Silly things you did as a kid

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
One year for Christmas when I was 5 my mom bought me a big Barbie dream house, several Barbies, custom made clothes, and a large, realistic plastic salmon toy. Guess which one I liked more?

Later on I'd play with the house, but only when I'd make my toy animals kill Barbie and her friends and take her house.
 
For whatever reason, my mom didn't buy aluminum foil when I was little. When I'd visit other people's houses, I was entranced by this marvelous substance and would try and get pieces to bring home. I'd wrap my Barbies in foil and pretend they were astronauts or knights.

I actually learned how to draft patterns and make clothes because my "Barbies" were really old Mary Poppins and Tammy dolls from the 60s, so normal Barbie clothes wouldn't fit them. When I decided to apply my newfound skills and cut up all my bedsheets to make cool outfits for my sister and me, that...didn't go over very well.
 
Oh my God, another Barbie foot chewer. I would literally sit and watch movies or draw or read with a Barbie sticking out of my mouth as I gnawed on their feet. My girlfriend and I were going through some of my old childhood things one time and she was so confused/concerned when she saw the mangled feet.

I also had one Ken doll and a million Barbies, so I would either pretend he was in love with all of them or his slaves (haha wat). After a while I got bored with that and turned my Barbie house into a lesbian colony.
 
Oh yeah I remembered something from kindergarten. I remember doodling in class and the girl next to me drew a cute little rainbow. I wanted to draw a rainbow too, but I was a dumbass and I thought that to draw a rainbow all you really need are a bunch of colors. So I just scribbled all the colors into a big blob and it was a mess. She told me my rainbow was ugly and I got mad.
 
When I was 7 I did a science report on temperature. Fine, fine, normal second grade homework stuff, but I was so MAD that no adult could look at my awesome presentation poster without bursting into laughter. The reason? I drew a thermometer that looked like a giant dick with come shooting out.
 
When I was either 4 or 5, I would refer to power lines as "negs". I don't know why I'd connect something like this to a word that almost sounds like a racial slur:
fpl_site_2.jpg
 
I would try to sit on top of those concrete posts outside of buildings.

I had a bad habit of messing with store merchandise displays, of expensive items.

I would uninstall random shit from the family computer just to see if they would notice.
 
Not long after I discovered warrior cats, I formed a warrior cat club during the afterschool program and managed to convince a bunch of guys in my grade to join/read the books. We all had our own warrior cat names and ran around outside during recess, hunting or battling each other.
 
When I was about a year old, Me and my brother brought a ice cream bucket with a few dozen tent caterpillars inside the house. The caterpillars started squirming out of the bucket, so we set the bucket on the floor and left it for Mom to find.

Then there was that time about the same age I put hand soap into the dishwasher and Mom found out after the dishwasher started making wierd noises and suds poured out the vent.
 
I believed that adult life could be happy and you could do whatever you wanted to.
 
Selected Readings from Silver's Childhood Diary
(There are only like 12 entries in this thing spanning from 2002-2005)

May 7, 2002
Tonight was another Girl Scout night, but Kara didn't come over. Her mom thought she had too much homework. At Girl Scouts we made rainshaker and guitars. The guirtar had five and the rain shaker had lots of beads for shaking inside covered tube. The guitar is a shoebox.

November 20 1, 2002
Today will be great. Sarah is coming over and - this is cool - SLEEP OVER! We're going to Celebration Station. We're only going on the inside because it's too cold.

my FAVORITE GODDAMN ENTRY:
2003 Jan 16 thursday
First snow! I love snow. There is something strange about the snow. It snows on Thursdays. But once it snowed on a Wednesday. I don't get it.

Jan 26, 2003
Aww, the snow's melting! Today's sunday. SCHOOL TOMORROW! (darn) no!!!!!!

July 31, 2004
I went to Michelle's house today. We played our gameboys. I have a gameboy. Michelle's birthday was yesterday. I've seen like all the spongebob episodes.

January 26, 2005
There hasn't been any snow this year. Today it was Chik-Fil-a night. I'm a fifth grader in [teacher]'s class. Mom got back from her 3-day ski trip today. I woke up at 6:00 to play GameBoy.

January 267, 2005
(then there is just no text at all)


I know I can't follow that up but I do have a CD i made in i think 6th grade that we had to make a bunch of fake songs and a name for the CD and put it on the insert. here are my lovely songs from when I was 10/11
Feelings of the Heart
1. Hatred is like a Storm
2. Bottomless Abyss of Despair
3. Crazy, Confused, Cool
4. Thump! went my heart
5. Sadness Raindrop, Madness Storm
6. The Sun is my Happiness
7. My Heart wants to Break Away
8. Elegant, Exquisite Essence
9. Raining on my Sunny Day
10. A'Crying, A'Sighing

I thought I never had a teen emo phase, but it looks like this was it. Bonus - I had to write lyrics for one of the songs.
Crazy, Confused, Cool
Refrain
'Cause I'm crazy, yes I am
I'm mentally insane
'Cause I'm confused, yes I am
They get mad when I complain
'Cause I'm cool, yes I am
Never get upset, never pained...

Stanza
People always talkin' bout me
It's amazing they can't really see
They think I'm just really cool
But they don't know I'm also a fool
'Cause I'm crazy and confused as well
Nobody can ever really tell

(the concept of not having rhyming lyrics was something i was not familiar with)
 
When I was about 8 or 9 I would make what I called, creatively enough, a "video game traveler." Basically a cardboard box that I would make into something sort of like a time machine or spaceship or whatever other kids make out of boxes (complete with marker-drawn cockpit), except it would travel between video game worlds using my child imagination. I'd drag it over the wood floor of the house we lived in at the time and piss the hell out of my mom, who wanted to keep the floors as pristine as possible.
 
Kind of a old thread to necro, but remembered a kid tale and want to share it greentext style.

>be me.
>3rd grade.
>School had no cafeteria; kids ate prepacked lunch in their classroom and then race outside to play.
>Usual lunch for me was sandwich, juice and a sweet.
>One time get a chocolate bar.
>Other kids swarm me and beg for chocolate bar.
>Being way too nice, I give it away.
>Have no chocolate bar.
>This happens again and again the next few days.
>Really want to have my chocolate bar.
>Imtiredofthisshit.bat
>Not sure how to tell them no.
>Mention problem to mom.
>Tells me I don't have to give anything to them.
>Mom suggests licking it immediately after opening it to drive them off.
>Feelemboldened.exe
>Next school day.
>Lunch time.
>Eat lunch.
>Pull out chocolate bar.
>Warplan chocolate liberation is go.
>"I got a chocolate bar, who wants it?"
>"Me!" "Me!" "Me!"
>"Who wants it?"
>"I do!"
>I yell "WELL..."
>Proceed to rapidly lick the chocolate bar all over like a cock-starved crackwhore.
>"...HERE YOU GO!"
>General reactions of disgust from other kids
>Girl who would pick on me yells "YOU'RE A BUM AND I DONT WANT TO MARRY A BUM!"
>laugh hysterically.
>End of school, mom comes to classroom to pick me up
>Girl tells mom I'm a bum for what I did.
>Mom shrugs and holds back laughter.
>Feelsgoodman.jpeg
>No one asks for my chocolate bar anymore.
>Have trollface at lunch for the next few days.
 
Última edición:
Debes iniciar sesión o registrarte para responder aquí.
Atrás
Top Abajo