💀 Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[LightEmittingDiode]

And a new terrifying meme

 

[QueenBurritoSupreme]

We all float down here!

 

[Bassomatic]

Recap as always first then my musings.

Video one. Lucas wonders what the laws are about catfishing and explains what it is, for some one so wise he should know lying is protected by the first amendment. If not tinder would be guilty of more crimes than the entire mafia.

He said he was conned, and it stressed him out. It's not a big deal he has a small dick, she asked for dick pics. He can get penis pills anyway. Then used info that he was hitting on a 16 year old, sure it's true but it's not illegal. He hit on a 16 year old, they should have dated but she was a bigot since he was 36 at the time.

It's not illegal to hit on 16 year olds, it's not illegal to drink at 21. If her parents approved they could have sex. It's not illegal to talk to them (remember this was the girl who mentioned her brother died and Lucas was talking about sex to her)

It's ok to talk about sex to kids, because he stopped when she asked him to stop. She was 15 that girl. He didn't know it was illegal. He also just wanted lunch with that 15 year old. She would be 16 in a week so legal then.

People use this against me. Even though it's been 2 years. I wasn't doing anything illegal. It's not illegal to buy a girl lunch. Catfishing him was illegal (sexting a 15 year old is a crime) You tried to extort me and dick pics and food. You wanted me for food. The offer stands in Spokane, you get dinner if you get me a female. Once we start going out, as long legal age. 18-25 that can have kids, not just sex. He wanted to get married.

He wants to meet a girl, he's tired of being single and everyone is taken aside him. What was done was illegal. He won't press charges, unless he wants to. We can leave that up to fate.

vid 2 Lucas reads.. I didn't bother with this one either @Trainwreck

Video 3 Lucas shows even Jack is a better chef. @Trainwreck really sums it up he puts pretty much flavored salt into cooked pasta with water. Bravo, Ramen noodles how can they ever recover?

Lasty in regards to the cooking blueberry hell. He used that same for his corn dog horror. My assumption it's something he got at a food pantry and thought might as well use it and it has weird combo so it's just gotta be haute cuisine, when really it's more a sin against taste buds.

I'd pay money to see a cook off between, Jack and Lucas judged by Ramsey. No really, I'm talking I'd shell a yearly salary, first born kinda deal to watch that.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Yet another meme

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

Yet another meme

Uh oh. Creeping in the library.

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Uh oh. Creeping in the library.

Wasn't he banned from there?

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

Wasn't he banned from there?

That’s kinda what I thought

 

[Bassomatic]

Yet another meme

Ok let me try to follow this, I am going to be a multi millionaire I am unhappy. I have enough money now to buy fancy dinners.

For a socialist like Lucas maybe he should help me, my daddy isn't a multi millionaire.

 

[Rogowski]

Yet another meme

Even if he did inherit millions of dollars worth of land how would he plan on paying the taxes on his inheritance let alone the yearly property tax?

 

[Rumpled Foreskin]

Even if he did inherit millions of dollars worth of land how would he plan on paying the taxes on his inheritance let alone the yearly property tax?

Well, after he gets rich, he would then publish his book and make a gazillion dollars. I thought that was obvious?

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

Well, after he gets rich, he would then publish his book and make a gazillion dollars. I thought that was obvious?

In his book "Wound" everything is hand-cranked.
Much like his sex life.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Yet another meme

I'd love to see this 12 acres of land. I've see 50 acres run for no more that $250k. I swear his father told him that story to make his kids feel special.

 

[Bassomatic]

I doubt his father lied, I think Lucas has a track record of lying and not understanding value.

Remember he explains being on welfare is worth about 4 working jobs to the economy.

A man who doesn't have a lid to microwave rice a roni reminds us he eats the most expensive thing on menus because he can afford it.

Lucas knows a few million is big money to avg person I wouldn't take his real estate appraisal at face value being he's well Lucas Werner.

 

[WatchtheWorldWern]

In his book "Wound" everything is hand-cranked.
Much like his sex life.

It's not even a story. He basically spends 15 pages writing a wiki of the setting. He literally uses the word "Clockpunk" on the first page.

 

[Aristophanes]

It's not even a story. He basically spends 15 pages writing a wiki of the setting. He literally uses the word "Clockpunk" on the first page.
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So, what kinda of world is Lucas building in ''wound"? One where all the men cannot have sex until they're 35?

 

[Rescuetoast]

I doubt his father lied, I think Lucas has a track record of lying and not understanding value.

Remember he explains being on welfare is worth about 4 working jobs to the economy.

A man who doesn't have a lid to microwave rice a roni reminds us he eats the most expensive thing on menus because he can afford it.

Lucas knows a few million is big money to avg person I wouldn't take his real estate appraisal at face value being he's well Lucas Werner.

Exactly this. He has a weird concept of money because he doesn't work for it. He doesn't know the value of a dollar, he just thinks "yes million dollar is many dollar, better make it a couple to be ultra impressive".

Edit: reformatting

 

[Father Dharmendra Rada]

Lucas's father owns land in his hometown, Montesano, WA. Judging by the location of this and a quick look at real estate listings, he'd have to be sitting on an oil well or a small diamond mine for his estate to be worth even half of what Lucas is claiming.

Also, I'm not sure if this has been said already, but any turkey related dishes cooked by the Wern were made with a turkey that he found in the fridge in his apartment when he moved in. Nasty.

 

[Rogowski]

Any turkey related dishes cooked by the Wern were made with a turkey that he found in the fridge in his apartment when he moved in.

This is peak alpha male right here, obviously a man who would make superior children.

 

[strandedcastaway]

Also, I'm not sure if this has been said already, but any turkey related dishes cooked by the Wern were made with a turkey that he found in the fridge in his apartment when he moved in. Nasty.

To be fair, if the Wern can survive eating that old turkey brick, he might have stronger telomeres than we thought.

 

[WatchtheWorldWern]

So, what kinda of world is Lucas building in ''wound"? One where all the men cannot have sex until they're 35?

Actually, yes. 16 year old girls marrying 35 year old men is the rule of the land. I was listening to it at work, so things were getting drowned out, but I definitely heard that part.

Also, public nudity is common. (Seriously)