The Super Best Friends Super Best Griefing Thread - Matt's a cuck, Liam is a bitch, Pat's a loony and Woolie's Way is now trademarked

The dude has ducked games like Half Life, Soul Reaver, and who knows how many other milestones out of sheer Woolie-Wayism, he could've milked the hell out of playing games too clunky for Gen Z, playing them fresh, see what holds up, show why they're these titans. But he managed to fuck even that up royally.
By far the most infuriating thing about Woolie is how he makes up his mind on something instantly and then has to explain why he was actually right about it for 20 minutes when the next line of dialogue proves him wrong. Soul Reaver was just the fucking pinnacle of that.
 
By far the most infuriating thing about Woolie is how he makes up his mind on something instantly and then has to explain why he was actually right about it for 20 minutes when the next line of dialogue proves him wrong. Soul Reaver was just the fucking pinnacle of that.
"Oh. .... ..... Well that wasn't clear at all."
 
Because if you want me to stop playing, thats the fastest way to do it.
Lol, at least he has an out. Honestly, he seems miserable. He really should just move games. If even the parasocials are bored and it's not lightning up the channel like he'd hoped, he's just gunna stay sad and angry at everything. Can't remember the last time he seemed genuinely happy. Kind of like Vinny Vincesauce. Once the burnout sets in, you have to pivot. For Vinny he makes good money, but for Woolie it's just stubbornness lmao
 
Lol, at least he has an out. Honestly, he seems miserable. He really should just move games. If even the parasocials are bored and it's not lightning up the channel like he'd hoped, he's just gunna stay sad and angry at everything. Can't remember the last time he seemed genuinely happy.
Woolie would rather be a miserable failure on his own terms than find success and happiness by adjusting his methods based on anyone's advice or general consensus. Which sounds a lot more admirable than it is when you write it out that way, but all it really means is that he's very much on team cut off your nose to spite your face.
 
Chatter: "I think it still might be good for Woolie if he tried to party with randoms just to see what its like."
Pat: "*reads chatter message* THAT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA."
Woolie: "Oh are you trying to set me up? Because if you want me to stop playing, thats the fastest way to do it. I would rather party up with the NPCs that ever debase myself into random queue (like a peasant!)."
Pat: "Woolie you are totally right. I once had a bad experience in a random queue, therefore, you should absolutely never random queue. Now please hold onto my hand, we're going into Halatali."
How horrible it would be for Woolie to have something unpredictable or fun happen on a livestream.

I have 0 idea why Pat or Woolie thought playing a MMORPG with the MMO part awkwardly sawn off would be a good idea but here we are.

It's shocking to think that Asmongold, LowTierGod, and even DSP are better at rolling with punches and having fun than Woolie. He might be the least fun person alive.
 
Which sounds a lot more admirable than it is when you write it out that way
It'd be one thing if his own terms were something cool like refusing to sell out to advertisers or have strong reasoned opinions against consensus, but with him it's just deliberately playing every game in the most inefficient and non-entertaining way possible as an entertainer. I feel like I say this about every cow with a modicum of success, but anyone even remotely competent could step into Woolie's shoes, put the gameplay and audience interaction in the bag, and make a decent living in the cushiest job possible.
The most frustrating part is it's not even like he has to try harder, he just has to stop trying so hard to do things obviously wrong, ignoring all signs around him to course-correct.
 
he's just chugging along the Woolie Way upset that his one autistic interest isn't shared by the entire world.

I wouldn't even relegate it to being an "autistic interest"; because Woolie isn't particularly skilled or knowledgable - He merely committed to adopting fighting games as his personality and passion where he was lacking genuine ones. Woolie is more like the loser from your home town who's still trying to be a battle rapper after the scene died having excluded him; acting as though he's been personally entrusted to carry the torch for some bygone thing no one else actually considered him a peer or part of, mostly as a consequence of alienating others by demonstrating his ignorance and entitlement to feel like somebody any time he opens his mouth. Living Failure summed it up pretty well on the previous page.

To repeat an earlier consensus: Woolie is sub-DSP in the matter of fighting games.

By far the most infuriating thing about Woolie is how he makes up his mind on something instantly and then has to explain why he was actually right about it for 20 minutes when the next line of dialogue proves him wrong. Soul Reaver was just the fucking pinnacle of that.

This is the sole quality of Woolie's I find entertaining (aside from when Matt and Pat used to shit on him in LPs); and is why I'm guilty of hoping he'll eventually play Soul Reaver 2 after forgetting how shit his views for 1 were. He also discounted all positives of the game for not being the God of War-style button masher he had mistaken it for and dismissed it as being in 1999; condescendingly proclaiming the game to merely have been something fans misremembered as good because they were children. Meanwhile, he spends the entire LP documenting his failure to grasp game mechanics or story beats he insists were intended for children while a baby cries in the next room, and never seems to grasp how big of a loser his own words and actions manage to portray him as being.
 
