Jurassic Park/World megathread - Spared no expense.

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Best jp character

  • Dr Grant

  • Dr Malcom

  • Ellie sattler

  • Owen grady

  • Claire dearing

  • Roland tembo

  • Robert muldoon

  • Paul kirby

  • John Hammond


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The problem with the Jurassic World film trilogy is that it largely once again just repeated what the first three films without any of the charm being present. It danced around the idea of giving us what we always wanted to see but never actually did it. The concept of Jurassic Park presents an interesting concept that promotes a grand problem: what happens when creatures whose extinction enabled us to become the dominant species of the planet return to life?
Nah, the problem with the Jurassic World film trilogy is how they always assume you know nothing about animal behaviour or basic-bitch genetics. Michael Crichton was at least tackling scientific concepts with an earnest attitude in his stories. Colin Trevorrow, on the other hand, clearly has no understanding of the concepts he's trying to tackle, and either failed to consult or heed the advice of anyone with the experience to tell him otherwise. His approach to genetics and animal intelligence is on the level of a crime drama where the fat, lesbian computer lady says, "I just hacked all the internets" - it's stupid and hopes that you're also stupid enough to believe it.
 
Fallen Kingdom and Dominion were trying (and failing) to do a commentary on invasive species with the dinos, this is something that does happen IRL, for example Florida has a big problem with Burmese Pythons, people had them as pets and then just released them into the wild when they got too big and now they're causing a shitstorm in the local ecosystem as they eat fucking everything and the only animals that can reasonably take one out are the gators. This has been going on for years now and despite having a bounty on their heads Florida Man has been unable to purge them, difference is Pythons are very good at hiding in the swamps of the Everglades while a 40 foot T-Rex isn't exactly subtle.
 
Meh, that was kinda underwhelming. The callbacks to the original Jurassic Park felt more like nostalgiabaiting trying to make up for the lack of quality. That scene where the John Williams score plays over the titanosaur scene felt tryhard compared to the original brachiosaurus scene.

Speaking of, while I don't want to come across as a pedantic redditor, it's weird that this movie tries to make the sauropods out to be oversized labradors. Yeah this is sort of a recurring theme in the franchise as a whole but at least in the first movie, it felt kinda believable since the only herbivore they get close to other than the brachiosaurus is a sick Triceratops. And even in the case of the brachiosaurus, the characters were standing some distance away from it in the first scene and were petting from the top in the second scene. Here the situation is completely different since the dude is petting the titanosaurs humongous legs that could crush him like an ant. Not to mention those whip like tail that could hit you with the force of a mach truck.
frozen_runner said:
Was it? Did it have a little black girl doing a parallel bar routine on suspiciously spaced pipes in order to kick a raptor and save the day? Did it have T-Rex running through a city like Godzilla?
That gymnastics scene was fucking stupid but the T Rex rampage was actually one of the more fun parts of the movies.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=7Pf6E8yjMAI
Funny how this video appeared on my feed.
What I'm not willing to let go is the no guns thing. The script has plenty of perfect chances to get rid of guns. Even if you want to say "What's a gun going to do vs. a T Rex", sure..BUT THEN DON'T GO SHOWING THAT A HAND GUN WOULD BE VERY USEFUL LATER ON.
Jurassic Park characters rarely carry firearms that are actually powerful enough to kill a T Rex. If I were up against a 10 ton 17 foot tall carnivorous dinosaur, I'd want an elephant gun on me at the very minimum otherwise I'm better off running.
 
But Fallen Kingdom literally ends with the Dinosaurs escaping into the real world and Dominion had the "We must learn to coexist with them" plot point because apparently humanity is incapable of containing or killing them so they just let them be. Or did you mean an all out human vs Dino war? because in that case yeah this would never ever happen, we have more chances of a Live Action Turok movie being made than a Jurassic Park film doing that.
Yeah but nothing ever comes of it. Heck, the closest we get is a dinosaur causing a traffic jam and locusts. FFS.

