How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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-they’re genuinely wise in some way
-they’ve been through what you’re going through and may be able to offer perspective from further down the line, or practical tips.
Ive really been trying to find this all my adult life. The more "unique" (in a bad way) your experiences are the harder that is to find. Every single friend I know like that is addicted to either alcohol or drugs and severely mentally ill. Two have given themselves organ damage and will die early even though they have sobered up. It fucking sucks to go outside and see every older "version" of you is still dealing with same old shit and mainlining heroin on top of that.

Speaking of heroin, I'm dealing with transferring a prescription between pharmacies when moving, and that's apparently not easy with opioids. If these mfers fuck me over and I have to go out buy street drugs to escape cold turkey again I will sue these faggots into oblivion I swear to god.

Good news is I've talked to my doctor and I'm getting prescribed prazosin or something along these lines. Not another addictive med at least.
 
The Eastern Euros are good - good education system, good English, no issue with them at all, they’re excellent. But they’re window dressing and the bulk of the work has gone to India which is going to be disastrous.
I heard that Eastern Europeans are more direct with feedback and work ethic than Americans.
 
Listening to Isn’t She Lovely by Stevie Wonder and my home country’s playing in the soccer thingy majigy, just SURROUNDING myself in racial self love rn. Only thing that’d make this better would be eating a traditional African dish, but I’m not, I’m eating ramen. Cause it’s delicious.

@The Lawgiver Checking in on you, how’re you doin?
 
@The Lawgiver Checking in on you, how’re you doin?
Same as usual aside from watching people spin out with unfunny shit everywhere lmao

Managed to wake up at like 8 AM-ish which is a positive but I'm still feeling kinda burnt out and dead with a slight headache as I figured I'd end up being. Whenever I wake up enough I'm likely going to try and grind out several drawings to unknowable success or failure since it came out really sloppy last I tried when I was like this.
 
Listening to Isn’t She Lovely by Stevie Wonder and my home country’s playing in the soccer thingy majigy, just SURROUNDING myself in racial self love rn. Only thing that’d make this better would be eating a traditional African dish, but I’m not, I’m eating ramen. Cause it’s delicious.

Jesus, can you just be neutral towards your own race like a sane person. I don't get this drastic shift between being an Aunt Ruckus who wants to lynch coons all day to talking about how a job isn't going to get back to you because of your melanin or how much you're enjoying seasoning your food.
Maybe im being a dick but I see that as a giant issue. Just listen to Innervisions because it's a good album, not because you have to fight some delirious self racism with black pride.
 
Today was the hottest day in recorded weather history in my country. I spent most of my Saturday, as I am wont to do, with my parents and their house is absolutely fucking awful during summer. At one point I felt like fainting, so I excused myself and retreated to my old room in an attempt to get some air, opening every single window on the second floor in a vain attempt at creating some draft. Ha ha, fuck you PetiteFeet, not a single wind was stiring in their part of the city.
I made a soba noodle salad but I fucked up the dressing, rather than making a new batch, because the recipe called for way, way, WAY too much miso. And the flavours of the salad dressing also didn't pair off very well with the grilled mackerel my father made, but it was edible and the fish was delicious.
Strawberry season means I am eating a minimum of 2 pounds of strawbs a week. Yummy.

Other than that, I fear my throat issues are coming back. I need to get a doctor's appointment but I fear they won't be able to see any issue unless I strain myself to the point of muteness. And who wants to overrun their doctor, not me. I guess I'll just try to cough more and clear my throat less. Oh, and no singing along to music. Or singing in the shower. Or when I cook, etc.
That's okay, I'm not much of a singer anyway (:_(
 
Same as usual aside from watching people spin out with unfunny shit everywhere lmao

Managed to wake up at like 8 AM-ish which is a positive but I'm still feeling kinda burnt out and dead with a slight headache as I figured I'd end up being. Whenever I wake up enough I'm likely going to try and grind out several drawings to unknowable success or failure since it came out really sloppy last I tried when I was like this.
You draw? Could I see some of your drawings if you don’t mind? :)
Jesus, can you just be neutral towards your own race like a sane person. I don't get this drastic shift between being an Aunt Ruckus who wants to lynch coons all day to talking about how a job isn't going to get back to you because of your melanin or how much you're enjoying seasoning your food.
Maybe im being a dick but I see that as a giant issue. Just listen to Innervisions because it's a good album, not because you have to fight some delirious self racism with black pride.
I probably should’ve clarified, I’m happy cause I usually can’t bring myself to do this stuff. It’s not like I wanna surround myself with black pride, I’m just happy I can listen to a song by a black guy and be excited for a sports event with my country without feeling ashamed. Like I’m happy that I’m getting to a point where I can stand that without thoughts of self hatred, not like I’m forcing myself to as some sort of therapy. Should’ve clarified, sorry.

