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I'm curious, if you think it's bad to sterilize sex, does that mean you are against contraception?
I identify sterile sex as something unhealthy when viewed in broader cultural context, kinda like not exercising is unhealthy, or eating fast food, only with more serious consequences. I'm not blanket against contraception, but I do think contraception leads to unhealthy relationships towards sex and unhealthy relationships with people as a result.
To give one example of how I arrived at that point of view, girls that are on the pill are attracted to different men than when they're not on the pill. They tend to seek closer connection to genetically same rather than similar (including brother/father and other family). Then when they go off the pill, they don't feel that kind of attraction. Suddenly the partner they chose while on the pill, is no longer attractive when off the pill. Particularly the smell is "off" suddenly, apparently. Yet despite no longer being attracted to that person, they may have built a life with that person. They have emotionally bonded with that person. They've arrived at a unhealthy situation as a result of sterile sex.
I'm not sure if I see it the same for sterile sex when people already have children and are like 40+ or something.
I really do think we're somewhat living in a world described in brave new world, where people are encouraged to early and often engage in sex for recreation and I don't think it's making people happy and I don't think it's building a healthy society.
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I agree there is a difference. To be honest, I didn't want to speak for gay men and blame the promiscuity on the difference in sex drive between genders. I felt it might get misconstrued as misandry. There's a stereotype about lesbians hating men, after all.
Don't you get tired of not speaking your mind for fear of it being misconstrued as a kind of prejudice? You know your heart. You know how you mean it. You are allowed to have your own perspective on gay men. Sometimes some groups aren't completely honest with themselves or others and they need others to point out the flaws. No, I could go further; almost always all groups aren't completely honest with themselves and others.
This is honestly my own experience with gay friends; is that if shit were to hit the fan, as it seems it might in about a decade, I wouldn't really count on them on helping me survive and carve out a sanctuary somewhere. They're kinda weakminded when it comes to conflict. Of course most people are these days, but it seems to be more true for the gay men I know. This despite them being on average more physically built, though those are just small samples of course, just curious if you've observed something similar or the reverse.
Isn't it better to be able to talk about these things openly?
I'll bite, why do you think the blame on lack of acceptance is unpersuasive? I do think that it plays a role in causing one to repress their sexuality, which in turn makes them more vulnerable to using devious behaviors as an outlet. This conclusion was inspired by Catholic priests.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm getting the impression that your solution for homosexuality is to repress it altogether, meaning that gay people would either have to be alone forever or force themselves into a heterosexual marriage. Both of these solutions seem impossible to me. I don't want to be alone and heterosexual sex is repulsive to me. Assuming you're straight, imagine the same disgust you would feel at forcing yourself to have sex with another man (or woman, if you're female).
You bring up two seperate issues worth addressing; first the blame of lack of acceptance, and second my "solution for homosexuality". Let's start with the latter.
I'd like to have a solution, but I don't have one. I just know the current situation is as untenable as was the catholic solution that you describe. I do know that getting to a better solution requires viewing the problem with as much clarity as possible. The fact that many of the societal ills, including STD's and promiscuity are verboten topics in regards to discussion about homosexuality makes it impossible to improve these situations.
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The other issue is putting the blame on lack of acceptance. It started for me when looking at suicide stats for transgenders. They're so high it's insane. One is driven to ask: why?
The official answer is that it's because people aren't accepting of transgenders. It seems to me that transgenders in general have unrealistic expectations to how they're received. Right now people are bending so far backwards that when a (notable) transgender threatens violence, or doxes someone, even on live TV, they're defended. I had a youtube account that kept getting banned at one point, even when I recreated it. So without doxing myself, I changed the name from let's say "Joe" to "Trans Joe" and photoshopped a mrs pacman style bow on the head and with the exact same content it was the first out of four channels that didn't get banned and is still up.
What is this telling me? Some people are ridiculously accepting of transgenders.
