Jasper Carewatch - ASPCAck-Ack-Ack

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That right there is a sure-fire way to give your cat some serious hershey squirts and vomiting. If Phil only scoops the shit boxes on his one real-adult day off...AND they are constantly in food-flux with Ja$per? Fuck, that has got to be one of the nastiest smelling barns in existence.
It's cool bruh, he has two shit boxes apparently. So when one gets overflown with nasty piss clumps and shit turds he can simply just go in the other one.
 
Something that bothered me about the post 2k reveal Instagram spread is that all the pictures seem to have been taken on the same day. Surely someone who has had said cat for 9 months or more would have pictures from those past months. Pictures where the cat wasn't wearing the same collar with the bell in the same place. No pic of Je$ter with the Christmas tree? No cute pic of Je$ter playing in wrapping paper Christmas morning? No pic of him on his brand new cat tree momma Brunell bought for him? I am torn between the cat being a recent purchase or it having been hidden until the bandages came off and it had learned how to walk again. For months, while saying they wanted a cat, but could not afford one, it was also mentioned them going to shelters in the area and looking at cats. Why go t a shelter to 'look at cats' IF you have a cat and have had said cat for months and months? Is Je$ter not enough and they felt they needed more variety so they went to visit cats they had no intention of adopting? Did they keep going to shelters on their precious day off together shopping for another declawed cat to bring home and be a companion? Things don't add up to me.
Does Instagram retain metadata? Would the files contain the dates taken? If so it wouldn't be hard to confirm this.
 
If Phil has had Jasper for months, then why does he keep changing his food? It seems he's told his stream twice now that Kat gets him different kinds of foods to "see what he likes". Wouldn't you already know the cat's likes and dislikes after months?
Because Pig likes to show off his new toys like the eternal child he is, and constantly changing Jasper's food allows him to continue to show off his new cat to the world while pretending he truly cares about him. Plus Pig loves to flex with money though he's gotten cagey with that when his less mentally challenged fans left over it.

Pig is simple; and overthinking it just to get a gotcha on a manchild who can't even stand up to an 11 year old girl or say a sentence to stop his fanbase from being doxxed because no wiggle room is autistic.
 
God please don't let this cat die.
If it makes you feel better, when it finally does, Phil will never say a single word about it. Each and every one of us will be able to go on believing that Jasper "Schrodinger's" Cat is still alive and well, even when his owner is streaming from a refrigerator box on the rain-and-neon-soaked streets of 2035 Seattle.
 
If it makes you feel better, when it finally does, Phil will never say a single word about it. Each and every one of us will be able to go on believing that Jasper "Schrodinger's" Cat is still alive and well, even when his owner is streaming from a refrigerator box on the rain-and-neon-soaked streets of 2035 Seattle.

That's the most messed up part about it. It's like you can't even think the most positive outcome of this cat-situation. You just KNOW that if DSP is left in charge of the cats well-being it'll just go to shit eventually and whatever happens to the cat it'll just never ever be mentioned by him ever. Whenever someone bugs him enough about it he will just make up some elaborate story that Jasper became too much and they had to give him away to a new home or something of that nature and that's that.


It's depressing no matter how you view this. Giving DSP anything living to take care of is just a bad idea. Imagine what will happen when khet says shes pregnant and KEEPING IT :cryblood:
 
Since we're talking about the well-being of the cat, a reminder that Phil couldn't even keep plants alive and he thinks spiders grow from Spider Plants.
To be fair, it's a lot easier to ignore plants and hamsters than it is a cat that can yowl in your face or attack your feet or get all up in your business when it's hungry.

As I've said elsewhere in the thread, this isn't so much me playing devil's advocate as it is forcing myself to at least consider the fact that Phil won't neglect an animal to death. The alternative isn't something I want to consider because I can't do anything about it and Phil is unpleasant enough to think about when I'm not thinking about a cat half starving, completely to his knowledge, under his own roof.
 
