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💰 GrifterElijah Schaffer / RiftTV / Slightly Offensive - Right-wing culture warrior, substance-addled bisexual horndog who can't keep it in his pants, has lost work and now his family
Schaffer decided to go full "I hate niggers" today on "Juneteenth" when it's Happy Rosenberg Day instead but that's not about this. Since I'm just a dumbass that likes to focus on the legal aspect of things. He had a hearing earlier this week where the judge dismissed his divorce petition / dissolution hearing which kicks it back to Texas now.
So Palm Beach court that Monday (dismissal for lack of jurisdiction). He lives in Frisco. He filed in Florida anyway because he didn't want to wait for Texas' 6 month residency requirement. Now he’s on stream performing like he’s still stuck in Boca fighting for his life. Whatever.
Quick legal frame so the clips make sense — not a docket dump:
• Wilkins suit — federal, still in settlement conference as of mid-May (5/6 and 5/12 conferences, negotiations ongoing).
• Denton custody (26-1148-362) — the real kids case. Frisco. He didn’t show for a hearing, caught a default, got it set aside, now supervised possession. Texas and Florida judges were literally on the phone coordinating who had jurisdiction.
• Palm Beach divorce — he swore he lived in FL six months; filings show he was in Texas. Dismissed even after he was cross examined.
He knows all of this. The clips are him performing for no reason because it doesn't matter as the case is dismissed.
───
0:23
│ "Even my lawyer called me today and said, apparently it's like a federal holiday."
He wants you to know he’s still got a lawyer while wearing a do-rag. Won’t say which case — Wilkins settlement? I doubt it. Dead Florida divorce? Denton custody? Vague on purpose. Schaffer always keep it fuzzy.
───
1:20
│ "I lived in Boca Raton in Florida."
│ "It's not safe here anymore. And that's why I moved out too."
Past tense. Honest for once. He left. Court papers say Frisco since November 2025. This is the clip that makes the rest of the episode embarrassing — he already told you he’s gone.
───
0:12
│ "that's why I moved out too."
───
2:34
│ "In this environment, like I am... Well, I can't move because I'm in a custody battle."
Present tense. Trapped by minorities and litigation.
He moved. The custody fight is in Texas, where he’s pro se half the time and already got defaulted once for not appearing. "Can’t move" is just him LARPing for whatever audience he has — same guy who broke a Delray lease and shipped his studio to Collin County. He’s not stuck. I guess he chose the stuck story because it sounds harder and earns sympathy?
───
1:23
│ "I'd like to take next steps in this in this case that I'm involved in."
Monday his Florida divorce got thrown out. Thursday he’s asking for next steps like nothing happened. He skips it and complains about the federal holiday blocking him and as usual pretending the dismissal didn’t happen. Something to note which Palm Beach County was indeed closed for the holiday.
───
1:10
│ "I live next to a Kabbalist sorcery training center in Boca Raton."
│ "They have those. They're really cool. I love going."
"I live." Present tense. After he said he moved out.
There is a Jewish center nearby which is the Helen & Irvin Spatz Foundation / Boca Raton Jewish Experience High Holiday services. All they do is do synagogue outreach.
He rebrands that as Kabbalist sorcery training because the Jews!!!.
Again he doesn’t live there anymore. He lives in Texas. He was in Florida court Monday and lost. He still says live in Boca even though he said he moved out in this episode.
│ "I learned that you don't want the people you love being friends with Kabbalists..."
From the man who can’t keep his own story straight for one episode.
More retardation from Elijah today. He’s threatening to sue his brother in law for supposedly doxxing his address. Here’s the thing, Elijah. Pay attention here. I’ll help you.
That’s an amazing website that has your now dismissed divorce petition. That filing will never go away because Florida is a sunshine state where almost everything is public records. You run a search. Since I have an account with PBC (free registration), I can download the filings myself.
You filed what was called an “UNIFORM CHILD CUSTODY JURISDICTION AND ENFORCEMENT ACT (UCCJEA) AFFIDAVIT”. Guess what is on there?! Your own address. You doxed yourself.
I also have your rental agreement which Kezia filed proving you live in Texas.
If you want to sue someone, sue the state of Florida. You filed in Florida, you absolute retard. You couldn’t wait for six months to file for divorce in Texas so you had to file in Florida where you didn’t even live anymore.
Elijah crashed out at some groyper that correctly pointed out that this would have been all avoided if he wasn't such a degenerate. And Elijah used the word "estranged" in his post confirming that he doesn't have custody of the children since they're on supervised visit.
This shameless fucking liar knows full well his information is a matter of public record. Imagine being this desperate to look like a poor little victim.
...but courts don't "press charges" or decide whether you can or not. That's what the prosecutor's office (a.k.a. "the district attorney's office") does.
