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🎨 ArtcowIconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas
I like the "Fish Schtick" cover with the supposed pirate saying, "Yarrr!!" First, the word is spelled shtick. Second, pirates say, "Arrr!!" Only two blunders out of 23 words. Not bad by the standards of the Bad Boy of College Journalism.
And then there's the picture of the pirate (wearing a yellow rain slicker, for cryin' out loud), which is -- except for the ineptly drawn face and hook in Sweet's version -- a registered trademark of the Gorton's Seafood Co. So we can add trademark infringement to Sweet's previously documented cases of plagiarism and copyright infringement.
His poor mother has put up with him long past any point she should feel obligated. I wonder if she's too afraid to make him get a job, or move out. He does have a history of violent behavior, so I can't really blame her.
I figure she's like Bob was with CWC: no longer has the energy to push him to be self-sufficient, and doesn't have the heart (or capacity for tough love) to force him.
I figure she's like Bob was with CWC: no longer has the energy to push him to be self-sufficient, and doesn't have the heart (or capacity for tough love) to force him.
having escaped punishment for three semesters of sociopathic behavior, ramped up his campaign of harassment to the point that action was finally taken and he was expelled.
I am more curious about what happens to Jon once MS kicks the bucket than I am about what happens to Chris when Barb does. Chris is actually higher functioning than Jon. Let that sink in.
Jon's brothers aren't going to take him in, he's so mentally incompetent that he can't control his tugboat, and his mom's house is detoriating and covered in mold.
He might actually be a candidate for a group home or he might just end up on the streets.
Like I said over in the CIS board, at least Sweet celebrated Thanksgiving in a home with ample food, instead of protesting "Thanks-taking" under a bridge while angrily eating a block of cheese like a certain spudkin...
...although winding up homeless like Phil could be the future of Sweet. Although I don't think Sweet would cover himself in lightbulb, TV, Belch Dimension, and ASU-related tattoos.
A new Belch Blog, wherein Sweet marvels at the terrible behavior of Black Friday shoppers immediately after describing his family's Black Friday shopping endeavor.
So each year after the big Thanksgiving feast, a load of turkey in my belly and a song in my heart, I hit the stores each year with Mom, my brother, and his baby mama, and we load up on hundreds of dollars' worth of electronics, kitchen aids, clothes, and just lately with our new addition@, baby supplies. We have it down to an absolute science, almost a military operation. We decide what we're going to get beforehand, and everybody is then assigned a station. We spread out, assume our post, and jealously guard that item with our lives. When they announce over the speakers that it's six o'clock, we start grabbing and loading up our carts with a fervor. We work in shifts so someone will always be available to relieve whosoever is watching our purchases so they can leap into the fray and grab their fill. We four then meet at the central hub with our booty in tow. I always come away with twenty or thirty dollars' worth of movies-- I tend to lean Pixar-heavy, as well as superheroes and anything with Adam Sandler or a Disney Channel cutie before she turned 19 and her morals went straight out the window.
Jon, in every sense, in every way, in every conceivable fashion: You are what's wrong with America.
Incidentally, he mentions going out with his mother, his brother, and his brother's "baby mama." Yeah, I know, he's an insufferable pig, but I'm wondering, is he accurate? I mean, if he's talking about Tim, didn't Tim get married? And if so, wouldn't that make his "baby mama" his "wife"?
A new Belch Blog, wherein Sweet marvels at the terrible behavior of Black Friday shoppers immediately after describing his family's Black Friday shopping operation.
Jon, in ever sense, in every way, in every conceivable fashion: You are what's wrong with America.
Incidentally, he mentions going out with his mother, his brother, and his brother's "baby mama." Yeah, I know, he's an insufferable pig, but I'm wondering, is he accurate? I mean, if he's talking about Tim, didn't Tim get married? And if so, wouldn't that make his "baby mama" his "wife"?