Última edición:
I wouldn't even relegate it to being an "autistic interest"; because Woolie isn't particularly skilled or knowledgable - He merely committed to adopting fighting games as his personality and passion where he was lacking genuine ones. Woolie is more like the loser from your home town who's still trying to be a battle rapper after the scene died having excluded him; acting as though he's been personally entrusted to carry the torch for some bygone thing no one else actually considered him a peer or part of; because he demonstrates his ignorance and entitlement to feel like somebody any time he opens his mouth.

To repeat an earlier consensus: Woolie is sub-DSP in the matter of fighting games.
Woolie glommed onto fighting games because it was the only scene in Canada that he saw other black people at, simple-as.

Not black enough to enjoy gun n' ball, too black to navigate a map.
 
Chatter: "I think it still might be good for Woolie if he tried to party with randoms just to see what its like."
Pat: "*reads chatter message* THAT IS NOT A GOOD IDEA."
Woolie: "Oh are you trying to set me up? Because if you want me to stop playing, thats the fastest way to do it. I would rather party up with the NPCs than ever debase myself into random queue (like a peasant!)."
Pat: "Woolie you are totally right. I once had a bad experience in a random queue, therefore, you should absolutely never random queue. Now please hold onto my hand, we're going into Halatali.
I can't fathom why they are even bothering with a MMO run if Woolie is so disgusted with the mere thought of interacting with other people and why the fuck is Pat encouraging that mindset. I used to love lone wolfing it when I played MMO's partially because I didn't want to commit to syncing my time with randos, but even I sucked it up and would party if the situation called for it or if I ran into a guy who had happen to have similar goals in the area or just needed help. If Woolie did end up getting a bad experience from a random, at this point it would probably be deliberate trolling from some guy annoyed by him aggressively telling his fans to fuck off.

Just play a single player game, Woolie.
 
He's just going along the Woolie Way utterly resistant to anything else, hoping that one day fighting games will take off again and he'll be the king of the FGC for showing off a hundred half-similar obscure games. Motherfucker, fighting games are DEAD! Tekken and Street Fighter aren't gonna save them, anyone trying to learn now is gonna have to go up against people who have been playing Kazuma and Ryu for decades! 2XKO could have given it a few more years, but the Cannon brothers gave it a shitty name, made it a tag fighter, and then balanced it like ass - and if the fucking League fighting game failed for being a 2v2 tag fighter, Marvel Tokon isn't gonna bring in new blood with a goddamn 4v4! And I'm sorry Pat, but you are literally the last person on Earth who gives a shit about Virtua Fighter.
Fighting games these days are full of mechanics that negate old knowledge so newfags can stand a chance, like all the retarded movement changes in Slime Fighter 6 and Guilty Queer Soyve(there's a video of some random dude beating Daigo in SF6). But yeah, the last time to make it big as a fighting game player was around SF4's lifespan. And even if fgs made a comeback Woolie would still stay where he is, he didn't do anything at the time FGC thrived and he had SBFP clout, he wouldn't be anything now that he's a noname bum and an even bigger scrub, as far as fighting game fags go, dude isn't qualified to tie LTG's shoes.
 
I can't fathom why they are even bothering with a MMO run if Woolie is so disgusted with the mere thought of interacting with other people and why the fuck is Pat encouraging that mindset. I used to love lone wolfing it when I played MMO's partially because I didn't want to commit to syncing my time with randos, but even I sucked it up and would party if the situation called for it or if I ran into a guy who had happen to have similar goals in the area or just needed help. If Woolie did end up getting a bad experience from a random, at this point it would probably be deliberate trolling from some guy annoyed by him aggressively telling his fans to fuck off.

Just play a single player game, Woolie.
Woolie is doing it because FF14 has a reference in a later dungeon he wants to "experience" for some autistic reason, but he is also circling the drain and needs to make some moves to be relevant again. He of course is a pissy baby about having to *gag* actually do something smart someone else has told him to do rather than continue to "Woolie Way" it like he has for nearly a decade.

Pat is clearly doing it to score points with the FF14 circuit team by walking his pet nigger on a leash through FF14. Woolie being a giant off-putting antisocial pissbaby has pretty much negated all that though. Begging the question why Pat is even bothering to try and salvage this mess?
 
By far the most infuriating thing about Woolie is how he makes up his mind on something instantly and then has to explain why he was actually right about it for 20 minutes when the next line of dialogue proves him wrong. Soul Reaver was just the fucking pinnacle of that.
I swear he would watch Empire Strikes Back and pause it when Vader asks about what Obi-wan told Luke about his father, Then go "So Obi-wan lied right? He totally killed Lukes dad and we are going to find out the crazy space hobo that just tricked this kid into believing his weird space religion was bad" unpauses and watches 30 more seconds "What that doesn't make sense Vader is Lukes dad? Dude cmon man that was just made up on the spot"
 
I don't often do this, but in case anyone wants to do a gaming channel in current year (you shouldn't, the algorithm won't push you unless you're a zoomer standing in front of a Skyrim river with a tiny microphone), here's what not to do.

Here we have Woolie, of Matt and Pat fame.
208k subscribers. Incredible. And yet he only gets 3.5k average views on his FF XIV LP.
Why could this be?

