💀 Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

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Is he gonna act like he wouldn't be doing push ups like a girl if his feet weren't in casts? I'm not sure I buy it. Which is especially funny after his complaining about soldiers on veterans day.
 
klickitat dijo:
This one is just...I mean, yeah, ok, good for him not laying around like a Hutt I guess, but I doubt he'll stick with it.

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I sure hope all the zoomer bae's in his insta are asking him WTF the Goonies are. Get with the times, man, the new "fat kid" character everyone knows is Goldberg from The Mighty Ducks.
 
GleamingTheQ-Bert dijo:
Watch out everybody, Lucas has been working out:
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(Of course, he fails to understand that it's not about doing 100 crunches once, and being so sore tomorrow that he'll never do crunches again, it's about doing a reasonable amount of exercise on a regular basis. He could have done a thousand crunches today, wouldn't have given him abs!)
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klickitat dijo:
This one is just...I mean, yeah, ok, good for him not laying around like a Hutt I guess, but I doubt he'll stick with it.

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Does the Freak think if he exercises/drops some weight the Gen Z baes are going to want to date him. He has burned himself to a crisp nothing he'll ever do will bring in the baes.
 
Okay, I don't care about fashion sense in the slightest (I'm not Christian either obv) but a guy who went to college to pick up girls in batman pajama pants telling anyone off about fashion sense might as well be Chris Chan doing it while in Unicorn cosplay.
lucas2.png
 
HullDown dijo:
I will never stop loving the wordfilter.
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Honestly I wasn’t even aware that there was a word filter so I had to read twice to make sure that I wasn’t missing out on kiwi-slang and I still don’t understand it but it’s funny lol.

mothman96 dijo:
Does the Freak think if he exercises/drops some weight the Gen Z baes are going to want to date him. He has burned himself to a crisp nothing he'll ever do will bring in the baes.
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I think that the working out is a one time thing. Like mentioned before he’s going to be hurting tomorrow if he actually did 100 crunches without any prior warmup or lack of muscle memory.
Besides that, he’s plenty good as is, right?!
 
klickitat dijo:
This one is just...I mean, yeah, ok, good for him not laying around like a Hutt I guess, but I doubt he'll stick with it.

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What is a "half push up"? Like, a girl push up? Like on your knees instead of your toes?

Edit: and how does Walter dress like it's 1980? When Lucas has likely only seen his head in his response videos? If Walter dresses like 1980, I guess Lucas is like, what, cyberpunk douchebag?

Oh of course, I know, Derelict by Mugatu!
 
klickitat dijo:
We also already knew he's broke this month and probably legit didn't have any money; he gets about $30 after Mallon Place takes its cut and he pays his phone bill (allegedly) and he already blew that on mediocre restaurant food the day he got it and was begging for money for more food.

Seems like the delivery guy is the one who got screwed on this one.



So you potentially set up some random person, and a woman at that, to be confronted at her own house by an angry mentally ill hobo and you want...praise for this?

Dude.

No.

Get in the pen with the rest of the cows.
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This is the only appropriate response to this shit.

What the fuck. Didn’t get enough attention for your screenshots of your girlfriend you posted for no fucking reason that you needed to order some more attention? Next time, get your edgy cool friends of 2018 to tell you how cool you are instead of this lame attempt.

You screwed a delivery driver out of his tip. You risked sending lucas to the home of a single woman. How is that okay? What if he had been pissed and angered and then lashed out at her, or some random teen on an evening run.

Your attempt was super lame and wouldn’t have gotten much even if successful. Like, what was the end game goal? To prove that Lucas would go to a home of teens and a party? We know that.

There are reasons to not catfish Lucas. The only times catfish don’t get this reaction that you are getting and deserve is when the cat fishing doesn’t endanger the public AND gets good info, like that Lucas would want to date a 15yr old or have a teen cut off her finger for him. Or gets Lucas to admit he doesn’t need money and can get a job but is just too lazy.

You didn’t do anything special but cloutchase. Join the autistic owls and goldaur in the fucking lolcow pen and stop double posting.
 
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Fatal Walter dijo:
Okay, I don't care about fashion sense in the slightest (I'm not Christian either obv) but a guy who went to college to pick up girls in batman pajama pants telling anyone off about fashion sense might as well be Chris Chan doing it while in Unicorn cosplay.
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Wally.

Does he think that's an insult or something?

I kinda want to unblock him to see if he throws his entire mass back at leaving comments again.
 
Things the Spokane Pedo doesn't understand, like his mouth just like his ass spews shit.



ETA:
Will it ever dawn on him christians don't give a shit about the ravings of an insane Freak.

 
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klickitat dijo:
What's he gonna do? Throw 12 acres of land at someone who pisses him off?
Go be homeless there because he isn't housebroken?
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....in the ancient traditions of the germanic feudal lords he proudly claims to be descended from, his parents will skip over him for being a sped and make his brother seth the lord of the stately werner manor. But not to worry, lucas will not be forgotten entirely......he'll take up the role of a feudal serf working the land for free and making his living off of it so he doesn't have to work an actual paying job

......and just like many of his feudal ancestors he'll fail to grow shit and starve to death in a few months. In the meantime he'll spend his time living in the woods on the manor subsisting off of fallen acorns and carrion until winter hits, eliminating what few sources of food he has. I can just imagine the kind of pottage lucas would come up with. it would be horrific even by medieval standards
 
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