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📚 MegathreadTranny Sideshows on Social Media - Any small-time spectacle on Reddit, Tumblr, Twitter, Dating Sites, and other social media.
This is a real thing that is found in elderly men. One theory is that the Y chromosome, being so small and weird compared to other chromosomes, is more vulnerable to errors during cell division. It's one of the few chromosomes that can be removed from a cell without the cell completely dying, so you see cells with missing Y's crop up over time.
What these chucklefucks conveniently forget to mention in their triumphant gotcha one-liners is that 1) it's usually just found in some blood cells, not the whole body, and 2) missing Y is linked to short life expectancy, cancer, and Alzheimer's. In younger males, it's associated with infertility and developmental disorders.
Lol @ these troons thinking that mosaic loss of the Y chromosome in somatic cells has ANYTHING to do with their sex fantasies. This is the most popsci understanding of what chromosomes are I've ever seen. It's stupid enough that these faggots have co-opted intersex disorders into their pseudoscience but mLOY is just flat out unrelated to their cause. Indeed, this must be the advanced biology they are always telling us about.
Did he really name himself 'Teha'?
In Russian, 'Te-ha' is pretty much how you say 'Be Quiet' or 'Shut up!'
Wait! Himdia, Did you just say you didn't see any trannys at the 'Fabulous at 50' LGBTQ event?
Are you trying to tell us that you can tell who is trans just by looking?!
That's not very 'tranny coloured glasses' of you...
(And I'd like to think that if Diana had lived for a few more decades, and had time to settle into being the woman she wanted to be, that she might have grown a spine.
She would, at least, have been very conflicted between the Trannys and the TERFs.)
THANK YOU! @Joshi_zarna!
Awesome PFP! sorry Jilldo, I'll come back to you later maybe...
I don't know what the fuck is going on here besides mental illness, but I'm cracking up at fatty wheeling herself all the way to the steps, then just jumping out of the chair and striding up the steps!
Man, I wanted to see the comments for myself and this doozy jumped out
Maddie, sweety, both of these ideas are terrible, horrible, appalling, atrocious, really really bad ideas.
Also, surely both of them realise that their kids are going to say it anyway, right? Right??
What I find fascinating is that transgender parents who wish to be stealth seem clueless about the fact that they are handing their children the perfect ammunition for rebellion. If you impart upon your children that you have a very important secret to hide and that it's vital that it never gets out, you've given them quite a bit of power over you if they reveal it, and teenagers especially are notorious for abusing power purely because they're crazy little turds learning how far they can take things before consequences befall them. (This is a necessary part of development, but we've lost the plot as a society because the teenagers who push boundaries now never face proper punishment for going too far - but that's a spergout for another day.)
The thing is, most normal folks don't view outing people's birth sex as a matter of life or death, so the people around them will likely make them feel as if it isn't much of a secret to keep should they actually admit to it; furthermore, it's generally pretty fucked up to force kids to keep secrets on your behalf because it puts immense pressure on them which can give them weird issues around intimacy, vulnerability and secret-keeping later on down the line. (You see similar problems afflict children of alcoholics, criminals and other unsavory characters where innocent kids are made to live a double-life because of their parents' insistence, and the fact that people would rather protect their self-images over raising their kids to be well-adjusted is a testament to their poor parenting skills.)
And this is all operating under the concept that these parents actually do pass as their target sex! What of children whose parents are very obvious Socks and Sophies, where they're expected to maintain a "secret" that's obvious to everyone around them? Do you know how horribly humiliating it'd be to finally get the courage to confide in a friend that your parent is transgender, and then your friend just goes "No shit, retard, everyone can tell, couldn't you?" Which doesn't even account for the children who aren't aware their parents are transgender - as some parents want to be stealth to their families... as in, not even letting their own children in on the secret.
Basically, if you have pronouns, you shouldn't be allowed to raise kids in any meaningful capacity until you give up the ghost on your ego. Great men and women have grown from the soil of the selfish and cruel, but never is their growth because of the ground - it is always in spite of it.
But I know all of you already know that, so I'm just preaching to the choir. Thread tax time!
I see this discussion come up every now and then about whether or not it's ethical to lie in order to maintain stealth status, and it usually turns into people saying you don't have to "lie" you can just tell half truths or what have you. And while that's a fine way of approaching things, I want to chime in and say you can (and should) straight up lie. If you need to lie to answer a question or tell a story without outing yourself, then lie. It's not a big deal and it doesn't make you a bad person.
Now, there is a difference between protecting yourself and misrepresenting yourself. Changing the details of a childhood story to not out yourself is technically lying, but ethically fine. Changing the events of the story, or adding things that didn't happen, is misrepresenting yourself and is wrong.
But that's really all there is to it. Do what you have to do to protect yourself. If you feel morally queasy about lying to not out yourself, then you might reconsider whether or not it is worth it to you to be stealth.
After a random woman on Reddit expresses that men receive male socialization regardless of how they view themselves, a man in a dress writes a presumptuous screed in which he purports that trannies do not, in fact, get treated like boys; instead, he argues, trannies are treated as female from the get-go and internalize all the same things girls do, which means they have very little to unlearn as they troon out. Personally, I think trannies are "freak socialized" - where everyone around you can tell something about you is not quite right and treat you accordingly based on whether they are sympathetic to or repelled by your demeanor - so when they speak of other boys bullying them, they think the rejection stems from their inner girlhood rather than the fact that they're just off-putting and weird. Face it, guys: boys didn't bully you because of your innately pink girlsoul, but because they could tell just looking at you that you were probably the sort of kid to wipe a finger between your asscheeks and smell it right after, and nobody wants to hang out with Billy Buttfingers, okay? Link | Archive
I was responding to a comment on girldinnerdiarys of this woman telling a trans girl who was mounring her pain of being born the wrong gender and how it fucked her up. She responded by saying its now the trans womans job to unlearn the damaging male socialisation like cis men have to. So i wrote this and now i need to dump it somewhere.
