random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Return of the Freaker]

Can you still buy six-packs of them if they’re “pets” though?

Oh course, the globohomo is sucking Pooh's prick like it's a 100-acre wood

 

[Army Burger]

they blurred out the body? I can't masturbate to this.

 

[DoshesToDoshes]

Pussy is pussy. The penis has no political compass.

 

[Army Burger]

Little does she know he’s been burning all that cash in some homoerotic Bejeweled clone.

"Mummy, mummy. Why is that person sounding like daddy when she's talking?"

Pictured above: The ever elusive homo retardus in its natural habitat.

This one calls her "dick" huge:

I weep for future alien archaeologists unearthing dragon dildos.

 

[Francesco Dellamorte]

You're posting on a chris chan webforum you can't have that high of standards.

 

[Army Burger]

Ver archivo adjunto 1223841

imagine fucking a troon so hard that the stitches in their neovagina rips and blood and gunk starts flowing out their hole and they die of infection/blood loss and then you just continue fucking them

Wow, this was a very quick escalation from 'gonna shove a buttplug in the wrong hole' to 'gonna ride a fuck machine like a mechanical bull while in fetish cosplay'.

little creamy boob eggs

 

[Hamplanet Fitness]

that would require competence which they lack while video game streaming only requires autism which they have in abundance.

 

[HumanHive]

"There was all manner of pornography thrown up and Nazi swastikas and I was called the N-word repeatedly."

 

[Army Burger]

Personally, I like to intuitively do cocaine. You’d be surprised at just how much of it my body needs.

IDK, but if you have a daughter and her greatest achievement is riding a mechanical dick, I dare say that you have failed as a parent.

"And then...." *literally physically trembles* "...I'm going to talk about Kiwi Farms."

 

[Dwight Schrute]

"People who eat cold pizza are terrorists."

 

[Army Burger]

THERE'S ACTUAL R.ETARDATION CAMPS IN GROWING AROUND HOLY SHIT!

 

[Kideo Hojima]

I am going to get a job, I plan on becoming a stuntman, stuntmen make tons of money and when I'm famous and rich, you'll all regret laughing at me!!!

I don't eat it, that's disgusting, I just enjoy women taking a dump or having sex with a woman when she's about to. Again, I don't see what the big deal of it is, some people get aroused by peeing.

It's people like you that cause suicides, ya know. People...who can be as depressed and anxious as Will. He tells me everything...which may not be such a good thing, but unlike you people, I care about him and want to help. So good day!

Edit to avoid double-posting:

I don't even completely have autism. I mean, I used to when I was like...8. But...I think I've been cured from it from years of therapy. But William is actually a nice, considerate, and intelligent man. You just have to get to know him and stop talking shit about him. I get it. He's weird. He obsesses over trains. He's kinda slightly homophobic and demon-phobic. But he's really cool once you get to know him. You people just need to give him a chance. That is all.

He's scared you'll beat him up or kill him, or rape him, or rob him, or kidnap him! So I advise you lay off Will or I'll find a way to report this trashy shit site to the authorities.

 

[Army Burger]

I don't even completely have autism. I mean, I used to when I was like...8. But...I think I've been cured from it from years of therapy. But William is actually a nice, considerate, and intelligent man. You just have to get to know him and stop talking shit about him. I get it. He's weird. He obsesses over trains. He's kinda slightly homophobic and demon-phobic. But he's really cool once you get to know him. You people just need to give him a chance. That is all.

 

[TV's Adam West]

Do you by default view women rapeable until proven otherwise?

I bet a fellow could make a politically incorrect joke about this if he was so inclined.

Again, I did not give you permission to expose any of this.

I feel like 'toddler sex doll grifter' should've been first and foremost in the tagline.

I just enjoy women taking a dump or having sex with a woman when she's about to.

Has nothing to do with politics. Pussy is pussy. The penis has no political compass.

 

[GreatGrandGeneralAutismo]

中国是屁眼

 

[Army Burger]

"Ok, officer, I know what you're thinking, but all of those pictures and videos on my computer of children were meant to be cute! I know I've openly admitted to being a pedophile, but that doesn't mean that I like EVERY child, just certain children, so that makes all of this ok. Wait, why are you arresting me???"

i dont even know whats happening anymore besides some jesus freak suffering from terminal autism

I was debating on whether or not to post it and then she went and called us cocksuckers

Sorry but if a dog dick is what turns you on then you're already on that slope to being said dogfucker.

Watching these two fat moo moo's slap their udders together in fits of rage while spilling the most sweetest of tard cum over the internet is glorious.

> i am featured online as a fruitcake, to my detriment

 

[CatParty]

 

[TV's Adam West]

Because Troy Rangi dares you to pee your pants for real.

Just because your idea of fun is being a bitter humorless cunt doesn't mean the rest of us cant enjoy ourselves.

Because you're a group of crazy conspiracy theorists and racists who should be lined up and shot to death.

 

[Kideo Hojima]

Asian people terrify me and I don't like people comparing them to me, even Chinese music scares me. Each time my parents took me to that restaurant near my house I would cry begging them to take me home because the music was really creepy.

I'm not making anything up, my nightmare is what makes me scared of Asian, they're all scary, carrying around weapons, knowing martial arts, their music, it's all terrifying!!! It maakes me want to kill myself!!

 

[Jack Awful]

"YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, MOM AND DAD, ONLY KIWIFARMS DICTATES MY BEHAVIOR!!!"