🍗 Deathfat Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votos: 27 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votos: 147 5.3%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votos: 385 13.8%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votos: 560 20.1%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votos: 424 15.2%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votos: 334 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votos: 206 7.4%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votos: 705 25.3%

  • Total de votantes
    2,788
Abusive ex husband narrative is going strong now that Tess’ anorexia stint had its five minute of fame run up. Love the story about how she was apparently the abused one but in the same breath explains Nick trying to escape her car mid traffic. Can’t make this shit up lmao
LOLOL. Tess tries so hard to push the poor abused spouse narrative, but Nick was the one who ran as fucking far away as he could. Abusive spouses do everything in their power to keep their victims close - they don't skip town unless the cops are looking to toss them in the slammer. She's never shown one iota of proof, like bruises, threatening messages, police reports - nada.
She's just bullshitting because she always has to spin a narrative of how hard done by her life is.

Also, what the fuck is up with that hair? She must be doing it for a Cake John, because those curls and barrettes scream "jailbait in the 1970s"
 
LOLOL. Tess tries so hard to push the poor abused spouse narrative, but Nick was the one who ran as fucking far away as he could. Abusive spouses do everything in their power to keep their victims close - they don't skip town unless the cops are looking to toss them in the slammer. She's never shown one iota of proof, like bruises, threatening messages, police reports - nada.
She's just bullshitting because she always has to spin a narrative of how hard done by her life is.

Also, what the fuck is up with that hair? She must be doing it for a Cake John, because those curls and barrettes scream "jailbait in the 1970s"
Lol, they were a classic BPD / narcissist pairing: guaranteed fireworks nightly, both of them giving as good as they got. If Nicky ever cared to raise his head above water and spill tea, she'd be sunk.
 
Her attitude at any given moment is dependent entirely on attention and how much she feels validated about her numerous terrible life decisions. She will never admit that she’s fucked everything up
Abusive ex husband narrative is going strong now that Tess’ anorexia stint had its five minute of fame run up.
Her non-strategy for fame reminds me of desperate restaurants on their way to closing their doors forever. The kind that are just trying to get a buck out of the customer with no long-term strategy or real investment.
The burger place that's suddenly got a bloated menu including tacos and crepes.
Half the staff gets canned and the other half is constantly on the edge of quitting.
Nobody cleans the grease trap for months.
Suddenly and inexplicably, plastic cutlery and an old George Foreman grill appear.
And then, instead of paying the staff, the owner drops thousands on....new interior decoration.

Appearing on TV for "anorexia" is the equivalent of that desperate, failing restaurant. There's the makeup, the cameras, the excitement, a few bucks, and the thrill of attention. But for what? So that thousands of people can associate you with the kind of label that belongs on an old episode of Jerry Springer? "I'm a 500 pound anorexic and I'm fabulous!"
What is the long-term arc there? What investment is being made? I know the answers to these questions, and they aren't "lucrative sponsorships and castings."
 
LOLOL. Tess tries so hard to push the poor abused spouse narrative, but Nick was the one who ran as fucking far away as he could. Abusive spouses do everything in their power to keep their victims close - they don't skip town unless the cops are looking to toss them in the slammer. She's never shown one iota of proof, like bruises, threatening messages, police reports - nada.
She's just bullshitting because she always has to spin a narrative of how hard done by her life is.

Also, what the fuck is up with that hair? She must be doing it for a Cake John, because those curls and barrettes scream "jailbait in the 1970s"

Lol, they were a classic BPD / narcissist pairing: guaranteed fireworks nightly, both of them giving as good as they got. If Nicky ever cared to raise his head above water and spill tea, she'd be sunk.
Which is why Tubbers has never filed for divorce or even child support. It’s a mutually beneficial arrangement they have: Nick gets to be a middle aged gay and chubby chasing Peter Pan on another continent and Tess will never have to disclose her income in child support or divorce proceedings. It’s win-win in their eyes as neither of them care about Bowie. Tess wants to desperately offload him onto her family and Nick wants to creampie fatties who waddle onto our forums to fish on them with us.
 
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The abject shame and humiliation I would feel if my mom showed up dressed like that to pick me up from school. Holy shit. I'd feel so embarrassed and disrespected and then you'd turn around and feel even worse because with a mother like Tess she'd catch you even if you didn't say anything and you'd get shit for it.
"What? Are you embarrassed of your MOM? I'm your MOTHER."
"Other people don't get to tell me how to dress, ok? Not your school, not your FATHER..."
"Do I need to go in and talk to those other kids? Are they bothering you? LET ME TALK TO THEM."
*Passive aggressively showing off a sweater she put on* "Is this better? Do I look good now?"