Maybe the Grand Dragon of the Mississippi Delta has uncovered a drop of Negro blood in his sister-in-law's background. Having a "mulatter" in the family would certainly hinder Sweet's dreaming of a white Christmas.
And then there's his attempt to credit the police with creating the phrase "Black Friday" as a racist term. Ditto for the "Little Monster Crack Whore" dolls. He'll teach those people not to produce dolls for people of color. He's really flaunting his Ku Klux Khristmas spirit all over the place.
Is Sweet trying to be hip there? Maybe should've consulted a young assistant first...
Also, I'm surprised Black Friday is something Sweet seems to enjoy. Black Friday looks like a relatively new phenomenon as it wasn't really at the level it's at now back in the late 90s.
Because if there is one thing Jon knows about, it's working for a living.
Then some boring shit about dish towels he tries to tie in to a reference to Black Friday-related deaths. Nobody was apparently hurt by the two women hoarding dish towels, Jon, so what did this stupid anecdote have to do with the article you linked to, aside from giving you an excuse to mention your shitty comic?
Well, it's comforting to know that if he turned out to be one of those aggressive BF shoppers, you merely need shove him out of the way to make him break into a crying fit.
Hey, did anybody else notice this? It's a big image, so I'm going to spoiler it.
Okay, so, this is from his "Are You Ready ... For Freddy?" journal, the one where he dreams up the tale about running from the pantry to the living room, only to be too late to stop the attackers beating his mother. You know, from that relatively small house he lived in.
What I noticed in the above exchange is that Sweet once again has changed his story about the Lead Pipe Scandal. For those unaware, Jon once posted a story about his brother harassing him with a blunt instrument, so Jon got upset, found a blunt instrument of his own, and ended up serving time, as well as his brother. He's rather light on details in his first telling of the story.
In his second telling of the story, his mother and him were coming home from shopping to find his brother running about in his underwear in a drug-fueled rampage. Jon claims he went out and "dealt" with his brother, while his mom phoned the bobbies. Again, Jon leaves out a number of details, specifically in how he "dealt" with Tim.
In the third telling of the story (which followed quickly upon the second; a few years went between the first and second, unless I'm mistaken), the drug-crazed brother encounter is the same, but there's one difference: Jon himself got a blunt-force weapon (a pipe) and tried to assault his brother with it. Tim disarmed him. Hehehehehehehehe!
Now, here we have this fourth telling of the tale, as light on details as the others, but with one significant difference: No drug-addled craze when dealing with Tim. Apparently, looking at the above quote, Jon was going to attack Tim with a lead pipe for "stealing his money." That's right. Rocket Scientist Sweet just came forward with the admission that he attempted to commit assault against his brother with a deadly weapon, end of. Seeing as how he has such a terrible memory, I could give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he's mis-remembering things.
But you know what? There are three things in life that Jon Sweet will never deserve: A love life, money, and the benefit of the doubt.
I'm looking through Issue 32 of The Belch Dimension. It's painful and disorienting to read, but there's some gems, starting with some Sweet irony:
The comic opens with what can only be described as the Inception of plagiarism: three ALFichus, named and dressed like Alvin & the Chipmunks, sing a song from Animaniacs.
I've said in the past that Jonichu is actually the villain of The Belch Dimension, and Sweet Bro got genuinely confused by this claim and demanded to see evidence. Here you go, Sweet Bro. One of the stories in the comic sees Jonichu and the Stick Squad go to visit a transparent ripoff of Sanford and Son. After some zany hijinks which are possibly interesting to people familiar with 70s television - and a whole page dedicated to an old man breaking wind, and the aftereffects thereof - we reach the conclusion. Jonichu and gang steal absolutely everything from ripoff-Sanford, and the old man dies of a heart attack.
I guess to Sweet Bro, stealing someone's entire livelihood and them subsequently dying is an act of heroism. To normal people, that's basically the act of a villain. Jonichu is a villain.
![:\](/styles/custom/emotes/svg/chris-confused.svg "Confused :\")
