Containment What If?

[CatParty]

Less "what if barb died" threads.

 

[Watcher]

He would raise Chris in the lumberjack ways

 

[Rev. Rye]

His life might have been a little less fucked-up than it is now. I mean, he lived with Bob apart from Barb for a few years (mostly High School) and even Chris considered it the happiest time of his life.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

What if Chris aged backwards?

Spoiler

But I still wanted to ask, lol. Not make a thread for it, I've made enough bad threads lately.

 

[Stratochu]

Bob would have been like a geezer dad version of Tiger Mom in some ways, he may have lived into his 90s without black mold and bedbugs fucking him up, Chris would not have a ticking time bomb for a car, Bob would have likely found an educated senior woman who would be better for him and than , this hypothetical woman would have arranged for all of Chris' needs after she and Bob were infirm or dead, and Chris would still be an autistic nutbar, but wouldn't be the waste of charity, oxygen, q-sand ingredients, insurance money and taxpayer dollars he is now, would be living independently with the help of a home health aide and seeing a licensed clinical social worker or psychologist instead of Rocky, would have had the same well-worn blue Aerostar that was Bob's second to last car in real life for nearly 20 years but in decent condition, he may work part-time at a game, comic or pawnbroker store to supplement his , Sonichu wouldn't have been blood-fantasy furry porn, Snyder would be able to carry on normally, and he may even have a girlfriend and some buddies to play TCGs with at the Starbucks or Panera in Midlothian.

In short, he'd be par for the course by middle-aged neckbeard standards, albeit a bit of a hothead and a bit eccentric, and would have geezer parents in a nursing home that he may actually visit and bring (non-q-sand) food & gifts to.

 

[normankrasner]

Chris probably would have stayed in Richmond after HS, gone to a nearby community college, gotten suspended, and taken longer than necessarily to a earn degree, and gotten banned from fast food chains, malls, and big box stores during his love quest, and would have probably stalked the Galpals stiil in town forcing them to get a restraining order, he probably would have hung around MHS years after he graduated, Barb would have horded up whatever place they were living, and Chris would burn it down with a coffee maker in the bathroom

 

[Watcher]

Chris would become a wigger in an inner city.

Or a... wiggo.

 

[Coldgrip]

Chris probably would have stayed in Richmond after HS, gone to a nearby community college, gotten suspended, and taken longer than necessarily to a earn degree, and gotten banned from fast food chains, malls, and big box stores during his quest, and probably stalk the Galpals stiil in town forcing them to get a restraining order, he'd probably would have hung around MHS years after he graduated

So in other words, he'd still be a spoiled jerkass manbaby. So nothing would of really changed.

 

[normankrasner]

Chris probably would have stayed in Richmond after HS, gone to a nearby community college, gotten suspended, and taken longer than necessarily to a earn degree, and gotten banned from fast food chains, malls, and big box stores during his quest, and probably stalk the Galpals stiil in town forcing them to get a restraining order, he'd probably would have hung around MHS years after he graduated

So in other words, he'd still be a spoiled jerkass manbaby. So nothing would of really changed.

just in a different place

 

[CatParty]

Chris probably would have stayed in Richmond after HS, gone to a nearby community college, gotten suspended, and taken longer than necessarily to a earn degree, and gotten banned from fast food chains, malls, and big box stores during his quest, and probably stalk the Galpals stiil in town forcing them to get a restraining order, he'd probably would have hung around MHS years after he graduated

So in other words, he'd still be a spoiled jerkass manbaby. So nothing would of really changed.

just in a different place

Kind of like if one were to place him in NYC or Las Vegas

 

[Sovandie]

Probably more real-life encounters with trolls, from my understanding Richmond is bigger and somewhere that people are more likely to go (being a capital city rather than some backwater redneck town). Honestly if there were more things for him to go out and do and more opportunity to see him do it, I think the weens would have stormed him and it could have turned into a real-life harassment/stalking situation at the height of it.

In a roundabout way, yes.
If it transpired that I was seeking disabled employees (because of being offered wage subsidies from an employment agency or whatever) - I'd pick Chris over someone with a "worse" disability. Realistically, dealing with Chris' foolishness would be easier than accommodating someone with a severe physical or mental impediment. Stick him on night-fill or cleaning duty and have him shadow a competent, understanding (and patient) employee who can keep him in line. Done.

Well, that would only work if the other person's disability was not only severe, but they had failed utterly at learning to cope with it and be a productive human being. I know a guy with no legs. Literally nothing below the waist, as in his body just ends right at his wheelchair seat. He'd still do pretty much any job better than Chris, even stocking shelves, simply because he has the drive (and superior physical strength) to work instead of whining and flaking.

Oh absolutely, I used "impediment" rather than "disability" to mean something which made it significantly and irreparably difficult for them to adjust to work. I completely agree that disability and impediment don't always directly correlate, probably should have worded that better.

Honestly I think Chris would have had an alright chance at a public university over here, there a lot more lenient with special admissions and HECS takes care of your tuition until you're making $37,000+ p/a. Even so, he'd stumble through his BA and either flunk it, drop out or be thrown out, then spend the rest of his life doing nothing because Bob would convince him to never earn above the HECS threshold.

 

[Stratochu]

What would Chris be if he was really a retarded Autobot?

 

[CatParty]

What would Chris be if he was really a retarded Autobot?

a retarded autobot.

 

[Some JERK]

Chris's problem is that he's massively entitled and egotistical, but too to carry out his selfish plans to any real success.

Bob was the least bad of the two, but let's be honest, he wasn't just some old man who was too tired to take a stand against his wicked wife's corrupting influence on their son. He was complicit with basically everything Barb taught to Chris about life and his place in it, especially on the subject of entitlement. Remember that they BOTH showed up at the GAMe PLACe trying to intimidate people with threats of legal action. I'm not saying that Bob was crazy like Barb obviously is, but if Bob had raised him on his own, Chris would probably still be an autistic, entitled jerk.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

What would Chris be if he was really a retarded Autobot?

He'd be the star of "Convoy no Nazo."

 

[exball]

What if Chris aged backwards?

Spoiler

But I still wanted to ask, lol. Not make a thread for it, I've made enough bad threads lately.

He'd still be fat and gay.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

I believe Henry Bemis's signature once said that saying Bob was the better parent was like saying Igor did a better job than Frankenstein at keeping the monster restrained. It may be true, but it's their fault that the monster exists anyway.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

I don't think there would be much difference. As others have noted, Bob seems to have pretty much laid down the foundations for OPL. Maybe Chris would have a more realistic view of himself without Barb telling him how handsome he is, and maybe he'd be less of a spoilt brat, but he'd most likely still be a waste of space.

 

[WiseOldBadger]

He still would have put the minimum amount of effort into raising him, and would have been a passive and negligent parent to say the least.

Opprotunities to help his son succeed would be all around him, and he would not do anything to help Chris obtain them.

Seriously, would he, or did he ever read any autism literature, like Temple Grandin's books, or "Let me hear your Voice?" There is plenty of indication he read a lot of things ( history, War books, books on other countries) but never gave autism much of a look.

 

[Henry Bemis]

Chris has tried- and failed-at emulating his father's shrewdly manipulative bullying (with a dash of Cartman, for good measure). If Bob ever had sole custody, we'd see a lot more of that from Chris.