Incels.is (Previously known as /r/incels) - Subreddit's banned, entitled Manchildren whine about why they can't get laid.

If you really had to who would you sex?

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Celestial Peace dijo:
@PPEcel, I honestly believe that a huge chunk of incels, self-identified or not, are on the spectrum. Like, barring other potential comorbidities such as ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder, there isn't other explanation. If you know a thing or two about autism, you know that rumination is a pattern in the spectrum, which leads to obsessive behavior, crashing out, fits of rage, frowning, etc, and that might be a deterrent for women, thus making them chronically alone.
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Statistically true
 
Celestial Peace dijo:
@PPEcel, I honestly believe that a huge chunk of incels, self-identified or not, are on the spectrum. Like, barring other potential comorbidities such as ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder, there isn't other explanation. If you know a thing or two about autism, you know that rumination is a pattern in the spectrum, which leads to obsessive behavior, crashing out, fits of rage, frowning, etc, and that might be a deterrent for women, thus making them chronically alone.
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This tracks with what I've seen. 90% of the users on .is are either: diagnosed as autistic outright, suspecting it, or have something else like ADHD or an anxiety disorder. This also goes for the jannies. Realistically the only NT person on the janny board there is Ryo_Hazuki, and even he admits to being "low IQ".
 
Spunt dijo:
This is why people get exasperated talking to you. You don't engage with ideas any more. You don't have any awareness of how you come across. The way you come across is as someone determined to be as unhappy as possible, to fight your way back into the crab bucket. You provide dumbshit canned responses to good advice. That's why people throw up their arms and say "Fine! Be miserable! But fuck off and be miserable somewhere else, I'm done with your shit."
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I have so many experiences like that with trying to help incels. You cannot redeem someone against their will. Some people just decide they want to be losers and thats it
 
A random street in Duluth dijo:
Some people just decide they want to be losers and thats it
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You know, I'm someone who's all for autonomy and accountability.

But, sometimes, it's a logical conclusion people like him arrive at. If that's flawed or not, it's on you, but, if you think about it, makes sense: if one is a chronic loser and the only change is for the worse, why the fuck even bother?

And seriously, you gotta be honest with yourself: do you REALLY want to help someone as fucked as an incel? Do you REALLY think what you say it's going to magically prove them, if that's even possible, that they can revert all the damage?

Do you think if you tell a patient with terminal disease that they should have positive thinking or whatever, that's gonna change the fact they'll succumb to the disease and die? The same goes for an incel.

And if they claim to be an ex-incel, they're liars, because they didn't went deep down enough in the rabbit hole that is being an incel. They're wannabe faggots.

I'd rather waste my energy with someone who has a real chance of progress.
 
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@Agares
 
Celestial Peace dijo:
Do you think if you tell a patient with terminal disease that they should have positive thinking or whatever, that's gonna change the fact they'll succumb to the disease and die? The same goes for an incel.
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Incels have problems that would be trivially solvable with normal human effort well within their capabilities. They are incels precisely because they chose wallowing in their misery and looking for oh-woe-to-me excuses instead of fixing their shit. They WANT to be losers. There is no redeeming someone who wants the comfort of being a total loser and not even trying. No amount of help no matter how thorough it might be or no advice, no no matter how enlightening it might be can help them. They want to seethe in their pit and blame the world for not making them winners.
 
A random street in Duluth dijo:
Incels have problems that would be trivially solvable with normal human effort well within their capabilities.
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If you think their problem is only a matter of taking a bath or wearing better clothes, you're greatly mistaken. A sped will be a sped regardless if he's well-groomed or not.

An incel acting like a normal person is just pure Uncanny Valley shit. It's like an alien trying to fit into human society by mimicking human behavior, and that'd the best shrinks have to offer an incel: mimicking.
 
A random street in Duluth dijo:
Incels have problems that would be trivially solvable with normal human effort well within their capabilities. They are incels precisely because they chose wallowing in their misery and looking for oh-woe-to-me excuses instead of fixing their shit. They WANT to be losers. There is no redeeming someone who wants the comfort of being a total loser and not even trying. No amount of help no matter how thorough it might be or no advice, no no matter how enlightening it might be can help them. They want to seethe in their pit and blame the world for not making them winners.
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Same sin all of the lolcows have here... Pride.

Can't look inwards and question themselves, so they blame everyone else.

I will not deny there absolutely is prejudice towards people who are unfortunate looking (I know personally, I am quite literally facially disfigured and I've mentioned it several times) but you have to find SOME strengths to capitalize on.

Life is hard, but you have to try otherwise you can't complain.
 
BPD Gunt Rider dijo:
Oh, and @PPEcel, care to give your thoughts about leaving incels.is.
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I am a little saddened, because I am finally closing one chapter of my life. At the same time, as I look back, I feel proud that this one small website has survived so many censorship attempts.