You misunderstand that trans women arent unhappy about learning 'problematic things', its that we were raised and treated as the entirely wrong gender despite suffering and thinking the same as cis women. We usually got bullied horrifically by other boys for being too girly or soft and yet were told to respond to things like a man, in a manner we just werent built for. A way that fundamentally breaks us down systematically as we see an alternative socialisation shoved in our faces constantly, and get told we dont get to do that. Because youre a boy. We didnt get a man's socialisation, we got a trans woman's socialisation. One that tears our self esteem apart and teaches us to be ashamed of everything we naturally are and change to fit the world, not our self image like every cis person has the right to do.because our baseline is perverted, sick and trying to take advantage of womens bathrooms and sports and is sick.
And your first response to someone grieving their stolen childhood is to say unlearn problematic behaviours just like a cis man? You know the people we get told we are like constantly?
Ill explain it plainly so you dont take the wrong thing from this. Trans women are happy to unlearn anything problematic weve been taught - we actively do so as part of our transition as we can live a socialisation which doesnt degrade us for our base instincts and actually speaks to us. We also dont have as many things to unlearn, remember, cis men hated us as we grew up because of who we are naturally, of course we dont internalise male ideals, weve always viewed ourselves as the women in media and stories and fiction, and know a lot of male shit is stupid!
When you make that the only thing you comment about when discussing a sensitive issue, you come off as self serving and unempathetic.
Look i know you probably dont know much about trans people, i get we are a minority and you hear a lot of debate about us but not from us (unless its weirdos with shitty ott makeup in a dress with a beard, which i can promise you isnt whar most trans girls look like), but it really isnt right to say we had male socialisation, and its a thing you also have to unlearn.
A TiF who has a policy of not fucking normal people reconsiders her stance on the matter - though she doesn't seek to budge from her position in matters of love, only in matters of lust. Remember, everyone, it's only okay for them to have preferences and boundaries and never anyone else, and if you question these double standards, you're basically saying we should close down every pizza joint in the country so that they can all have their ovens commandeered for tranny genocide. And if you've ever eaten pizza from Papa John's, you won't even notice a difference in flavor! Link | Archive
i’m a trans guy & i’ve always described myself as t4t, on the reasoning that i can’t imagine being romantic with someone or being sexual with them & then talking about some horrible transphobia-related news & not having them know that same grief ifykwim? i hope that makes sense.
but lately i’ve been finding myself tentatively open to engaging in sexual activities with cis people. i’m still not so sure i would date a cis person for the same reasons listed above, but like as a hookup or fwb ive been feeling open to it.
what do yall think? is this different from the reverse of a cis person wanting to fuck but not date trans people? does the reasoning actually matter?
kind of for cis & trans people. & also as a larger question beyond myself.
thanks!
A natural woman makes the brave - or perhaps stupid - trek into the swamp of r/asktransgender to ask a question I'm sure we've all wanted the answer to: what does "cis privilege" exactly entail? Redditroons, of course, are only more than happy to elaborate... Link | Archive
Hello!
I’m a cisgender woman that is curious about the trans community and would like to learn more. At this time, I’ve been thinking about all that I take for granted about being a cis woman. I have my own disadvantages, yes. But even with my own misgivings about being a woman, I’ve never had anyone call my own womanhood into question. Honestly, it is a strange feeling to watch some fight so hard to be recognized as something that always felt like bit of a burden.
Nevertheless, cis privilege has always felt rather invisible to me until I recognized just how many people go without it. So if you’re willing to share, what does cis privilege look like? What is it like to go without it?
And also, if you don’t mind, what are some things that you’d like to share about yourself that doesn’t have to do with being trans? Hobbies, interests, aspirations? I’d love to know whatever you’re passionate about.
Thank you!
[–]justbrowsing759
Not having to worry about bathrooms/bathroom laws, healthcare access, not dealing with professional setbacks due to transitioning, you're at less risk for SA then a trans woman, if you commit a crime you'd go to the correct jail, among many other things.
This is a frightening accurate list of cis privilege and the exact things that keep me up at night as some who mostly passes but has had her t clocked plenty.
What's worse is it only took me 3 seconds to think of. There's probably 50 other things I didn't even think of. And as a trans man, I missed a lot of the privileges that a cis woman would have over a trans woman specifically.
Even when you do have access to healthcare, quite a few providers are so quick to blame the hrt for your health issues or already have that preconceived idea we're all mentally ill so they do have a half assed job on the medical assessment since we're just "making stuff up"
[–]Singer-Such People generally treat you better as a cis person. I pass fairly well as a woman but as soon as I come out, people look at me funny. Friendly flirtations stop. People become uncomfortable. It is a miserable thing to experience.
[–]JackalFlash
When I think of cisgender privilege, I think of different things like:
Not having to worry about which public bathrooms and changing areas, if any, are legal or safe for you to use (assuming you're not gender nonconforming)
Having your gender legally recognized by default and not having to jump through a bunch of legal hoops to have your gender accurately reflected on your identification, if the government in your location even legally recognizes your gender to begin with.