Fallen Kingdom and Dominion were trying (and failing) to do a commentary on invasive species with the dinos, this is something that does happen IRL, for example Florida has a big problem with Burmese Pythons, people had them as pets and then just released them into the wild when they got too big and now they're causing a shitstorm in the local ecosystem as they eat fucking everything and the only animals that can reasonably take one out are the gators. This has been going on for years now and despite having a bounty on their heads Florida Man has been unable to purge them, difference is Pythons are very good at hiding in the swamps of the Everglades while a 40 foot T-Rex isn't exactly subtle.
Except that's not what anyone wants. Nobody wants an invasive species commentary. People want a massive scale dino invasion where dangerous dinos rampage through the city and turn it into an all you can eat buffet. They want to see a Spinosaurus go to town and eat a dozen people like French fries. They want the military coming in and getting devoured by raptors. They want a T Rex staring down a military tank and throwing it. They'll never deliver on this. Sure maybe, it's not what this thread wants but it's what the general movie going audience wants and everyone knows it.
 
The concept of Jurassic Park presents an interesting concept that promotes a grand problem: what happens when creatures whose extinction enabled us to become the dominant species of the planet return to life?

Going by real world logic? Nothing, nothing happens, something that the "dinosaurs will make humanity go extinct" crowd seems to forget, is that we already live in a world with lions, tigers, crocodiles and bears, all of those animals are just as big if not bigger than JP raptors, while elephants weight nearly as much as a T-rex, and guess what? all animals i mentioned are critically endangered if not at the brink of extinction, thanks to poachers armed with relatively small firearms, you don't even need an elephant gun when a full mag from an AK-47 does the job.

Let's be real, a few hundred dinosaurs living in zoos are not a threat for humanity, if the dinos become too much to handle they'll be euthanized and end of the story. But i asume that's not what people want in a movie, they want a full action movie where dinos rampage trough a city and the military/armed civilians blow shit up, and i don't blame them, for my entire life i have been waiting for something like "Tremors/Jaws with dinosaurs", you know, a damn dinosaur movie where humans are actually fucking allowed to fight back.

68728003_1117412118452368_1636735921095180288_n.webp


Too bad it seems it's not allowed to happen, as some users already pointed out, JP would obviously go for the "Dinosaurs are like, fucking magical so you can't kill or contain them! so you have to share your land with the refug- i mean, dinosaurs, you silly pleb!" route.
 
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Going by real world logic? Nothing, nothing happens, something that the "dinosaurs will make humanity go extinct" crowd seems to forget, is that we already live in a world with lions, tigers, crocodiles and bears, all of those animals are just as big if not bigger than JP raptors, while elephants weight nearly as much as a T-rex, and guess what? all animals i mentioned are critically endangered if not at the brink of extinction, thanks to poachers armed with relatively small firearms, you don't even need an elephant gun when a full mag from an AK-47 does the job.
JP dinos are way more dangerous and predatory than lions or tigers. Not to say, they're also smarter. Release the raptors in a small town and you have an absolute catastrophe, which wouldn't happen if there is a lion or a tiger on the loose.

But I agree that the effect they expect wouldn't happen. At the end of FK, you see that the T-Rex manages to make it to the zoo. There is no way it made it that far without being shot at least tranquillisers and then neutralized somehow. Not only they are dangerous, they are dangerous for the zoo animals as well. The caretakers wouldn't let them to eat the animals.

Besides, how many were released, anyway? The whole plot that they were all over was dumb and too obviously forced. That little kid only set free a few of them, and most of them would be dead within a month.
 