I joined Incels.is back in 2018, but did not become one of the more recognizable users until the COVID era. At that point, I was pretty invested in the forum, because the forum gave me a place to vent, and I didn't really have much else to do because the powers that be made it illegal to touch grass (unless you were burning cities down, for some reason).

In mid-to-late 2021, I learned from Naama Kates (who had reached out to me on Twitter) that the NYTimes' Megan Twohey (of #MeToo fame) had a new target: Incels.is. Some of you may recall that in December 2021, Twohey published a piece on Sanctioned Suicide (KF thread here). What most of you probably did not know is that Twohey's original target was Incels.is, not SS, and that she hounded Kates for months to that end. Twohey's editors must ultimately have decided that SS was a more compelling target than Incels.is was.

It was pretty obvious that Twohey didn't give two shits about anyone killing themselves, and that her end goal was to build public support for introducing European-style speech codes to the United States, which of course must be stopped at all costs. The First Amendment means nothing if every feminist, troon, and niggerfaggot is granted a heckler's veto over the "modern public square," (as the Supreme Court described social media in Packingham v. North Carolina). Our discourse would forever be held hostage by our most fragile and neurotic. Incels.is is an easy initial target for wannabe censorious apparatchiks because incels are edgy and the least sympathetic demographic to both the left and right. Incels.is is also a small website, and does not have the litigation budget that NetChoice does. Zuckerberg can afford to pay Paul Clement $3k an hour to bitchslap state legislators up and down the federal courts, which he has been doing to great effect. Those of us living off of Cheeto dust, whether literally or metaphorically, obviously cannot.

As such, I felt that the existence of Incels.is was worth supporting out of principle. I joined the Incels.is mod team shortly after Serge left the forum as a result of the NYTimes article. I knew that modding an incel forum probably wasn’t my lifelong calling, but I thought it an intellectually interesting hobby while I sorted out the remainder of my life. One of my first acts was drafting a letter to then-U.S. Attorney General Merrick Garland defending SS, in response to a letter by a feminist lawyer who accused @afounder of committing murder and demanded a federal investigation into both SS and Incels.is. (The late Frederick Brennan erroneously claimed that Null was involved in the letter that I wrote.)

The first change I lobbied for was to push out a handful of users affiliated with Nathan Larson's network. I received some pushback for this. They were a tiny minority of the forum, but they were far more online than anyone else, and they'd tag each other whenever they saw a post that they deemed "agecuckery". Then they'd pile on anyone who they deemed the "agecuck". The issue with pedophiles is that, given how universally reviled they are, their numbers would multiply quickly if one of them ever found any community whose content moderation policies failed to smite them out of existence on the spot. I saw anyone affiliated with the Larson network as a threat to the continued existence of incels.is, and seeing as the forums they established after they'd been removed from .is are now dead, I have been proven right.

Several months after the NYTimes hitpiece, the CCDH and WaPo’s Taylor Lorenz targeted us. They'd even managed to get a handful of congressional Dems to ask Google and Cloudflare to stop providing services to us. We made our case by essentially telling them to STFU as politely as possible.

Over time, the frequency of these and other hit jobs gradually died down, owing to a series of legal and political developments that significantly weakened our leftist would-be censors' positions. Justice Thomas, who in legal circles was tipped to be the anti-S230 justice (owing to his statement in Malwarebytes v. Enigma Software in 2020), all but changed his mind by the time Twitter v. Taamneh and Gonzalez v. Google was decided in 2023. With the threat of a narrowed S230 having subsided, which had hung over Big Tech like a sword of Damocles, the platforms’ in-house legal teams felt emboldened to simply ignore left-wing pressure campaigns. Big Tech also realized that they had over-hired during the COVID era, and started to lay off the employees that were most likely to sympathize with left-wing groups (i.e. 23-year-old DEI hires in "trust and safety" teams). Those employees who remained had by then learned that caving into leftists only encouraged them to make more demands. Then Elon bought Twitter. And after that, the second Trump administration took office. The CEO of CCDH, Imran Ahmed, who just a few years ago was in cahoots with Senate Majority Whip Dick Durbin and referred to Incels.is in discussions with State Department officials, has now been sanctioned by Secretary of State Marco Rubio.

Today, Incels.is’ position is better than ever, both in terms of its likelihood of survival and its usage/visitation metrics. I trust that @afounder will keep it alive.

Of course, as the threats to Incels.is’ survival gradually subsided, I spent more and more time on the non-online part of my life. I won't belabor the point, but roughly two years ago I had an event that made me permanently ineligible for membership on Incels.is. I resigned as moderator, but several months later I realized that that event was an affair rather than an emotionally committed relationship, and I missed the work that I did for the forum, so I returned.

Earlier this week I came to realize that it was dishonest of me to have returned, so I explained to the userbase why I was no longer eligible for membership on the forum, and resigned a second time, this time permanently.