Not having to worry about people scrutinizing your IDs because the inaccurate gender marker doesn't match your appearance
People don't ask you what your "real name" is and generally respect the terms you use to identify yourself
Access to respectful and quality medical care, without fear of being turned away because providers "don't treat people like you," having every medical problem blamed on your gender identity or hormone medications, or having to explain your identity to the provider because they didn't learn much (if anything at all) about people like you during their education. The same applies to mental health professionals
Not needing to get signed documentation from a mental health professional that likely has zero lived experience of your circumstances in order to receive medically necessary procedures.
People generally recognize that it's inappropriate to ask questions about your reproductive anatomy
Your identity is not seen as some sort of disorder or medical pathology in need of fixing
Ability to date or engage in romantic/sexual relationships without fear over how/if to disclose your identity status, and whether this disclosure will lead to rejection, accusations of harm or deception, or violence against you
You aren't perceived as sexually deviant or a threat to children on the basis of simply existing with your gender identity status
Entertainment media provides a variety of characters that represent you without resorting to tokenism or demeaning stereotypes when they represent you at all (other marginalized statuses notwithstanding)
You are able to fill out forms that ask for your identity descriptions without being questioned, encountering conflicting options, or having your identity not included as an option on the form
Medical and scientific texts assume your anatomy and identity is the default, and include accurate info that acknowledges how your body looks and works
Not feeling uncertain of whether gendered terms like men/women, male/female are intended to include you and the way your body looks when people use them.
Gendered clothing is generally designed with your bodily proportions in mind
People do not express doubt as to whether you are old enough or have enough cognitive capacity to genuinely know your gender identity
Being jailed with people that share your gender identity instead of being forced into a gendered space that doesn't reflect your identity or being isolated from others altogether.
[–]Bliniverse Not having to spend in the thousands of tens of thousands of dollars to just look and function like almost everyone else of your gender, not being told by even """"allies""" that going through opposite gender puberty is an acceptable thing to do to a child (because clearly we're too stupid to know what gender we are /sneed), knowing that if you want to go to the bathroom, you just can, if you want to play on a sport team for your gender, you just can, you don't have to spend hundreds to thousands of hours of effort training your voice just so you can sound normal, and know that even with that effort you'll never be able to sing like you used to, if you need the safety of a female only space, you'll get it, you never have to second guess if even well meaning people don't perceive you as a woman just because of how your body looks, people won't assume any remotely masculine trait about you is because of "male socialization" or a sign you're "actually a man", and much, much more.
[–]Ksnj
Anyone ever ask for “preferred” name? Or worse, your “real name?” (The bad way)
>Ive never had anyone call my own womanhood into question
>it always felt rather invisible to me
How many people ask when you’re going to have the surgery? Anyone ever talk about how your “socialization” means that you’re automatically different and othered? Ever had to worry about how a haircut might cause others to treat you like a predator because they see you as a man?
Ever had to explain to a doctor why you can’t get pregnant because their dumbass didn’t read the chart?
[–]TweeTildes I think it's important to recognize that when a trans woman fights for recognition to be seen as a woman, the alternative is not being treated as a man. The alternative is being treated as a "trnny," a third category inferior to the other two. If they are visibly trans or out as trans, people do not treat them as cis men. Once they start transitioning/presenting as women, male privilege is not a real option. And even before that point, the alternative is suppressing who you are, a fate just as, if not more, bleak as what closeted gay people experience (which is not straight privilege). It's not a choice. Someone just *is trans. They can try to suppress it or hide it, but that cannot be done without suffering, which in many cases ends in suicide.
I myself am a trans man. There is a misconception that trans men get to escape misogyny and benefit from male privilege. But while I experienced more frequent, near daily misogyny living as a woman, as a trans man, I get to experience misogyny when people realize/know I am trans as well as transphobia on top of that. For instance, as a teacher,I dealt with transphobic harassment from students that nearly cost me my job and forced me to get a restraining order. I never would have gone through that as a cis woman. And I have heard similar stories from other trans educators.
As a trans person, I am limited on what states I can travel to. I am planning on going on a cruise with my mother but it leaves from Florida, which is a dangerous state for trans people due to their anti-trans laws, including the bathroom laws. My mother and step-dad sometimes use the wrong pronouns and have accidentally outed me to people who see me as a man. I am worried about her outing me and putting me in danger. I continuously worry about the fate of trans people in this country. A friend of mine moved to Europe and I have considered doing the same.
[–]Chase_High
Well, we have to fight much harder for things that are simply given to 99% of the population at birth. I think other commenters hit the broad strokes so i’ll give some more specific examples. We all have to figure out our gender expression at some point, and cis people simply do this naturally as they grow up. They learn how people of their gender act, talk, and dress gradually over the course of their life and incorporate those things as they see fit. For us trans people, that whole process is usually confusing and distressing until we figure out why it’s not working for us. For those of is figuring it out as adult, we have a period where we have to go through exploring our own gender expression that most people go through as children and teenagers. As a trans woman, I had to do things like learn makeup and how to dress as an adult which can be embarrassing and even dangerous depending on where we live. It’s small things like this that cis people don’t have to consider, that for trans people are quite serious and sometimes life and death and permeate all aspects of our lives.
On a more positive note! Finally coming to terms with my femininity really set me free. Society teaches us all that to be feminine is to be lesser and I internalized that for years. I made sure to hide or repress any femininity I had out of fear. But once I finally quit fighting myself and sat down to do the hard work of figuring myself out, I was shocked how easily and naturally being feminine came. I’ve reclaimed what the world told me was my biggest weakness and made it my most confident feature! To be joyous and unashamed in your femininity is to be revolutionary against a system that relies on our misery and self criticism.
[–]Mahalia_of_Elistraee Im not sure if this counts as a privilege, but not having crippling dysphoria would be one. For me it's worse than my ptsd, and for many you could probably count it as a disability due to how much distress it causes, but I guess that would be closer to abled privilege.