We all know there will come a day where it comes to light that J2k accidentally slipped outside an opened door never to be seen again. Nothing he could do....right after 'kneading' the back of the big TV in his office causing it to fall over and break.
 
So when Kat inevitably leaves him, will she take jasper with her and leave Phil all alone in his condo to eat hungrymans by himself or will she abandon the cat with Phil a la Leanna leaving in such a rush she left half her belongings? Will this end like trainspotting?
 
So when Kat inevitably leaves him, will she take jasper with her and leave Phil all alone in his condo to eat hungrymans by himself or will she abandon the cat with Phil a la Leanna leaving in such a rush she left half her belongings? Will this end like trainspotting?

It depends HOW fast she gets the fuk out of there. If she pulls a leanna, cat will stay...
Also, it depends on who and where will the next target of hers live.
 
I don't know why people think Phil has anything to do with this cat besides being badgered by his wife into allowing one.

Hell, Kat probably convinced him by saying it could be his stream mascot.

I can almost guarantee the cat is 100% her's and Phil has little to no daily interaction with it.
 
Pig's only influence on the decision was to tell his Golddigger that the cat had to be declawed since he apparently was fucking traumatized when a cat like decades ago made him bleed his own butter, I mean blood. That's it as far as I'm concerned because Pig is a lazy manchild that hates doing any thinking or work.
 
D$P seems hung up on and unreasonably bothered by the idea the cat he picked out at a shelter is anything but a purebred animal. Once again on stream he balked at the question of J2k being of mixed ancestry. Stating firmly that J2k was Not a mixed breed cat, but was "a Domestic Short-haired Tabby". Unfortunately for D$P, 'Domestic Short-haired cat' is the name given to any non-purebred cat with short hair. Tabby referring to the coat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_short-haired_cat
 
D$P seems hung up on and unreasonably bothered by the idea the cat he picked out at a shelter is anything but a purebred animal. Once again on stream he balked at the question of J2k's being of mixed ancestry. Stating firmly that J2k was Not a mixed breed cat, but was "a Domestic Short-haired Tabby". Unfortunately for D$P, a Domestic Short-haired cat' is the name given to any non-purebred cat with short hair. Tabby referring to the coat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_short-haired_cat

Jasper is full authentic Italian.
 
D$P seems hung up on and unreasonably bothered by the idea the cat he picked out at a shelter is anything but a purebred animal. Once again on stream he balked at the question of J2k being of mixed ancestry. Stating firmly that J2k was Not a mixed breed cat, but was "a Domestic Short-haired Tabby". Unfortunately for D$P, 'Domestic Short-haired cat' is the name given to any non-purebred cat with short hair. Tabby referring to the coat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_short-haired_cat

Good to know cat expert Phil didn't know that Domestic short/long hair is the cat equivalent of a mutt.
 
D$P seems hung up on and unreasonably bothered by the idea the cat he picked out at a shelter is anything but a purebred animal. Once again on stream he balked at the question of J2k being of mixed ancestry. Stating firmly that J2k was Not a mixed breed cat, but was "a Domestic Short-haired Tabby". Unfortunately for D$P, 'Domestic Short-haired cat' is the name given to any non-purebred cat with short hair. Tabby referring to the coat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_short-haired_cat
Of course Pig would brag about Jasper's breed and get mad and deny he didn't get a purebred. Based on Jasper's coat and face though, pretty damn sure he's a moggie. He's a cute cat, but he ain't no cat breed.
 
D$P seems hung up on and unreasonably bothered by the idea the cat he picked out at a shelter is anything but a purebred animal. Once again on stream he balked at the question of J2k being of mixed ancestry. Stating firmly that J2k was Not a mixed breed cat, but was "a Domestic Short-haired Tabby". Unfortunately for D$P, 'Domestic Short-haired cat' is the name given to any non-purebred cat with short hair. Tabby referring to the coat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_short-haired_cat

Papa Burnell didn't raise his son to love no filthy mulattoes
 
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