Funniest line from an lolcow?

This is a personal favorite from my first thread: “I was gently assaulted by a negro man.”
 
Pretty much anything Jace or Terry said.

Also, this little tweet from a forgotten lolcow...

"I may be a hikkikomori, but at least I ain't a whiny Social Justice Warrior!"
-Todd "N9OGL" Daugherty
 
not so much a line as a paragraph:

I know this is most likly pointless but i want my thing down plus im pretty sure you need permssion also there mentioning my family which rember what happen when u messed with somone with austuism plus that pic of my fursona is not allowed up unless i give permision or if the one that created it said you guys can i am getting cops involve and a cyber group to track there ip as well so it ether goes for good or those people are gona be involve and you guys are pathitic for not showing to a court case that goward joshua coner moon cause i read your thing and i know that the person i can try and sue or charge or whatever i can try and i will on that to do with THIS blog and you guys are the bigest hyprocates everyone has fetishes some of wroser fetish then you think and u or anyone cant say u have no fetishes i took screen shots each time something shows up so i have more prove to show later on to the cops so ether man up and do vidoe with all of yous showing your face or take my thing down yes i have disabilty a learning disabilty and yes i have angry probly but im not a pedo and i acctully do other stuff and have money so there the three option and you probly are gona be a pussy n not the vidoe im unsure about the other option but thats all bye
 
Pick a line from the Nostalgia Critic's review of The Room. It's glorious.
 
"Could you please advise what legal process you require for this request and also confirm preservation of the data requested pending legal process."
 
Well, just like a computer, my brain is random. It picks up memories at random. I cannot simply access them sometimes, even though, most of the time, I can. But sometimes I can't, and they later come back to me at random. -Chris Chan.. Source: Random Access humor page on the CWCwiki

and of course... JULAYYY!
 
"Animals know exactly what they need to to decide whether to have sex with something, and that is: sex feels good." - Eevee
 
Considering everything that follows in the thread. This one gets me everytime

Cowlick dijo:
Called that ASSumption by all of you (accent on the first three letters due to the -holes you all are, as well as the holes you have proven must be in your heads) for the shit that it is/was.

Also, while I am not TJ/Tim, I am connected to him through a few online areas, & he has told me he is already in contact with Tumblr about shutting-down the Tumblr area you have named after & based on him (without requesting permission or allowing him any input). However, this contact will cease if I let him know you are removing it, thereby requiring him to take no further steps.
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Also from the SIEGECULTURE thread. This one always gets a chuckle

Rape is a great guy
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