Personal Lolcows: Tumblr Edition - A website like Tumblr tends to breed exceptional individuals

[Lorde Doesn't Yiff]

My personal tumblr lolcow is someone I have to frequently interact with irl, actually.

He claims to have DID, anxiety, depression, tinnitus, bipolar disorder, PTSD, OCD (which he started claiming a week after I started to seek therapy for mine), ADHD, bulimia, anorexia (yes, both of those), sensory processing disorder, and gender dysphoria. He also claims to be bisexual (although that one might be true). Every single week his childhood trauma gets worse. I wouldn't be surprised if by next year he started claiming that he was literally shot and killed in 'Nam.

Also, he used his fake DID to cheat on his girlfriend, y'know, as you do, and got super pissed when I told her about it. Started threatening suicide and shit and would come to class "trying to hide" self harm cuts that actually weren't even there. He claimed that he would frequently harm himself by pricking his skin with a thumbtack and if he did it enough in the right places on his arm his heart would stop.

One more thing: his tumblr is like what you'd expect from a 12 year old whose mommy just let him use the internet for the first time when, in fact, he is a grown man.

Probably your typical, run-of-the-mill edgy attention seeker, but I have to see him all the time, so it got old real fast.

 

[Crunchy Leaf]

My personal tumblr lolcow is someone I have to frequently interact with irl, actually.

He claims to have DID, anxiety, depression, tinnitus, bipolar disorder, PTSD, OCD (which he started claiming a week after I started to seek therapy for mine), ADHD, bulimia, anorexia (yes, both of those), sensory processing disorder, and gender dysphoria. He also claims to be bisexual (although that one might be true). Every single week his childhood trauma gets worse. I wouldn't be surprised if by next year he started claiming that he was literally shot and killed in 'Nam.

Also, he used his fake DID to cheat on his girlfriend, y'know, as you do, and got super pissed when I told her about it. Started threatening suicide and shit and would come to class "trying to hide" self harm cuts that actually weren't even there. He claimed that he would frequently harm himself by pricking his skin with a thumbtack and if he did it enough in the right places on his arm his heart would stop.

One more thing: his tumblr is like what you'd expect from a 12 year old whose mommy just let him use the internet for the first time when, in fact, he is a grown man.

Probably your typical, run-of-the-mill edgy attention seeker, but I have to see him all the time, so it got old real fast.

i'm never going to complain again about the irl person I know on tumblr who posts untagged Reylo because...wow

 

[Crunchy Leaf]

My 30 year old, “queer”, heterosexually married cow is talking about wanting to have a baby and I wonder if she’s going to stay involved with fetlife and her “kink community” while raising the child.

Of course the decision to have a baby is announced in the same post thats lamenting the website’s death because she found “so many lovers” through kink blogs.

She also credits Steven Universe with her decision to reproduce because it showed such a “positive” portrayal of lesbians raising children.

We don't have a Fetlife thread, do we? The amount of m.ilk there is phenomenal.

 

[cocksmash25]

He claims to have DID, anxiety, depression, tinnitus, bipolar disorder, PTSD, OCD (which he started claiming a week after I started to seek therapy for mine), ADHD, bulimia, anorexia (yes, both of those), sensory processing disorder, and gender dysphoria.

I know that tinnitus can be really bad when it’s chronic but for some reason it’s really funny to see it listed with other typical tumblr mental illnesses. It’s like someone saying “I have bpd, ptsd, did, and exploding head syndrome”

 

[Lupin The Turd]

Joulejay
Filipino American Troon who infamously REEEEE'd at an artist, Gomigomipomi for drawing Marina from Splatoon not black enough. She got promptly blown the fuck out and was informed by Gomi on how light affects colors, whereas Jay was merely using the color picker to determine what Marina's tone should be. After the fact she got heavy backlash and used this as a means of playing the victim, demanding that Gomi apologize to her for letting her be "bullied". She also did this to Matt of Super Best Friends fame when he and Woolie had a laugh over the discourse on their podcast.
5 months later she still spergs out over Marina's tone, even recoloring official Splatfest art to make Marina darker. I'll admit that the splatfest art does make her considerably lighter than the ingame model, but it's a non issue given how more players will see Marina through the game anyways.
Feel free to dive in and find more.

