must be hand picked to avoid brusing/killing plant
  • Water well is going to cost you ~5-15k
  • You will need large manpower to trim them, Kiwi can grow 20 feet a year.
  • You can't really manage more than 1 acre (if you're lucky).
  • You're gonna have to pay them a fulltime salary.
Napkin math:
A. kolomikta gives you 15 lbs fruit per plant mature. You will sell roughly a quarter lbs for around 2 dollars ish if you're lucky. 194 x 15 x 4 x 2 = 23,280 per acre. This is assuming the plants are immediately mature (They aren't), you are the direct seller (You usually aren't). and as such your gross profit will be an inverted half life curve almost. Expect to earn roughly half that.

You will take ~10+ years to break at around 8 acres. This is not factoring cost of equipment (Tractor, pesticides, water well equipment, shipping costs).

Good luck.

You'd be literally better off trying to grow Black Walnut (Thousand Canker disease says hi) or Black Cherry (Root knot nematodes says hi) for timber in WY, good luck keeping them straight. Better yet, just build some fresh "organic" hydropontic facility and earn cash that way.

*Winged/standard T-bar should work. If you DIY I hope you have an auger, lots of concrete, and know how to wield properly.

A thought just occured to me: is there any way the autistic detective skills of the Farms could be channeled into finding, locating and then contacting those who've lost their jobs due to the antics of troons?
I've got your solution right here:
For context, these are the fellas that use AR-15s to bless their weddings. Bonus points for taking Waco's Branch Davidians as a pseudo-holy site.

From the wikipedia (lol):
Hyung Jin Moon (born September 26, 1979), also known as Sean Moon, is an American pastor and co-founder, alongside his wife, Yeon Ah Lee Moon, of the Pennsylvania-based World Peace and Unification Sanctuary Church, also known as Rod of Iron Ministries. The Sanctuary Church is a schismatic and militant sect of the Unification movement, which was founded by Hyung Jin Moon's father Reverend Sun Myung Moon. The Southern Poverty Law Center called Hyung Jin Moon an "anti-LGBT cult leader" in January 2018.

Moon and Sanctuary Church followers helped organize the 2021 United States Capitol attack.
 
Is there any possibility you could make donating to the site easier? I've always wanted to support (did buy the patches) but felt there was too many hoops to jump through to donate, or maybe I'm just too lazy. Most people are lazy. Maybe donating needs to be advertised more on the site, not at the bottom of the page, and a standard way to send funds implemented. I realize there are constraints due to these payment processors not supporting the site though. Gumroad hosts a lot of skeevy content consistently for years. Believe that's where Sam Hyde is. Patreon hosts Cumtown, idk if they're an option or not. Would those work? Maybe monthly trinkets to buy with the price jacked up as mainly a way to bring in more income? Getting the patch was pretty quick and easy to purchase. I know Id definitely buy more if there are no hoops to jump through to get money over to you.

I hope it works out but its a tall ask. Really opening a person up to risk and complete reputation destruction, and a hard time finding a legit job in the future depending on how much trannies put you on blast once doxxed. A well written contract for them to sign to try and mitigate betrayal, prepping of local police for upcoming swatting, and decent home security would be ideal. As others mentioned too you want an area someone WANTS to be in. A cheap hovel is going to have a shit community nobody will want to be in that's competent at least.
 
I was just about to say, have we considered making The Kiwi Farms a religious organization, officially? I don’t know how it helps for this problem exactly, but there are lots of advantages for religions in the US.
The various forum rules or tropes could be codified as scripture; thou shallt not toucheth the cow.
 
Some thoughts on the subject, most of which I think have been covered, a few that haven't.

Location, location, location. Small, conservative rural towns would probably be best. A place where you could reasonably know the local sheriff. A place with solid castle doctrine/stand-your-ground laws and one-party recording consent.

Get a place outside of the city. With the way investment bankers and holding companies are buying up property and driving up prices in recent years, anywhere inside of an incorporated town is eventually going to get completely fucked with property taxes. Even with the all the people fleeing big cities for the countryside, you can still find a few places where you can get a few acres pretty cheap.

