🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[Chan the Wizard]

New deviation: https://archive.is/iXJIA
Picture warning!!!

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Damn, it really is dark in there. If the walls weren't that dark ruddy color, maybe it wouldn't be so dark.

Also, a toilet.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

New deviation: https://archive.is/iXJIA
Picture warning!!!

"This is a pretty funny episode"

No it isn't. I can tell without even looking. Other than saying a hairpiece would cause women to "approach me freely" like back in his days at ASU, Jon has never said anything funny.

And that pic on the top right? If he held that notebook in front of his chest, I think we'd get a pretty good idea of what he looks like when getting his mugshot taken.

Incidentally, anyone notice that he refers to himself as "Sweetchuck" in this journal? Interesting. Perhaps he'll call himself Thumbskull next.

 

[NobleGreyHorse]

How carefully do you think he sat there adjusting his shirts until only the letters HARLOT were visible on the t-shirt? How clever do you think he thought he was for that?

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

How carefully do you think he sat there adjusting his shirts until only the letters HARLOT were visible on the t-shirt? How clever do you think he thought he was for that?

I wouldn't be surprised if that was deliberate. Also, I know I go on about this a lot, but you pointing out the shirt caused me to zoom in a bit on the upper-right pic. Sweet's neck crank is rather prominent here. The line between his head and his shoulders is clearly diagonal. His pose looks rather relaxed, leading me to believe that he doesn't choose to hold his head that way.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

I thought that the panel diagram in that notebook was part of the Ishtar Gate for a moment.

Anyway, at least that journal entry doesn't come across as antagonistic or spiteful.

 

[Shadow Fox]

"Sittin' bucket."

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

. . . hey there. Hi, there. Ho, there . . .

From the Mickey Mouse March, theme song of TV's Mickey Mouse Club, which first aired 20 years before he was born. Sweet is one hip-to-the-jive hepcat when it comes to current pop culture references. (The commas, of course, don't belong. He can't even punctuate a children's song correctly.)

The fact that he calls pages filled with text "storyboards" certainly helps to explain why his cartoons are so inept. The panels are apparently not planned at all. It's obvious that he doesn't even know what a storyboard is.

The fact that he treasures a tiny, rubber commode also comes as no surprise.

"Sittin' bucket."

In this entry, he has decided to adopt the persona of some kind of rural "character." He's probably unaware that he comes across as a mildly retarded Uncle Remus.

 

[John Titor]

He replied to @DrChristianTroy again:

So you always had a weird looking face. Good on you for getting through childhood with that mug.

And yet I was loved and accepted by everybody. Things were a lot different back then. Now, if you don't look, think, dress, or act a certain way, people constantly marginalize you and think it's okay to emotionally abuse and physically assault you, play cruel pranks on you, take your stuff, and take advantage of you constantly. And this is what the people in power call "progress"? Pfft. Who needs it?

Bullying did not exist before Progressives, gotcha.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

"And yet I was loved and accepted by everybody."

That's because you were a child, Thumbnuts. Nobody's going to be deliberately mean to a outwardly retarded-looking kid, unless they're crazy too. Then again, I suspect that your so-called friendships and adventures weren't nearly what you currently make them out to be.

So, seeing as how high school was a "nightmare," and you even had your very own bully in the early 90s (so much so that he inspired the creation of one of your characters), tell me: when did 'now' become 'back then'? It seems that people have been smacking you around (literally and figuratively) for quite some time before 'now'.

Can't blame 'em, though. I'm a gentle person, generally, and hate to see people abused - but I'm sure there's a lot of fun to be had in making Jon Sweet break down into tears.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Whether or not I like Sweet's appearance, I don't really make fun of it now, but I also don't think it's a good idea to go out in public with a really um... unique sense of fashion.

Bullying did not exist before Progressives, gotcha.

If Sweet were to somehow travel back in time to Puritan America in the 17th century, they might've thought he was a wizard or something. But nah, it's totally modern liberalism that invented bullying.

Spoiler

He replied to @DrChristianTroy again

Where is this? I'm not seeing it in the latest Belchblog.

 

[Adamska]

And yet I was loved and accepted by everybody.

I believe your turn of events as much as the college delusions you still try to peddle when you can't stand the fact you're a repugnant fuck. Remember when you thought that Ashlaaay wasn't a troll? How about the idea that somehow people liked you shitting up events by shouting awkward racist humor? Or how about when you thought pennies and intentionally fucked up nudie posters were gifts instead of pronks and insults? Oh, how about my favorite; that it was politics that got you kicked out rather than the fact that you were too retarded to actually reign in your spastic shouting and dickish behavior like you did in class?

Things were a lot different back then.

Yeah; TV reception was shittier, the internet was a sluggish mess if it existed at all, teaching was at least 10 times shittier back then, lightbulbs ate dozens of dollars a year due to inefficiency, solar power was not as viable, cars still used lead, crime rates were higher, and other terrible things. It gets even worse when you go further back lol.

