Orbiter Chris's Last Will and Testament

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Optimus Prime dijo:
I feel such empathy is not warranted for Chris. Yes, they had a sucktastic beginning, but so have a lot of people and despite the obvious mental handicaps of Autism, such things can and have been overcome by people.

With Chris, the Autism card and the bad upbringing card do not excuse him from doing things that he is obviously cognisant are against his long-term self interests but the short term is more desirable, consequences be damned. Case in point: the macing incident. The video recording clearly shows that he went into that Gamestop fully intending to use that mace and that he was aware he was still banned from that exact store. Indeed, he does a quick glance around right before macing the employee and then shuffling off, because he knew what he was about to do was going to get him in trouble without a valid reason and he did it anyway, later claiming he did have a valid reason (Narrator: he obviously never did).

The idea Chris is limited only goes so far, because numerous times people have tried to help him, but he will always retreat into his fantasies and short-term indulgences instead of making do with what he has and going for long-term permanent improvement of his life. It isn't that he isn't capable of changing, its that he simply refuses to change. In Alcoholics Anonymous, the first step is admitting that one has a problem.

Chris never in his entire life has ever admitted he has a problem or otherwise is not always in the right.

Even in the 'golden age' he was self entitled - the whole Bluespike thing for instance, where Chris had the choice between Julie (who was of course Bluespike all along) or the PSN accounts, Chris chose the former...but not because of any sense of morality, but because Chris had seen it was the moral choice in various media and he expected to get the girl and the PSN accounts because it was the 'right choice'. Entirely self-serving. And to this day, under the weird-ass video game goddess merge prophet schtick, Chris really hasn't changed at the core.
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Chris was also given a choice to burn the medallion or shove it in his asshole.
 
Kolp1607 dijo:
I don't think MKR wants to go 200k into debt.
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Debt cannot be inherited in the United States. Also, there's no way Chris has over $200K in debt. Even if Barb has had him added to the mortgage, assuming they haven't received any additional penalties in the past two years, it can't be much more than $101K right now.

Regardless, if Chris dies before Barb, and some retard from the internet tries to come and get part of her Hoard his toys, she's going to call the cops. Then the cops and the judge will laugh at the internet retards, just like we will.
 
Picklechu dijo:
Borb both lived/are living for awhile, despite shit diets and lack of exercise; Bob even had a bad heart. That being said, Chris does have a shit diet, gets no exercise, has a family history of heart problems, is autistic, and takes tranny meds, so I'd personally be surprised if he makes it past 60. I'll be even more surprised if he doesn't have a health scare of some sort within the next decade.
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I think the reason people feel bad for Chris Chan is like watching a car slowly crashing that could've been prevented. The sympathy angle comes from how Chris' upbringing was so god awful that it makes you wish he was dealt a better hand when he was young instead of being raised by Borb.
 
"The air conditioner died, I take that as a sign" of his impending death, I guess?

For such an omnipotent goddess, Christine lives in a world of superstition, omens, portents, prophecies, and events that are "fated and foreseen"

Christian is less a master of his own destiny than ever, even when taken from his own (singularly unique) metaphysical viewpoint.
 
Everyone needs to just stop. Chris would never speak so cryptically about killing himself. This is simply him further engaging in his imagination-land and is his contingency in case he disappears to C-197 during da merge instead of the cartoon characters coming to him. He's not going to drink bleach or anything of the sort as an experiment to get to cartoonland. Chris' "magic" is closer to shamanism than psychotic drug abuse. He'll put a picture of Sonichu in the four corners of his house and hang his medallion facing a specific direction "as prophesized", not eat random mushrooms found growing in his backyard.
 
Optimus Prime dijo:
I feel such empathy is not warranted for Chris. Yes, they had a sucktastic beginning, but so have a lot of people and despite the obvious mental handicaps of Autism, such things can and have been overcome by people.

With Chris, the Autism card and the bad upbringing card do not excuse him from doing things that he is obviously cognisant are against his long-term self interests but the short term is more desirable, consequences be damned. Case in point: the macing incident. The video recording clearly shows that he went into that Gamestop fully intending to use that mace and that he was aware he was still banned from that exact store. Indeed, he does a quick glance around right before macing the employee and then shuffling off, because he knew what he was about to do was going to get him in trouble without a valid reason and he did it anyway, later claiming he did have a valid reason (Narrator: he obviously never did).

