Baldur's Gate III Announced - ...and it's coming to Google Stadia and PC

[Shidoen]

So, I just "downloaded" this game and it's good.
The only downside is that it's fucking boring without playing with friends.
All of my irl friends are too poor to buy. I would love to play with fellow farmers, but that would require me to take extra precautious to prevent bad opsec.

I will tard rage every enemy I see. Also I found this vid from 2 months ago and it's pretty funny.

 

[God of Nothing]

You know I just realized Astarion and Ember from wrath of the righteous are about the same age, I wonder what an interaction between them would look like.

For reference there is an archdemon in Pathfinder (essentially a god) of succubusses. Ember kinkshamed her into being the god of redemption instead, because she's such a nice person.
That's right. A literal elf child made the god of thottery repent.

Also yes, Astarion is also a literal child in elf years, so that explains why he's such a bitch.

Awful simplification of what has to be the best insulting lecture in that game. Girl told the biggest demon lord of the time out of everyone in the abyss she was the most pathetic and miserable bitch in the entire place. Of course she didn't say it like that, but that was essentially her speech.

Doing an evil playthrough sucks so much that I just restarted. You get locked out of so much content and so many companions that it's not worth it unless you're playing co-op with friends. My friend and I decided to do a Dark Urge playthrough when we both have time.

It just sucks because I expected Larian to cut corners since it's so labor intensive to add new content (apparently Nere and Kagha might've been potential companions?). The original BG games were so much fun because you had such a wide variety of characters At least combat is still fun, though 5E still sucks. The environments are really well done and the game gives me some nice Dragon Age Origin vibes. I just don't think I'll replay it solo until they at least attempt to restore some cut content.

Evil playthroughs always suck in one way or another in most games. We all have that idea in our heads of what evil done right looks like: under-handed deals with the right guy, backstabbing a faction leader you can't stand, organizing a racket to collect from the people you "save," throwing a useless party member to the wolves to get something out of their sacrifice, and just doing something absolutely heinous because it might lead to the right thing happening. Subtlety is not a vidya writer's strong suit though. While I laughed when I saw it in Wrath of the Righteous, "I don't like you! Die!" is almost always the evil choice in games. I'm just glad it at least made some attempts and actually succeeded in a few cases (Kestoglyr, Regill, and that one guy working in the arena).

 

[Zirnwyb]

I genuinely hate Gale. Been wooing Karlach, got her engine cooled, and we fucked. Was very embarrassing and lovely. Gale then says to me some bullshit about how he thought I'd show him some respect by telling him first and then mentions Wyll for some reason despite the fucking dialogue option saying Karlach. This leaves me here completely confused because 1) I don't recall talking to Gale much at all beyond the whole giving him items to eat, and 2) Him mentioning Wyll who I haven't been pursing AT ALL. He got all pouty with me when I told him to fuck off which made me wish there was an option to punch him. Like, Gale, I'm a giant lesbian Tiefling who is in love with the other giant Tiefling. How the fuck do you think I want to take you to pound town!?

 

[Mango Cobra]

They recently had to fix this to make it so that Gale wasn't the kind of guy who thinks being nice = flirting

So if you still got that, then, well, I'm afraid your character is giving off some serious fag energy to Gale.

 

[SIMIΔN]

I genuinely hate Gale. Been wooing Karlach, got her engine cooled, and we fucked. Was very embarrassing and lovely. Gale then says to me some bullshit about how he thought I'd show him some respect by telling him first and then mentions Wyll for some reason despite the fucking dialogue option saying Karlach. This leaves me here completely confused because 1) I don't recall talking to Gale much at all beyond the whole giving him items to eat, and 2) Him mentioning Wyll who I haven't been pursing AT ALL. He got all pouty with me when I told him to fuck off which made me wish there was an option to punch him. Like, Gale, I'm a giant lesbian Tiefling who is in love with the other giant Tiefling. How the fuck do you think I want to take you to pound town!?

I guess he'll be suicide bombing the Netherbrain solo this run then.

