💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Falcon Sebben]

I also saw a recipe the other day for something that had components of Party Cheese Salad, but not all there.

Watergate Salad is made from pistachio jello pudding, crushed pineapple, cool whip, and some crushed up walnuts. It was apparently very popular back in the 70's. Aunt Myrna likely had some dementia moment and added the rest.

Jello salads were popular back in the 70's and every hotel and restaurant had "their" signature salad. I mean some go on to be world wide favorites like the Caesar salad, some barely qualify like the Cobb salad and some we only know about because they were mentioned in an episode of Fawlty Towers. But even the green goop that is the Watergate salad sounds better than Aunt Myrna's salad.

From the '50s to the '70s there were all kinds of bizarre things used to market Jell-O before it settled down to the current relatively sane period of just eating it maybe with some fruit or whipped cream (or even Cool Whip). Mormons (and mid-Westerners to some extent) still have the occasional weird concoction from that period.

You mean like the "savory" versions of Jello that came out? Flavors like "celery", "Italian salad" and "seasoned tomato"?

And that's where Jack fucks up, albeit intentionally. He eats colossal portions of everything, I wouldn't be halfway done with one of his orders before feeling bloated and he often goes for more. No amount of dieting is going to work with those intakes. And frankly, that's without considering that he cheats as well, when I did Keto I ended up quitting the diet plan because I was going crazy without eating bread or having any sweets, I was on it for two months and couldn't handle the cravings. Jack doesn't do real Keto and it shows!

All these diets, like Keto, paleo and even Fatkins aren't supposed to be long term solutions. They're short term solutions. And you need to check your macros. You can't just eat loads of meat and fat. You need some kind of balance in there. You need veggies. You need to take supplements because you can't just go and expect to get everything from your diet when you're deliberately not eating everything you need.

And yes. The cravings you get on them are insane. I did a version of Fatkins many years ago when I get getting in shape and while I never thought I'd get sick of things like bacon and eggs for breakfast I soon realized how monotonous it can get. And of course no bread. Very few carbs. I did it for six weeks. Lost a lot of weight but I never want to do it again. Meanwhile Jagoff has been doing it for how many years now and has lost a grand total of ZERO pounds?

 

[rubytintedchix]

I think it's just proof the Scalfani retardation is genetic.

I think Aunt Myrna is related to Tammy. Not Jack.

 

[RainwaterDrop]

All these diets, like Keto, paleo and even Fatkins aren't supposed to be long term solutions. They're short term solutions. And you need to check your macros. You can't just eat loads of meat and fat. You need some kind of balance in there. You need veggies. You need to take supplements because you can't just go and expect to get everything from your diet when you're deliberately not eating everything you need.

And yes. The cravings you get on them are insane. I did a version of Fatkins many years ago when I get getting in shape and while I never thought I'd get sick of things like bacon and eggs for breakfast I soon realized how monotonous it can get. And of course no bread. Very few carbs. I did it for six weeks. Lost a lot of weight but I never want to do it again. Meanwhile Jagoff has been doing it for how many years now and has lost a grand total of ZERO pounds?

Yes, precisely. I did follow a diet plan where my dietician laid out what I could, should, and couldn't eat. My case wasn't bad, so I could choose between having a cheat day and stay in or lay off a while and lose progress, the cravings ended up getting the best of me but the diet itself was good, I lasted two months and not only neutralized the holiday feasts but also lost a lot more on top lol!

I would have a bit of respect for Jack if he simply admitted he's a fatass who can't follow a diet instead of putting on that song and dance. A person with reasonable willpower will have trouble sticking to a long term diet plan, let alone a guy like Jagoff that keeps his local strip mall joints on the black!

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

 

[Falcon Sebben]

I would have a bit of respect for Jack if he simply admitted he's a fatass who can't follow a diet instead of putting on that song and dance. A person with reasonable willpower will have trouble sticking to a long term diet plan, let alone a guy like Jagoff that keeps his local strip mall joints on the black!

Agreed. If he said he just liked meat and fat and was on Keto for that then I'd be like, "okay". He's still a toxic asshole but at least he's honest about it. Although I'd have even more respect for him if he actually buckled down and powered through it. This of course includes doing actual exercises and not skipping a day because he doesn't feel like getting up. It's not like he needs to work or anything. He can find an hour out of the day to go walk, or in his case hobble around. Yes it's going to be tough. Yes it's going to be painful. Yes he's going to look like an ass. But at his age, why the fuck should he care if he looks like a fool? He does so anyway online and all his dickriders would say what a great job he's doing. And the more he does it the easier it gets.

But no. He's in denial and would rather use a scootypuff to get around because he's a lazy asshole.

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But this asshole insults people on his Facebook, like the neighbor cutting his lawn while wearing a mask. Or talking smack about the fatties at the Ark Park.

 

[Timmy Jolsen]

Or talking smack about the fatties at the Ark Park.

Has he looked in the mirror lately?

 

[AnOminous]

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Do you want to get called a fat fucking incompetent faggot with bitch tits and a dicksucking face on your own Facebook?