I had a friend that wanted to get a sex change. But he's been a guy that was always jumping from one cult into the other, one time trying to get me into a turkish cult of bible-copiers or something. He said he had started wearing women's clothes sometimes and that people in his life were cheering for him (again- not unaccepting).
I told him: people will get tired of cheering for it in a months time and a lot of people that transition deeply regret making that choice. Do you know the statistics on the amount of people that end up ending their life after making that choice? He got angry with me. Accused me of having low opinion of him, as if he already didn't know that. I told him that he just accused me of not saying it with the best of intentions towards him, which I did. 6 months later I found out he decided not to do it. He seems pretty happy when I see him. I asked him then if he could identify his prime motivation for wanting to transition sex. He said: "I saw how badly they were treated, and I thought I could be a good shield and example for them as a social, well adjusted-person".
I think the reason nobody else warned him, is because people are afraid of not being accepting of transgenders. They go out of their way to be as accepting to the point that if you want a lot of extra positive attention, you can announce you're trans. I don't know if transgenderism really is an innate thing, but if it is, I suspect that transtrenderism is far more common, like 95% of the cases.
Now what does this have to do with homosexuality acceptance? Everything. It's the same script. Heck, Kevin Spacey was able to take some heat off the fact that he abused a kid by "coming out" as gay. Is that really an example of something that is not very accepted? American conservatives often try to show how good they are by being accepting of gays, like with the whole Milo thing. Is that an example of a culture that's unaccepting of gays? Not to shit on the areas where you might run into prejudice; we all do for all parts of our identity, but when speaking about broader culture I'd say it's hard to speak about it like you're a jew in auschwitz.
So with that degree of high acceptance, it makes no sense that transgenderism has as high a suicide rate as ever. The real reason is probably that an underlying cause creates both transgenderism and suicide (and that the sex change operations have horrific results on one's life, with the demands on dilation and the daily pain and mental results of that pain).
If it's used as a lie to promote transgenderism, why wouldn't it be used as a lie to promote homosexuality?
It's the perfect way to push it forward. You focus everyone on eliminating any resistance to its hegemony. It creates a positive feedback loop: People become gay (or trans), they experience friction and some problems result (let's say they get aids), people want to use this to warn others, they get attacked for not being accepting, this makes people less likely to warn people, more people do it, more people cause problems.
Now I don't think everyone that criticizes homosexuality is good intentioned either, but that's beside the point. People that do want to help are made silent. For example; and this is just spitballing, you could do the same things as you do with smoking. There could be a move to have gay shows have a disclaimer that engaging in non-monogamous homosexual sex is dangerous to your sexual health. I don't think I would support that specifically, but it's completely unthinkable in the current pro-homo culture. I think we both know that.
If I understand correctly, you're asking me why the LGBT community won't be critical of itself?
I think LGBT isn't really LGBT anymore. Not that the old community was much better, but its population actually represented its label. However, I haven't lived through that era so I can't comment too much on it. I think the overbearing inclusivity of the LGBT brand has allowed its voice to be hijacked by exhibitionists and kinksters who capitalized on the stereotype that gay = sexual deviancy in every form. A good chunk of them are probably straight as well.
So any gay person who turns to this community for help only gets pressured to comply with that image, even if they weren't originally prone to promiscuous behavior.
Have you never asked yourself why it became a defense of sexual deviancy in every form? Why did those who lead the charge create a culture of "overbearing inclusivity"?
I like that term, overbearing inclusivity. It's apt.
I'm not sure how this is a strawman. I never denied there was a correlation, I'm just saying that it doesn't equal causation.
My point is that it doesn't matter whether it's correlation or causation; it's still a vector through which we identify a very significantly increased level of pedofilia, promiscuity and STDs. The fact whether some people erronously view it may have bearings on your personal experiences, which I'm sure can be dissatisfying, but it doesn't have bearing on understanding the issue.
It is still a datapoint that demands answers. What are your views on why there is correlation and what makes you think that it isn't/ might not be causation?