I am obsessed with his absolutely incredible quotes. I mean: he compiled his own Little Red Book at the end of his signatures on forums 20 years ago (third link below). I just cannot believe what a living caricature he is -- from the way he addresses strangers using his private vocabulary ('webbies' and 'netters'), to the verbal equivalent of running like Naruto:
"I didn't invent reality, sunshine -- I just verbally bitchslapped you across the face with it."
"I'm a Netter, and we Netters do things a bit different than you Webbie kids. Over on Usenet there's no such thing as banning, censoring, or even deleting posts. You either take what's given and accept it or you put blinders on (kill filters) and shut yourself the **** up from whoever it was who made you cry. The hostile environment breeds incredible creativity though. Yes, it's true, many aspiring artists in their respective fields do wind up completely ripped apart and simply give up, quit and run home to mommy...but those that don't...those who view the critiques and attacks as challenges to their ability, challenges to be met and overcome...they reach a whole new level of expertise. I like to call it, God Level Design. "
"but oh no, yer from the lil Johnny Flunk school of education…passed along from one grade to the next, always getting an ‘A’ for having a positive ‘Attitude’, always having someone there to spoon feed you and wipe your ass for you, never once even tasting the bitterness of failure or inadequacy…well, until you reach the real world anyway, then ya meet someone like me who pretty much bitch slaps you eight ways to last Tuesday with yer own stupidity. And so really, what recourse do you have? I mean it’s not like I’m wrong, it’s not like you can actually counter any of the arguments or points I brought up in the email to your client…so what does lil Johnny Flunk do in a situation like that? Yeah, that’s right…you lie…you slander…you fuck Jesus up the ass with the business end of a steel rake and you resort to the most pathetic, Hitler inspired, cliche of “attacks”, couching your failed reasoning in the guise of, “Oh I read the accusation somewhere else by a doorknob just like me so it MUST be true!” Let me tell ya something child, I’ve seen yer lil song and dance many times over. I’ve been on the net even before you knew what the Internet was. I’ve been randomly accused of pretty much everything under the sun, from being a supposed pedophile, to the polar opposite contradiction of a pedophile (an adult baby), to even the full embodiment of the antichrist himself. Your flailing, blind accusations however hold no weight and unfortunately for you, you can’t back lies up with bullshit. So you fail…and that makes you angrier…doesn’t it? So you do it again…and again…and again…and eventually an interesting thing happens. You become what’s known by many as a “Hatter Addict”.Forever trying to “get back” at me for blistering your ass over my knee with reality, rather than simply own up to your failings. Little Johnny Flunk can NEVER admit to failure, can you?"
Jesus fucking Christ, man
