What would a movie about Lolcows be like?

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I mean you have Forest Gump, Napoleon Dynamite, Mr. Bean, O Pagador de Promessas, Simpsons, Archer, etc. Protagonists of a lot of comedies and even some tragedies are lolcows. Pagador de Promessas being an example of both.
ToroidalBoat dijo:
A comedy and a tragedy?
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Última edición:
It'd would be about a 3.2 on IMDB

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There could be a background character called "Jonathan Yaniv" and he could wander from scene to scene smelling of rotting flesh and singing

"who would like a loverly tampon? I have them for 9 year olds! Have you seen my clitoris? I think my support dog ate it?"
 
Unpleasantness dijo:
There could be a background character called "Jonathan Yaniv" and he could wander from scene to scene smelling of rotting flesh and singing

"who would like a loverly tampon? I have them for 9 year olds! Have you seen my clitoris? I think my support dog ate it?"
Presiona para expandir...
"I will sue you for looking at me funny! Here's my golf club, and I'm a convicted sex offender "

That would be uncle Tony.
 
It would be a non-linear comedy chronicle with horror elements that has several character arcs connected to each other in cow crossovers
 
Mockumentary style until the end when you learn it was all real.
 
Some cows would need entire series on their own. One of Chris Chan would be funny where the trolls are depicted from his point of view and made out to be the dark evil supervillains he thought they were.
 
THIS SUMMER... EVERYONE'S FAVORITE SPERG IS COMING TO THE BIG SCREEN
[cuts to clyde cash voiced by jack black] "What a bummer!"
[Ke$ha starts playing] WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE I'M P DIDDY
[Chris-chan wakes up giddy for the morning as Megan Schroeder is carried away in the distance, his alarm is still going off and he can't hear her, scrolls through some messages, looks up as he's about to read "Megan kidnapped" remembers to wake up Sonichu, who's alarm is the local radio]
"in other news, Megan Schroeder has been-"
[Chris-chan voiced by Chris Pratt] "It's me! Your tomgirl sister, Christine! We need to hurry way past cool if we're going to get anything done!"
[Sonichu voiced by Charlie Day] "just go on without me, man"
"but together we are the Super Loveheart CPUs! Without you I'm just... a regular CPU."
TWO UNLIKELY HEROS WILL FIND THEMSELVES...
Chrischan: "what?! Megan is missing?"
Sonichu: "really?"
Chrischan: "and Clyde took her?”
Sonichu: "wow REALLY?"
BUT FIRST THEY HAVE TO FIND HER...
Clyde Cash: "I know what girls like!"
[presents a cup of Fanta with suspiciously milky substance at the bottom]
[Megan kicks him in the balls]
Clyde: "AAAAA My pokéballs!"
WHO MIGHT NEED TO BE SAVED FROM MEGAN...!
[Megan voiced by who do you fucking think, it's Anya Taylor-Joy] "Look, my main issue is NOT the website itself. It's just the fact that you drew those weird pictures. Um....ok...so instead of removing that one completely, you just enlarge my crotch....thanks a lot....WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST REMOVE IT??!!”
THIS SUMMER IS GOING TO BE
[montage of slap stick]
[Chrischan moaning and jerking off]
Sonichu "aaawkward"
THIS SUMMER IS GOING TO BE..............
[montage that's pretty much the inevitable dance party ending]
[several OCs doing a head spin]
LIIIIIIIIT 😎😎😎
 
If it was going on TV I'd say something like Trailer Park Boys, where all of them are somehow in the same apartment complex (or trailer park), a camera crew follows the one normal person around and films his interactions with them.

If it's a movie I say bring John Waters onto the site and just let him go nuts.
 
So I am a bored person most of my day, and here was a thought I had on a movie/TV show front that I threw around, one that also involves the Farms:

Like a kind of schizophrenia (for lack of a better word), Lolcows start life fairly normal, but they start acting up after a point. Some are fairly harmless or at least try to do some good despite their situation, while many others are... not, with the majority being blights on whatever population they touch.

The KF is a rogue research network trying to figure out what makes a person a Lolcow, spreading awareness of these types in their community, and keeping some tabs of the ones out there to monitor any changes in mental state for their behavior. A select few also are monitors IRL,

Every now and again, there is an occasional defector who breaks the cardinal rules of the team*. At best, they're thrown out and only spoken of in passing. At worst, they become the thing they once fought, another case history to study.

But the team pushes on; maybe there is no real cure to the Lolcow issue, but as long as they keep spreading and finding what they can, they can keep their hopes up for a brighter tomorrow.
 
If we're being serious I can image someone making a documentary on a cow in the style of something like Grizzly Man.
 
It would be The 40 Year Old Virgin, except the grandma at the end would be the main character's mother.
 
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