🐱 Why Aren't There More Fat Men in Romance Novels?

https://bookriot.com/fat-men-in-romance-novels/

I love romance novels. I’ve loved them since reading my great-grandmother’s Georgette Heyer novels in middle school and then discovering my mother’s secret supply of Nora Roberts and Julie Garwood paperbacks. I love only one bed, secret babies, road trips, and elopements gone wrong. I will never get tired of fake dating stories (although publishing is doing its best to test this limit). And I eat up friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, second chance romances, and soulmate stories. I love romance novels.

Romance gets shit on a lot. People call romance novels predictable, formulaic, poorly written, anti-feminist, and a genre that creates unrealistic expectations for women (i.e orgasms and/or respect). And these people almost never have even read a romance novel beyond Fifty Shades of Grey or maybe Outlander. In the romance community, we are so used to bad takes and critiques from people that don’t read, write, or love this genre. But I ask the question: where are the fat heroes and love interests in romance novels? This question is not just a question, but also a critique and, perhaps, a call to action. As I ask this, I want you to remember that I love romance novels. I have read hundreds, if not thousands of them. This call is coming from inside the house.

Representation in Romance Is About Who Gets a Happily Ever After​

The reason it’s so important to diversify romance novels, in all ways, is because these stories help culturally define who deserves a happily ever after. These stories also signal who is worthy of being considered sexually attractive and receiving sexual pleasure. Literature, from all genres, has a long history of coding fat characters as automatically unattractive. Fat is often shorthand for characters being stupid, lazy, villainous, non-sexual, or supporting characters.
Romance novels have a long history of fatphobia. Old school historical romances, in particular, are filled with heroines whose waists are so small the heroes can encircle them with just their hands. Contemporary romances feature near-constant diet culture, makeover stories, and praise of small bodies. Listen, I still love a lot of these books. There are some I can acknowledge the problems in and move on and others which cross a line for me. The same is true for other problematic elements in romance novels. But these books sent a clear cultural message about who deserved romance, and it was straight, thin, non-disabled, and mostly white characters. Diversity in romance characters and authors has been growing steadily. But, when it comes to representation of all kinds, the romance genre still has a long way to go.

Fat Heroines in Romance Novels​

I’ve written before about how seeing fat heroines in romance novels was an incredibly meaningful experience for me. Romance novels were a way that I tried out and fantasized about romantic and sexual relationships before I was ready for them in real life. Growing up steeped in diet culture and disordered eating, the experience of reading about fat women fall in love changed the way I thought about my body and my sexuality.
Fat romance heroines are still a relatively new phenomenon. Many consider Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie from 2004 an early example of a fat romance heroine. And that is less than 20 years ago. Furthermore, not all romance novels with fat heroines include positive representation. Still, there are so many more authors writing amazing fat heroines right now than ever before. And there is almost nothing I love more than seeing fat female characters fall in love. But, even as I love these stories, they follow a trend of fat heroines who are paired with thin, physically fit heroes. This matchup has become normalized and celebrated within the romance genre. It represents a huge step forward in terms of fat representation. However, a problematic double standard persists when it comes to the lack of fat male romance heroes.

Where Are the Fat Romance Heroes in Books?​

Before preparing for this article, I don’t think I’d ever read a romance with a fat man as the hero. Xeni by Rebekkah Weatherspoon stands out as one of the few romance novels that seems to get this right. The hero, Mason, is fat, but being fat is not his main personality trait or a huge cause for concern in the story. Weather Girl by Rachel Lynn Solomon is another good example of this. Russell is a fat sports reporter and single father. While some fatphobia is present in the story, it’s background noise to the romance happening on the page. Talia Hibbert’s novella Guarding Temptation, Hefty by Jessa Kane, and The Lady’s Champion by Marie Lipscomb also are examples of fat male characters as romance heroes. In queer romance, the novella Their Troublesome Crush by Xan West and Stripped by K.M. Neuhold also feature fat men as love interests.
The fact that after some serious hunting I could only find seven books featuring fat male heroes is telling. The majority of these books are self-published or published by small, independent presses. Many of the male characters were former athletes or sports-adjacent (which seems to present a different bias that it’s only okay for characters to be fat if they are physically strong or exercise). And only two of the books, The Lady’s Champion and Troublesome Crush, feature stories where both love interests were fat. I don’t say any of this to call out these books or these authors. These books were great, and you should read them. I salute the authors writing these stories and hope there are more of them soon. However, romance publishing has a long way to go when it comes to representing fat men as romance heroes.