JP dinos are way more dangerous and predatory than lions or tigers. Not to say, they're also smarter. Release the raptors in a small town and you have an absolute catastrophe, which wouldn't happen if there is a lion or a tiger on the loose.
they still lack human ingenuity and coordination. that's how humanity has survived going against lions and elephants with spears.
sure, the bodycount would by high but eventually the raptors would lose. the first movies work because it was a rag-tag group going up against a whole island, the numbers alone weren't in their favor.

the movies aren't an anthropological lesson tho, people want a monster movie where the monster (dinos in this case) wreaks havoc on a small scale (island, rural town, space station etc.) but eventually get defeated (until the post-credit scene shows it laid some eggs somewhere...).
 
It's funny how even the first movie forgot about this: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Lysine_contingency

I haven't read the first book in a long time but it really made it clear that was a 'sure-thing' failsafe in case they got out. I guess they just forgot about it or had some reason it failed, but I didn't follow the series close enough to know if there was some in-universe throw away explanation about how it didn't matter at all down the line. Did Grant in the first movie say something like 'they'd just eat lysine rich food?' or was that something else. Either way that's a pretty glaring plot hole/contrivance.
 
That's a good question as to why talks of lysine contingency didn't make it into the script, you'd think Crichton would've attempted to put it in when he was helping Koepp since the sex-changing frog DNA did.
they changed it to "all our dinosaurs are female", the dinos eventually dying out again if they don't make new clones. which jeff goldblum countered. hence the big deal about the eggs later proving him right (and grant before that mentioned the frogs changing genders, which iirc tied into the amphibian dna they used for the clones).
simpler to grasp for the normies with less complicated words.

 
I thought that was also the case in the book, that's why the scene where they were looking at spreadsheet of the current dinosaur population was considered a huge "holy shit" moment.
I didn't look through my own link well enough, looks like they did say what I thought, but in 2/3 about it:

However, it is shown in The Lost World: Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park III that the dinosaurs can survive well without the crew giving them Lysine by eating Lysine rich food, like chickens or soya beans and the carnivores could acquire Lysine by eating herbivores.
That's still a lame excuse, making the idea totally useless to bother with. 2 really threw so many rectons in, opened the way for most of the 'science' of the universe thrown out the window.

Oh of course there's an insanely autistic page trying to explain it all: https://comicbook.com/movies/news/jurassic-park-fans-confused-lysine-contingency-explained/ (the answer is as was said, 'life finds a way' of course in the end. One failsafe failing fine, but both? Bit too much imo). Good read anyway there, archive: https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Ds6Zn
 
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Oh of course there's an insanely autistic page trying to explain it all: https://comicbook.com/movies/news/jurassic-park-fans-confused-lysine-contingency-explained/ (the answer is as was said, 'life finds a way' of course in the end. One failsafe failing fine, but both? Bit too much imo). Good read anyway there, archive: https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Ds6Zn
tbh that's just the through point of Jurassic Park. No matter how much time and effort is put into planning and controlling a situation, tiny or perhaps seemingly irrelevant factors will rear their head and cause something somewhere to fuck up.

Anyways, saw the new movie. Overall I'd give it a 7/10. It's very interesting because it felt like a movie that could have come out in the 90s. Kind of a generic action film, but that is strangely refreshing in 2025. Couple cool sequences, but nothing truly iconic or noteworthy.
 
"Life finds a way" is just a romantic way to say "creatures adapt to survive". In the case of the dinos, it's not like they developed the ability to change sex: it was given to them from animals that already did it. So, when the situation presented, the genetic solution activated. In the movie, this was discovered while they were in a catastrophic uncontrolled situation with the main crew of the park being gone. If they had returned the next Monday, they'd have noticed the small dinosaurs eventually and solved the issue. Same for the lysine. Except that if they kept feeding the animals, there was no reason for them to figure out they adapted.

A lot of the things that happened were the result of Nedry meddling with the park systems. The raptors were constantly under vigilance. They told us the raptors were constantly checking too for a chance to escape and Nedry provided it because, as Ian said, he didn't respect them. He didn't think they were as dangerous as they were.

Same for JW. Claire is very casual about how unsafe the enclosure for the Indo was. When she's showing her to Masrani, the glass is still cracked and they didn't replace it.

