💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votos: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votos: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votos: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votos: 34 2.1%
  • October-November 2024

    Votos: 37 2.3%
  • December 2024

    Votos: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votos: 257 16.2%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votos: 258 16.3%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votos: 926 58.4%

  • Total de votantes
    1,585
It kills me that Tim Curry had one stroke and it fucked him up, whereas Fatty is still alive (such as it is) after five.

Die Jack.
 
The difference is that Jack was already living like he'd had five strokes; and used each one as an excuse to do less for himself. He didn't miss walking enough to try walking again - Yet he insists on pretending he can stand or walk in his Youtube excuses to eat; so no one can think less of him. Those are the priorities that make up all the different between Jack and someone such as Curry; who had far more to lose.
 
Oh he's so fucking mad. Also lmao the irony

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Oh he's so fucking mad. Also lmao the irony

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Boomer is as much a state of mind as it is from a certain period.

Yeah hew might be Gen-X but he's probably born on the leading edge of Gen-X like... 1968 or something meaning he actually has MORE in common with boomers than some Gen-X guy born at the tail end in 1985 who'd be closer to Millennials.
 
Oh he's so fucking mad. Also lmao the irony

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Jack, if you love God and America, raise your right hand over your chest and recite the pledge of allegiance start to finish without AI.

Is Rob riding the GLP-1 train? He's looking really trim lately! Always great to see someone taking steps to improve their own health. Best wishes on your weight loss journey, Rob! ❤️

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Rob: A humble, happy, motivated golden-year bloke content to put out his content to a small subscriber base.

Jack: "alright guise, tonight on Unsolved Mysteries, we're gonna talk about shrinkflation. See this box of fruity pebbles? look."
Jack smashes the box with his forehead until it tears open. Tammy silently pulls the sealed bag out for the camera.
"See? Half of it is just air. It's not even half full! You're paying for AIR. Shrinkfl-.eughhh.. fla..."
Jack shits himself and tries to play it off as indigestion.
 
Jack, if you love God and America, raise your right hand over your chest and recite the pledge of allegiance start to finish without AI.
*mirrors video, raises left hand* i bledjj allejunce, to da FAG, ob de unidud steaks of aBERICA, ang do da reguglick, for witches hands, one bation, under JEZZUS, *pauses, momentarily looks pig-smug*, ingrebisible, wid BIBERTY and justug bor ALL.. How's that, MOM?"
 
*mirrors video, raises left hand* i bledjj allejunce, to da FAG, ob de unidud steaks of aBERICA, ang do da reguglick, for witches hands, one bation, under JEZZUS, *pauses, momentarily looks pig-smug*, ingrebisible, wid BIBERTY and justug bor ALL.. How's that, MOM?"
"Well done Jack, bingo. Happy 250th! You're a true American. I'll upload it to your channel for you, no need to worry. That was quite a workout, you should celebrate. Would you like me to fast-track an order of a nice triple-double bacon cheeseburger, blue rare, MOD ADD BACON, (-) lettuce, (-) tomato, ADD BACON, WHISKEY RIVER BBQ, CRISPY ONION STRINGS, ADD BACON with garlic-seasoned steak fries MOD WELL DONE, ADD SEASONING from Red Robin for you? I recommend getting a side of SIDE SCORPION SAUCE for you and Tamarella?"

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Is Rob riding the GLP-1 train? He's looking really trim lately! Always great to see someone taking steps to improve their own health. Best wishes on your weight loss journey, Rob! ❤️

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the journey is the destination
 

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rican. I'll upload it to your channel for you, no need to worry. That was quite a workout, you should celebrate. Would you like me to fast-track an order of a nice triple-double bacon cheeseburger, blue rare, MOD ADD BACON, (-) lettuce, (-) tomato, ADD BACON, WHISKEY RIVER BBQ, CRISPY ONION STRINGS, ADD BACON with garlic-seasoned steak fries MOD WELL DONE, ADD SEASONING from Red Robin for you?
Best be sure that all of that food's fried in lard and made with beef tallow because KETO
 
Oh he's so fucking mad. Also lmao the irony

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You just exposed yourself as a zoomer. :smug:

I just noticed this reply on the orange creamsicle cookie video. I initially thought this was 15 years ago and he was just being a boomer with the all caps and then I noticed it's 8 months ago.
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Bonu gif and animated webp.
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You just exposed yourself as a zoomer. :smug:

I just noticed this reply on the orange creamsicle cookie video.
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Yeah that's one of his many excuses. Tammy's coworkers, the men's slumber party at his church, the snack boxes for retards packing party at his church, and so on. Just lying about the shit when we know he gorges himself constantly between episodes of Blues Clues.

and lol, the attached image above. I had almost forgotten about Fatty's era of putting AI images of housepets in the thumbnails for his videos, failing to realize it made it look like he was implying he was cooking up dogs and cats.
 
"Well done Jack, bingo. Happy 250th! You're a true American. I'll upload it to your channel for you, no need to worry. That was quite a workout, you should celebrate. Would you like me to fast-track an order of a nice triple-double bacon cheeseburger, blue rare, MOD ADD BACON, (-) lettuce, (-) tomato, ADD BACON, WHISKEY RIVER BBQ, CRISPY ONION STRINGS, ADD BACON with garlic-seasoned steak fries MOD WELL DONE, ADD SEASONING from Red Robin for you? I recommend getting a side of SIDE SCORPION SAUCE for you and Tamarella?"

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the journey is the destination
Fatty trying to do the clickbait thumbnail of surprise is hilarious because he made it look like he's getting ready for Tammy's bull
 
The amount of weight he put on over the course of the year he was preaching the gospel of carnivore (while posting those weight, blood pressure, and glucose readings he pulled out of his ass) still makes me laugh.
It makes me laugh how he sometimes pretends he's carnivore still and other times is shoveling cake or bread down his gullet
 
failing to realize it made it look like he was implying he was cooking up dogs and cats.
Chairman Jack's various 5 Year Plans 5 Day Diets, also known as the Great Limp Forward, has resulted in the Scalfani household resorting to ...unconventional sources for meatz.


Fatty trying to do the clickbait thumbnail of surprise is hilarious because he made it look like he's getting ready for Tammy's bull
Jacks' always prepped for the bull.

he can still relish in his phimotic victories, after unsheathing the Bull's cock for his gaping whore wife.
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Prep the Bull, Jer.
 
Jack, I know you aren’t interested in a healthy lifestyle at all, so please make this homemade vanilla cake on camera for my enjoyment. I know Tammy can help you, and this type of cake is something a beginner could do.
If it's something a beginner could so then it's too complicated for him.

Seriously this guy can fuck up the easiest recipes out there.
 
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