Problem here is usually that makes it harder to get utilities, especially internet (more on this later). If you're far enough out, even power and water might be an issue. If the place in underdeveloped enough, you're going to have to put some investment into buildings, and if there is already buildings, the place might be a garbage strewn wreck like the tranch ranch.

Slight powerlevel here, unless the caretaker is a work-a-holic and/or independently wealthy, I've repeatedly seen two modes with this whole "ranch property" amongst my acquaintances: undeveloped crap and white trash junkyard.

I know someone who did exactly this after doing a few years of very lucrative contract work overseas. Bought a few acres on the edge of a small town in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. Wanted to make it a rental campground park. Spent YEARS trying to build the place up, with mostly volunteer work, and got nowhere. (It also didn't help that his co-investors bailed on him after seeing the expense and the taxes on the "improvements".)

I have another acquaintance who moved out to a "ranch" and it's literally nothing more than a pair of rundown houses with a junk yard in front of it. Also, lol at regional wireless internet. Good luck getting more than 10mbps.

As for your trusty employee, you might even want to hire a retired small town police officer to be your agent. Plusses here would be and existing relationship with the local police/sheriff's department, might be able to double as security, ability to carry and use a gun. If he's range buddies with the local cops, even better.

As much as Tim Pool is a uneducated narcissist, he is not entirely unwise. The "Beanie Compound" is a pretty good idea for this threat model. Having a front driveway with "No Trespassing/Trespassers Will Be Shot" signs in a county sympathetic to that sort of thing goes a long way to deter alogs who want to drag things IRL. Once again, being friendly with the local Sheriff/PD goes a long way to make SWATing less dangerous.


Diversifying your business isn't a bad idea either, and a physical location helps with that. As others have pointed out, creating a business entity that does registered agent work for other hard-to-work-with businesses would be a natural place to expand. The place could also double as a dropship business, no more last minute hunts for drop shipping businesses for the next tee-shirt sale. Hell, if the nearest town has a shirt printing/embroidering place, contribute to the local economy.

Finally, have you ever thought of becoming your own ISP? I admit, this may sound like a breathtakingly retarded move with your threat model, but has some merits. It would solve the connectivity problems if your "office" is in a rural area, and you can probably get government grants (article archive) for bringing "high-speed broadband service" to underserved areas. You could do a small bit of hosting there and sell rack space to the locals.

On the flip side, it'll just give them another DDOS target. It will probably get hacked. It would also drag others into the fray... which could also up the stakes for the attackers. Attacks would produce the kind of "real damages" that get people v& by the feds... though I have little confidence in them going after anyone less visible than a lulzsec.
 
5. Handle being swatted by trannies pretty much constantly.
isn't there a protection thing you can do in PD's relating to having your address being swat-immune? whoever's the brave kiwi that does that can do two things:
  • work from home so he/she has little reason to go outside to be harassed by trannies
  • stream shit from time to time in order to have this protection thingy work since many streamers were doxxed and some killed until that shit went in effect

4. Handle being visited by trannies and antifa without doing anything stupid.
define stupid, stupid as in telling them to piss off or stupid as in going murica without reason and video evidence? it's clear that a CCTV system will be needed as well as signs around the house telling YOUR ACTIONS NEAR THIS HOUSE ARE RECORDED YOU FUCKING RETARD (or something smilar) which should give a base leverage against troon manipulation, give me rainbows if you will but having proof to show the general layman that you are innocent is my point here, i couldn't give two fucks about these manipulative shits and their faggot shadowy masters.

Q. What are the requirements of a registered agent?
A. Be a natural person and live in the address listed for the business. With only slight deviation, that is all it takes in every state.
and there goes my chances of having a murican green card...
 
Five Nights at Trannies.
This has to happen.
Jersh can only have one thing in Casa Del Kiwi... BBW - Bigly Beautiful Women.

He'll find Mukbangers and ship them in via Big Rig. Door Dash will be ordered around the clock. The only exercise the gals will get is walking to the mailbox and back.

What better way to support a Lolcow forum then have a literal cow be the support?
 
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