We Need More Fat Men in Romance Novels​

Romance novels have long used the physical archetype of tall, thin, or straight sized, muscular men to instantly communicate with readers who the hero is and why he is worthy of love and attraction. Tall, dark, and handsome is a cliché for a reason. Descriptions of washboard abs and six packs abound inside romance novels. Most romance heroes have little physical variation between their physiques. Heroes have different hair colors, eye colors, and increasingly are different races and ethnicities. They might have a beard or not, have chest hair or not, or perhaps even have a scar. But there seems to be an unwritten rule that the vast majority of romance heroes cannot be overweight or short (height being a whole other story for men in romance novels).
There is a message of internalized fatphobia present when we think that fat women can serve as love interests, but not fat men. I understand seeing a fat woman with a physically fit, conventionally attractive man can be a hugely satisfying pairing. This feels especially true when we think about how the opposite is more present in film and television, where fat actors are more likely to be matched with thin actresses than vice versa. Women in Hollywood and throughout society have had the most restrictive beauty and body standards forced upon them. Seeing fat women as beautiful, sexy, and lovable is a radical act that does deserve celebration.

But when fat women are only considered love interests when thin men desire them, that is not true fat acceptance or body positivity. This formula too often treats men as trophies to be won, instead of partners to be cherished. And sometimes it feels like there is a message that fat romance heroines are “not like other fats.” Would these women be seen as less attractive if they were being pursued by fat heroes instead? For a lot of readers still working through their own body image issues (I’ll include myself in this, even as I’m working on it), I’m afraid the answer is yes.

Fat Love Interests in Queer Romance​

Queer romance novels often repeat this dynamic by usually having at least one love interest be thin within same gender pairings. In a recent article in Fat Studies: An Interdisciplinary Journal of Body Weight and Society, Shana McDavis-Conway discussed this trend, stating: “Most queer romance publishers have prioritized books that replicate the body size and racial homogeneity of their larger traditional peers.” Just like in straight romance stories, there are exceptions. But the books that get the most attention and support from publishers continue to feature a minimum of one thin love interest within queer romance novels.

Final Thoughts​

I am a fat woman who has been attracted to fat men several times, and yet I’ve rarely seen this dynamic portrayed in the romance novels I read. Liking thin and fit bodies more than other bodies for both genders is not solely a matter of personal preference. It’s upholding a societal standard that some bodies are better than others. We’re taught to place a moral value on thin, fit, and healthy bodies. But we rarely think about the “health” of thin characters in books (see: heroes drinking, smoking, or making a plethora of other “unhealthy” choices on the page and not having that detract from their sexiness as long as they have a six pack). This is a hugely divisive issue within the romance community. But there is definitely a line here to walk between not shaming ourselves for our fantasies, while challenging our own biases.
I’m not blaming any individual authors on this issue. Especially not the authors who are pushing and fighting to make a space for fat women in romance novels…which we also still need more of. But I also want to read more romances with fat men as heroes. And short men. Disabled men. Men who are thin but not physically fit. I want all of it. And publishers, authors, and especially audiences are going to have to work together to make room for these stories on our bookshelves and in our hearts.

 

[BIG DADDY]

Fat women don’t deserve handsome, rugged men. They have one job to attract a mate and can’t even be assed to perform the biggest controllable factor to be attractive (hygiene aside). This author must be salty reading all these books where fat women get hunks and then looking over at her slobby bf. C O P E

 

[draggs]

Fat women in their 30s-death don't want to fantasize about fucking some balding chubster with a 4 inch needle dick

They want to fantasize about getting fucked by a 25 year old Adonis with a 7 inch beer can donger

 

[God of Nothing]

Fat women don’t deserve handsome, rugged men. They have one job to attract a mate and can’t even be assed to perform the biggest controllable factor to be attractive (hygiene aside). This author must be salty reading all these books where fat women get hunks and then looking over at her slobby bf. C O P E

how dare you manlet
all women are queens!

go die alone at 5'11, you midget
6ft+ forever!