Every JP/W catastrophe is related to someone (or ones) being an idiot. That's a different issue from the dinos adapting to their new environments. They aren't even real dinosaurs, but genetically modified copies adapted to survive in current day. These idiots made the Indo more aggressive in purpose and as Owen said, that wasn't even a dinosaur.
 
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To no one's surprise, it's almost hit a hundred mil.
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Audiences are just that starved for movies.
Lots are saying this will be the big July movie of the 3-way between it, Superman, and F4. Especially international. I have skimmed this on fmovies, had some ok parts.

I am actively hoping F4 bombs. Superman looks bad too, but pretty ambivilent on it overall. If it succeeds it'll make the snyderbros mad, so that's a plus I suppose.
 
Going by real world logic? Nothing, nothing happens, something that the "dinosaurs will make humanity go extinct" crowd
Before we even get to guns taking down dinos, everything Jurassic World Rebirth said is right. Climate, oxygen levels, would kill these immediately before anything out in the world would.

Besides, how many were released, anyway? The whole plot that they were all over was dumb and too obviously forced.
The movie is retarded and I refuse to accept it's existence.

they still lack human ingenuity and coordination. that's how humanity has survived going against lions and elephants with spears
That's...not necessarily true. The raptors coordinate with each other just fine. That's the trademark of why there were dangerous. The new movie has the Spinosaurus and Mosasaur teaming up to hunt. These things actively are learning on the fly to cooperate even amongst each other.

There's a greater question of what intelligence is, that's never explored and probably should be but that ain't happening any time soon.

Same for JW. Claire is very casual about how unsafe the enclosure for the Indo was. When she's showing her to Masrani, the glass is still cracked and they didn't replace it
Claire was retarded. I'm not a scientist but even I can figure out if you leave an animal of any kind in a cold, lifeless cage by itself in complete isolation, it's going to go insane.

Lots are saying this will be the big July movie of the 3-way between it, Superman, and F4. Especially international. I have skimmed this on fmovies, had some ok parts.

I am actively hoping F4 bombs. Superman looks bad too, but pretty ambivilent on it overall. If it succeeds it'll make the snyderbros mad, so that's a plus I suppose.
It already made 300 mil globally. Which is pretty good nowadays. The last JW did around the same. The only difference is Rebirth has no big names to it other than ScarJo. The budget is a little smaller, it's a more self contained movie and it has NO competition whatsoever with a 4th of July weekend to help it. The only difference is when you look at the box office health overall. Rebirth is competing in a box office far worse than the previous movie. Megan 2 is doing absolutely horrible. Elio is the worst Pixar opening, ever. 28 Years was DECIMATED by word of mouth. The only movie in a running with it is F1, which is a niche movie with a 2 1/2 hour run time which is hard sell if you don't like racing already. Rebirth has a clean sweep in a pitiful box office.

I think Superman and F4 will kill each other. The bad reviews on one will hinder the other.
 
Lots are saying this will be the big July movie of the 3-way between it, Superman, and F4. Especially international. I have skimmed this on fmovies, had some ok parts.

I am actively hoping F4 bombs. Superman looks bad too, but pretty ambivilent on it overall. If it succeeds it'll make the snyderbros mad, so that's a plus I suppose.
I think Superman and F4 will kill each other. The bad reviews on one will hinder the other.
Superman looks stupid as hell. I knew nothing of it other than his dog Krypto was going to be in it until I saw the trailer before viewing Rebirth. And it looks like it was directed by the worst kind of terminally online zoomer stereotype, from everything to the cinematography to the camera angles to the dialogue and sense of humor. It looks nauseatingly paced and obnoxiously flashy, for the kind of people who have absolutely no memory retention.

Then again, maybe that will be its strength, and it will end up being the next Minecraft movie in that way. But I kind of hope not. I think it will be funnier if it bombs.
 
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