Random Tumblr posts

[CephalopodEnthusiast]

Spoiler: Futurama headcanons

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Who wastes their time making headcanons about Futurama, of all things?

 

[Meowthkip]

Who wastes their time making headcanons about Futurama, of all things?

The saddest of nerds.

Also this person reminds me of Vade.

 

[Piga Dgrifm]

Spoiler: Futurama headcanons

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Zoidberg part is accurate tbh.

 

[CephalopodEnthusiast]

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

This is meant to be 100% serious. This is not a parody or a joke. Fucking hell.

 

[CephalopodEnthusiast]

The saddest of nerds.

Also this person reminds me of Vade.

Whenever I see idiots on tumblr causing drama nowdays, they remind me of Vade. It's like a curse.

Spoiler

It's good to be back on the farms. I missed you guys.

This is meant to be 100% serious. This is not a parody or a joke. Fucking hell.
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I've seen this before. The original post criticized people who wear their identity like a badge.

Sjws edited the post to fit their bullshit narrative. Because being transgender = not getting surgery or experiencing dysphoria, apparently. Even though most people who fall under that category would be ashamed to associate with people like "Skye".

https://cutie3pnt14159.tumblr.com/post/171851543212/howprolifeofyou-cishetsbeingcishet

And of course Labelle would like it. What a moron.

 

[_Wice]

OP:https://yourfatfeministfriend.tumbl...ated-dating-requirementsmust-meet-at-least-80

Spoiler: Long, but hilarious

Updated Dating Requirements

Must meet at least 80% of given criteria for me to consider dating you

You cannot be a neo-Nazi, alt-right, white supremacist, Trump supporter, KKK member, anti-Islam, or anti-BLM

You must acknowledge your privilege

You must have friends that are LGBTQIA, black, Asian, Muslim, disabled, fat , or Latinx.

You have to be an intersectional feminist

You must be an ally to all marginalized groups

You cannot speak over me or gaslight me

No sexism allowed

You must be an ally to the fat acceptance movement and work in eliminating fatphobia

You cannot in any way suggest I change my looks or lose weight

You are only allowed to look at sexy pictures of me, and only me

You must report to me weekly about your internet searches so I can make sure you’re not cheating on me

If you use incognito on any device, for any reason, I will dump you

You must take me out to dinner once a week to show you care for me.

Activism is my job, so you will have to help pay for my funds. You must respect this and as such, pay for me when necessary

You are not allowed to call me babe or honey. It’s creepy and rude.

You must be okay with having sex at least five times a week. I’m sex positive and I should not be shamed for my sexuality.

You have to keep up with certain tv shows that I like

You must be a Star Wars and Harry Potter fan

You can have any body type. You can’t control how thin or fat you are, so I won’t judge you for it

You must be open to certain kinks in the bedroom. It’s okay to not like them.

You must massage me three times a week

You must have a job. No pay requirements

You have to drive me to protests and help me make signs and fliers

You must be politically active and be a democrat

You must be politically correct at all times

Absolutely no microagressions

No ableism

No racism

You are not allowed to question how much or what I eat.

You must acknowledge that health is a social construct

You must practice basic hygiene at all times

You must be okay with what I choose to do with my body. My body, my choice

You must have interests in diverse or less problematic media

You cannot be a fan of problematic people

You must like Beyoncé

You cannot question how I spend money

You are not allowed to play problematic video games such as GTA

You must love me no matter what I do with my life

Obvious controlling, manipulative behavior in a relationship from a typical SJW. Good thing no one will date this person for sure.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

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"you cannot in any way suggest I change my looks or lose weight."
If your partner doesn't tell you that you're unhealthy or that they're worried about you having dangerous habits, then they don't love you.

 

[Evilboshe]

Being gay means you can't like or know about cars:

It's annoying when people shove their gayness into totally unrelated subjects

 

[Meowthkip]

Being gay means you can't like or know about cars:
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It's annoying when people shove their gayness into totally unrelated subjects

Gays are like women, they don't know shit about cars, AMIRITE, GUYS?

 

[Piga Dgrifm]

Being gay means you can't like or know about cars:
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It's annoying when people shove their gayness into totally unrelated subjects

It's current year, gay people only know about being gay. Stop acting like they're people and not walking stereotypes.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

Being gay means you can't like or know about cars:
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It's annoying when people shove their gayness into totally unrelated subjects

I've got one. Since Tumblr wants to play this game.

Being gay and gay culture is killing people and eating them while keeping mutilated bodies in the home.
#gaycultureismurder, sorry I don't make the rules uwu. (◕‿◕✿)

 

[Maiden]

Being gay means you can't like or know about cars:
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It's annoying when people shove their gayness into totally unrelated subjects

This post is absolutely hilarious to me because the biggest car nerd I know (seriously, has a new car every time I see him and 90% of what he says about cars flies RIGHT over my head), is also one of the /gayest/ people I know, down to the speech stereotypes and whatnot. But, ok Tumblr.

 

[Synthesizer Patel]

No, you can either like cars or cock, that's the rule.

This is meant to be 100% serious. This is not a parody or a joke. Fucking hell.
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I know this post (and the accompanying salt) has been posted around a few times before, but I only just noticed that, in their edit, they called Skye a "trans boy". Even though "Damien is a trans man" is right there. I know people here point out that the genderclowns prefer to call themselves "boys" rather than "men" all the time, but... that image shows an impressive lack of self-awareness.

Unless this is their way of confirming that "trans boy" is code for "a girl playing dress up", with "trans man" being the actual term.

 

[WellManicuredMan]

 

[Meowthkip]

Oh no, people don’t care what you look like.

How horrible.

 

[WellManicuredMan]

Oh no, people don’t care what you look like.

How horrible.

Bonus info: "Becoming Jennifer" is in her late 40s.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

@WellManicuredMan I'm pretty sure this bitch is 40.

Well. I wonder why nobody cared about seeing Becoming-Jennifer's picture. It's such a mystery.

 

[Tlazolli]

Bonus info: "Becoming Jennifer" is in her late 40s.

Bitch look hideous so it’s no surprise no one wants to compliment her

 

[Donovan the Man]

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@WellManicuredMan I'm pretty sure this bitch is 40.

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Well. I wonder why nobody cared about seeing Becoming-Jennifer's picture. It's such a mystery.

I have never seen this hatred of gay people from trannies before marriage equality was passed in the US. Now that gays are mainstream trannies want to take over the LGBT community and let the kinksters, asexuals, and otherkin come in to replace those dang dirty cis gays.