Now, if you don't look

When you have a thumbface; that is unfortunate. When you contort your face to look like a shrieking pile of bad DNA, or decide to have a neckbeard that looks like pubes, then you just make people go "oh god what a dork".

think

But you don't think Jon. You literally site there silently and fume about how you don't know how to do stuff toddlers can do. You can't even bother to google or ask others how to do things.

dress

Dressing in purple pants and a cap full of boy scout badges does not a responsible adult look. A manchild welfare queen on the other hand though...

or act a certain way

You mean like threatening people for twenty years straight with violence? Oh, how about shouting at the top of your lungs stupid shit nonstop throughout a college event and ruining everyone else's experience? What about cussing out a photographer when most people would just wince if the lights go bright. How about using your dead dad to beg for sex, or the time you let your mom get nearly beaten to death by thugs? All of these things are things you know gets you in trouble during class, but are too retarded to apply fully to life.

people constantly marginalize you and think it's okay to emotionally abuse and physically assault you

Is this before or after you tried to beat your brother to death with a pipe? Oh, how about when you stalked some poor bitch for like 20 years? Oh, oh, how about that one time you abused the kindness of others to use them as human shields? What? That don't apply to you? k.

play cruel pranks on you

And chewing loudly to get attention isn't dickish? What about leaping into random conversations like an asshole to make it all about you?

take your stuff

Is this before or after you retardedly signed your name on all of your cheques like the nonfunctioning imbecile you are?

and take advantage of you constantly

Like you do the US guvment and your ailing crippled mother?

And this is what the people in power call "progress"?

Nope. I call progress an improvement of something from its prior incarnation. And you call yourself an English major *wags finger*

Pfft. Who needs it?

You. Without progress, you'd have been dead.

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

So, seeing as how high school was a "nightmare," and you even had your very own bully in the early 90s (so much so that he inspired the creation of one of your characters), tell me: when did 'now' become 'back then'? It seems that people have been smacking you around (literally and figuratively) for quite some time before 'now'.

Aside from intentionally going far out of his way to look and act as weird as possible, Sweet almost certainly did something to actively provoke this so-called bully. As we know too well, his horrifying behavior is constrained by neither the laws of God nor the laws of man nor the bounds of simple human decency.

I'm gonna guess that one day in the locker room the "bully" caught Sweet --bug-eyed and slack-jawed -- admiring the Southern sun's efficacy at "ripening up" his "parts."

The Chair is willing, however, to entertain other explanations.

 

[AJMLurker]

The Chair is willing, however, to entertain other explanations.

I hold the belief that until Sweet Bro got an ass-whoppin' in either middle or high school, he actively farted in class and shared his interest in farting with the other kids. Sweet Bro has shown an inability to shut the fuck up about farting, shitting, and just the human anus in general.

If not that, he might've said something to tick off those urban dark-skin people he fears so much. Our Sweetian Hero is quite self-unaware. Needless to say, the ass-whoppin' was well deserved and helped our hero contain his powerleveling to an extent.

 

[DrJonesHat]

I hold the belief that until Sweet Bro got an ass-whoppin' in either middle or high school, he actively farted in class and shared his interest in farting with the other kids. Sweet Bro has shown an inability to shut the fuck up about farting, shitting, and just the human anus in general.

If not that, he might've said something to tick off those urban dark-skin people he fears so much. Our Sweetian Hero is quite self-unaware. Needless to say, the ass-whoppin' was well deserved and helped our hero contain his powerleveling to an extent.

I agree with you that Sweet was no doubt the recipient of a corrective beating, but I would wager it occurred sometime in elementary school. He probably got the shit kicked of out him more than once for being such a sperg. He probably kept it reeled in from that point until he graduated high school. Once he hit college, he probably figured that he was free from bullies since he was all grown up now. Even a third-tier university like ASU would expel someone for outright assault and battery, so retribution for Sweet's demented behavior was limited to the acts he misinterpreted as gifts. I'm honestly surprised that no one has physically retaliated against Sweet for his near 20 year campaign of harassment.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

[events]

So how exactly was Sweet at events? I know that according to the Doctor's sources (which Sweet angrily wants to track down), Sweet would pretty much always show up to them, and would make it difficult for others to enjoy them. According to them, what exactly would Sweet do to make an event not enjoyable? Just yell out stuff? What kind of stuff exactly (I think they said it was race related)?

 

[Trombonista]

The Chair is willing, however, to entertain other explanations.

He hit on the "bully's' girlfriend/little sister?

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

I hold the belief that until Sweet Bro got an ass-whoppin' in either middle or high school, he actively farted in class and shared his interest in farting with the other kids. Sweet Bro has shown an inability to shut the fuck up about farting, shitting, and just the human anus in general.

If not that, he might've said something to tick off those urban dark-skin people he fears so much. Our Sweetian Hero is quite self-unaware. Needless to say, the ass-whoppin' was well deserved and helped our hero contain his powerleveling to an extent.

I'm going a bit off subject here, but it maybe tangentially related: Did you ever feel that Sweet was being inappropriate (read: a lecherous perv) with the ladies of AJM? It seems to me that he would feel free and clear to be as nasty as he wanna be there.

 

[Adamska]

So how exactly was Sweet at events? I know that according to the Doctor's sources (which Sweet angrily wants to track down), Sweet would pretty much always show up to them, and would make it difficult for others to enjoy them. According to them, what exactly would Sweet do to make an event not enjoyable? Just yell out stuff? What kind of stuff exactly (I think they said it was race related)?

I know that the event where someone threw a trash can at him, he was going full sperg and repeating at the top of his lungs Andrew Dice Clay jokes or something like that. I imagine it was mostly shit like that myself; he probably thought repeating jokes like a middleschool autist was the height of wit or something like that.

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

I'm going a bit off subject here, but it maybe tangentially related: Did you ever feel that Sweet was being inappropriate (read: a lecherous perv) with the ladies of AJM? It seems to me that he would feel free and clear to be as nasty as he wanna be there.

Admittedly it was a while since I read the backlog of the thread, but I think @Treenbeen has mentioned that Sweets is occasionally really dumb with her and the other female members.