I don’t know what the users have said about me because I was subsequently, rightfully banned, but I can understand if many of them feel betrayed.

What I will say is that:
  • I do not think I am better than anyone who remains on Incels.is, because what happened to me was in part a result of the same immutable characteristics that have defined everyone’s lives. My life experiences that have culminated thus far would have been different had I been six inches shorter, or six inches taller, or 30 IQ points faster, or 30 IQ points slower.
  • Dating is hilariously broken for zoomers and millennials, normies or otherwise. This could be the subject of a dissertation-length essay but can be summed up in one sentence: Everyone has standards but no emotional availability. Those on the lower end of the social hierarchy are perfectly entitled to wonder whether the juice is worth the self-improvement squeeze. No amount of shaming will adjust this calculus.
  • Over the past two years, I have discovered that I possess a greater capacity for cognitive empathy compared to just about anyone who has chided incels for “lacking empathy”. What leftists, especially middle-class white female leftists, refer to as “empathy” is not actually empathy at all. It is simply a misguided sense of guilt that they feel when they see a struggling member of a demographic that they have been socially conditioned into believing is “oppressed”. That's why they feel "empathy" for gangbangers with 50 priors, but have nothing but contempt and disgust for the socially awkward computer science major. On the other hand, I have empathy for those who are truly oppressed, as defined by the most universal metric of failure—having genes too poor to do the one thing that is the object of every living thing that has ever existed: continue one’s lineage. I can understand the perspective of inceldom even if I no longer live from that perspective myself. That is what true empathy is.
 
A random street in Duluth dijo:
Incels have problems that would be trivially solvable with normal human effort well within their capabilities. They are incels precisely because they chose wallowing in their misery and looking for oh-woe-to-me excuses instead of fixing their shit. They WANT to be losers. There is no redeeming someone who wants the comfort of being a total loser and not even trying. No amount of help no matter how thorough it might be or no advice, no no matter how enlightening it might be can help them. They want to seethe in their pit and blame the world for not making them winners.
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You know, in a weird, fucked up way, there is a bit of a merit to being a loser or on the bottom rung of the social ladder. Not having anything to lose is a bit of a strange freedom in itself.

Incels, losers they may be, either find comfort in the fact that they are losers, or they hate their own situation and don't see the other side of the relationship coin. Many of them have far bigger problems in life than "no GF."

I've also noticed that a lot of the more outspoken incels are spergs of some sort. I kind of have a personal theory that spergs aren't meant to date or have girlfriends or wives. Whatever their "special interests" are should be enough to satisfy them in life.

Of course, there are plenty of spergs who don't like being spergs. Many of them end up being incels.
 
Celestial Peace dijo:
If you think their problem is only a matter of taking a bath or wearing better clothes, you're greatly mistaken. A sped will be a sped regardless if he's well-groomed or not.
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Bullshit. Being a sperg and a shit person is not an excuse and completely unacceptable. Incels are just whiny bitches who want to blame external factors for being failures, rather than applying themselves. They want to wallow in their misery and blame the world for being unfair.
Rekeita's Kidneys dijo:
I will not deny there absolutely is prejudice towards people who are unfortunate looking (I know personally, I am quite literally facially disfigured and I've mentioned it several times) but you have to find SOME strengths to capitalize on.
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It was never about the looks but the mindset. Look at that dude with literally no legs or arms being married. Fucking Stephan Hawking managed to have a gf.
PPEcel dijo:
I won't belabor the point, but roughly two years ago I had an event that made me permanently ineligible for membership on Incels.is. I resigned as moderator
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That is the most grimly serious way I've ever heard someone describe getting laid. Massively agreeing with the treatment of pedos though. If one if them ever manages to weasel their way in, soon their entire gaggle is there and continuously try to test the waters for posting ever more degenerate shit.
Duke Nukem dijo:
You know, in a weird, fucked up way, there is a bit of a merit to being a loser or on the bottom rung of the social ladder. Not having anything to lose is a bit of a strange freedom in itself.
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That does not apply to incels though. They defined themselves by not getting sex despite wanting to, involuntarily celibate, that is their designator. I used to know a lot of jolly fucking nerds, the huge neckbeard types who did FORTRAN and Cobol legacy coding for fun, played their warhammers, their MGT, their D&D, argued about favorite magical girl anime, genuinely got upset about their favorite Star Trek captains and so on, yet somehow I never heard them seethe about women once, the lack of pussy did not define them. And somehow, one by one life drifted a quirk chungus in their way, they got girlfriends and got married, despite some of them losing their V-cards in their forties. . Incels are the complete opposite, they are virgins with rage, spending their days thirsting about pussy, green with envy about Chad. They WANT to be social,. they WANT the pussy so badly that they keep trooning out, so claiming they don't care is just disingenuous
 
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