 

[GayDemiBoy]

Joulejay
Filipino American Troon who infamously REEEEE'd at an artist, Gomigomipomi for drawing Marina from Splatoon not black enough. She got promptly blown the fuck out and was informed by Gomi on how light affects colors, whereas Jay was merely using the color picker to determine what Marina's tone should be. After the fact she got heavy backlash and used this as a means of playing the victim, demanding that Gomi apologize to her for letting her be "bullied". She also did this to Matt of Super Best Friends fame when he and Woolie had a laugh over the discourse on their podcast.
5 months later she still spergs out over Marina's tone, even recoloring official Splatfest art to make Marina darker. I'll admit that the splatfest art does make her considerably lighter than the ingame model, but it's a non issue given how more players will see Marina through the game anyways.
Feel free to dive in and find more.

Oh this girl is pretty well disliked by most people who draw any sort art of Marina because they will edit the pictures to make Marina darker. She still has no understanding that lighting will make a character appear slightly different and sometimes the hues need to be altered slightly to keep the mood of a piece. They usually get btfo by everyone on tumblr and jut have a hugbox of tumblrites around them.

 

[Meowthkip]

Oh this girl is pretty well disliked by most people who draw any sort art of Marina because they will edit the pictures to make Marina darker. She still has no understanding that lighting will make a character appear slightly different and sometimes the hues need to be altered slightly to keep the mood of a piece. They usually get btfo by everyone on tumblr and jut have a hugbox of tumblrites around them.

Is she white?

 

[GayDemiBoy]

Is she white?

Knowing this is tumblr, more than likely

 

[fishercat]

Is she white?

She claims not to be.

 

[Kaabi]

Joulejay
Filipino American Troon who infamously REEEEE'd at an artist, Gomigomipomi for drawing Marina from Splatoon not black enough. She got promptly blown the fuck out and was informed by Gomi on how light affects colors, whereas Jay was merely using the color picker to determine what Marina's tone should be. After the fact she got heavy backlash and used this as a means of playing the victim, demanding that Gomi apologize to her for letting her be "bullied". She also did this to Matt of Super Best Friends fame when he and Woolie had a laugh over the discourse on their podcast.
5 months later she still spergs out over Marina's tone, even recoloring official Splatfest art to make Marina darker. I'll admit that the splatfest art does make her considerably lighter than the ingame model, but it's a non issue given how more players will see Marina through the game anyways.
Feel free to dive in and find more.

I love how these people don't understand lighting. Every time i see someone throwing a fit over Marina's skin tone, they 99% of the time never get it right when they try to edit it themselves, and never take in account the background or lighting surrounding the character. The Splatfest art sometimes has them in a pastel-ish like color at times. But even if she isn't dark, you can still tell she's dark-skinned. Browsing Joule's Splatoon tag, you can find a few tumblr accounts that are doing the same thing like Joule. I found one user who may be a friend of theirs since they interacted with each other named Seased who does the same edits but rants about it in the tags. Links below are from their Splatoon blog.

https://seasplat.tumblr.com/post/181079231607/theres-a-new-concert-wouldnt-it-be-fun-to-get-1#notes
http://archive.is/4syWs

And the tags

https://seasplat.tumblr.com/post/181000610797/hm-i-tried-doing-some-of-these
http://archive.fo/CzFeZ

Image since Archive is messed up and doesn't show it. The images on the left is their edit. This edit seems way too dark on Marina.

Spoiler: Picture of the character for reference.

I'm getting second-hand embarrassment reading the tags.

 

[gaping yiffer]

Radfem who has had several tumblr accounts in the past two years, I found her so entertaining I had to keep laughing at each new account she created, all some new cringe theme. When I found her first blog, she would post pictures of her holding bottles of alcohol and in tutus doing bad quality clown makeup. Always posted pictures of her in hospital and made a vague post about how she chugged cough syrup and saw God. Maybe she was a bit too young to really make fun of, only 15/16 when she made her first account but she went to my highschool, never really spoke to her but a lot of rumors when around that she was basically the worst piece of shit you can think of and falsely accused many men of rape. Back to the tumblr cringe, on her first account she would post about fucking men twice the age of her Dad for bottles of alcohol and was obsessed with glorifying every aspect of her mental illness.

