🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[Le Bateleur]

Now on Issue 31.

Here's the strongest indication yet that Jonathan M. Sweet has never had any concept of money, nor adult responsibilities. In these panels, Jonichu and the Stick Squad are collecting cans. Jonichu proudly announces that they've collected cans to the value of $1.40. Since Sweet demonstrates that he knows how little money collecting cans brings it, him citing it at his main source of income either shows how bad he is at lying, or how little money he actually thinks he needs, because he has no grown-up outgoings like rent or utility bills.

Spoiler

In 2007, the Missouri minimum wage was $6.50 an hour. At the weight and value quoted by Jonichu, you would need to pick up 372 cans an hour to make minimum wage - and that doesn't count the time spent transporting the cans to the scrap dealer.

Also in Issue 31:

Spoiler: Antiquated racism

Spoiler: Archaic racism

Spoiler: Butthurt racism

Spoiler: Homoerotic horseplay

Spoiler: Jonichu the villain and his evil crew delivering a 5-on-1 beatdown to a floored opponent

Spoiler: Seriously - even his gang think Jonichu is a heel

Also - nice table manners, Jonichu!

 

[TheUltimatePickle]

These stick people with round baby heads are fucking creepy.

What happened to Pappa Sweets anyway? I'm just going to assume he committed seppeku because of the shame brought upon him by his retarded son.

 

[Le Bateleur]

These stick people with round baby heads are fucking creepy.

What happened to Pappa Sweets anyway? I'm just going to assume he committed seppeku because of the shame brought upon him by his retarded son.

Mack Sweet died in 1997, when Jon was 21-22. He wasn't an old man, in his 40s I believe. I think he had a heart attack.

Jon used his father's death to try to guilt the troll who was telephone catfishing him into having IRL sex, and creeped the troll out to the point she briefly stopped trolling him.

Incidentally, Sweet Bro gets very salty when people suggest his father was glad to die because his son was so disappointing. When ED did it in their article on him, he started a thread on AJM about it, saying they'd gone too far and wanting to get a lawyer and start a lolsuit.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

So it's been 300 pages of the Sweet Thread...

Sweet's golden ticket

I wonder just how Sweet is interpreting our criticisms of him into that "golden ticket." And knowing Sweet, there could be a possibility that he thinks of the Golden Ticket in a more literal sense.

[Issue 31]

That one guy who's clenching his fist(?) while saying "a few days like this, and we'll be on aluminum easy street" kind of looks like he's plotting something evil there... And $1.40 split among the 6 of them?

racism]

That speech the black people in Belich Dimension use there is awfully close to what Sweet claims is a "mockery of the speech of severely retarded people."

Mack Sweet died in 1997, when Jon was 21-22.

Do we know anything about how Papa Sweet and Sweet got along?

 

[Chan the Wizard]

Without confirmation, I'm going to assume the cause of death was shame of having Sweets as a son.
His last words were "why didn't we have an abortion? We had two perfectly normal sons after him. Whatever happens promise me you won't let him use my death to autistically try to guilt a troll into sleeping with him! Promise me!"

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Without confirmation, I'm going to assume the cause of death was shame of having Sweets as a son.

Papa Sweet died in 1997. Just about the same time Sweet was making an ass of himself being too conservative at ASU.

Also, I notice Sweet claimed that this thread (which he wants taken down NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW) would eventually cost someone "their job or their life." So is Sweet saying that he actually has the ability to get someone fired or killed by being driven to madness by this thread? "Golden Ticket to ASU," my ass.

And of course Sweet labels stuff he doesn't like a ploy once again.

 

[Ruin]

Papa Sweet died in 1997. Just about the same time Sweet was making an ass of himself being too conservative at ASU.

Also, I notice Sweet claimed that this thread (which he wants taken down NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW) would eventually cost someone "their job or their life." So is Sweet saying that he actually has the ability to get someone fired or killed by being driven to madness by this thread? "Golden Ticket" to ASU, my ass.

I think it's a veiled threat towards us. The man with windows 98 thinks he's going to dox us and get us fired for cyberbullying or something.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

cyberbullying or something

Kiwis are just talking about someone here. That's covered by the First Amendment. Why does Sweet hate freedom?

Spoiler: but seriously

Sweet would probably claim that it's libel going on here. Libel is only when one knowingly makes false written public statements that are also damaging to the victim's reputation -- and obvious jokes don't count per se.

Of course, Sweet thinks that all the criticisms of him are lies, so I can see how he may think he could sue Kiwi Farms and use the money to get into ASU again -- hence the "giving him the Golden Ticket" thing. Never mind that he's a persona non grata at ASU. Then again, this is the same dude who thought he found a hunk of glass daimond in Mama Sweet's his yard.

 

[AnOminous]

I think it's a veiled threat towards us. The man with windows 98 thinks he's going to dox us and get us fired for cyberbullying or something.

