LISTEN &/OR BELIEVE SUPER SECRET GAMERGATE RITUAL - Perform This To Defeat the SJWs

[Feline Darkmage]

Step 1: You must think of an SJW you hate the most, and think solely about them and what they've done to gaming. Feel your righteous anger build up as you start to perform this ritual.

Step 2: Draw or create a pentagram shape and put it on the ground.

Step 3: Fill it with relevant #GamerGate imagery such as: R. Mika slapping her ass, Vivian James fanart, Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball games, Images of the Xenoblade Chronicles censored outfits, pics of the Overwatch Butt Pose, etc. 5 items total, one per pentagram point.

Step 4: Put a candle in the center of the pentagram and light it.

Step 5: Play the song "Fight for the Future" from Street Fighter 3rd Strike

Sing or hum along to it, it will give you energy and focus you so you can complete the ritual.

Result: If you did it correctly than the one SJW you thought of should die shortly and all of their twitter followers will receive a free death and/or rape threat and we will be one step closer to winning!

 

[BILLY MAYS]

i accidentally said randwhale's name three times in front of a mirror what do

 

[Feline Darkmage]

i accidentally said randwhale's name three times in front of a mirror what do

You have summoned her, but not to worry you can kill her with silver bullets or distract her with Meth.

 

[MrTroll]

I thought the super-secret Gamergate ritual was to masturbate to hentai and drink lots of Mtn Dew®.

 

[Womacker]

I thought the super-secret Gamergate ritual was to masturbate to hentai and drink lots of Mtn Dew®.

No that's the nightly prayer.

 

[GS 281]

I thought the super-secret Gamergate ritual was to masturbate to hentai and drink lots of Mtn Dew®.

I combined the two and masturbated to the thought of Chun-Li with a throbbing 9 incher and cried as I came because I realized that the largest an Asian dick can get is 6 inches.

The music is p good for fapping, but this is better

 

[The Lawgiver]

Alternatively, you can use this ritual, it's slightly more effective but should you fail, you'll be trapped in purgatory with a mean old yeti that eternally craves snow cones. Chances are he'll probably eat you too but I have no fuckin clue cause I didn't fuck it up. I learned Wu is immune to any ritual's effects due to the fact they apparently lack a soul.

STEP 1. Draw a star of David in BLUE PAINT on your bathroom floor. this is important, use the EXACT SHADE of blue that's on the Israeli flag or it will have no effect whatsoever.

Step 2: put a name brand snow cone in the middle, make sure it is facing STRAIGHT UP. use supports if necessary. act fast cause it'll melt. generic bargain Store brand will anger the spirit you are about to summon.
Step 3: duct tape a compressed jpeg artifact printout of your target to the snowcone's handle, write YOU NOT EXIST on it with your own blood.
Step 4:

Spoiler: play this song at exactly 0.25 speed at the highest volume possible while doing an interpretive dance, bowing also works but it's less fun.

If you have done this ritual correctly, you should have already come face to face with the wrathful sealed spirit of the Yeti, sealed many millenia ago by the juden, forced to do the will of anyone who summons him. If you anger him he WILL drag you to purgatory in an alternate universe where SJWs have conquered Earth.

 

[Richard Stabone]

My ritual is just harassing and threatening women who play video games.