...wait, that's 12% of the human population?

 

[Drkinferno72]

Because they cater to the female Fantasy

 

[FoolhardStar]

Fat men are only attractive to gay males with terrible taste. Forcing things like this into escapist media generally geared towards women is how you stop selling copies of it, and the same happens when a variety of other current year things (transgenders and weird mystery meat guys) are shoved in without consideration of what the audience actually wants. People that want to look progressive will signal boost it because it's double-plus good to do so (even when they don't support it with cash, happens a lot actually), while your target audience will pirate it and laugh about how shit your work is with buddies at best.

 

[thismanlies]

1. Go to erotic literature site
2. Search for “fat men”
3. Fap like fucking crazy

I can do 1 and 2 no problem. I don’t see why the author can’t.

 

[DuckSucker]

I think it's best to get a bit of perspective on what she might consider to be 'fat'.

Her boyfriend;

Ver archivo adjunto 3246619

He's heavyset but I'd guess he is not unfamiliar with something like rugby.

I mean to be fair a lot of people would say he's fat. It comes down to fat versus obese and how the weight is carried, he has like 'dad bod' I would say and Ive seen a lot of women consider that fat, a lot of men too, but at least acceptable past a certain age. He has the kinda-man-tits and probably a beer belly but nothing is sagging so you can say 'oh well it could just be he has a wide chest'. Like the other guy said men go from fat to obese, and the type of women writing or thinking about this go from 'thicc' to 'fat'. Two different things youre talking about.

The thing they do get right is that as a man, it's seen as better to be big than scrawny so some big fat guy is considered a bit more masculine. Fat men are kind of seen as 'sturdy' up to a point; like well at least he's probably big and strong, can throw his weight around, versus some short guy with weak looking arms and narrow shoulders.

 

[NoReturn]

Then write it yourself you lazy bint. Go on, we'll wait here. Write your self-insert romance novels about you and your soyboy husband.

 

[EnemyStand]

Virginia met Ignacio beneath the apple tree where they made that marriage pact so long ago. 20 years and 300 pounds later, they had finally met once again. "Oh my love", huffed Ignacio, sweat streaming down his face after the effort of climbing the hill. "Finally we meet here again, after 20 years!"
"Oh Ignacio, don't look at me. My makeup is running!" Virginia raised a flabby flipper to her face. Her makeup was indeed running, the mark of the hot summer day and 20 foot walk. Sweat dripped off her full, heaving breasts, quite literally spilling out of her bodice.
"You always look perfect to me, my love." Ignacio lied, somehow not fainting from the mixture of flop sweat and lilac perfume. His head was swimming after the most exercise he had in 20 years. As he leaned in to passionately kiss Virginia, their double chins met in unison with their lips. Their bellies rubbed together. Virginia began undressing, though whether it was due to the heat or the throes of passion she couldn't say.
"Oh my love." Ignacio crooned as he disrobed, his fat rolls spilling out of his girdle. Virginia then noticed the sight of grey cellulite on Ignacio's left leg: a perfect match for the cellulite on her right leg! Fighting down the tide of disgust, Virginia let Ignacio attempt to lay her down, but due to her extreme weight he dropped her instead.
".Oh Roberto!" said Virginia, as she had been knocked senseless on the tree root in the fall. Ignacio didn't mind, he was finally going to lose his virginity after his 30 year dry streak Her massive fupa hid her vagina perfectly, and Ignacio struggled to lift it. Finally, he managed to roll it up and tuck it under her massive quintuple Z breasts, the sweat of their efforts at passion acting as a glue (when combined with Virginia's yeast infection, of course). Their bellies pressed together, as Ignacio's massive 3 inch dong barely scraped against Virginia's outer lips. This was the most stimulation Virginia ever had.
"Oh Ignacio!" She yelled.
"Oh my love!" Ignacio screamed, his lack of endurance painfully obvious as he somehow managed to shoot a small portion of his seed inside Virginia. It was sex, or something like it. The two lovers attempted to held each other, but their respective sizes made that impossible. Still, there they laid naked for another six hours, enjoying the scent of their flop sweat and lovemaking. It had been a tiring day.
-Excerpt from "Sex, or Something Like It" Chapter 2.

