random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

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I still hate that, when ejaculating, my penis throbs as it spoots out cum.

EDIT:
The competition is magikarps and I'm a nidoking. None of you can compare to my beauty or skill in the bedroom.
 
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that's so stupid it would make some swell copypasta.
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Text:
Who the FUCK are you calling a Virgin? I've been with more people that you could ever count. I've done everything from BDSM to water sports, and I'm far more attractive than you could ever hope to be. I have guys wanting to stick their dick in me every hour, and guess why...? SPOILER ALERT: I'm one of the cutest motherfuckers in the world. I'm like a succubus I can the bedroom, I can seduce just about anyone. I bet if they could, they'd get heart shaped pupils and nosebleeds as well. Even without boobs or a nice ass, I can still get a hoard of hungry guys. Imagine a sexual version of the walking dead. Trying to compete with me is like a Pichu main trying to take down Mew2king, it just won't happen. The competition is magikarps and I'm a nidoking. None of you can compare to my beauty or skill in the bedroom. With that said, fuck off, hold a cinderblock, and jump in the neartest lake.
 
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