Am I the only one on the planet who failed to romance him? I had the magic scene at the party and 100 approval but I must have said something wrong.

 

[Zirnwyb]

They recently had to fix this to make it so that Gale wasn't the kind of guy who thinks being nice = flirting

So if you still got that, then, well, I'm afraid your character is giving off some serious fag energy to Gale.

Of course she is, she's a lesbian so it's impossible for her not to. I guess he's one of those "If she has my dick she'll turn straight." dudes now.

I guess he'll be suicide bombing the Netherbrain solo this run then.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=sOeLd9QpP-kAm I the only one on the planet who failed to romance him? I had the magic scene at the party and 100 approval but I must have said something wrong.

How lucky you are. Dude is down bad for my Tav and it confuses and annoys me. I expected Shadowheart with how I am with her but apparently not.

 

[HorridHenry]

You know I just realized Astarion and Ember from wrath of the righteous are about the same age, I wonder what an interaction between them would look like.

For reference there is an archdemon in Pathfinder (essentially a god) of succubusses. Ember kinkshamed her into being the god of redemption instead, because she's such a nice person.
That's right. A literal elf child made the god of thottery repent.

Also yes, Astarion is also a literal child in elf years, so that explains why he's such a bitch.

Astarion is like a 50 year old gay man past his prime and mincing after fresh meat on broadway.

His story does not fit his design or presentation. There is just something vaguely "off" about it. Like is he supposed to be the twink houseboy to this vampire lord? I don't buy it.

I like how camellia made fun of ember and it went over her head but my videogame wife got some sick burns in anyway.

 

[Rick's Beef Wellington]

I stalled out pretty close to the end of Act 3, I'm not into the side quests and the combat got old, I've been playing it a lot though so probably just need some time off from it. But it's a good game! If they made the system like the older games where you could make your own content, people could do old pen and paper module conversions and make some stories that aren't trying to do so much.

After decades of playing CRPGs, the most satisfying battle was the tavern quest where you're asked to clear the cellar of rats. I've played so many games where that's the first quest, and here you are at a high enough level that you can just stroll down the stairs and Ice Storm the little fuckers.

 

[SIMIΔN]

After decades of playing CRPGs, the most satisfying battle was the tavern quest where you're asked to clear the cellar of rats. I've played so many games where that's the first quest, and here you are at a high enough level that you can just stroll down the stairs and Ice Storm the little fuckers.

I recommend you get your party drunk for that fight.

 

[DavidS877]

After decades of playing CRPGs, the most satisfying battle was the tavern quest where you're asked to clear the cellar of rats. I've played so many games where that's the first quest, and here you are at a high enough level that you can just stroll down the stairs and Ice Storm the little fuckers.

I like Shadowheart's spirit guardians for those fights.

 

[Waifuwars]

Astarion is like a 50 year old gay man past his prime and mincing after fresh meat on broadway.

His story does not fit his design or presentation. There is just something vaguely "off" about it. Like is he supposed to be the twink houseboy to this vampire lord? I don't buy it.

I like how camellia made fun of ember and it went over her head but my videogame wife got some sick burns in anyway.

I think they wanted to make him into one of those mysterious brooding twink vampire boys a la every yaoi girl's wet dream. The male (non-NPC) characters are oddly all off-looking. Like with a couple tweaks they could be attractive, and it's not like they didn't already model conventionally attractive face models. Gortash looks like some middle aged guy cosplaying a Final Fantasy character, which is hilarious because the narrative describes him as "attractive".

Another thing BG3 and Wrath shares in common is their black characters being boring as fuck. Wyll is pathetic and I don't even remember the name of the cleric from Wrath. Selah you could at least bully for being a dumbass.

 

[Mr.Miyagi]

Another thing BG3 and Wrath shares in common is their black characters being boring as fuck. Wyll is pathetic and I don't even remember the name of the cleric from Wrath. Selah you could at least bully for being a dumbass.

