Containment What If?

[Vault Boy]

What if Chris made a video of himself trying to light his farts on fire?

 

[Pocoyo]

What if Chris made a video of himself trying to light his farts on fire?

He'd end up burning down the house again.

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris spontaneously combusted?

 

[Somar]

What if Chris went back in time to make sure he was born female?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

What if Chris started getting really into stoner metal?

 

[Vault Boy]

What if Chris spontaneously combusted?

His last actions would be to stress sigh, shit his pants, and then do nothing.

What if Chris was a Witcher?

 

[Muncie Anderson]

What if Chris became a blues musician?

Almost everyone else would doubt his authenticity, no matter how many times he sang about the crossroads.

 

[normankrasner]

what if Chris started a fraternity during his 5 years at PVCC?

 

[Apocalypso]

Et si Chris était un Parisien?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

Almost everyone else would doubt his authenticity, no matter how many times he sang about the crossroads.

o my sweetheart left me
my sweetheart left me
left me for a man named clyde
so now i'm here at these crossroads
here at these crossroads tonight

now i ain't got no money
so i go and beg on the web
no i ain't got no money
and i'm in crushing debt

my cat sure does love me
but that just ain't enough
i need a pretty sweetheart
to build from the ground up

so now i'm here at these crossroads
and my whole life just ain't right
now i'm here at these crossroads
singing them sonichu blues tonight

(To the tune of Robert Johnson's Me And The Devil Blues)

 

[Kip Winger Super Saiyan 4]

What if Chris started getting really into stoner metal?

Stoner metal would lose its appeal.

What if Chris was in one of those WWE TLC matches at Wrestlemania and got speared by Edge off the ladder through a table?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

Stoner metal would lose its appeal.

>Not listening to Dopesmoker on repeat for a week straight.

Then again, Chris doesn't smoke weed, so I think that's his major problem right there. The sheer religious ecstasy of that riff would be utterly lost on him.

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris lived with Oscar the Grouch?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

What if Chris lived with Oscar the Grouch?

He kind of already does

 

[shecameforcwc]

What if Chris turned into a lesbian soul because of the "Advice" Phil have to him, telling him to be more open minded?

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris ate himself to death?

 

[Somar]

What if Chris ate himself to death?

Cover him in Mcdonalds Grease and he might actually do this.
What if Chris and Barb went on a road trip around the country?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

What if Chris and Barb went on a road trip around the country?

A more autistic version of that movie Into The Wild, where Chris doesn't "find himself" and have beautiful experiences but just complains and plays on his 3DS all day.

Alternatively, a more autistic version of this album. Without the sincerity and sweetness and with more bitterness, arguing, and stops at Mcdonald's.

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris groped Hillary Clinton?

 

[feedtheoctopus]

What if Chris groped Hillary Clinton?

Jail.