Which is why Tubbers has never filed for divorce or even child support. It’s a mutually beneficial arrangement they have: Nick gets to be a middle aged gay and chubby chasing Peter Pan on another continent and Tess will never have to disclose her income in child support or divorce proceedings. It’s win-win in their eyes as neither of them care about Bowie. Tess wants to desperately offload him onto her family and Nick wants to creampie fatties who waddle onto our forums to fish on them with us.
I learned the other day that if you have a foster kid (or even your own kid when custody is up in the air), you can't get their hair cut without the parent's/other-parent's permission. Is it possible something is happening behind the scenes here and maybe Bowie's hair is a symptom?
Again, not saying long hair on boys is weird or abnormal, but in this case it might not all just be that Bowie is a little skater kid.
 
She doesn't cut his hair because she's lazy. I think it's been posted that he doesn't like having his hair cut, so instead of disciplining him, she lets him be.
 
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The abject shame and humiliation I would feel if my mom showed up dressed like that to pick me up from school. Holy shit. I'd feel so embarrassed and disrespected and then you'd turn around and feel even worse because with a mother like Tess she'd catch you even if you didn't say anything and you'd get shit for it.
"What? Are you embarrassed of your MOM? I'm your MOTHER."
"Other people don't get to tell me how to dress, ok? Not your school, not your FATHER..."
"Do I need to go in and talk to those other kids? Are they bothering you? LET ME TALK TO THEM."
*Passive aggressively showing off a sweater she put on* "Is this better? Do I look good now?"


I learned the other day that if you have a foster kid (or even your own kid when custody is up in the air), you can't get their hair cut without the parent's/other-parent's permission. Is it possible something is happening behind the scenes here and maybe Bowie's hair is a symptom?
Again, not saying long hair on boys is weird or abnormal, but in this case it might not all just be that Bowie is a little skater kid.
She always dresses trashy when she's doing the school runs. There's a picture of her taking him to school in a barely-there sports bra in a pinky-flesh color.
And didn't Rylee get embarrassed by her fashion choices as well?
 
Every time she whines about being “single mother” I’m reminded of that failed(?) project about “unusual families” where she presented with anachan-in-denial and some random black dude as “co-parents”

Have you divorced again, Tess?
 
Every time she whines about being “single mother” I’m reminded of that failed(?) project about “unusual families” where she presented with anachan-in-denial and some random black dude as “co-parents”

Have you divorced again, Tess?
LOLOL. Thanks for reminding me of yet another of Tess' failed attention grabs.

She tried to pass herself off KA-WEER again, acting like she was in a triad with Ollie and some Hispanic dude who looks like he'd rather put his balls on a hot curling iron than touch a vagina. As if an ana-chan like Ollie would ever let Tess touch her sexually, or Tess could bear to go down on a woman without gagging. :story:
 
LOLOL. Thanks for reminding me of yet another of Tess' failed attention grabs.

She tried to pass herself off KA-WEER again, acting like she was in a triad with Ollie and some Hispanic dude who looks like he'd rather put his balls on a hot curling iron than touch a vagina. As if an ana-chan like Ollie would ever let Tess touch her sexually, or Tess could bear to go down on a woman without gagging. :story:
I believe Tess would eagerly eat basically anything if you smeared peanut butter or frosting on it.
 
Hi Tess! Enjoying us talking about your "co-parents"?



She also reshared this and something about it really wigs me out.
 
The "queen platonic family" Tess claimed as of January seems to be over, since Olly has found a new, thin hipster girl to host off of. Olly don't fuck fats.

Olly is growing her hair back in and wearing makeup, but she is still still definitely a dude! Until a camera catches her laughing instead of mean mugging - then she's clearly a pretty young lady.

Olly claims to have moved into a new LA apartment with her new lady love in late April, but as of May 1, she was also claiming to be back in AUS as a caregiver to someone in her evil family.

Oh! And she got dropped by all of her agencies, lol - including Ford. Tess’s gal is now repping her. Bet that goes well.
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Última edición:
OOOOOOHHH! Eating fruit on a blanket outside! MOVE OVER, KARDASHIANS! TESS IS HERE TO SHOW YOU WHAT A REAL GLAMOUROUS LIFE IS!

Bless her enlarged, fat encased heart. She tries so hard.
 
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