The idea Chris is limited only goes so far, because numerous times people have tried to help him, but he will always retreat into his fantasies and short-term indulgences instead of making do with what he has and going for long-term permanent improvement of his life. It isn't that he isn't capable of changing, its that he simply refuses to change. In Alcoholics Anonymous, the first step is admitting that one has a problem.

Chris never in his entire life has ever admitted he has a problem or otherwise is not always in the right.

Even in the 'golden age' he was self entitled - the whole Bluespike thing for instance, where Chris had the choice between Julie (who was of course Bluespike all along) or the PSN accounts, Chris chose the former...but not because of any sense of morality, but because Chris had seen it was the moral choice in various media and he expected to get the girl and the PSN accounts because it was the 'right choice'. Entirely self-serving. And to this day, under the weird-ass video game goddess merge prophet schtick, Chris really hasn't changed at the core.
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I've said it before and though I know a lot of folk disagree, I still stand by it. In everyone's life you have that one moment when you get your ass whopped and you realise you're not this invincible center of attention. I've had it, and I'm sure everyone else has too. It's part of growing up in a world where wolves, famine, and winter no longer serve as the Western world's enforcement of humility. Might be a school bully, your big brother/sister, your parent(s), or that bloke with the rusty van that was NOT filled with candy like promised.

Aside from a brief skirmish on a bus, Chris never had that moment when you're afraid. He just needed one day in his life, like the pepper spray incident, or the attraction sign incident, where someone put him in his place by inflicting pain. Then when he writes it his way in his comic, they come back, and punish him for that too.

It's not a nice thing to say or wish on anybody, but when you take away the special schooling Borb could have provided, it feels like that was a last bastion of hope to check his hubris.
 
Needs to be sectioned immediately!
If all this doesn't scream a danger to yourself or others he's actually freaking Sonichu and the Merge is due Tuesday...
No joke, someone (preferably in the US) has to bite the bullet and break the prime directive and call whatever department in Virginia that could have him committed, or he will literally bite the bullet, got my money on a one mans Heaven's Gate...


Warm Line – Mental Health America of Virginia

mhav.org mhav.org


www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org

Virginia

Virginia has laws and standards that govern when court-ordered intervention for severe mental illness is appropriate.
www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org

Anonymously or whatever but at the very least the fucker needs some sort of psychological evaluation/treatment.
 
Última edición:
Tiger Tanaka dijo:
I've said it before and though I know a lot of folk disagree, I still stand by it. In everyone's life you have that one moment when you get your ass whopped and you realise you're not this invincible center of attention. I've had it, and I'm sure everyone else has too. It's part of growing up in a world where wolves, famine, and winter no longer serve as the Western world's enforcement of humility. Might be a school bully, your big brother/sister, your parent(s), or that bloke with the rusty van that was NOT filled with candy like promised.

Aside from a brief skirmish on a bus, Chris never had that moment when you're afraid. He just needed one day in his life, like the pepper spray incident, or the attraction sign incident, where someone put him in his place by inflicting pain. Then when he writes it his way in his comic, they come back, and punish him for that too.

It's not a nice thing to say or wish on anybody, but when you take away the special schooling Borb could have provided, it feels like that was a last bastion of hope to check his hubris.
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Thing is, Chris simply refuses to budge on the idea he is infallible. He hates reality and the restrictions it imposes so much that every time he's been required to man up, he will fail to do so. Just look at his high school graduation - he was driven to tears because he didn't get any of the academic awards he believed he deserved even though we have his report cards documented and he certainly did not merit any awards.

Or the fact he got banned from Game Place. He absolutely refused to accept this and it wasn't helped by his parents effectively going after Snyder for not treating their son like the specialist snowflake there ever was. And then after literally hitting Snyder with a car, Chris didn't seem even the least bit perturbed by the fact the stupidity of him and his mother could have killed a man - he cared more about how the judge didn't simply award Chris ownership of the store outright. And this all happened again with End Games, though thankfully without somebody getting run over this time since Chris has legit lost more grip on reality and thought sending in a glitter bomb with weird anime eyes drawn in it was going to actually do anything.