Not having to see the vile things people say about trans people is definitely one. I can't go a day on socials without seeing a transphobe spewing vitriol at us.
Then there's the normal ones like being able to use the restroom freely, not being put in the men's prison when you're a woman and vise versa, not having to worry about losing your access to gender affirming care (if you can't produce endogenous hormones due to bottom surgery, this could literally be a death sentence due to heart problems) not getting harassed and assaulted specifically because they're not trans. Cis women can use the "women driver's" option in Uber without worrying about the drivers kicking you out because they don't see you as a woman then reporting you for it. (I cant drive and this is a constant fear of mine.)
Oh, and cis people don't risk being disowned by their entire family just for being themselves
I like to draw, write, binge watch tv shows and anime, and exercise daily. I also love learning about geology. It's my absolute favorite scientific subject.
[–]Zeyode
When I talk about cis privilege, it's usually like "things they don't have to worry about on account of being cis". Like to give some examples
there's gender dysphoria, which is basically your brain torturing itself until you transition to the "correct gender". Would not wish that on my worst enemy, yet somehow a lot of cis people feel comfortable forcing that on trans kids and call it a "moderate position". Literal body horror shit that can drive you to suicide. Most cis people will never have to experience it, so a lot of them don't even understand what the big deal is. (Feels so good to get rid of though! I don't think I've been happier! And it's allowed me to appreciate womanhood in a different light I think, cause I had to fight for it.)
Womanhood constantly being in question can cause a lot of insecurity and self hatred, yeah, especially in combination with that first bullet point. Just an extra kind of hurtful.
V coding. Basically prison-sanctioned sex slavery of trans women in men's prisons that a lot of states keep sending us to. They send us to the dangerous ones as a treat to keep them in line apparently.
Constantly being terrorized by governments in general really, be it through denial of healthcare we need to live a life worth living, or through banning us from using public restrooms to the point where they set up bounties for it, or even just branding us as terrorists like the US government just did. Even if you live in a blue state, it feels like there's a sword of damacles hanging over your neck at all times, which is why I'm writing this high!
And also, if you don’t mind, what are some things that you’d like to share about yourself that doesn’t have to do with being trans? Hobbies, interests, aspirations? I’d love to know whatever you’re passionate about.
I like writing and videogames! I don't think any of what I write is actually that good, it's more just a creative outlet. Been trying to get back into coding too, but adhd makes it hard even though I enjoy it.
I'm not sure I really have any aspirations. Kinda just coasting through life atm, trying to find a job I can do. I couldn't cut it through college, and I've got a bad back from scoliosis surgery I had, so my options are limited.
[–]EchoNB
Cis privilege means you won't be barred from using public bathrooms (assuming you are gender comforming). Cis privilege means you can change your own body's looks regarding gender without the need for psychological evaluation.
Cis privilege means you can get prescribed puberty blockers as a kid without politics getting involved in your medical care. Cis privilege means the way your anatomy works is shown in science classes.
Cis privilege means nobody will force you to live as another gender that isn't yours.
Cis privilege means you will belong to gendered spaces made for your gender without question.
These are the ones I managed to think about.
[–]-megan-yolo- to me it means not having to worry about going to a concentration camp or have organized campaigns of hate against you, like the newly formed "Greater than campaign" which is a coalition of people and organizations of hate https://glaad.org/gap/greater-than-campaign/ or worry about getting lynched, being paid less, getting beat by a cis man cause I used a bathroom, having my DL taken away (Kansas), having the fed gvt restrict what my gender is oon my passport and social security card...on and on. Serious Nazi fascist stuff....
[–]EnvironmentalMix892
In much the same way heterosexual privilege means not being scared of hearing about legal camps meant to torture you. In the same way that being white means you're not afraid of the cops passing you by or stopping you at a traffic light.
Take bathroom and sports laws for instance. We're being segregated from public life and put into the incorrect spaces as a punishment for transness. For trans women like me, this means sharing spaces with men in bathrooms, in prisons, in anything competitive or recreational, in schooling institutions, dorms, etc.
Imagine being told tomorrow that you've been selected for a program to try and "reconcile the differences between men and women". As a part of this federally mandated program, you're going to share all of the aforementioned spaces with men and be unallowed to share those spaces with women under threat of imprisonment (with men). Given the cisnormative patriarchal system we live in that tells cis men above all that they can be violent and get away with it, it'd obviously be terrifying. Terrifying to be outnumbered and dehumanized. That's what we go through. With no foundations in science, no statistical basis. We're told we're "male socialized" and denied safe spaces. Put in with people that can and will hurt us. And that's in the progressive parts of the world. Not to mention that cis people don't get executed or life in jail for being cis in any parts of the world, nor are medically important procedures like organ transplants or insulin ever called "cosmetic" as a reason as to why they're not important and should be paid out of the ass for.
Add onto this that we aren't safe around cis women either, that we're ill-defined in legislature, and being pushed into suicide even if we don't share community with cis people, and we're undergoing a social genocide that cis people have never faced for being cis. 1 in 5 people with gender dysphoria take their lives. That's 20 percent of all the kids forced to undergo the wrong puberty, of the people denied hormone replacement therapy and surgery. When laws exist to explicitly make accessing these things harder for us, how can it be taken as anything other than genocide?
[–]Fun_Friens
My small addition early on:
Bathrooms. As an MtF penis haver and being early in my journey. I am on HRT. I am very clocky. Even fully femme presenting. I am getting more and more afraid of going into the men's. I have size working for me but have lost strength.
I couldnt fight off an attack to either harm me directly or other things.
