The "Is Kat Pregnant" speculation thread - MichaelScottShoutingNo.GIF

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Sparkletor dijo:
I could have sworn that Phil slipped up once and said, "Me and Kat can't...we don't want kids"

I don't think Kat will get pregnant because one of them has fertility issues.
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Knowing how the guy turns absolutely any subject about money, I wouldn't be surprised if he almost said, "Me and Kat can't afford a kid" just like he said about the cat and look what transpired there.
 
I guess there is no way of knowing if Kat fucked a weed dealer in high school and got gonnorhea and then was too scared to tell anyone because of her past abuse for being a sinner and then the infection spread and now her ovaries are dead.

She probably just doesn't want kids. She rather live with a 40 year old man, do his laundry, cook his food, and go to work while he plays video games. Kat is even so nice that when she takes Phil shopping they go to the toy aisle first. Phil gets to pick one toy and gets to look at it the whole time. Before they leave Phil has to put it back and he never throws a tantrum because he is a good boy and always is correct.
 
Even if either had interest in it, I don't think Khet is fertile (or she knows a child is a financial strategy that she doesn't need to apply to Phil yet), and Phil is almost certainly impotent from his lifestyle and health.

That freak shot-gun wedding bastard child would have been the most likely shot in a long time.
 
It's highly unlikely, but just for the record January 15th would be 280 days after the wedding. So if Kat was pregnant at the wedding that would be the latest that we would see any funny business. If she was a month pregnant then it would be right before Christmas.

I personally still think it's unlikely though. DSP would definitely be begging hardcore for money right now if Kat was 8 to 8.5 months along.
 
I doubt that Kat will every get pregnant from the Pigroach. I doubt they even fuck, she just has cooks and cleans for him and has some form of companionship/interaction while she has a house to stay in. Part of me really wants to see the Phil Jr saga, but the other part doesn't want the kid brought up in that environment.
 
That Hedonist Nerd dijo:
Hey man, the world needs strippers. This is where they come from.
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do you really want that strippers dad to be phil? they're going to be snorting while giving lap dances "i really need that money baby"
"well sadly, that 1 you put in my thong isn't going to cut it they take 34 cents out of it so... im going to need more"
 
Radical Goodspeed dijo:
Phil's premature aging would have been way up if he had genuine first-kid stress in his life. The man isn't a good liar and if he could handle life's pressures like a normal person he wouldn't be a recluse.

If he had a kid on the way he'd be much closer to looking like Carl than present.
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The simplest answer is usually the correct one. Phil uses everything as an opportunity to beg, and when/if Khet gets pregnant, we're going to have many months of begging to pay for that poor kid's diapers and toys. No way she secretly had a baby and he just didn't mention it, or we didn't hear the kid, because Daddy Phil would be looking for sympathy and money 24/7.
 
Exported from the Kat Speculation thread.

LyteSydeByll dijo:
Kat is home again tonight. So no Jasper action on camera. Better mark the calendar.
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Every Tuesday a free day and she has no time for THE JIM. Has she unplugged herself to save some money, to save Phil's self-esteem or to protect the baby in her oven?

The more I think about it, the more I suspect Phil uses Jasper as a shield (he's his kid) to distract from his phrase "family". If there is a baby on its way, then he literally protects a literal family. This play of words would be very Phil-style. And noooo, he never calls his parents his "family" in this context.

On the other hoof, he calls his smelly cable trap an "office", exaggerations are his bread and butter.
 
A baby would grow to become the ultimate detractor, especially a little boy. The kid would resent video games and his parents, later spilling all the beans, out of spite, on tik tok. A zoomer in the house is Phil's worst nightmare.

Also, I wonder if Kat has ever visited planned parenthood. It would not surprise me if she killed her own baby out of convenience.
 
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Wurstbrot dijo:
Exported from the Kat Speculation thread.


The more I think about it, the more I suspect Phil uses Jasper as a shield (he's his kid) to distract from his phrase "family". If there is a baby on its way, then he literally protects a literal family. This play of words would be very Phil-style. And noooo, he never calls his parents his "family" in this context.
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See that is exactly what I thought. He makes Jasper seem like this incredible burden on him and locking him in his room so he won't go do cat things at night? Jasper waking him up early?

Just can't take his word but I definitely could see using Jasper as a shield. Who the fuck eats dinner at the table with their cat?
 
SkippyLongbottom dijo:
See that is exactly what I thought. He makes Jasper seem like this incredible burden on him and locking him in his room so he won't go do cat things at night? Jasper waking him up early?

Just can't take his word but I definitely could see using Jasper as a shield. Who the fuck eats dinner at the table with their cat?
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This is why I just can't buy there's any way that Phil has a baby scampering around that house.
He couldn't stop himself from bitching about his lack of sleep and certainly the costs involved with a child.
 
Wurstbrot dijo:
The more I think about it, the more I suspect Phil uses Jasper as a shield (he's his kid) to distract from his phrase "family". If there is a baby on its way, then he literally protects a literal family. This play of words would be very Phil-style. And noooo, he never calls his parents his "family" in this context.
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DSP has used the "muh family" line since Leanna moved in with him.
 
We haven't gotten a picture of Kat (even a creepy one behind her back) in over 8 months. Are we going to get a surprise baby reveal in January? #whereskat

Phil would be the kind of guy to only have sex once on his honeymoon, just sayin. And with that pigroach luck, you bet his load would be a bullseye.
 
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