Dobson posted:
Never give the finger...
Aug 10th 2007
Mood: Ashamed
You ever have one of those days which just gets worse and worse no matter what you do? I've just had a doosie of a shitty-ass-day today.
First off, I've been really on edge with my job trying to get the 3 days off that I need to go to this comic convention in Chicago. They denied me the days off originally because someone else already had those days booked for their vacation. But after a lot of running around between different departments of the company, they finally bent the rules just enough to let me go. Things were starting to look up... till today.
The first thing I noticed when I came in was that everyone was whispering behind my back and pointing at me and making jokes about toilets and me for some reason. It wasn't until I was pulled aside by a supervisor did I find out what was going on. Every day we have to sign a sheet to say which Radio we've got checked out and when we've brought them back. I had used a radio the previous day, and someone had signed my name saying that I had dropped it in a toilet full of poop. Naturally it didn't take long to convince the supervisors that this was fake and that I did not do this, but that didn't stop the taunting and the teasing.
I went down to talk to the lead supervisor, got him out of a very important meeting and told him what was going on. He replied by saying "What do you want ME to do about it?" to which i was just flabbergast. I've had hazing problems in the past and all the sups told me to talk to them should something else come up and here I was, talking to a sup, and he was looking at me like I had 3 heads wondering what I expected him to do. Oh I don't know, put a STOP to this sort of nonsense that seems to be following me around everywhere?
What was worse was halfway through the day I got put on servicing the lavatories, which seemed to solidify the rumor going around about me. I pleaded with the supervisor not to put me on lavs and she told me to "buck up and grow a spine. People make fun of ME behind my back and I don't care, so you shouldn't either." which isn't much help.
I tolerated it. I knew that I just had to get through the day and I'd be home free. I'm going to Chicago on Friday through Sunday and then wouldn't be back to work till Tuesday, giving me a nice 4 day weekend while I went out and had some fun. But I didn't do a good enough job apparently.
While my partner and I were taking a break from servicing the lavs, suddenly we got a radio call saying we had missed two airplanes and that we had to go back and re-service them. This was all that I needed, because I knew I had serviced them already. They called and called and called and my partner never replied, so I did. This seemed to hone them specifically on ME and completely ignore my partner. Now it was entirely MY fault. They asked me to check the lav truck and see if it had any water in it. I went the wrong way, furious that we were going to redo the lavs when they were already done and upset that this was going to cause a stupid delay cuz some captain or flight attendant somewhere was being a prick.
I retraced my steps and when I walked through the ramp room, after being called repeatedly on the radio telling me the same thing over and over again, the ramp supervisor stood up and called to me telling me i needed to service those two planes. I snapped back at her, saying that I already knew, I was going to go do it, and that she didn't have to tell me. She snapped back at me even louder and more nastier than I've heard her "Don't you take that tone with me!" and then she proceeded to tell me that she was GOING to send someone to do one plane, while I got the other. Had she said that originally I wouldn't have snapped at her, but the way she started it made it sound like she was just repeating the same thing I had heard in a long time.
Already grumpy and frustrated that everything seemed to just be going completely wrong, I went to service the damn lav. When we pulled the truck up to the plane there were about 4-5 other ramp agents standing around and they started to mockingly clap and applaud our "stupidity" for not doing the lavs and giving them a delay. Furious beyond control I flicked them off with my middle finger, uttered "fuck you" under my breath, and then proceeded under protest to servicing the lavs again. As I had already told them, and as I already knew, the laves HAD been serviced and nothing but clean water came out of them this time. But I was determined to do it "right" this time and screw the inevitable delay.
As soon as I had finished, the same supervisor who snapped at me in the ramp room pulled me aside, asked for my badge, and told me that I was suspended. 5 people had witnessed that I had flicked them off, my attitude was horrendous, and I was apparently just a whiner.
I was dumbstruck. Everyone flicks everyone else off all the time. The sups were constantly telling me to grow up and get a spine and defend myself. I had heard it no less than twice this same day. Yet when I finally DO stand up and defend myself, even when I'm continuing to do my job with everything else that's going on... I'M the trouble-maker and I'M the one who gets suspended.
She took my badge, clocked me out, and she escorted me out of the secure area. Along the way I tried to calmly explain what had happened, but it didn't seem to phase her. As far as she was concerned, no one else at the company complained this much about harassment and therefor I was weak and childish. I tried to tell her that maybe I'm not LIKE she is, maybe I'm not the kind of person who can just let things slide, but again, that didn't seem to soften her revolution. She told me that the company would call me back when they felt like it, and I was left outside the ticketing area, without a badge, without a job, and feeling downright miserable.
If I hadn't flicked them off, I would've still be at the job. I might've been talked to for being terse and grumpy, but I would have at least had a job. Why do I seem to let those people affect me so much? Why is it that I can't overlook the taunting and the jeering that everyone seems to do to me? Why CAN'T I grow a backbone like my supervisor said? I just don't understand it. I've NEVER had this many problems with any of my other jobs. Sure there were obnoxious co-workers, and even my OTHER job at the airport was rough, but it's NEVER been THIS bad before.
The day just went from bad to worse. I've been the victim the whole time. I never threatened anyone. I'm always on time. I do my job no matter how much I hate it. I put up with insufferable coworkers for 4 months. I struggled to get those days off for this trip to Chicago and what good did it do? Nothing. It's all a complete waste of time. Everything. I don't think my idea of transferring within the company is going to be much use now. So there's not much I can do but to look for a new job. My parents are going to go ballistic, since this was the ONLY job I've had so far that had health insurance. I have to find a new job quickly or else I won't be able to pay for my electric and internet bills which are LONG overdue now. Whatever happens, I have to act quickly, cuz I'm not going to BE here for 3 whole days.
Today sucks and I hate Milwaukee.
Edit:
The end of the day has been greatly better than the beginning of the day. My girlfriend is very understanding and she helped me through this difficult time. Then we went out, got some food at a buffet, then went to Jo-Ann's Fabrics, picked up some kits, and now we're making soap! Woo! I also knit a pot-holder cuz we're always misplacing the ones my mom gave me. I'm gonna send her some soap too... lavender scented. Tomorrow we're gonna have a good time in Chicago, and when I get back from this little "vacation" I'm gonna start searching for some other jobs. Possibly working as an usher at a museum or a video store. Just something not quite so high-strung as the Airport job. I think it really was only a matter of time before something like this happened at my job. No one there ever really seemed to like me, and I just can't take that kind of atmosphere. Plus, I'm an artist... I don't like lifting heavy 70 lb bags in a cramped bin.