Observe the following retardation.

woolie vs himself.png

Shit thumbnail. If I don't already know him, I see this fly past my feed and I don't even know what it is. I filter it completely. My brain doesn't even try to make sense of it. I assume it's yet another of the millions of low-effort LPs in the toxic soup of other ones. LPs are already fucking dead in 2026, no one's looking at the top right to see that tiny and unnecessary FF XIV logo, and no one knows wtf "Jo Guns" is, but Woolie's got to have his inside joke because he's so unique and special. He's Woolie Way'ing it real hard.

For a thumbnail to pop, it needs to stand out. This is literally just a dude with his FUCKING HEAD CUT OUT OF THE SCREEN, some text I can't read, and a dude's back with a dark coat.
Three dudes talking with a boring-ass white background isn't going to make people click unless they already love you.
This is the kind of thumbnail that you see on a LP video with 12 views, and rightfully so.

Overly wordy title.
Beautiful autism here. Taking precedence over the name of the game, which is relegated to the top right, we have a title that's as much a filter as his fat face. Titles and thumbnails need to pop. You have two separate chances to hook someone's attention and catch their eye, in a way they can't say no to. Let's Plays have a problem in that not every episode even has a moment like that, but there are ways around that, and Woolie instead goes for this. Simplicity helps.

As a creator you're competing with the entire world all the time, and time is the commodity you're competing for. If your title has multiple hyphens, line breaks or colons, you're doing it wrong. Keep it simple.

His videos are far too long for just "funny moment let's play" type shit and it's actually in the realm of "video essay length".
His CTR (click-through rate) is probably about 5% at best and his AVR (Average View Duration) is probably at about 5-10% with these metrics.

Not only is he holding on to a ghost of a genre in Let's Play, he's doing it in the most retarded way possible.
He's doing literally everything I'd advise someone not to do.

(edit: while I'm sperging, youtubers need to stop with the rectangular border lines on their thumbnails, like the white ones Woolie uses here. All they do is make it look tacky and gay)
 
to gemini: "Improve this youtube thumbnail and title to be more eye-catching using standard 2026 clickbait strategy"
Result:
Ver archivo adjunto 9246579
"THE F&C RETIREMENT"
Even Gemini thinks Woolie should throw in the towel. Also I thought that was Reggie on the right until I looked closer. All it's missing is Clemps returning from his hiatus to ride Pat like a wild hog in the background. Let's get the gang back together
 
Shit thumbnail. If I don't already know him, I see this fly past my feed and I don't even know what it is. I filter it completely. My brain doesn't even try to make sense of it. I assume it's yet another of the millions of low-effort LPs in the toxic soup of other ones.
It's frankly fucking baffling that this is even an issue for Woolie. One thing TBFP had nailed the fuck down was branding. You scroll through their playlists, and you'll see popping thumbnails of edited or bespoke art featuring their likenesses in some way, the channel name, or both, with fairly few exceptions. And here we are, almost a decade later, and what the fuck even is Woolie's branding? What's his channel about? How does he not manage to have at the very least a half-decent thumbnail for his videos? He had so much opportunity to learn this shit during TBFP days.

But why ask? Obviously because it would be a good idea, a tested and proven idea, something that's generally agreed upon to work, so naturally Woolie will do absolutely fucking anything else.
 
It's even funnier knowing that crankyconstruct's gay little group of faggy artists were willing to do anything for these guys but I wouldn't be surprised if they all burned bridges with them or that group fell apart since they were pretty awful people
 
It's frankly fucking baffling that this is even an issue for Woolie. One thing TBFP had nailed the fuck down was branding. You scroll through their playlists, and you'll see popping thumbnails of edited or bespoke art featuring their likenesses in some way, the channel name, or both, with fairly few exceptions. And here we are, almost a decade later, and what the fuck even is Woolie's branding? What's his channel about? How does he not manage to have at the very least a half-decent thumbnail for his videos? He had so much opportunity to learn this shit during TBFP days.

But why ask? Obviously because it would be a good idea, a tested and proven idea, something that's generally agreed upon to work, so naturally Woolie will do absolutely fucking anything else.
His brand identity is "Lazy, Ignorant, Entitled Nigger", so his thumbnails are perfectly on-brand, I'd say.
 
It's even funnier knowing that crankyconstruct's gay little group of faggy artists were willing to do anything for these guys but I wouldn't be surprised if they all burned bridges with them or that group fell apart since they were pretty awful people
Cranky is one of many cases why I believe the answer to the question "why are there no great modern artists" is "because they all became gay furries."

Looking him up, apparently he rebranded after a kidney transplant and now exclusively does inflation hyper bimbo commissions?
 
Cranky is one of many cases why I believe the answer to the question "why are there no great modern artists" is "because they all became gay furries."

Looking him up, apparently he rebranded after a kidney transplant and now exclusively does inflation hyper bimbo commissions?
Figures he'd do that, the cranky name was being spread as something negative because his group insulted a lot of other artists in their private discord server, I used to be in it being buddy-buddy with the guy but the guy was much worse than what he showed publicly
 
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