I like Wyll, but he does suffer from basically being the most generic "heroic adventurer" type you could make, surrounded by a bunch of weirdos in comparison, which is funny considering he's the Warlock who gets shapeshifted into a devil. I appreciated that he admitted he was tricked about Karlach and went "everything will be revealed tonight" rather than the "I can't tell you about my shadowy past, you're just going to have to wait until you're further in the campaign trust me." like Gale and Shadowheart do.

 

[Male Idiot]

I stalled out pretty close to the end of Act 3, I'm not into the side quests and the combat got old, I've been playing it a lot though so probably just need some time off from it. But it's a good game! If they made the system like the older games where you could make your own content, people could do old pen and paper module conversions and make some stories that aren't trying to do so much.

After decades of playing CRPGs, the most satisfying battle was the tavern quest where you're asked to clear the cellar of rats. I've played so many games where that's the first quest, and here you are at a high enough level that you can just stroll down the stairs and Ice Storm the little fuckers.

Squeek Squeek skavenophobia is bad-wrong! I squirted the musk of fear!

 

[Autistic Monkey]

Wyll was more interesting in early access because he was more of a nigger then. That version of wyll felt he was just pretending to be a hero, but nobody picked him in early access and they decided to make wyll much worse to appeal to more people.

 

[Dr. Ricearoni]

I guess he'll be suicide bombing the Netherbrain solo this run then.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=sOeLd9QpP-kAm I the only one on the planet who failed to romance him? I had the magic scene at the party and 100 approval but I must have said something wrong.

I actively avoided interacting with him in any meaningful way but after the wizard guy showed up to stabilize his bomb orb thing he immediately decided he loved me. He had a confession scene and everything and now I don't talk to him anymore.

 

[Kharash]

It just goes to show how awful playersexual romances are. Guys like Gale seem like they could be cool friends but instead they all want to fuck you and it becomes incredibly awkward. You don't just casually go back to being friends after that, the degenerate cat's out of the bag. People called it out when DA2 did it but I guess they've forgotten since then.

 

[Kaizer Ghidorah]

Wyll was more interesting in early access because he was more of a nigger then. That version of wyll felt he was just pretending to be a hero, but nobody picked him in early access and they decided to make wyll much worse to appeal to more people.

he was just another excessive edge lord in a sea of them in the early access version of all companions It's like every character was just what every 12-year-old's first character was

 

[Gravityqueen4life]

It just goes to show how awful playersexual romances are. Guys like Gale seem like they could be cool friends but instead they all want to fuck you and it becomes incredibly awkward. You don't just casually go back to being friends after that, the degenerate cat's out of the bag. People called it out when DA2 did it but I guess they've forgotten since then.

its like the devs thought your average player would just sleep around like some horny teenager or a whore.

 

[There Is Light At The End]

It just goes to show how awful playersexual romances are. Guys like Gale seem like they could be cool friends but instead they all want to fuck you and it becomes incredibly awkward. You don't just casually go back to being friends after that, the degenerate cat's out of the bag. People called it out when DA2 did it but I guess they've forgotten since then.

I started 2 parallel playthroughs. One with a friend as unga-bunga barbarian, another as sorcerer. While sorcerer is unremarkable, unless you count that he is thirsty for some underdark undergarments, unga-bunga has the following:

• Pried open Shadowheart's pod with raw strength not looking for tablet to open it
• Made goblin on outpost before desecrated temple eat shit. No euphemism, no synonyms. He ate shit and said thank you
• Yelled at bitchy ginger druid to release the girl so effectively, that she shuddered
• Received a modicum of respect from kithrak on first meeting
• Aunty Ethel was decimated with speed potion, rage and a lot of crits

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Wrath of the Righteous, "I don't like you! Die!"

It does make me chuckle that in WOTR; literally every conversation has a thing at the end which is just "Die faggot!" for everyone you meet. Random orphans in the street, your own allies, people that are actively trying to explain to you what you need to do to win.

It only really makes sense if you play a CE Orc Barbarian. Which is 100% going to be my next character playthrough. Gazkull the 'Eadtaker will surely be a good choice for running the crusade.