But even more than hitting somebody with a car (I know the law decided it was Barb behind the wheel but Chris was still in the car), Chris himself was legit thrown into a jail cell for a few hours and this event seriously spooked him - to date he's never talked about what happened while in holding until his elderly mother had to bail his ass out. This was the first real time Chris suffered consequences of his actions on that scale and it freaked him out. But this didn't really drive it home that maybe he should stop acting the way he does, all it did was make him understand that he can't get away with overtly attacking people.

The only way Chris ever changes is if he believes it is in his better interest...and even then he'll only do it as long as he has to to get what he wants, after which he will go right back to whatever he did before. He is the ultimate creature of habit.
 
The Great and Powerful Us dijo:
Needs to be sectioned immediately!
If all this doesn't scream a danger to yourself or others he's actually freaking Sonichu and the Merge is due Tuesday...
No joke, someone (preferably in the US) has to bite the bullet and break the prime directive and call whatever department in Virginia that could have him committed, or he will literally bite the bullet, got my money on a one mans Heaven's Gate...


Warm Line – Mental Health America of Virginia

mhav.org mhav.org


www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org

Virginia

Virginia has laws and standards that govern when court-ordered intervention for severe mental illness is appropriate.
www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org www.treatmentadvocacycenter.org

Anonymously or whatever but at the very least the fucker needs some sort of psychological evaluation/treatment.
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WAHAHAHAHAAH!

Look, son.

The local authorities were deluged with calls when Chris was dumb enough to film the hordeheap that is the inside of his house, and despite the clear and present danger and the photographic evidence, nada happened.

Chris has been arrested, sent to psychiatrists and therapists and Im pretty sure weens have been calling and trying to get him committed for a few years now.

And guess what. NADA. You know why?

Here’s why: CHRIS IS A LEGAL ADULT, WITH A CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO ACT LIKE A TARD AND SAY WEIRD THINGS!


Optimus Prime dijo:
Chris himself was legit thrown into a jail cell for a few hours and this event seriously spooked him - to date he's never talked about what happened while in holding until his elderly mother had to bail his ass out. This was the first real time Chris suffered consequences of his actions on that scale and it freaked him out. But this didn't really drive it home that maybe he should stop acting the way he does, all it did was make him understand that he can't get away with overtly attacking people.

The only way Chris ever changes is if he believes it is in his better interest...and even then he'll only do it as long as he has to to get what he wants, after which he will go right back to whatever he did before. He is the ultimate creature of habit.
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A solid asskicking might have done him wonders when he was young. At this point it’s too late for even that to help.

Chris has to do this day never really taken responsibility for anything.

Just look at the interviews he has done.

Everything he is notorious for is either “Trolls took things out of context and twisted them” or “I was blackmailed!”

On a rare occasion he admits he was wrong (because Chris is wily and uses apologies as get out of jail free cards) he quickly either deflects blame “Oh yea-the twolls!” Or expects everyone to give him a pass because “I have changed and it’s ancient history!”

Deflecting blame and his own infallibility is so solidly ingrained in his personality, that the one thing that might change him (Or send him totally over the edge) would be a hardcore psychedelic trip. Not LSD but the really heavy duty shit like DMT or Ibogaine.
 
Última edición:
Optimus Prime dijo:
Thing is, Chris simply refuses to budge on the idea he is infallible. He hates reality and the restrictions it imposes so much that every time he's been required to man up, he will fail to do so. Just look at his high school graduation - he was driven to tears because he didn't get any of the academic awards he believed he deserved even though we have his report cards documented and he certainly did not merit any awards.

Or the fact he got banned from Game Place. He absolutely refused to accept this and it wasn't helped by his parents effectively going after Snyder for not treating their son like the specialist snowflake there ever was. And then after literally hitting Snyder with a car, Chris didn't seem even the least bit perturbed by the fact the stupidity of him and his mother could have killed a man - he cared more about how the judge didn't simply award Chris ownership of the store outright. And this all happened again with End Games, though thankfully without somebody getting run over this time since Chris has legit lost more grip on reality and thought sending in a glitter bomb with weird anime eyes drawn in it was going to actually do anything.