Courts decide whether charges are valid, yes, but that's done in a "trial" held by the court after charges are laid. By a prosecutor.
...but courts don't "press charges" or decide whether you can or not. That's what the prosecutor's office (a.k.a. "the district attorney's office") does.
Courts decide whether charges are valid, yes, but that's done in a "trial" held by the court after charges are laid. By a prosecutor.
You'd think that a right wing grifter of all people would know this, seeing as how George Soros whole thing is getting DA's elected so that they don't charge people with crimes lmfao.
Degenerates share strategies. Elijah, much like Chibi, is crying that Kiwi Farms is going to swat him.
What's next? That KF is preparing a second (the first is stalking Chibi) elite squad of vantablack niggers to rape Elijah? That sounds like something Elijah would probably enjoy.
CLIPS
from the JUNETEENTH episode of the Fuentes-Pre-Show
Elijah opens the show playing some juneteenth videos and dancing to them. Elijah makes a mental notes that he shares with everyone: don't say the minors in the video are "hard", refer to them as "tuff" instead...pause.
1:30
Elijah brings up an AI generated video of Charlie Kirk breaking it down and then makes unsubstantiated claims about Kirk saying that he was somewhat of a white nationalist behind the scenes and that he was converting to Catholicism? Elijah goes on to say that Charlie Kirk's wife MIGHT have thought he was attractive, he does not know, and says that they were a "looks-matched" couple, that Erika Kirk is not attractive, implying that Elijah thinks Charlie Kirk was ugly.
2:39
Elijah makes a point of sharing a story where he and the Rift crew were talking about Juneteenth openly while eating and a black man got up and left because of their conversation. Nicky says he thinks the guy was just done with his sandwich but Elijah insists it was because of them, "he only ate two bites".
0:26
Nicky gives a pretty good answer to the question, "do you believe racism exists". Funny because his outfit undermines his serious answer and tone.
0:32
The same question is posed to Georgie and they lampoon black people answering the question which evolves into them doing impressions of the black lady that went viral from their video at the Karmello Anthony verdict protest. IM GLAD U JUS SAID DAT!!! KARMELLO WAS DEFENDIN HISSELF!!!
1:00
Elijah says that the apartment he lived in while in Boca Raton was a "streamer apartment" that eventually was abandoned by all of the social media types because the black streamers friends and relatives would visit and cause disturbances that made the apartments unsafe.
2:33
Elijah plays a video from John Doyle who got his start at BlazeTV alongside Elijah. For context, Nick Fuentes hates John Doyle with a passion and so Georgie vicariously also hates Doyle. Elijah says that he believes that Doyle has potential and refuses to speak ill of him. Elijah says that Doyle saw what happened to Elijah at Blaze and learned how not to behave or something? Worth preserving for potential future drama, I cut out the actual video of doyle and forgot to stitch the two together, sorry.
1:56
1:17
Elijah says that the content curated for this episode was to show his dad the alternate side of diversity. Elijah talks about boomers generally and then they complain about blacks and Georgie complains about getting the wrong coffee order? Nicky implies that Georgie crashed out at a service worker over coffee recently.
5:29
Elijah suggests going to Deep Ellum, a minority area of Dallas, that night for Juneteenth. Elijah suggests bringing guns so that they can shoot someone. Elijah says that they will not die if they go do this because...blacks are like pit bulls? His cohosts immediately laugh at his comparison. Elijah is not really afraid of blacks by the way. "Before anyone uses this in court or whatever" he says before explaining that he flashed his gun at blacks at the protest because they were threatening him.
4:56
Nicky breaks out into song. Elijah wants to hate it but has to admit that Nicky has a good voice. Elijah then sings as well... Elijah sings some sort of slave song. Elijah says he's going to start writing his ideas down...doubt it. They all give the black power fist and Nicky calls for "draco" (vrillify I think) to clip it. Georgie has to ask if they are "good people" after the songs. Some orthodox/catholic shitposting transpires.
6:47
Elijah recalls being stopped in a store with a backpack on and getting searched in high school because he was with a black friend.
3:27
The show is briefly interrupted while an "energy drink" is found. This is the last one in the house so Elijah and Nicky split it. The drink is fluorescent pinkish?
3:41
Elijah gives some advice, I think he's saying if you're inebriated and need to seem normal you can do a bunch of push ups to get your blood flowing and also you should punch yoursself in the balls? Elijah plays a video of a wigger speaking unintelligibly and then talks about the "wigger accent" which he attributes to percocet and xanax, which he definitely does NOT do. At this point in the show Elijah begins furiously texting and this quickly becomes an issue.