Second account. Self proclaimed demiboy otherkin who ID's with characters like Harley Quinn and whined about wanting to find her 'true puddin'. Account was littered with ass pics and self harm scars, (more of a sadcow at this point). Started smoking a lot of weed, just drugs in general I suppose. Posted pictures with cigarettes and acid and then complained about her health issues non-stop and how she wants her parents to die because they took her bong.

Third/current account, this is where the "radfem" comes in. Currently she's dropped out of school and lives in a studio apartment with her meth dealer boyfriend, and of course, does meth. Last time I saw her she was walking down the main street of town wearing a Rick and Morty t-shirt. She has over 15 long winded paragraphs about how she wants men to die and she thinks that deep down they're all fundamentally blood hungry rapists who feed on the innocence of angelic women.

 

[Valstrax]

Welp, time to talk about my personal experience with a lolcow.

It all started a few months ago, before the End of Tumblvangelion as I like to call it. I was basically scrolling through my dashboard as per usual when I noticed a post by someone I had followed earlier. Let's call her 'Aka', now 'ol Aka is basically one of those people who ship themselves with fictional characters (in her case, it's Guzma from Pokemon) to the point where she centered her entire profile around self-shipping. As much as I may be called a hypocrite for saying this, but I don't really support self-shipping.

Now, this specific post? Woah boy. It was a doozy. Basically, our friend Aka was ranting about how men ruin everything while wymen are the ones who get constantly abused and stuff, being the kind of guy that wasn't brainwashed by Tunglr propaganda, I decided to step in with my 2 cents. And Aka was fucking pissed, she kept rambling on and on about how men deserve to be raped and shit. I even called her a radfem (I wasn't a Kiwi Farmer at the time, mind you) and from that point onward she blocked me.

So the moral of the story? Some people are dickheads and have their head up their ass.

 

[Meowthkip]

now 'ol Aka is basically one of those people who ship themselves with fictional characters (in her case, it's Guzma from Pokemon) to the point where she centered her entire profile around self-shipping.

Guzma shows up in Pokemon Sun and Moon while she's playing and he says "It's ya boy, Guzma!"

She strokes the top tough screen with her index finger. "Yes," she whispers. "My boy."

 

[Valstrax]

Guzma shows up in Pokemon Sun and Moon while she's playing and he says "It's ya boy, Guzma!"

She strokes the top tough screen with her index finger. "Yes," she whispers. "My boy."

Foolish. Everyone knows that Lysandre is the best villain.

 

[Ass Kinoshitter]

Mine is http://dickcruncher.tumblr.com/ (Archive) and I found her through drama she was having with Rae Lovedrool. She is incredibly exceptional to say the least. She also has a callout for anyone curious (Archive).

EDIT: Archived!

 

[yasscat]

Mine is http://dickcruncher.tumblr.com/ and I found her through drama she was having with Rae Lovedrool. She is incredibly exceptional to say the least. She also has a callout for anyone curious.

archive ya shit

 

[A Sign]

Take a shot every time you read "literally"

You will die of ether alcohol poisoning, diabetic shock, or drown from too much water

 

[Valstrax]

Take a shot every time you read "literally"

You will die of ether alcohol poisoning, diabetic shock, or drown from too much water

Sorry chief, I've already gotten 32 pints of alcohol down after looking through the Danganronpa tag and seeing every piece of fanart by 'tenkolesbian'. Can we get a thread for him/her/them? I mean, they have quite the potential to be an Tumblr artcow if I say so myself.

 

[_Wice]

A cow mentioned earlier on this thread JouleJay is going funnyman who was recently outed as a creep now. This includes trying to get him sued by a big company for selling merchandise that has a face from one of the company’s products on it. Nothing has come out of it so far but I’m expecting some laughs. The funnyman’s a cow himself which comes naturally considering it’s a funnyman.

 

[Literally Whojak?]

A cow mentioned earlier on this thread JouleJay is going funnyman who was recently outed as a creep now. This includes trying to get him sued by a big company for selling merchandise that has a face from one of the company’s products on it. Nothing has come out of it so far but I’m expecting some laughs. The funnyman’s a cow himself which comes naturally considering it’s a funnyman.

are you talking about the Gaud shitshow?