Which wild animal makes the best pet?

[Sparkletor 2.0]

I'm thinking of getting my nephew (half black) a pet for his birthday (turning 3) but I have no money (got scammed by an Onlyfans whore). I had a brilliant idea while in the shower (I ask people to spray me down at the local car wash) to just acquire a wild animal as a reasonable solution. What wild animal (or plant) is the best and what's the best (cheapest) way to catch one?

Serious answers only. Cryptids (bigfoots, mothmans, chupacabras, etc) aren't real.

 

[Dysnomia]

In my experience sparrows, pigeons and squirrels are the easiest critters to make frens with. Believe it or not you can befriend house mice too. But your best bet is to befriend a feral cat. A domestic cat mind you. Not a mountain lion or a real lion or anything like that.

 

[Pagan Min]

Spider monkey on crack. Hours of fun for children of all ages!

 

[Unfiltered Sunshine]

Wild ass pussy

 

[donksmanSupreme42]

Wild ass pussy

a wild donkey is a very bad idea

theyre pretty territorial and like 20 times stronger than you

not to mention the fact that u can't convince a donkey that ur the alpha, cuz they are mostly solitary, no herd instinct to exploit