It’s not like I’m forcing myself to season my food CAUSE I’M BLACK YA’LL I’M BLACK YA’LL but rather I’m happy that I can just cause… I wanna, and not see it as a big deal. And not even think of it that much, and forget about it in about a minute. I guess that’s racial self love to me, just not caring and being neutral. I’m happy I’m slowly getting to a point of neutrality.
 
You draw? Could I see some of your drawings if you don’t mind? :)
Technically my current pfp counts (though technically jammed through an image-to-video thing and then manually spliced and redrawn over into something more coherent in the spots it distorted) but I've posted a bit in the art thread over the years, the recent few being just WIPs or finished pfps since I've been too dead tired due to a mix of life shit and weird sleep schedule.
 
My aunt had a vow renewal and I’m depressed now after going to it. It was as holy as the Ganges river, they have always been the artsy fartsy hippy types and the entire thing was so fucking weird. It was supposed to be at a church but they changed it last second to their garage, which luckily was freshly painted if no trim or flooring. They had a “traditional” ceremony that seemed to draw inspiration from a dozen different cultures and religions, the sermons were stilted and strange and meaningless and they filled tradition in the weirdest ways that didn’t make sense, like when they did the offering they made a Holy Wine Americano (half wine, half water) and I am eternally grateful that only my aunt, her husband, and the best man and best woman had a sip because the lady priest/shrine maiden didn’t wipe the cup after each of them took a sip. Then the after wedding part had a bunch of their friends doing a slam poetry night/bad music thing which was fucking weird and uncomfortable and it is like we were hostages to a bunch or borderline narcissists. The food was okay but the venue they used didn’t even bother to sweep after it was used last and there was what looked to be like an entire brownie under a table when we got there.
 
I tried a white monster for the first time a few months ago and actually liked it. I never really had energy drinks growing up, the only one I ever tried was Red Bull and it tasted like cough medicine. Now I've been trying some of the other zero sugar flavors from time to time and they're pretty good! Who knew?? I like the white one and I really like the America ones they have for the 250th (of course my favorite flavor would be a limited time flavor, just my luck, right?) I'm drinking an "ultra vice guava" right now and it's pretty good. Kinda wish they had zero sugar versions of all the flavors so I could try all of them, I don't like doing full sugar. Makes my teeth hurt.
 
Navigating between health shit and a shitton of work, somehow navigating between these issues at hand.

Speaking of work, talks with management about being transferred to another factory (in a town that won't be across the country from anyone I know) isn't going anywhere. They literally expect me to remain at my position until my retirement (we're talking 30 years if the rumors about raising the retirement age come true). I'm trying again every month to ask about internal mobility as the job market is pretty much fucked all around in my country.

This are still bretty gud with Miss Números but I have a feeling the next 2 months are going to test if this long distance thing is going to really work as we'll have much less opportunities to see each other.
 
I had a minidisc player and mix discs. And an iPod, who h was the pinnacle of good tech. Why can’t we have click wheel Black and white lcd iPods any more?
My first device that could play mp3s (that wasn't a desktop computer) was some Motorola flip phone that could hold a few dozen songs. My second was a 1st Gen iPod Nano which had barely any display at all, was about the size of a quarter, and I got free when I bought the original MacBook. It was awesome so of course I lost it at some point. 4GB also seemed like an astounding amount of storage for such a small thing at the time.
Strawberry season means I am eating a minimum of 2 pounds of strawbs a week. Yummy.
I missed strawberry season but peaches are looking good.
Kinda wish they had zero sugar versions of all the flavors so I could try all of them, I don't like doing full sugar. Makes my teeth hurt.
There's a 75% reduced sugar Gatorade I'm liking. I was surprised to find stevia in the ingredients because I usually hate that shit.
 
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