I thought he was going to come after us with a bone knife.

 

[Le Bateleur]

Kiwis are just talking about someone here. That's covered by the First Amendment. Why does Sweet hate freedom?

Spoiler: but seriously

Sweet would probably claim that it's libel going on here. Libel is only when one knowingly makes false written public statements that are also damaging to one's reputation -- and obvious jokes don't count.

Of course, Sweet thinks that all the criticisms of him are lies, so I can see how he may think he could sue Kiwi Farms and use the money to get into ASU again -- hence the "giving him the Golden Ticket" thing. Never mind that he's a persona non grata at ASU. Then again, this is the same dude who thought he found a hunk of glass daimond in Mama Sweet's his yard.

Yeah, Sweet Bro isn't a big fan of the First Amendment when it isn't him doing the Speech.

He's also fond of declaring people guilty without due process or trial by jury, demanding that they be immediately punished for their crimes - so he's clearly not a fan of the Fifth or Sixth Amendments either.

In summary, Jonathan M. Sweet is un-American.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Also, I notice Sweet claimed that this thread (which he wants taken down NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW) would eventually cost someone "their job or their life." So is Sweet saying that he actually has the ability to get someone fired or killed by being driven to madness by this thread? "Golden Ticket to ASU," my ass.

This is really no different than Sweet's ridiculous dramatics when he suggested that his inability to locate and talk to "Ashleigh" once again would lead to someone getting killed, and to The Herald having "blood on it's hands" because they wouldn't grant him an interview to discuss it. Consider also the laughable, cut-from-whole-cloth notion of a crazed fan getting him kicked out of school because said fan was angry that his columns no longer ran. Heck, the bit that @Le Bateleur posted above, where the "Monty" character attempts to stab Stick Jon in the head, despite the fact that (1) the targeted victim is an invulnerable superhero, and (2) a successful attack seen by multiple witnesses would see that character landed in jail, is another example. If I'm not mistaken, that character was based on a teenager that used to "bully" Jon, reportedly. Of course, it's not enough for the victors to bask in their glory and feel good about a job well done, no. They have to wish death on the attacker that they clearly and viciously beat.

Jon Sweet is a pathetically weak individual with a yellow streak a mile long. Once locked in a conflict, he can't keep up his end of it, and once defeated, he can't accept defeat, so he goes into these wordy theatrics about violence and killing to soothe his ego. Moreover, he tries to keep those empty rants in places where he feels he's safe to do so, where he doesn't think anyone will challenge him. Look at the journals and deviations he's posted where @DrChristianTroy , et al. challenge him. It's challenge-limp-wristed defense-challenge-weak slap-challenge ... and then Sweet leaves. He never answers. He has run away from arguments on his own journal.

In short, Jon talks a big game about going after people with over-the-top violence and life-disrupting consequences, because talking is all he can do.

 

[MrsFrizzle]

The woman he claims is "Ashleigh" is in the telephone book.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

how little money he actually thinks he needs

Didn't he pay for college loans for awhile though? Still, he thinks it's feasible to live at ASU for life.

 

[Le Bateleur]

Didn't he pay for college loans for awhile though? Still, he thinks it's feasible to live at ASU for life.

If he did take out loans for college, I can't see how he'll have paid them back. He's never had a paying job (other than possible the Herald if they paid him there), and his adventures in self-publishing will have cost him more than he got back in royalties.

Unless he picked up a truly amazing number of cans, I can't see him paying off the loans. Isn't there a minimum income threshold before repayments kick in? I'm guessing his "miserly" wouldn't be above the threshold if there is one.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

cans

Just what is it with Sweet and making money from discarded cans anyway?

Also, if people didn't litter anymore, there goes a potential source of income.

 

[Le Bateleur]

Just what is it with Sweet and making money from discarded cans anyway?

Also, if people didn't litter anymore, there goes a potential source of income.

I think it's probably rooted in a childhood autistic routine.

When Sweet was a kid, he'd apparently roam the neighbourhood with an old shopping trolley he'd decorated with ribbons and stuff, picking up cans and other litter. I think he also said he wore the yellow cape that Jonichu wears, and a Button Cap of Fail.

 

[Holdek]

Mack Sweet died in 1997

I have to admit, "Mack Sweet" is a pretty awesome name.

 

[Le Bateleur]

I have to admit, "Mack Sweet" is a pretty awesome name.

It is. Sounds like the lead character from a blaxploitation film

 

[AnOminous]

It is. Sounds like the lead character from a blaxploitation film

Mack Sweet Back's Badassssss Song.

 

[Holdek]

IIRC, Sweet's "golden ticket" back to ASU is that we somehow uncovered a conspiracy by his college dean of faking Sweet's diagnosis of mental illness to keep him from returning to school.