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Jaron Seth Bloshinsky / Jazz Jennings / I Am Jazz - Puberty Blockers: Not Even Once
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Come in, and pull yourself up a chair (Like Chairry)
Let the fun begin, it's time to let down your hair
Sander's sure excited (Uh-huh)
'Cause all his friends have been invited (That's you!)
To go wacky at Sander's Playhouse
(Arrrrrr!)
There's a crazy rhythm comin' from the SPLC (What's that?)
Griffin, Ari, and Jazz are the Puppet Band (Yeah!)
He got a couple of talkin' fish
And a genie who'll grant a wish
Golly it's cuckoo at Sander's Playhouse
Jeanette's spinnin', Mr. Greg's grinnin'
'Cause Jess Craven's flyin' by (Hello!)
The flowers are singin', the cellphone is ringin'
And the Soros Family goes "Hi!"
Aunt Debbie's soarin', Peppermint's still a-snorin'
There's a flashing Magic Screen (Ha ha)
Jacky is so classy, Jack is kinda sassy
A nuttier establishment you've never seen
Spend a day with Sander and you'll see what we mean
(Come on!)
Get outta bed, there'll be no more nappin' (Wake up)
'Cause you've landed in a place where anything can happen
Now we've given you fair warnin'
It's gonna be that kind of mornin'
For being wacky (Ha ha ha)
For getting nutty
Golly it's cuckoo at Sander's Playhouse!
(Ha ha ha ha)
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This has the tone of a Tim and Eric sketch. Especially his bizarre delivery of this line and goofy expression in the final frame.
What's funny is that we all know Sneepsnoop doesn't have a Butters. So he's moderating these comments himself. Here we can see "21 comments" still visible, but nothing actually shows in the list:
Here he is going on and on about how great Islamist Zohran Mamdani is, when the fanatics he supports from the “religion of peace” would throw Jaron off of a building in 15 seconds for being a troon.
If you lobotomized Grok and then told it to create a parody of a “male feminist” you’d get Sanders. I dip into this thread once every few months and this shit is the exact same posts as five years ago. It would be way more interesting if he snapped but we’ll never get that lucky.
Sander turned out to be 100x the cow and clout chaser that everyone expected Jazz or his mother to become. Also looks like Jazz will be going full-bore into wigs in about five years, because that hairline is sprinting to the back faster than Bo Jackson through the Kingdome tunnel.
He is using chatGPT to write these. “That’s not X, it’s Y dressed up like Z” is one of chatGPT’s favorite structures. Disgusting! So many of his posts have telltale signs of chatGPT.
That’s not being an influencer—that’s being a fat retarded Jeet-lookin faggot dressed up like being a positive male role model
“Men standing up by stepping up for others” is an absolutely terrible title and sandstorm is absolutely terrible at everything.
Edited because I keep thinking about how bad this branding is. The on-screen text says "Men who are stepping up to stand up for others," but Sandblast says "Men who are standing up to step up for others." The fact that even he can't remember which is correct shows how incoherent and muddy it is. It makes me think of the slogan Buster Bluth put on his protest pin:
The Only Scary Thing About A One-Armed Man is the Fact That He Feels His One Arm is Good For Nothing But Trying to Scare Someone.
Wouldn't something like "Men step up by standing up for others" or even just "Men stepping up" be less wordy and still capture what he's trying to say? It's still terrible. But I think it makes a little more sense.
I can't believe he supposedly has an advanced degree in this useless shit and still can't get the basics right. (e.g., not knowing what "POV" means in a digital context, thinking he's winning at influencing by sperging out for years because some meathead lightly bullied him once, his utter inability to speak naturally in front of a camera.)
He'd be loathsome regardless, but he's ineffective and loathsome, and I find that especially offensive.
Nice of Jaron to use a beauty filter on his own face but not on Ari.
Curious how he’s maintained his rack even after the GLP-1 weight loss. That’s rare for actual women to drop that much weight and stay well past a DD cup. Neither Ari or Jeanette are amply bosomed. I think he got secret implants.
If he got implants, then it's a Tori Spelling type of disaster:
IIRC, Tori has a concave chest which is why hers look bad. In Jaron's case I think it might be down to gynecomastia not behaving the same way ordinary female boobs do.
Curious how he’s maintained his rack even after the GLP-1 weight loss. That’s rare for actual women to drop that much weight and stay well past a DD cup. Neither Ari or Jeanette are amply bosomed. I think he got secret implants.
