Nolan's The Odyssey - Potentially could be epic or an epic flop.

Bro ytf di I watch that cam rip? That is two and a half hours of my morning wasted on this dogshit. I could have spent that time doing something productive before I have to go to work. Hell I could have slept in and it would have been a more productive use of my time. Why the fuck they keep giving Nolan gigs? This nigger's best movie was the Plane Scene and that is only because it was so bad it was funny. Who looks that this bong faggot's filmography and goes
>Yep, I needed to piss away $250,000,000 burgerbux dollary-doos
 
Several pages behind so it definitely must be juicy. I will say that whoever edited this movie must've either been trolling to nake Nolan look bad (based if true), or these are legit the best takes the editor could pull out and is trying to hide bad shots with quick cuts. Something tells me Nolan never once oversaw the editing process and this is the first time he's seen the final cut just as it's getting shipped out to theaters.

Either way, what a trainwreck. Everyone giving positive reviews either got a different cut (lolwut) or they were paid big bucks to fluff it up. Opening weekend was always going to be in Nolan's favor, but watch numbers tank afterwards. The DMCAing proves they're scared shitless about the public finding out ahead of time.
 
I wish a filmmaker would be brave enough to make an adaptation of an ancient work as accurately as humanly possible.

Get people that look how ancient Greeks looked, build accurate Greek ships based on ancient depictions and finds, give the actors actual period-accurate clothing, armor and weapons, and follow the story as closely as you can.

Everything short of making them all speak ἑλληνιστί.
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What's crazy is that if you put a bunch of dudes in appropriate period armor to a modern audience it would have better captured the historical fantasy epic anyways.

Go all in on capturing the accurate armor, boats, etc. Include the schemes of the gods. All that shit.

It'd be a way more interesting movie to play up the fantastical aspects.
 
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Since nothing but DEIversity matters in Hollywoke, Helen should have been played by a white or black man...or both.
 
"If you kill your enemies, they win." -Zeus
I'm sure the Achaeans regretted Troy's destruction while they were counting their loot/balls deep in their Trojan slaves. Is this supposed to be some belated GWOT reference?
I wish a filmmaker would be brave enough to make an adaptation of an ancient work as accurately as humanly possible.

Get people that look how ancient Greeks looked, build accurate Greek ships based on ancient depictions and finds, give the actors actual period-accurate clothing, armor and weapons, and follow the story as closely as you can.

Everything short of making them all speak ἑλληνιστί.
Ver archivo adjunto 9280993
And you don't even need the Odyssey, it can be about a war between two city-states or against centaurs/other monsters if you really want to include the supernatural. All of the mighty beasts those Greek heroes defeated were already feared in the region.
 
There is a 12 year old boy playing the role of a young version of Ellen Page's character...

AND THE 12 YEAR OLD BOY IS MORE MASSIVE THAN HER!
I had to check and the boy is Mason Cufari. This is the latest shot of him on his IMDB page:

Screenshot from 2026-07-16 16-46-43.png

Is Nolan trying to humiliate Ellen?
 
With the little dude and mention of Monty Python I feel like this must have been the conversation in the casting room when Elliot Page walked in.
 
This review is extremely spoiler full. Beware.
c'mon you've had thousands of years to read it already

So is the historical epic just dead now?
I thought it would be simply mediocre but skimming the cam rip this looks genuinely awful. Dark Knight Rises levels of bad acting, choreography and script writing.
What's the Plane Scene of Nolan's The Odyssey?
 
Odysseus is le PTSD-riddled vet who legitimately thinks he deserves exile and damnation because of The Trojan Horse. He claims that the destruction of Troy, and especially the way that Troy was des(troy)ed was an offense unto nature, decency and the laws of Zeus.
This is hilarious. It's classic projection. The movie functions as a cultural Trojan Horse. Casting minorities in major roles from white mythology and sneaking them into Western pop culture in an attempt to undermine it, driven by an imagined, indoctrinated, and undeserved guilt.

It feels like what we're hearing is the writers' subconscious leaking through. They know on some level that what they're doing is heresy and a betrayal of their own people, but to say it out loud would be an unthinkable woke sin.
 
You'll get there, lil' pooner
Did that faggot Nolan rip off Planet of the Apes? It kinda feels like it, and given what I've seen from the rest of this shit heap, I'm inclined to believe it. Nolan is a talentless hack just like the guy that bought the rights to Satoshi Kon's work.
 
Okay, I made it through about 20 seconds and I couldn't take anymore; I had to shut it off.

They don't BANG BANG BANG think it be BANG BANG BANG like it is BANG BANG BANG but it do BANG BANG BANG

He opens the movie with the rapper banging and yelling nonsense and the absurd looking tranny. Nolan just wanted to throw it all in our faces, huh?
 
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Shamelessly stolen from the thread on /wsg/, but mother of God my sides are missing.
Is this supposed to be Odysseus driving away penelope's suitors?
That's the great part of this movie I have no idea what the hell anything is supposed to be in relation to the epic itself. Like who the fuck are the big metal giants with tree magic?
 
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