💤 Inactive Nick Bate / Nickalaus B. Stoutzenberger (Thread 1)

[Yawning Bulbasaur]

Wife once yelled at me for not reading. Maybe noo that I'm reading she'll stop hating that specific part of me. One doon, ??? to go!

Me and Wife should get married the same day Rya and Craig got married. Different year though, obviously. Unless we go back in time.

At some point I need to convert Wife back to Christianity. It would be horrible if she went to Hell. Can't alloo that to happen, yo.

Good luck with all of that

Also, my prediction of Nick in the near future
http://www.watchcartoononline.com/king-of-the-hill-season-3-episode-9-pretty-pretty-dresses

Spoiler

Joyce: Got dangit Nick, how many times have I told you about cleaning up after your I-Jew-ana? And take that dress off, you know cross-dressing is against God's plan.
Nick (in a creepy pseudo-Canadian falsetto): Why do you keep calling me Nick? Don't you recognize me? My name is Anna!!!
Joyce: BWAAAAAHHHH!!!!! H'wat the hell is going on here????
Nick: I've come back for Nick, because I've thought all aboot what a great husband he is, and I reeaaaallly missed him!!!!

 

[Dollars2010]

Yech as usual.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Ever try holding your poo until you died of intestinal blockage? It'd be funny if Nick did.

 

[drtoboggan]

Ever try holding your poo until you died of intestinal blockage? It'd be funny if Nick did.

It's not A-Logging if it's said about Sick Nick...and it's pretty damned amusing.
Anyone else notice his latest batch of posts have a sprinkling of inner city wannabe? The fake accent is bad enough, but combined with "yo" and "dat," it's even more cringeworthy

 

[Duke Nukem]

It's been a while since I stopped in to read this thread. Apart from the pooping tweets again, does Nick have any substantial source of income?

 

[Ti-99/4A]

Just a

 

[Yawning Bulbasaur]

It's been a while since I stopped in to read this thread. Apart from the pooping tweets again, does Nick have any substantial source of income?

He lives by himself in an apartment paid for by his aunt, and I believe he gets social security checks with his aunt as his representative payee

 

[MLW RS 18]

He lives by himself in an apartment paid for by his aunt, and I believe he gets social security checks with his aunt as his representative payee

In short, a disgusting, mentally ill basement-dwelling pervert who leeches off his relatives and is ungrateful about it, judging by his violent fantasies towards his aunt especially...

 

[Duke Nukem]

He lives by himself in an apartment paid for by his aunt, and I believe he gets social security checks with his aunt as his representative payee

Thanks, Pony bro. I didn't think he had a normal, regular job at the moment. I think it was mentioned that he did a few shifts at a family owned thrift store at one point, though?

But yeah, I don't come here much. Jesus, he's just so horrible and gross. And to think I have family that lives in the same state.

In short, a disgusting, mentally ill basement-dwelling pervert who leeches off his relatives and is ungrateful about it, judging by his violent fantasies towards his aunt especially...

He's probably resentful about leeching off of others. I think Jace is in a similar situation? Not to drive the thread off-topic, but lolcows without jobs (most of them) who get a tugboat of some sort often seem to have that attitude.

Of course, in the case of Master Bate, I think being a jobless welfare leech is the least of his problems.

 

[Coldgrip]

Considering how he thinks being a dropout is something to be proud of I'd think he'd view collecting welfare as some sort of accomplishment. His ungratefulness seems to stem from others keeping a (very) loose leash on him and the fact that Anna won't reciprocate his feelings.

 

[Yawning Bulbasaur]

T minus two days till The Nick 23rd Birthday Extravaganza with Special Live Guest Appearance By the Nick's Wife

Also don't miss the Special Live Guest Appearance by Aerosmith

 

[libertyoftheaether]

T minus two days till The Nick 23rd Birthday Extravaganza with Special Live Guest Appearance By the Nick's Wife

I really, really, really don't like the sound of this statement.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Ok, I had to take a break from Nick Bate because I just can't. A year of reading his tweets broke me and I just couldn't do it anymore especially because it just made me dead on the inside to see someone as pathetic and reprehensible at Nick. I'm the ween who got his psych eval off him. An interesting side note: whenever I visited the old man after the divorce and remarry, I would be overwhelmed with the smell of shit. For the first two days, I would be gagging and generally not feeling well and I'd get used to it. I used to think it was the cow farm next door, but now I realize it was because he lives about 20 minutes from the Nick.

