Shit that you overheard during Thanksgiving (2021)

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biozeminadae1 dijo:
Spain and France helped Americans defeat an enemy that was thousands of miles away from them.
In 1812, they didn't engage you with their full might, and they still burnt down your capitol.
Revolutions usually started with the French revolution, not the American one, and the European idea of nationalism.
Only 1 million died in the Civil war, that's literally nothing for a nation of 32 million people at that time.
Europe never destroyed itself in the First World War and you didn't save it.
America had to give up its Rust belt and form a quasi-Alliance with China to defeat the Soviet Union.

Imagine not knowing history. I guess you have to be American for that.
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Cope, Seeth and bow to your Feudal Lord eurocuck.
 
Stuck working late so no turkey or awkward family stories for me this year, just monitoring an email for tickets and watching Charley Brown specials.
Hope all of you have a nice warm turkey day with friends and family, and hopefully not too many fights about getting the coof shot or not.
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This is a big year for me as I am hosting for the first time ever since my husband and I moved into our first house. I have been making preparations all week. Last night after a full day of prep I realized that with all the thanksgiving fuss I hadn’t made anything for myself to eat that night, and like an angel responding to my prayers my sweet old neighbor showed up with a hot plate of home made egg rolls. What a prince. I practically ate them all still standing at my doorway. Afterwards I cleaned up the kitchen and decided to turn in early so I could get up at 7 to start cooking. While I was brushing my teeth my stomach made a familiar, ominous sound and it was then I knew I had fucked up. You see, I have a food allergy. I’m allergic to onions. They make me vomit violently. I’m not used to having other people cook for me, so I completely forgot that most people use onions in most of their dinner recipes. Before I could even take the toothbrush out of my mouth I cartoonishly projectile vomited directly at the bathroom mirror. I panicked and tried to direct my face to the toilet but unfortunately emptied my guts again before I got there, some landed on my poor cat, who had apparently came in to inspect the situation, this spooked her and she dashed out the door, tripping me in the process and I banged my face up on the counter.
By the time I was finished puking, cleaning, and giving my cat (who probably does not have much to be thankful for on this day) a bath it was about 1am.
This morning my lips and eyelids are swollen, I have a big goose egg on my head, and cat scratches on my forearm.
But god damn it this is going to be the best fucking bird I ever made.
 
Happy Thanksgiving 80%!!! I hope you all have a great dinner, don’t fight too much with your families and come here to drunk post.
:bluelabel::bluelabel::bluelabel:
 
(not) y2k compliant dijo:
Stuck working late so no turkey or awkward family stories for me this year, just monitoring an email for tickets and watching Charley Brown specials.
Hope all of you have a nice warm turkey day with friends and family, and hopefully not too many fights about getting the coof shot or not.
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Handsome devil.

Yes, I will enjoy food and the company of those I care about. Thank you.

Even if that makes me a loon.
 
Last Thanksgiving a relative was in the middle of a psychotic break and spent the day chain smoking on the porch explaining that his mom had signed his life over to NASA when he was born and he could tell that they were monitoring him based on the signal patterns of the wifi router.

This year we are having a quiet Thanksgiving at home. I am making pot roast.
 
RussianParasite dijo:
Not all of us have fucked up families or ones filled with weirdos or people who live their politics.

I’ll start making our traditional family stuffing while others prepare a Turkey in a few minutes. After this is ready we will go over to our neighbors house with a bunch of other people and eat shit tons of food (maybe drink a bit). Probably watch football and play games after a while too.

We’ve done this for years with not even a hint of drama despite a lot of different people from different backgrounds at one party. Never once a fight about politics even if there are disagreements because people around here aren’t thinned skinned bitches who can’t be disagreed with. There will even be liberals and conservatives who *gasp* get along and are even friends!

Enjoy your thanksgiving fellow Burgerland residents!
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All hail the motherland, tovarisch
 
I'm not a Burgerino, but I appreciate any holiday that is heavily centered around solid, comforting, home cooked food - while I don't usually bake sweetstuffs (more of a savory guy), I've got a flakey-style apple pie in the oven and a tub of vanilla ice cream in the freezer for the sake of solidarity. Happy thanksgiving, US-kiwi-frens.
 
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Cheeseburger Picnic dijo:
Last Thanksgiving a relative was in the middle of a psychotic break and spent the day chain smoking on the porch explaining that his mom had signed his life over to NASA when he was born and he could tell that they were monitoring him based on the signal patterns of the wifi router.

This year we are having a quiet Thanksgiving at home. I am making pot roast.
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Pot roast sounds lovely.
 
When it comes to political shit on thanksgiving, my family is mostly right wing, sans me (I don't care about politics besides occasionally commenting on shitshow) and my next oldest brother who my family cut contact with regarding the George Floyd shit.

However I'm just going to watch Planes Trains and Automobiles today and call it a holiday.

oh and watch this as I normally do every year
 
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