Because this is how you get that, Jackoff.

 

[Super Hans v2]

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That's the great thing about the Internet, Jack - you're a worthless faggot until you prove otherwise. Amazing that he's been at this shit for almost two decades and he's done literally nothing in any sphere of his existence worth complimenting.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

 

[Spasticus Autisticus]

At 2:49 he licks ketchup off the rim of his measuring cup. Then he pours water into the cup to get the remaining ketchup out, because he can't figure out how to use a spoon apparently. What the fuck is wrong with this guy

 

[That Damned Tiger]

At 2:49 he licks ketchup off the rim of his measuring cup. Then he pours water into the cup to get the remaining ketchup out, because he can't figure out how to use a spoon apparently. What the fuck is wrong with this guy

Multiple strokes and vascular dementia, I think. It might explain why he had trouble remembering what year his mother died.

 

[densedance]

So this is basicaly a Redneck's Sweet & Sour recipe?

 

[Fascist Frederick]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=eulqyNre18Q

At 4:10, when he starts to stir, the dead arm is completely limp and flopping about moreso than usual... I think he really did have another stroke and it took the claw from us. He also didn't hook it onto anything when he tried to stir. What little resistance it once offered is gone now...

RIP Claw, 2018-2022.
Gone but not forgotten.

 

[AnOminous]

Then he pours water into the cup to get the remaining ketchup out, because he can't figure out how to use a spoon apparently. What the fuck is wrong with this guy

He can't hold the cup and the spoon at the same time with just one arm.

 

[Goatchoker]

At 2:49 he licks ketchup off the rim of his measuring cup. Then he pours water into the cup to get the remaining ketchup out, because he can't figure out how to use a spoon apparently. What the fuck is wrong with this guy

Jfc he’s so inept. A mason jar would be good for his stroke arm. I absolutely believe this man has some solid brain damage.
It. Just. Keeps. Getting. Worse.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

At 4:10, when he starts to stir, the dead arm is completely limp and flopping about moreso than usual... I think he really did have another stroke and it took the claw from us. He also didn't hook it onto anything when he tried to stir. What little resistance it once offered is gone now...

RIP Claw, 2018-2022.
Gone but not forgotten.

Nah I just think he's getting lazier and not bothering to try to use it. If anything he's trying to hide it. Notice at the beginning he's got it hooked on the vinegar bottle but once he starts cooking it's hiding to the side. It's almost like he's turning his body to make it less conspicuous.

 

[ZipDisk]

New music? or a one time? It looks like he's trying to do his yearly reboot.

Is he using cleaning vinegar in this recipe? I don't know what the difference is, but I know cleaning vinegar says "NOT FOR EATING"

Jack is dragging out the corpse of his mother! again!

Not to do with Jack, but most secret family recipes are shit they get off boxes and became tribal over. I once managed to make enemies pointing out that a treasured recipe that was not passed down to my Neice was a bisquik box special. You'd have thought I shot the dog.

Jack's mom grew more apathetic over time, a family trait.

Actual effort lamb to bucket o turkey necks.

Can someone disprove jack's story? I'm guessing he got this recipe off tiktok.

Jak love sweet ketchup sauce! num! num! wadur! He's tuckered out by lemon juice. Brown surgur, because not sweet enough.

Jack fucks up the second step of the recipe by using the wrong ingredient.
Substitutions are the mother of all fuckups.

Jack is no longer cooking. This is no longer cooking with jack. Not even an attempt. We're watching "stirring poorly with jack"

This is just lamb in BBQ sauce. Why the fuck would anyone ever make this, even out of nostalgia? It honestly feels like Jack expects us to remember with him.

 

[Wendell Stamps]

Uses lamb chops; still titles the video “lamb riblet sauce.”

Wut. Seems as if he should have just done a simple seared lamb chop recipe? Or I don’t know…sourced the riblets beforehand, knowing goddamn well that he wasn’t going to find them at his local Walmart?!

Also…bbq sauce on lamb…Jack, no!!

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Is he using cleaning vinegar in this recipe? I don't know what the difference is, but I know cleaning vinegar says "NOT FOR EATING"

Nah. He's just using the jumbo sized Member's Mark bottle of it from Sam's Club. You can use that stuff for cleaning as well if you really want to.

Not to do with Jack, but most secret family recipes are shit they get off boxes and became tribal over. I once managed to make enemies pointing out that a treasured recipe that was not passed down to my Neice was a bisquik box special. You'd have thought I shot the dog.

Yeah I've been there. A treasured family recipe that I had loved since childhood came off a can of Campbell's soup. Sure my grandmother changed it up and made it her own but it was still something she could have read in Better Homes and Gardens.

 

[AnOminous]

Yeah I've been there. A treasured family recipe that I had loved since childhood came off a can of Campbell's soup. Sure my grandmother changed it up and made it her own but it was still something she could have read in Better Homes and Gardens.

All recipes are stolen from after the first time a caveman barbecued a rat on a stick.