RE Autism: The philosopher Leo Strauss created a logical fallacy called "reductio ad hitlerum" which is when someone equates a certain behavior to that of the Nazis (the nazis wear pants, you wear pants, ergo you're a nazi!!i1!11!1). I think many in this forum engage in "reducio ad autismum" in which any lolcow gets the "AUTISM" stamp when there's all sorts of lulzy disorders out there that produce lolcows. It's the same with Jace, who is mentally ill. Nick's not mentally ill--he's fucked in the head. Very fucked. I think the schizotypal diagnosis makes sense in some context, but there are other issues along with it. I think there are parts of his upbringing where he either got bad touched larry'd, locked in a basement for days, or spent some quality time with his own personal pastor faggot to pray the pedophilia away. I think he plays dumb to make himself look innocent so people don't realize how sick he is.

RE Religion: The more I think of it, I think Nick's ascribes to a Calvinist religion. These are the people who believe that God determines whether you're saved or going to hell from the moment you're born. He's mentioned many times about destiny and fate and it also explains how he can be religious and yet wish that he lived in Sodom and Gomorrah. He thinks he can violate every single commandment in the bible, because God already decided that he was going to heaven. He probably extended it to God deciding Anna was his wife and thus he is actually incapable of marrying anyone else other than her.

It's been a while since I stopped in to read this thread. Apart from the pooping tweets again, does Nick have any substantial source of income?

I don't know if he was paid for it, but he used to "work" at his B-mum's antique store but it went out of business earlier this year. Three guesses as to why they struggled to get customers?

 

[Duke Nukem]

I really, really, really don't like the sound of this statement.

I got new intel regarding his wife:

Spoiler

I don't know if he was paid for it, but he used to "work" at his B-mum's antique store but it went out of business earlier this year. Three guesses as to why they struggled to get customers?

-Poor selection of goods?
-Nick Bate smelling like a field of cow patties? Or creeping on the customers' daughters?
-Oh God, it's gotta be Nick Bate, doesn't it?

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Yup I remember him tweeting about some 9 year olds at the store.

 

[Yawning Bulbasaur]

RE Religion: The more I think of it, I think Nick's ascribes to a Calvinist religion. These are the people who believe that God determines whether you're saved or going to hell from the moment you're born. He's mentioned many times about destiny and fate and it also explains how he can be religious and yet wish that he lived in Sodom and Gomorrah. He thinks he can violate every single commandment in the bible, because God already decided that he was going to heaven. He probably extended it to God deciding Anna was his wife and thus he is actually incapable of marrying anyone else other than her.

I thought his family consisted of evangelical/fundamentalist Protestants at first, but now I've kind of been thinking that his family probably is Calvinist considering they live in one of the heavily Amish parts of rural Pennsylvania on top of having an über-German last name.

 

[TaterBot]

... Nick's not mentally ill--he's fucked in the head. Very fucked. I think the schizotypal diagnosis makes sense in some context, but there are other issues along with it. I think there are parts of his upbringing where he either got bad touched larry'd, locked in a basement for days, or spent some quality time with his own personal pastor faggot to pray the pedophilia away. I think he plays dumb to make himself look innocent so people don't realize how sick he is.

I added the emphasis bc that's my thought exactly. He likes making ppl feel off-balance, disturbed, and uneasy. Anna, his neighbors in the building, and his creepy pedo behavior toward the little girls in his mother's shop are examples of that.

 

[deadson]

Holy god I somehow managed to read the whole thing without vomiting. I am not without regrets, tho. I think I shall put this individual out of my mind for awhile. D:

 

[Ancani]

Sorry for my absence--I was out of town, having fun at a convention and generally hiding from the real world.

I was thinking about all this last night, and I came to a conclusion of sorts. There are three main aspects to Nick's behavior: shit he makes up to sound edgy or weird, shit he exaggerates but that has a grain of truth, and shit that he's completely serious about. The tricky part is figuring out which is which.

I personally think it's a pretty even distribution. For instance, a lot of his uber-stupid thoughts are probably made up. A lot of his creepier thoughts are probably legit but exaggerated. And finally, I think his thoughts about me and pedophilia and fetishism and such are--at the very least--primarily serious.

Also, that thing about his birthday is disgusting, but since his bday was yesterday (I have no clue how I remember this) and nothing happened, I guess all is safe? :/

 

[DrChristianTroy]

Sorry for my absence--I was out of town, having fun at a convention and generally hiding from the real world.

I was thinking about all this last night, and I came to a conclusion of sorts. There are three main aspects to Nick's behavior: shit he makes up to sound edgy or weird, shit he exaggerates but that has a grain of truth, and shit that he's completely serious about. The tricky part is figuring out which is which.

I personally think it's a pretty even distribution. For instance, a lot of his uber-stupid thoughts are probably made up. A lot of his creepier thoughts are probably legit but exaggerated. And finally, I think his thoughts about me and pedophilia and fetishism and such are--at the very least--primarily serious.

Also, that thing about his birthday is disgusting, but since his bday was yesterday (I have no clue how I remember this) and nothing happened, I guess all is safe? :/

Hooray you weren't kidnapped!