2:04
Nicky sets Elijah up for a pre-planned joke about his girlfriend, Isis, but Elijah is busy texting her and fails to remember his line. Elijah characterizes their relationship as "a pedophile rapist falls in love with a mudshark" and Nicky reminds him that he forgot his line. Elijah then does a terrible Kip (from Napolean Dynamite) impression as the bit and Nicky slaps him for being a homo as part of it. Elijah says that Isis told him that he looked like Kip when he put on the wigger outfit for the episode. Georgie outs Elijah's texting by performatively going back to him right when he begins to text and Elijah begins to get annoyed.
2:34
Elijah says that the hottest blonde girls that were raised in WASP homes are twerking in bars and this is the state of the world now. Georgie cuts to Elijah texting again and Elijah gets angry and shouts that he shouldn't cut to Elijah when he isn't speaking, ELIJAH KNOWS HOW PRODUCTION WORKS!!!!
1:20
Elijah plays a "fan" made AI generated video of the RiftTV casting couch featuring Sarah Stock, his current girlfriend Isis, and Empathchan. They have to cut the video when it gets too racy after Sarah Stock removes her top and reveals her AI bra.
3:25
Elijah gives a little gay culture trivia about the unseating of Madonna as the pre-eminent LGBT pop culture icon.
6:44
Elijah begins to end the stream and does an autistic bit with his guns.
0:27
Unable to contain himself, Elijah has to sperg out one more time before the end of the stream. Elijah jokes about mudsharks a bit before sperging about people believing Milo. Elijah says that some internet comedian unfollowed him and refused to have him on his show after Milo released his dossier, not sure who exactly he means.
Dear god, he's sooooo boring. I'd rather watch Matt Walsh he's that uninteresting. And how do you devote 7 minutes to Madonna? Even gays who like her don't talk about her that much. Congrats on being a turbofag, Elijah.
CLIPS
From the June 22nd episode of the Fuentes-Pre-Show
Elijah reads a comment he received on fathers day from a muslim. Elijah goes on to says that he hopes for a reverse Zimbabwe situation in America eventually.
2:39
Elijah calls himself a retired investigative reporter. Elijah teases coming content, a series called "The New America"
2:03
Elijah gets distracted by comments in the Rumble chat, sadly I did not catch what they were. Elijah calls on his mods to deal with "weirdos doing some weirdo stuff".
0:53
Elijah reveals that he has recently downloaded Snapchat to talk to his new girlfriend...yeah, this is going to end well! Elijah definitely won't be sending dick pics to young girls! Elijah goes on to talk about Lulu Lemon spandex yoga pants and how they are a trap of immorality for God-fearing Orthobros like himself. Elijah makes up some scripture.
3:43
Elijah talks about track suits for a moment and shares that he was arrested at Mar-A-Lago while wearing a track suit and was bailed out by Charlie Kirk and Candace Owens. He has not worn a track suit since.
1:08
Elijah talks about western culture and talks about how the rave culture has changed due to demographic shifts. Elijah again brings up being raised in a cult and says that he recalls being told that the world would end in the year 2000 and how his faith in God was forever tainted with doubt when the world kept turning into the new millenia. This devolves into random intr-Christian denomination autism.
10:24
Elijah talks more about culture after bringing up some photo from Libs of Tiktok. Elijah says that trauma is what often creates fetishes. Elijah mentions suicidal thoughts and once again reiterates he does NOT have them. He has previously said that every man has suicidal ideations, so is Elijah admitting he's going on HRT? More talk about his body issues, Elijah says he is down 22 pounds in 2 months. Elijah says he is going to go on retatrutide and again brings up his dossier alleging he is on various vanity prescriptions. Elijah talks a good bit about pharmaceuticals and talks at length about how there have been changes to the Adderral product line.
16:24
Pharmaceutical talk CHASER: on Jaden McNeil's stream on Tuesday, Jaden said that he has been told that people close to Elijah are telling others behind the scenes that Elijah uses and ABUSES the new designer drug 7-OH, AKA "gas station heroin" (this is the stuff Actionman is believed by many to be taking taking when he relapsed on stream). In the video where Elijah calls Empathchan he is clearly under the influence of alcohol, but could he have also been mixing it with this new, opioid-like drug?
1:01
Elijah ends the episode with a little life advice before talking about the new content mentioned before. Georgie says they had to get through the legal stuff but they're back on track and will be putting out shorter videos on Youtube and Locals. They said they have done one video like this before but won't talk too much about it. Then Elijah randomly launches into a long aside about having to talk to the police about threats he is receiving. For instance, Elijah says that he was at the Frisco PD following up on a serious threat when his phone rang and it was someone else at the Frisco PD calling about a different threat. I'm sure Elijah would love to point the finger at this thread but he does not. Why? I'd wager these threats are from blacks in Dallas who saw Elijah's girlfriend in his viral clip.
Elijah reads a comment he received on fathers day from a muslim. Elijah goes on to says that he hopes for a reverse Zimbabwe situation in America eventually.