At the same time. I dont feel like I could enter that space: The womens bathroom. For the flip side reason: causing a panic or issues.
I just want to pee damn it. I do not want to rape anyone. I just want to urinate, maybe touch up my makeup and wash my hands to move on.
Its hard to go pee. And I have to do it more often it feels even without spiro (monotherapy)
Can I go in yet? I'm scared both ways.
[–]Satisfaction-Motor
All examples given below are on the basis of being cis. Some examples — like being infantilized — you might also experience, but because of different parts of your identity, not because you are cis. There are many forms of oppression that overlap. I’ve got a real specific example — there are limited gender affirming care clinics in my area. I have to change insurance right now — my options are a continuation of my old insurance (very expensive), or my employer’s insurance. It is a $375 monthly difference. My employer’s insurance does not cover ANY of the providers in my area that can do Gender Affirming Care — so my options are to pay an extra $4,500 a year, or to switch clinics and drive 2.5 hours (one way) to maybe get care.
Medically necessary surgeries are often paid for out of pocket, and run hundreds of thousands of dollars.
In my country, I also need to consistently worry about my medical care being banned.
Job discrimination is a straight forward one Trans people fair worse in pretty much every stat. For example, in the majority of places, trans men make less than cis women on average (all trans people make less, I am using this specific example because people might assume trans men, on account of being men, make more than cis women). All trans people experience sexual violence and interpersonal violence at a rate much higher than cis people.
You don’t have to think about what bathroom to go in. You don’t need to worry (as much) about being assaulted or harassed about the bathroom you go in
Your documents — passports, IDs, etc. — will be accurate for you. As an example, there won’t be a mismatch between your appearance and your gender marker (if you have one in your country) You don’t have to worry about people treating you (negatively) differently if they find out you are cis, even if they treated you well before
You don’t have to worry about people calling you the wrong thing (name, pronouns, etc) on the basis of being cis. You also won’t have people argue with you over those things, on the basis of being cis. You won’t be treated like a predator and/or infantilized for being cis.
Trans people are subjected to stricter gender roles than cis people. If a trans person is too gender conforming, they are accused of being a stereotype. If they are nonconforming, they will be accused of faking being trans and won’t be gendered correctly. Dammed if you do, dammed if you don’t. You don’t have to deal with people walking on eggshells around you, treating you like a sensitive and easily offended person, as if you’ll go to HR just because they breathed in the same room as you.
You won’t have people asking you inappropriate questions about your genitals or how you have sex, and they will see NOTHING wrong with it. If you are unwilling to answer such invasive questions, you’ll be seen as rude. You don’t have to worry about people rejecting you purely because of your past medical history, even if you are exactly their type in ALL ways.
You don’t have to worry about a partner forcing you or coercing you to stop life-saving medical care. (For example, sometimes trans men are forcibly impregnated to try and force them to detransition) You don’t have to worry (as much) about malgendering. Malgendering is when someone ONLY genders you correctly to abuse you. For example, in ICE detention camps, some trans men were forced into dangerous labor without PPE, and then told something along the lines of “you wanted to be a man, so man up.” Malgendering is different from regular sexism because you only get gendered correctly for the purposes of abuse.
I do want to circle back and say that many, if not all, of these can be experienced on other bases (like race or disability). But you won’t experience them based on your cis-ness, you’d experience them for those other things.
Edit: I wanted to add on, every health concern being blamed on gender-affirming treatment, in the same manner that every health concern gets labeled as a menstruation symptom or anxiety for cis women. I’ve expressed repeatedly that my health got better when I started Testosterone — my doctors still blame every symptom on it, when they couldn’t find answers.
Edit: trans people are also sometimes coerced into sex work to survive, if they can’t find work elsewhere. People often see trans people as an “experiment” to discover their sexuality, instead of as people and partners.
To clarify the numbers I listed earlier, regarding insurance, the price increase is an increase of 57%, and the more expensive insurance will take 23% of my yearly income, and costs one week of work per month, just for insurance. I may be able to apply for government assistance, but that is getting gutted — and some areas have blocked government assistance from paying for gender affirming medical care.
[–]InchoateBlob I can't be open about my identity at work, so I have to play a character 100% of the time...that means forming real authentic relationships is nearly impossible. If I do get close to someone and want to be authentic with them I have to work against the inertia of the impression of me that they've already created in their heads. I get misgendered constantly by almost everyone and it stings every time.
And yet, the emotional and cognitive load of playing this character are not tenable long term because my job requires a lot of emotional labor as is.. so I inevitably slip up from time to time and parts of the real me come through in ways I can't always control. Not everyone is as well versed in reading these slip ups which creates a situation where some people know I'm trans and others don't have a clue. Throughout my work day I continuously play this insane game of trying to guess through my interactions who knows and who doesn't while making micro adjustments to my language accordingly. I come back from work every day feeling completely drained.
My hobbies are mostly solitary activities. I like cycling long distances, hiking or walks in the city, watching movies, spending time with my cat.
[–]Xerlith When you go to the store, do people stare?
Do parents grab their kids’ hands when you walk by?
Do you make sure to avoid looking at kids so nobody thinks you’re up to something?
How many years has it been since you could go to a public pool?
When you’re out, how hard do you think about which bathroom you can safely use today?
How robust is your mental map of all the single stall or unisex bathrooms you’ll pass while you’re out? If you get arrested, which jail will they send you to, men’s or women’s?
[–]Infernal-Cattle
I wanted to add on something as a transmasc:
To some extent, having your marginalization recognized, and not getting the side-eye when you talk about them.
