Chris turns 40

[Dr. Silvestrechu]

40 years old and only person you have had sex with is your own mother...

I wish we get to have clips from him in court.

I'm surprised nobody ever brought up the missed opportunity of Chris not filming sex tapes with Barb.

 

[Cletus Kasady]

40...so Chris is a Cougar now

That just sent a chill up my spine while simultaneously making me want to vomit.

Yeah add in the hideous yellow sonic medallion, the fact that his shirts were several sizes to small, and it really shows how ridiculous he looked.

You forgot the pants with a suspicious stain on the crotch.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

40...so Chris is a Cougar now

Null had betta watch out. Pristine Christine will be outta prison soon, and her loins will go into combustion like a giant star just about to turn into a black hole.

I'm surprised nobody ever brought up the missed opportunity of Chris not filming sex tapes with Barb.

A night in Barbland doesn't haven't the same ring to it.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

If it wasn't for the hooker Chris would be the Saruman of this realm. And there's the possibility that the Hooker was a lie.

If Chris was going to be Saurman, who would have been his Wormtongue? I'd say it would've been Jack Thaddeus.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

If it wasn't for the hooker Chris would be the Saruman of this realm.

Chris would have had enough power to portal out of jail if it weren't for that hooker.

So in a way, the hooker was one of the biggest trolls in denying Chris becoming a wizard?

 

[Sharkbait]

So in a way, the hooker was one of the biggest trolls in denying Chris becoming a wizard?

Well I guess the easiest way to fuck Chris' life up is to give him what he wants for a reasonable price. That's how Sega got him

 

[ToroidalBoat]

dreadful high pitched Southern accent

Chris' voice is as insufferable and inhuman-sounding as the way he writes.

And what's weird is that both weren't always so bad, like back in Manchester.

 

[Sharkbait]

Chris' voice is as insufferable and inhuman-sounding as the way he writes.

And what's weird is that both weren't always so bad, like back in Manchester.

I'm a fairly trusting man despite my military background, but Chris very voice screams "deviant alert, hide your grannies jerks!"

 

[Ophelia]

Chris' voice is as insufferable and inhuman-sounding as the way he writes.

Think of Chris’s voice.
Now think of how the kind of person cosplaying Chris at a con must sound.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Think of Chris’s voice.
Now think of how the kind of person cosplaying Chris at a con must sound.

So like Liquid Chris but higher pitched?

 

[Sharkbait]

So like Liquid Chris but higher pitched?

And orders of magnitude creepier I'd suppose

 

[Hollywood Hitler]

I guess Bob didn't notice those mail packages from Adam & Eve, or maybe Chris was 'clever' and told him they were sent to the wrong address. I don't know how someone would be that oblivious, even for the fact that Bob was in control of Chris' bank account for a short time. Maybe Bob knew and just did not want to know any further. If I was Bob and knew about it, I'd be worried my sped of a son might choke on some thing or destroy his rectum with the anal beads or dildo. Come to think of it, I don't think Bob ever had the inclination to teach Chris about sex. Maybe before Chris' date with Emily, but I can't say for sure since there's nothing recorded on the CWCki about it.

I don't think Adam & Eve slaps their logo on their packages that says "Big Black Dildo Inside: Handle With Care!"

If they did, nobody would order from there.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

I don't think Adam & Eve slaps their logo on their packages that says "Big Black Dildo Inside: Handle With Care!"

If they did, nobody would order from there.

Obviously not. But If Bob did his due diligence, he'd known. As I stated, Bob temporarily took control of Chris' bank account. At some point, as Bob was reading the statements, he would said "what the hell's this Adam and Eve" and made a phone call. Also, if Bob even received Chris' mail, Adam and Eve's logo would be stamped on the shipping label. As smart as Bob's made out to be, when it came to his own son, he was dumb or at the most blissfully ignorant.

 

[Hollywood Hitler]

Adam and Eve's logo would be stamped on the shipping label.

Doubt it, the invoice inside the package, sure. But i doubt it would be stamped on package outside.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

Doubt it, the invoice inside the package, sure. But i doubt it would be stamped on package outside.

Logo or not, I still say that a quick search and a phone call, and Bob would have had 'The Talk' with Chris. Would that deter him from ordering sex toys in the future? Probably not.

 

[Jack Awful]

Logo or not, I still say that a quick search and a phone call, and Bob would have had 'The Talk' with Chris. Would that deter him from ordering sex toys in the future? Probably not.

Yeah I assume Bob mostly gave up at that point.

 

[Augcletian]

Yeah I assume Bob mostly gave up at that point.

I would too but I would had left that family

 

[Ass_manager]

Semper Fi, I've been following Chris close to a decade, can't imagine the situation in the next decade..

 

[King Kiwi]

I'm surprised nobody ever brought up the missed opportunity of Chris not filming sex tapes with Barb.

Well I've thought about it but then I thought otherwise about actually posting about it on this forum so as not to scar my fellow Kiwis further.

 

[Branman65]

You're getting old Chris, but you still have time!

I'm sure there are a lot of homeless women who'd be impressed by a tough lesbian who's done prison time and has an apartment, so when he gets out and is given government housing nothing will stop him from finding a true and honest sweetheart who's around his age that can finally give him the daughter he's always wanted (I'd personally recommend Cynthia/WogglebugLoveProductions. They seem to have a lot of shared interests).

Their older age combined with his naturally intense levels of autism will ensure that child becomes a watershed for colors of the autism spectrum that medical science never dreamed could exist.

i don't think chris is fertile anymore