This is why, you stupid bitch. You guys think I could make it by parodying romance novels?

 

[frozenrunner]

Because women are lying about "body positivity."

 

[SITHRAK!]

Fat women in their 30s-death don't want to fantasize about fucking some balding chubster with a 4 inch needle dick

They want to fantasize about getting fucked by a 25 year old Adonis with a 7 inch beer can donger

To paraphrase Yeezy: I’m not claiming their interests are purely fiscal, but I fail to see them engaging romantically with impecunious individuals.

You can be a pot-bellied, bow-legged balding midget but as long as you have millions in the bank there’ll be an attractive woman to ride your dick like a rowboat in a thunderstorm.

It’s why the first Prestige Purchase most black men in sports and entertainment make with their millions is a white wife or girlfriend.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

There's feeder fics and they are HORRIFIC

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Because no one chooses a fatty unless they have a fetish. Lots of people settle with them though. Being fat is a sign of something being wrong with you in modernity.

 

[Clotso Coof]

Why doesn't this whining bitch write her own fatass romance novels? If she really thinks there's a market for it, she can make money doing something she loves.

Less face it, writing stupid romance novels is easy once you understand the formula. Plunk some bullshit on a page, add excessive adjectives and bad sex. Done.

Because no one chooses a fatty unless they have a fetish. Lots of people settle with them though. Being fat is a sign of something being wrong with you in modernity.

It's also gross feeling up someone who's squishy, sweaty and smelly.

 

[Maggots on a Train v2]

I think it's best to get a bit of perspective on what she might consider to be 'fat'.

Her boyfriend;

Ver archivo adjunto 3246619

He's heavyset but I'd guess he is not unfamiliar with something like rugby.

I didn't know Moviebob had another brother.

 

[Unyielding Stupidity]

Unsurprisingly, women either fantasize about fucking some hunky musclebound Chad, or some old man with an obscene amount of money and a BDSM fetish. Or they fantasize about watching twinks buttfuck one-another if they spend too much time on the internet. None of them want to read a novel about some guy who can only give them three thrusts before stopping to catch their breath.
The only people that fantasize about fucking fat men are homosexual men. And they don't read erotic novels to get their rocks off - they usually go to some dirty gay bar and get pozloaded by five different men who they've known for a grand total of 37 minutes combined.

 

[Airbrushed Van Art]

I’m guessing that this moron has only read modern YA novels or harlequin romances. In the world of literature, we have plenty of protagonists who are ugly, fat, balding, skinny, jaundiced etc. The issue is that movie/tv adaptations miscast them with beautiful actors to make money.

Idiot just doesn’t actually READ real books, only trash.

 

[Sithis]

ethan ralph romance novel when

You realize that, by rule 34 of the internet, because you posited the possibility of that thing, there may inevitably be porn of it?

You fool, you blind fuckin fool, you've doomed us all.

 

[RX-78]

Fat men are only attractive to gay males with terrible taste. Forcing things like this into escapist media generally geared towards women is how you stop selling copies of it, and the same happens when a variety of other current year things (transgenders and weird mystery meat guys) are shoved in without consideration of what the audience actually wants. People that want to look progressive will signal boost it because it's double-plus good to do so (even when they don't support it with cash, happens a lot actually), while your target audience will pirate it and laugh about how shit your work is with buddies at best.

This, women cannot stand obese men at all and if you ever see a decent woman with a tub of gristle its because that fucker has money and she's counting the hours until Ronald McDonald takes his toll. Even in the BBW sphere (that didn't start out as a pun) there is zero tolerance of mantits because they universally fail to live up to masculine standards. Every single stereotype about gunted men is true: they are emotionally unbalanced due to adipose creating so much estrogen, short dick'd to hell and back due to the fat swallowing up their genitals, border line retarded due to the fat clogging their sulci, and unable to hold down a job because businesses see them as the massive liabilities they are.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Because women are far less tolerant of "diversity" in their attraction, while men generally have preferences but will stick it almost wherever they're allowed to, and some places they're not.