Trans women are at significantly higher risks for being abused, at higher risks of being homeless, but can be denied access to women's shelters and often are turned away or discrimated against in homeless shelters. On a smaller scale, often when trans women talk about ANY negative experiences of womanhood they get hit with transphobic comments like "welcome to womanhood."
Trans men also face these issues. Like trans women, we have a disproportionate risk of being assaulted, are at risk for poverty and homelessness because of transphobia, that sort of thing. These sorts of issues - especially anything around reproductive health - are framed as women's issues, but they impact trans men too. Yet when trans men say "hey, we deal with this too" often it's perceived as speaking over women when in reality, we just want included in a conversation that directly impacts us. Even in the conversations around transness, the assumption many cis people make, even well-intentioned allies, is that trans=woman, and transmasc experiences get flattened as "male privilege," even for those of us who are still perceived as women.
[–]Pancakefriday
Many people have covered a lot of things, but in short, being treated like a normal person.
Once people have figured out you're trans, it's a hall pass to start examining every part of your body. The amount of people that look at my face, my breasts, and then my crotch trying to see if I have a bulge is... annoying.
I avoid bathrooms at all costs, and that also means gyms are difficult due to a lot of bathrooms being in the locker room. I've had workers in stores refuse to help me, I was harassed by a group of republicans outside the DMV trying to renew my license. I've had people harass me when trying to grocery shop.
Women's shoes aren't made in my size, so I have to shop "crossdresser" shoes, and that is so demoralizing that I just where unisex toms most of the time. I'd kill for cute, cheap, easy to ship pair of flats.
I think one of the worst things is that we're "fake" men/women in most people's eyes, so they assume everything about you is fake. If I talk about estrogen making me emotional it's "making a caricature of what real women face", if I wear makeup it's "reinforcing gender stereotypes and the patriarchy" if I don't wear make up it's "not trying hard enough to look like a real woman". If I wear jeans and a tshirt it's "You're basically wearing men's clothes why did you even transition?" if I wear a dress it's "My femininity isn't a costume for you".
Having other people constantly tell you what HRT can/can't do (cis people assume it does nothing for some reason?), and I've had people literally tell me I'm delusional, when all I'm doing is reading off the sheet of "What to expect from feminizing HRT" that I got from my doctor. As a trans person, you're a liar. Anything you say is suspect.
You can't win. The worst is when i finally crack and I'm angry and annoyed, and then it's "See, all trans people are crazy and irrational"
Then you just cry.
Then as you start to pass, like I've finally started to after 3 long years, you just end up with the misogyny, which I'm sure you're familiar with. I got skipped for promotion, I get spoken over constantly, I have entry level men talking down to me like I don't have 10yrs experience in my field. I had someone explain to me my own project a few months ago, lol. None of that would've happened before. I can switch my voice back and forth and I've been - this close - to just switching to my old, deep, commanding voice and telling people what's what, but I'm sure that'd make more problems than fix for me, but it's a fun fantasy.
Oh I guess that's a cis privilege, I sound like a cis woman now, but that took several years of lessons with a voice teacher, trans women all have to voice train, so if you ever meet one of us and our voices sound natural and feminine, know she worked real hard for it. i'd say the transphobia is worse than the misogyny, but, at least you know where those assholes stand, and frankly both suck and I deal with both depending on how "passing" I am that day. Misogyny is a whole other beast, and I'm sorry you've dealt with that your whole life.
Also, thank you for letting me vent.
EDIT: I see you were also interested in us, like hobbies and such. I've been learning to draw and make digital art. I love music and can play several instruments, but I'm not terribly amazing at any of them. I'm a software engineer, so I hope to be able to combine my music, art, and coding talents into making a video game one day, but it's slow going.
[–]OkMathematician3439 You got to live your whole life as yourself. Trans people don’t get to have childhoods (it’s worth noting that there are varying degrees of how disconnected a trans person feels to childhood).
[–]RainbowFuchs
Wonderful examples have already been said, so I'll just add three more I've encountered personally : Learned that I apparently pass because I made a new friend last year who ghosted me as soon as she learned I was trans. Like, we hung out a couple times a week, went to the beach, and one day we were talking about dreams. I shared that I dreamt of myself as a woman back when I was a man and she was confused. I'm like "I'm pretty visibly trans, didn't you know?" and then she sent me a text saying not to contact her anymore.
You can confidently flirt without being afraid of being assaulted because of your genitals. Rape and sexual assault is pretty common among trans women too, oddly enough. /shrug
You don't have your mental health questioned because you're cis. You do for being trans, and even then you have to get therapy and paperwork just to prove you're in your right mind and sane and of course I want the surgery I said I want and spent two years advocating for myself for. You can just go get a rhinoplasty willy nilly, I need a certificate from two different providers, even after being on hormones for years... And don't get me started on THAT struggle...
[–]memisbemus42069 Your body didn’t go through the wrong puberty against your will. You do not have to fear being arrested for using the bathroom. When you say you are a woman, people believe you without question. People don’t feel entitled to ask you uncomfortable questions about your anatomy. People do not hate or fear you at first sight. There are not multiple immensely powerful news organizations constantly spreading lies about you being a pedophile or a mass shooter.
Finally, a proud trans girlie wants to hear all about the kinds of sick burns his fellow troons 'n' poons have levied at nasty heckin' transphobes. Before you proceed, we at Pickle Athletics advise that you ease into this session of ocular yoga very gently as we are not legally liable for any detached retinas that may occur from rolling your eyes due to second-hand embarrassment. Link | Archive
Im seriously tired of society being all judgemental and disgusted of us, i believe it should be time to think about something of a good roast or actual fact if we ever had enough.
