Re: dealing with violence without violence.
Someone described to me how Saudi Arabia's criminal system works for Sauds: they bring his family to the cell and officer explains how father is ashamed of him, how mother is ashamed, how siblings don't want to share his name anymore etc. and it fucking works. Perp gets out after a few days and usually doesn't cause problems anymore.
Of course Sauds are filthy rich, non-Sauds are subject to ultraviolence and it's a very shame-based culture, so it can't be really extrapolated to more egalitarian societies and especially modern where pride is celebrated.