Shrek 5 - New Trailer Dropped + Possible Future Griefing Thread

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starborn427614 dijo:
They need to focus on pop culture parodies, not replicating memes.
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That is the only thing that will happen. You will get a line-for-line repeat of every single meme from the previous four movies along with a bastardized cover of All Star, probably by Zendaya since she's already cast anyway. You will also be continually bombarded with member berries for its nearly 2 hour runtime. You will have a generic plot about acceptance where Shrek, with encouragement from the supporting cast and funny memes, learns to overcome transphobia and accept his daughter's new identity as a pooner.

You will pay $59.99 per ticket or digital rental, and you will pay $69.99 for a license to permanently stream the movie until it gets revoked. You will pay for repeat viewings to make greasy kike child molesters in hollyweird even richer while you get nothing in return. You will watch the funny memebait, current year references, and re-enactments of scenes from prior films for 2 hours. You will send the hilarious epic memes and GIFs to trannyfaggot groomers on Discord and spam Reddit with AI generated meme templates to get updoots and gold. You will make posts online about how heckin deep and valid the story is and how important this movie is for trans rights. You will shit yourself and cry tears of joy with your fellow buck-broken consoomer brethren as you watch the premiere. Your girlfriends and wives (if you even have any) will be conspicuously absent because they had "other plans". You will watch it over and over again. You will demand a sequel. And you will like it.
 
LifeAlert dijo:
You will get a line-for-line repeat of every single meme from the previous four movies along with a bastardized cover of All Star, probably by Zendaya since she's already cast anyway.
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Shrek 6 entire film leak:

 
LifeAlert dijo:
You will pay $59.99 per ticket or digital rental, and you will pay $69.99 for a license to permanently stream the movie until it gets revoked. You will pay for repeat viewings to make greasy kike child molesters in hollyweird even richer while you get nothing in return. You will watch the funny memebait, current year references, and re-enactments of scenes from prior films for 2 hours. You will send the hilarious epic memes and GIFs to trannyfaggot groomers on Discord and spam Reddit with AI generated meme templates to get updoots and gold. You will make posts online about how heckin deep and valid the story is and how important this movie is for trans rights. You will shit yourself and cry tears of joy with your fellow buck-broken consoomer brethren as you watch the premiere. Your girlfriends and wives (if you even have any) will be conspicuously absent because they had "other plans". You will watch it over and over again. You will demand a sequel. And you will like it.
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Not if I pirate it.
 
Cat tit bingo dijo:
Shrek is once again on the run because rumors are spreading that he has a cult where he forces underage children to resite "Shrek is love Shrek is life" before violently raping them. Now he must clear his name as he tries to keep his family in the dark. He will be helped by his old friends donkey, puss n boots and some new friends including death who is trying to clear his name of being a homesexual porn star who eats people whole and a brand new friend
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Never have I seen a plot go from a perfect 0 to a perfect 10 so quickly.
 
ButterflyBarbie dijo:
My controversial opinion is that I didn't think Shrek 3 was that bad.
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Shrek 3 suffers from filler-like material due to being some form of "transition" between milestones in life. Like legit, the only big things that are considered milestones in Shrek's life at that time is his father-in-law dies, therefore making him the next heir to the throne which he doesn't want, and he's becoming a father which he's anxious about due to some backstory details we never really got outside of "Ogres have bad parenting skills" apparently. Prince Charming feels shoehorned in as a villain, which sucks because I get what they were trying to go for in how he's a royal fuck-up without his mother and he's angry that he couldn't get the throne, but he's not good at being a villain by himself, so here's the surprise twist that Rapunzel is a bad guy all along to prop him up. But she's not interesting, either.

Having Arthur be a clumsy awkward teenager could've made for humorous moments, but it kinda felt like Justin Timberlake couldn't be arsed to act as such or they were just trying way too hard to avoid doing the high school setting. Merlin, outside of the princesses, could've been a memorable dark horse and that's only because Eric Idle is trying(?) but there's only so much hippie new-age jokes you can make with this character and so he sadly remains one-note. I think in terms of what the real-life Merlin could've been like, he might've been the closest we got in parodying that.

Not to mention Donkey and Puss sadly get sidelined in this film even though Donkey could've totally been the one to give Shrek tips on fatherhood for those bro moments that make their friendship be as iconic as it is, but nerp.

It really does feel like the movie went through a bunch of rewrites on top of being an obvious "We need money" ploy, so that's why it's considered the black sheep of the bunch. I dunno, just in general, 2007 was a really weird time for animation that we have never experienced again since. Honestly don't know if Shrek 3 would've come out at any other time and still made the money it did.
 
wtfNeedSignUp dijo:
I'm surprised it's not the consensus. It has better jokes and character moments. 1 id mainly known for subverting tropes, 2 actually build on it.
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shrek 1 is a perfect 10/10 comfy watch movie, there is not one bad scene in it. shrek 2 does some shit cooler than 1 but the fairy godmother and prince charming are annoying as fuck, they add a strong cringe element which i dont typically enjoy in movies. thats why 1 is better
 
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Shrek will be a doofy, bumbling father, and his snarky, nose-ring daughter will be cool and super smart and always correct. I wouldn't be shocked one bit if Shrek says something about "mah swamp," and she chastises him for being a colonizer, and the swamp actually belongs to the wood nymphs or some shit, but it won't be said ironically
 
I just need David Liebe Hart to be a voice in it. Or better yet, on the soundtrack.
 
Jar-Jar Fanboy dijo:
Shrek will be a doofy, bumbling father, and his snarky, nose-ring daughter will be cool and super smart and always correct. I wouldn't be shocked one bit if Shrek says something about "mah swamp," and she chastises him for being a colonizer, and the swamp actually belongs to the wood nymphs or some shit, but it won't be said ironically
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But how many dank meme references will there be?
 
I don't think the movie looks that bad so far, but I'm wondering if Zendaya's agent has ties to the mob with all the movies they've gotten her cast in.
 
Luna hates niggers dijo:
The art style is so bad, Felicia looks like her head got caved in to be quite honest and I can almost guarantee the plot will be something stupid like "rebellious daughter wants to explore the world and find herself, Shrek is overprotective and doesn't want to let her go, they fight bla bla bla there's a shitty resolution with their relationship."
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Your comment just made me realize that warframe is quite literally the only property on the planet to do "Rebellious daughter wants to explore the world and find herself, but father is way too permissive, gives her the go ahead with a smile, and she ends up joining a fucking cult that the father has to then break her out of".

We need more media about kids being fucking retards.
 
Oilspill Battery dijo:
Your comment just made me realize that warframe is quite literally the only property on the planet to do "Rebellious daughter wants to explore the world and find herself, but father is way too permissive, gives her the go ahead with a smile, and she ends up joining a fucking cult that the father has to then break her out of".

We need more media about kids being fucking retards.
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Taken 1
 
Mary the Goldsmith dijo:
I don't hate it but I don't like it either, curious that Zendaya's character is missing from the Teaser, I would assume she'd be front an center
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In that scene everyone except Zendaya is stuck in a prison cell. Zendaya is clearly the one who will save her family's arses with her awesome witch powers. I reckon they've barely changed the original story.
 
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