So, women, men and Non-binaries, what are your best things you ever had said when you finally snapped to a transphobe? I'd be glad to use them but maybe mix up a bunch of words before proceeding.
[–]WriteOnMyTitties
“I’m not trans, just ugly.” They apologize if they think they just insulted an ugly cis woman!
[–]Vexoly
There was a terf coded women's rights thing happening, a mid 40s looking terf was holding a sign with something about chromosomes.
Me: Get a fucking life you sad fuckers!
Her: You're not a woman, you're man in drag Me: Your husband loves it though!
Was mostly funny because of her facial reaction, almost like I hit a nerve. Maybe she was out there because she saw his browser history.
[–]Terror_Visions
“Uh this restroom is for women!” Me: “ok so why are you in here?”
[–]sabotsalvageur Our existence is attested in the oldest surviving literature, the hymn to Inanna credited to a priestess named Enhudanna, c. 2300 BCE; the earliest instance of the Tetragrammaton dates back to c. 1200 BCE. This fun history fact is a trivial counterexample to the assertion that transness is a strictly modern phenomenon. In fact, we pre-date the judeo-christian god by 1100 years
[–]VillageGoblin
"Gonna cut you off right there.. look, I don't know who the heck you are, I'm in my 30s, if I gave a fck what anyone else thought about how I live my life at this point that'd be real fcking sad, don't you think? Do you still care what others think of you?"
"Well of course I do! And you should too, you barely pass as a woman."
"Like I said, I don't care...Do you think I'm gonna give a shit what you say to me when you still depend on the validation of others just to get through the day?"
"Yeah whatever, you'll still never be a real woman!"
"Hey, so if you care about what others think then why do you dress like a depressed middle aged white man?(was a ~40yo cis woman)"
"Fck you tr**y!" She started to leave.
While she was in earshot I called out "by the way, not a trans woman like you assumed! 'We can always tell' YEAH, SURE YOU CAN!"
[–]throwawayaccount0o01
Transphobe said: when you die, people will be able to tell what you are because of your bones !!! I responded “that’ll be pretty hard since I’ll be cremated”..
Transphobe did NOT know how to respond to that
[–]crispyones strangers were being hateful on one of my posts and i said "i hope one day someone loves you as much as you hate us" i thought that was pretty good idk
[–]throwawayaccount0o01
Here’s one that’s not my best comeback, but was probably the most effective.. I felt super unsafe, and had to use the women’s bathroom while travelling. I normally do not pass, and didn’t want to risk it in the men’s bathroom.
While in the washroom, a woman told me I was in the wrong restroom because of my short hair & masculine appearance. it felt great because I am a transgender male, but I was terrified because I normally DO not pass because I’ve only been on HRT for two months. So I just blurted out “oh… I’m recovering from cancer…” as a half-assed excuse for why my hair is so so short.. The look on her face was PRICELESS despite my fear. She profusely apologized, and then scurried into a stall.
TLDR: Cancer is a great excuse for having short hair
[–]gwondsepp
"you probably just mad cause i got more tits than your girl and more dick than you"
[–]Z-Robotics
"there's only 2 genders. are you hole or pole" "why do you wanna know what's in between my legs? are you fantasising about me? so weird"
"no, it's just, trans people are pedophiles"
"youre the one talking about my genitals buddy"
[–]WildheartFreeborn94 In a Discord server I was on a trans friend of mine joined and I was discussing her pronoun situation with the mod team in voice. One of them sussed out she was trans and decided to let his phobic flag fly and start spouting off unprompted about how he wouldn't ever refer to her as a woman if he knew she was (biologically speaking) a male and other bigoted stuff. Even when I said that she wouldn't mind they/them pronouns he kept on with his bullshit. Eventually I got fed up and simply said to him "Well hate to break it to you but you don't get to decide what she wants to be called and her identity isn't about you so shut up." The entire chat went silent and he immediately disconnected. He was removed from the server less than two days later when he tried to personally attack me in the public text chat. Any surprise the guys whole online personality was being from Texas? Sadly it turned out the head admin was also a raging asshole so I had to leave a couple months later, but it felt good at the time.
[–]vr_kettles if something is said to me: "I wish the biggest thing I had to worry about in my life was how other people dressed"
if someone gives me a disgusted look: I remove my mask and clap my tongues. give them a show~
edit: I don't do anything specific or outstanding. If I ever did, I don't remember it. They're people I'll most likely never see again, so I've given up on caring about their opinions.
[–]Grab_Ornery Kindda not super proud of it cus it was kinda mean but when i was in school there was a guy in my year who was really vocal against trans ppl specifically and he came up to me and was like "Your not a woman."
I immediately burst out laughing and every time i saw him for the rest of my school life i'd always just start laughing hysterically
he never mentioned it to me again and from what i was told he stopped mentioning stuff like that to other trans people in my year too.
Transphobes are just cowards like 90% of the time
[–]Quirky_Rub_9044
“At least I’m happy with my body. I’m sure your mom was.. ”
[–]BeautyInTheBr3akd0wn Before everyone at work knew I was transitioning. I over heard a conversation my coworker was saying another coworker “transgender people are mentally I’ll and pedophiles. they all need to be locked up in prison or mental asylums”
This coworker of mine started dating his wife when she was 18 and he was 28 he even went to her prom. So I stepped into the conversation and said “I think 28 year olds who date 18 year olds are mentally I’ll pedophiles and need to be in mental asylums or prison”
His response was “what’s wrong with dating an 18 year old she’s legal” that was all I needed to hear…
[–]ImportanceMinimum212
Probably not the best thing but if I'm getting misgendered I'll just reflect it back and keep acting natural. They get so mad so quickly I think it's funny. Although there was one time I was about to get in a fight and a guy attempted to insult me by calling me "female" but he was too cry baby to even beat me up like he kept saying he would.