But even more than hitting somebody with a car (I know the law decided it was Barb behind the wheel but Chris was still in the car), Chris himself was legit thrown into a jail cell for a few hours and this event seriously spooked him - to date he's never talked about what happened while in holding until his elderly mother had to bail his ass out. This was the first real time Chris suffered consequences of his actions on that scale and it freaked him out. But this didn't really drive it home that maybe he should stop acting the way he does, all it did was make him understand that he can't get away with overtly attacking people.

The only way Chris ever changes is if he believes it is in his better interest...and even then he'll only do it as long as he has to to get what he wants, after which he will go right back to whatever he did before. He is the ultimate creature of habit.
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I think it's because the law failed to come through and punish Chris. He went legal eagle with daddy's money until Snyder got bored senseless and agreed to drop the felony side of things. Barb received community service. In one sense they lost their money, but Chris won''t feel this till Barb's death. A week, a month, a year, that might have changed him... or destroyed him enough to put some reality in there.
 
Tiger Tanaka dijo:
I think it's because the law failed to come through and punish Chris. He went legal eagle with daddy's money until Snyder got bored senseless and agreed to drop the felony side of things. Barb received community service. In one sense they lost their money, but Chris won''t feel this till Barb's death. A week, a month, a year, that might have changed him... or destroyed him enough to put some reality in there.
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That was such a weird ruling.

Yeah, I know Chris is a first time felony offender, but the court basically went: “You're a manchild so you won’t get punished like an adult!” Without drawing the consequence and have Chris put under supervision or in some kind of sped-program.

Like, either give him a few weeks in jail like a grown man with previous infractions with the law.... Or draw the consequence of Chris being “childlike” (I believe in his own attorney’s words) and have him put into a program.



anameisaname dijo:
Chris and barb are alive and well.

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Barb and I are safe, well and okay. In the sequence of events, this was timed as a think-ahead moment for this timeline.

WAITASECOND?!? This is Chris writing, but WASNT HE SUPPOSED TO BE IN AN ALTERNATE DIMENSION?! Is he back in his own body already?!

...after reading all of that and this, what are you feeling right now? If you feel a good and calm sensation, you will have a lucky and blessed day today. Otherwise, if you feel weirded out, consider yourselves blessed you’re day is remaining neutral after this moment

What... The... Fuck does that even mean?!
 
Fapcop dijo:
That was such a weird ruling.

Yeah, I know Chris is a first time felony offender, but the court basically went: “You're a manchild so you won’t get punished like an adult!” Without drawing the consequence and have Chris put under supervision or in some kind of sped-program.

Like, either give him a few weeks in jail like a grown man with previous infractions with the law.... Or draw the consequence of Chris being “childlike” (I believe in his own attorney’s words) and have him put into a program.





Barb and I are safe, well and okay. In the sequence of events, this was timed as a think-ahead moment for this timeline.

WAITASECOND?!? This is Chris writing, but WASNT HE SUPPOSED TO BE IN AN ALTERNATE DIMENSION?! Is he back in his own body already?!

...after reading all of that and this, what are you feeling right now? If you feel a good and calm sensation, you will have a lucky and blessed day today. Otherwise, if you feel weirded out, consider yourselves blessed you’re day is remaining neutral after this moment

What... The... Fuck does that even mean?!
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It's Chris don't try to find internal logic.
Gibi covers the current lore in the most "accurate" way most likely since he's been covering it.

 
Sonichu's finally had enough of his fathermothers crap and wants to get back to his wife (probably because he knows Blake has been slamming that sweet pink ass behind his back) and he will stop at nothing. He fabricated this last will and testament and will kill himself in Chris' body dimensional soul swap.

or

Chris has finally realized that the merge requires a blood sacrifice and since he's an out of shape blob of lard and autism, he can only offer his own flesh since Barb would probably mop the floor with him.
 
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