( No one was hurt other than him and his wife's feelings )
[–]Firebird_Lilly I've not really snapped but when someone says "I identify as an attack helicopter" I just reply with "I identify as an anti-aircraft missile, you've just been shot down". Don't know if that qualifies
Edit: Also if they say "Trans women can't get pregnant" I just say "Maybe not but your mum can and I'll give her a child she'll actually love".
[–]Unsuccessful_War1914
"Are you a man or a woman?"
Me: Yes the TERF hurt itself in its confusion
Dunno mate.
We're supposed to laugh at little pooners, not grab them by the arm and physically restrain them. Because, despite what a pooner believes, that kinda counts as violence against women. We gentlemen don't ever do that. Not even a short hairstyle is justification.
I hate poonerism as much as the rest of us. I still hope to think my natural reaction would be to defend the woman from this clearly retarded man.
Or, "Now, this might strike some viewers as harsh, but I believe everyone involved in this story should die."
[–]sabotsalvageur Our existence is attested in the oldest surviving literature, the hymn to Inanna credited to a priestess named Enhudanna, c. 2300 BCE; the earliest instance of the Tetragrammaton dates back to c. 1200 BCE. This fun history fact is a trivial counterexample to the assertion that transness is a strictly modern phenomenon. In fact, we pre-date the judeo-christian god by 1100 years
Um, actually the hymn to Inana doesn't mention trannies. It does say "To turn a man into a woman and a woman into a man are yours", that's true. However it also says " To interchange the brute and the strong and the weak and the powerless is yours, Inana." And "To interchange the heights and valleys [...] is yours, Inana." So clearly there's a common motif in Inana being able to change something to the opposite, but to read any kind of trans message into it is probably a few steps to far.
While we're on the topic of loony pooners, this one is stunned by her mother pulling a Reverse Uno on the whole suicide baiting that the gender specials think should be solely their own domain.
Hmm what are you supposed to do? Good question lil pooner... maybe ask Mom cos you did do it to her first.
Some sage advice here from her ever-compassionate fellow pooners. I think we all should remember these wise words, direct from the 41% without even a hint of irony
Theo over here has been circulating on the lesbian radfem Twitter algorithm for the past couple of days for staunchly refusing to accept that males cannot be leabians because lesbians are same-sex attracted. Link
Notice the, "You're not going to convince me" and the "stay in the minority and seethe in the corner."
The male aggression is palatable. The "You're not going to convince me," as if because he made up his mind, no reality exists outside of what he believes. That is further reinforced by his implied threat of using group dynamics to "kicking out" lesbians who dare disagree. The heretics must be punished. The penis must dominate. The group is just a weapon. He ends his screed with, "stay in the minority and seethe in the corner." He gets pleasure visualizing his prey as weak and powerless. He gets a kick out of knowing he has the power to use his identity to turn an entire group against one person, as a means to flaunt his dominance.
The comments:
Lesbian terf rolls in, basically laughing, pointing out the obvious that his group is nothing but TQ+ cultists and that the only reason they agree with him is out of fear.
Looking at the way he talks in the OP, who wouldn't be afraid when these disgusting creeps use threats of ostracization to get their way?
"Larper" lol these men live to DARVO.
The people commenting know what's up. They recognize this as male aggression, but Theo here, is gonna keep pretending to not understand what he's doing.
This "Clark Cunt," guy acting like he talks to terfs God, I hate these posers. If they actually talked to terfs, in real life, instead of threatening to kill them, they probably wouldn't be so delusional. Or maybe, they'll just go on a killing spree. Who tf knows with these schizo gooners.
"The cure for terfism is getting a job and paying rent" says someone who's part of a group notorious for online e-begging and inventing disabilities to avoid working
Did he really name himself 'Teha'?
In Russian, 'Te-ha' is pretty much how you say 'Be Quiet' or 'Shut up!'
Ver archivo adjunto 9227758
Wait! Himdia, Did you just say you didn't see any trannys at the 'Fabulous at 50' LGBTQ event?
Are you trying to tell us that you can tell who is trans just by looking?!
That's not very 'tranny coloured glasses' of you...
(And I'd like to think that if Diana had lived for a few more decades, and had time to settle into being the woman she wanted to be, that she might have grown a spine.
She would, at least, have been very conflicted between the Trannys and the TERFs.)
This guy went from 'Tommy Chong' to 'That's Wrong'
I don't know what the fuck is going on here besides mental illness, but I'm cracking up at fatty wheeling herself all the way to the steps, then just jumping out of the chair and striding up the steps!
The sheer display of cognitive dissonance in this post is staggering. I assure you this is not a troll or bait account
“You can look like me if you take HRT”
Gabe Newell with even bigger moobs.
Realistic transition goal, I guess.
The sheer display of cognitive dissonance in this post is staggering. I assure you this is not a troll or bait account Ver archivo adjunto 9235597
“You can look like me if you take HRT”
Gabe Newell with even bigger moobs.
Realistic transition goal, I guess.
"The cure for terfism is getting a job and paying rent" says someone who's part of a group notorious for online e-begging and inventing disabilities to avoid working
"The cure for terfism is getting a job and paying rent" says someone who's part of a group notorious for online e-begging and inventing disabilities to avoid working
Thread tax time!
”
God, I hate these posers. If they actually talked to terfs, in real life, instead of threatening to kill them, they probably wouldn't be so delusional. Or maybe, they'll just go on a killing spree. Who tf knows with these schizo gooners.
